What precautions do you take while meeting members IRL?

[Randumb123]

Greetings beautiful people of the wild world of cam modelling. I am the significant other of a wonderful human being whom also happens to be a successful cam model. This January she is going to participate in her first meet and greet with her regulars and fans at AVN. She is also going to be taking a handful of long time regs out for drinks in the evening.

She and I communicate on a damn near telepathic level and up until this point I've never felt worried/anxious/concerned about the various elements of camming, however I'd be lying if I said this didn't make me nervous for her safety. I'm going to Vegas as well, but due to her camming style and type of regular she attracts we decided she being open about the relationship while in 'show mode' wouldn't be best for her brand, so I can't exactly be right there.

So ladies... is simply staying in a public space good enough? Should we hire some muscle to keep a watchful eye on the situation from a small distance? What did you do, or would do when meeting with cam site members?

I just want to keep my boo safe

Thank you for reading.

 

[Serenity_Tam]

I would send her to a community of models directly to get information and experiences from models directly.

 

[Sevrin]

So, the model is meeting with a bunch of fans who mostly don't know each other by sight. These people don't know you, so why not mix in with the rest of them as if you were just another adoring pervert? If you don't think you can pull that off convincingly, then by all means sit at the next table with a buddy or something.

But like Tam says, best of all would be for her to get verified and ask her own questions about close-quarter public relations behind the Models Only curtain. And no peeking, you.

 

[Vera]

You want to hear my real, real opinion, as an IRL sexworker? Girls talk. The sexwork community has zero tolerance for abusive people. Tell her to get a verified account and post in models only. Safety is our biggest priority and most of us would be happy to post our feelings and methods there. This question is painfully pimpish and if she wants to know more, she can either google about escort screening or ask for herself. Escorts and their bookers have a very good system for weeding out the baddies, but don't expect us to spoon feed this to you here.

 

[gudheadt]

i kind of understand why its op and not he's SO that are posting. he clearly stated that they have keept their relationship private and not in the "show mode" because it wouldn't be best for her brand. i can think of atleast 1 Top Model that i know of, that fits OP criteria, who are going to AVN and meeting her fans for the first time. and who have not publicely said anything about having a SO.

this forum gets visited by both Models and members. and it does not take that many hours before stuff is spread around. even if they got a verified account on here and posted in the models only section it would still be out there that the person got a SO. and as you said. girls talk.

my suggestion would be the same as sevrin said, just blend in to the crowd. or be close by her with a friend incase anything happends.
i will say from my own experience meeting with people that have seen me on cam and are my regulairs. they are the most nicest people you can find. because they know you, and know where your boarders go. since they have spend a lot of time with you in your room and such. trust me you get to know a person really well when watching them on cam over a long span of time.

thats just my 2cent on the matter.

 

[AerynShade]

i kind of understand why its op and not he's SO that are posting. he clearly stated that they have keept their relationship private and not in the "show mode" because it wouldn't be best for her brand. i can think of atleast 1 Top Model that i know of, that fits OP criteria, who are going to AVN and meeting her fans for the first time. and who have not publicely said anything about having a SO.

this forum gets visited by both Models and members. and it does not take that many hours before stuff is spread around. even if they got a verified account on here and posted in the models only section it would still be out there that the person got a SO. and as you said. girls talk.

my suggestion would be the same as sevrin said, just blend in to the crowd. or be close by her with a friend incase anything happends.
i will say from my own experience meeting with people that have seen me on cam and are my regulairs. they are the most nicest people you can find. because they know you, and know where your boarders go. since they have spend a lot of time with you in your room and such. trust me you get to know a person really well when watching them on cam over a long span of time.

thats just my 2cent on the matter.

You actually have no idea what we talk about in Models Only. Nor how well we keep quiet the confidential information that might be posted there.
There might be many things models do to keep themselves/each other safe when meeting members that we might not want to openly share because then we would be telling potentially harmful people our safety measures.

There are so many new models joining ACF that we won't have any way to connect anyone asking about safety to the OP. Just another model asking how to protect herself with the help of her male friend.

I think it's nice that you want to protect your ladyfriend, @Randumb123. But honestly the best advice is only accessible to her. I hope you both have a nice time at AVN.

 

[gudheadt]

You actually have no idea what we talk about in Models Only.

i agree with this point some what. but to go back to the prevoius post. girls/people talk thats just the nature of humans. and i might not know everything you girls post about, but i do know of some of the stuff that goes on in there, because people talk.

lets say i or another male model needed this kind of information. what would we do? this might also help OP find other ways of getting it incase he's SO wont make a account on here and ask about it.

 

[Vera]

When I said "girls talk," I mean we (esp IRL sexworkers) talk about abusive clients and have zero issue blacklisting people who are violent or problematic. I don't mean we can't keep our mouths shut when it comes to personal information. That is a gross misunderstanding of my post.

 

[Mila_]

Some common sense measures:

1) Choose a place that is public and feels public too. A dive bar is a public place and might be nice but choose a well lit big space with many exits.

2) Keep the date short and sweet. Choose one venue and stick to it for the duration of the date. Things like bar hopping are fun but changing venues gives plenty of opportunity for bad shit to happen.

3) Ask regulars for a photo of their ID and a photo of themselves holding their ID. If she has never seen their faces then having a short Skype session where they show her their ID is a nice plus.

4) Run background checks.

There are other things she can do to protect herself but she will need to be verified to have access to that information.

 

[mynameisbob84]

Greetings beautiful people of the wild world of cam modelling. I am the significant other of a wonderful human being whom also happens to be a successful cam model. This January she is going to participate in her first meet and greet with her regulars and fans at AVN. She is also going to be taking a handful of long time regs out for drinks in the evening.

She and I communicate on a damn near telepathic level and up until this point I've never felt worried/anxious/concerned about the various elements of camming, however I'd be lying if I said this didn't make me nervous for her safety. I'm going to Vegas as well, but due to her camming style and type of regular she attracts we decided she being open about the relationship while in 'show mode' wouldn't be best for her brand, so I can't exactly be right there.

So ladies... is simply staying in a public space good enough? Should we hire some muscle to keep a watchful eye on the situation from a small distance? What did you do, or would do when meeting with cam site members?

I just want to keep my boo safe

Thank you for reading.

This bolded bit jumped out a bit. What type of regulars is she attracting and why does it matter so much to them that she be single? I get that a lot of cam girls make more money whilst allowing their regulars to fantasise about being with them and that explicitly stating that they're in a relationship kinda kills that fantasy. But allowing that fantasy to exist in an online setting strikes me as being much different to doing the same when there are face to face meetings involved.

I would think that a "hey guys, I know that when I'm online camming, my cam girl persona is that of a dirty, flirty, single woman, but IRL, I have a boyfriend who looks out for me and he'll be keeping an eye out for me when we meet up. But don't worry, he'll keep out of our way and you won't even know he's there" would be completely reasonable. And any member who wouldn't agree to those terms or would try to pressure your girlfriend in to meeting without you being there at all, probably is type of member you should be worried about and would do well to not meet up with at all.

 

[mynameisbob84]

You actually have no idea what we talk about in Models Only.

I am 90% certain that MO consists exclusively of talk about boobs, menstrual cycles, cats, and the sharing of sexy Morgan Freeman pictures.

 

[AerynShade]

I am 90% certain that MO consists exclusively of talk about boobs, menstrual cycles, cats, and the sharing of sexy Morgan Freeman pictures.

WHO TOLD YOU ABOUT MORGAN FREEMAN?!!?!

 

[mynameisbob84]

WHO TOLD YOU ABOUT MORGAN FREEMAN?!!?!

It takes only a second to look at the eyes of a cam girl, and know that those eyes lust for Morgan Freeman. It's as obvious as it is understandable.

 

[Mila_]

This bolded bit jumped out a bit. What type of regulars is she attracting and why does it matter so much to them that she be single? I get that a lot of cam girls make more money whilst allowing their regulars to fantasise about being with them and that explicitly stating that they're in a relationship kinda kills that fantasy. But allowing that fantasy to exist in an online setting strikes me as being much different to doing the same when there are face to face meetings involved.

I would think that a "hey guys, I know that when I'm online camming, my cam girl persona is that of a dirty, flirty, single woman, but IRL, I have a boyfriend who looks out for me and he'll be keeping an eye out for me when we meet up. But don't worry, he'll keep out of our way and you won't even know he's there" would be completely reasonable. And any member who wouldn't agree to those terms or would try to pressure your girlfriend in to meeting without you being there at all, probably is type of member you should be worried about and would do well to not meet up with at all.

Its not just camgirls. Famous people do it too. They claim to be single when they are not. Why? Because people are more entertained when they can color themselves in. Fantasizing has a lot to do with giving them the right canvas to do it. This can be even more critical for camgirls because we depend exclusively on tips from the viewers themselves. Why ruin the fantasy for them?

If a camgirl meets her regulars in person she is still in character so she should uphold whatever image she keeps on cam. She is not going to give them her real name, start talking about her mother and her period, or show up looking like shit. So why tell them about her SO when she has been working hard to keep that information from them on cam?

 

[Sevrin]

If a camgirl meets her regulars in person she is still in character so she should uphold whatever image she keeps on cam. She is not going to give them her real name, start talking about her mother and her period, or show up looking like shit. So why tell them about her SO when she has been working hard to keep that information from them on cam?

Pretty much. It's also about context. This is not some individual the model has gotten to know well, who would be clued in to her RL relationship status, but a bunch of members who are invited to a meet & greet at the AVN show.

And any member who wouldn't agree to those terms or would try to pressure your girlfriend in to meeting without you being there at all, probably is type of member you should be worried about and would do well to not meet up with at all.

That's not the situation at all. There's no one member and no one is pressuring anyone.

 

[mynameisbob84]

So why tell them about her SO when she has been working hard to keep that information from them on cam?

I guess I see it as a potential safety issue. On cam, letting a member think they can have you probably isn't going to do too much harm. Members can fantasise about you, but as long as you're just an image on their computer screen, there's a separation that keeps things from getting too real, and keeps models in relative safety. And I can see where hinting that you're available when you're not might lead to extra income. When it comes to meeting members in real life though, I would have thought that models would want the members that they're meeting with to understand that, despite what they may portray on cam, they're not available and that anything sexual or romantic isn't going to happen.

 

[Serenity_Tam]

I have avoided saying this. But I am going to because this thread is still alive.
I suggested her to get her own damn account as has been mentioned because it will help her in the long run improve her cam game.
BUT mostly for me...
when I see a dude asking questions for his cam girl "girlfriend" I don't believe they are actually a significant other but instead some:

A) White night being over zealous but also trying to control this cam girl by not sharing a plethora of resources with her that he is aware of ... but doesn't share? Because he wants control? Wants to feel like he can give info and be helpful but not sharing the most important piece of info? Doesn't want her to find out that he's a creep? I dunno.

B) A total stalker living out a fantasy as a boyfriend while trying to figure out what security a cam girl might have so they can try and circumvent it.

 

[EspiKvlt]

Even if the OP is actually her SO, I don't know, these kinds of threads always rub me wrong. Because why isn't she the one asking? Even if they are actually her SO, it still comes off as controlling to me.

 

[RebelleHart]

I guess I see it as a potential safety issue. On cam, letting a member think they can have you probably isn't going to do too much harm. Members can fantasise about you, but as long as you're just an image on their computer screen, there's a separation that keeps things from getting too real, and keeps models in relative safety. And I can see where hinting that you're available when you're not might lead to extra income. When it comes to meeting members in real life though, I would have thought that models would want the members that they're meeting with to understand that, despite what they may portray on cam, they're not available and that anything sexual or romantic isn't going to happen.

She can make it very clear to her members nothing sexual or romantic will happen without having to confess to a boyfriend. In fact, I suspect most models probably send out a form or something for them to sign before the meeting takes place that outlines what will and will not happen.

Also, I want to take this opportunity to remind everyone that just because a cam girl (or any girl for that matter) is single does not make her available to you sexually, romantically, or otherwise.

 

[mynameisbob84]

She can make it very clear to her members nothing sexual or romantic will happen without having to confess to a boyfriend. In fact, I suspect most models probably send out a form or something for them to sign before the meeting takes place that outlines what will and will not happen.

Also, I want to take this opportunity to remind everyone that just because a cam girl (or any girl for that matter) is single does not make her available to you sexually, romantically, or otherwise.

I agree. But the only reason for wanting to keep the boyfriend a secret that I can think of, is to let members think that something sexual or romantic could happen. If she tells them that nothing like that is going to happen, it accomplishes the same thing as admitting to having a boyfriend, which is exactly what the model in question doesn't want to do.

 

[LenaSexton]

I agree with Serenity_TAM 100%.

I have avoided saying this. But I am going to because this thread is still alive.
I suggested her to get her own damn account as has been mentioned because it will help her in the long run improve her cam game.
BUT mostly for me...
when I see a dude asking questions for his cam girl "girlfriend" I don't believe they are actually a significant other but instead some:

A) White night being over zealous but also trying to control this cam girl by not sharing a plethora of resources with her that he is aware of ... but doesn't share? Because he wants control? Wants to feel like he can give info and be helpful but not sharing the most important piece of info? Doesn't want her to find out that he's a creep? I dunno.

B) A total stalker living out a fantasy as a boyfriend while trying to figure out what security a cam girl might have so they can try and circumvent it.

 

[Mila_]

I agree. But the only reason for wanting to keep the boyfriend a secret that I can think of, is to let members think that something sexual or romantic could happen. If she tells them that nothing like that is going to happen, it accomplishes the same thing as admitting to having a boyfriend, which is exactly what the model in question doesn't want to do.

There are a million reasons to conceal that information. Some girls will even build an entire persona for cam. They create a character with different interests, background, appearance and even accent than themselves. This is primarily the job of an entertainer and creating a different persona can help create a boundary between your real life and your cam life.

But even if it was done for the sole purpose of conveying availability there is a big difference between saying "I am single but I would never date anyone off this site" and saying "Oh yeah, I have a boyfriend, we live together, he is in the other room actually, his name is Chad and he likes surfing, playing guitar and making out". In one instance you are clearly stating your boundary while leaving the other side of the bed empty in their minds. They know they can't have you, but neither can anyone else. On the second scenario you just put a mental image of you making sweet sweet love to Chad in the same bed you had a private with your doting reg. It can be bad for business.

 

[mynameisbob84]

There are a million reasons to conceal that information. Some girls will even build an entire persona for cam. They create a character with different interests, background, appearance and even accent than themselves. This is primarily the job of an entertainer and creating a different persona can help create a boundary between your real life and your cam life.

But even if it was done for the sole purpose of conveying availability there is a big difference between saying "I am single but I would never date anyone off this site" and saying "Oh yeah, I have a boyfriend, we live together, he is in the other room actually, his name is Chad and he likes surfing, playing guitar and making out". In one instance you are clearly stating your boundary while leaving the other side of the bed empty in their minds. They know they can't have you, but neither can anyone else. On the second scenario you just put a mental image of you making sweet sweet love to Chad in the same bed you had a private with your doting reg. It can be bad for business.

I guess I can see that. I still think that pretending to be single to promote an air of availability is one of (if not the) most common reasons for doing as much, but I concede there are other reasons too and that there are members out there who would tip an unavailable but single lady more than one in a relationship, for various reasons. Chad sounds like a swell dood.

 

[Ambers Troll]

When they just knock on the door? ... If you don't want to be armed, nothing beats a good guard dog to lay fear into unwanted guests.
Unwanted meetings on the street? ... If you don't want to be armed, nothing beats a cold heart, some street smarts, and vicious temperament in removing unwanted approaches.
Planned meetings? ... If you think that being armed is overdoing personal security, nothing beats a public place, a clear set of boundaries (including a time to end a date), some street smarts, and someone on call at the end of the meeting to protect against disaster.

Even if you are armed this is no guarantee of safety, some people are just bat-shit crazy or psycho. Having said all this, life is about taking the occasional risk, so have fun and always, always, always, trust your own instinct about other people. [It is not that your instinct will always be right, but that you can forgive yourself where it goes wrong.]

 

[SoTxBob]

I've known a couple gals that did avn/expo meet ups. Its really quite simple. Besides the understood "nothing sexual at all," never be alone with them and keep them all in a group. If she does go out with a handful of guys, grab another camgirl or 2 to go with and buy them dinner or whatever. Take your own cab/uber too.

 

[SweetJinxxx]

I have a member who actually lives in the same state as me, he KNOWS im married, and such. Still wants to meet, still has the fantasy of "one day getting to be wit me, laying with me"... etc all dirty thoughts. BUT at the same time he is respectful and constantly asks before skype shows, if my husband doesnt mind. So idk about the whole portraying single vs taken but alot of guys dont care whether said cam model is taken. Shes a cam model, showing her body and being online for the guys that can afford it... AND as long as she is camming and being nice to the members, they will most likely be interested

 

[AwesomeKate]

When I mention I am dating someone new, I get swamped with questions about their body, their dick size, how I feel about them, etc. I really don't like discussing my irl romances on cam because I don't like having it evaluated and judged. There are always people who give me unsolicited advice about my partners too, whether it be out of envy or genuine concern.

As far as meeting members, I have been lucky to have really great people win my date raffles. They didn't attempt to push my boundaries but were still fun and flirty with me. I didnt bring a chaperone along with me, but I made sure I got to know the person a bit before meeting up. I would not suggest meeting a person that you haven't Skyped with first. Get a feel for how they will treat you irl.

 

[Insert username here]

I have to say I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, how the women here are very protective of each other and information that could be harmful. BRAVO. To the OP, my suggestion would be simple. Hire a really big scary dude to stand close, but, not to close... Perves love their "Objects of desire", but, one really big scary dude close buy would keep them in line.

 

[SweetJinxxx]

When I mention I am dating someone new, I get swamped with questions about their body, their dick size, how I feel about them, etc. I really don't like discussing my irl romances on cam because I don't like having it evaluated and judged. There are always people who give me unsolicited advice about my partners too, whether it be out of envy or genuine concern.

As far as meeting members, I have been lucky to have really great people win my date raffles. They didn't attempt to push my boundaries but were still fun and flirty with me. I didnt bring a chaperone along with me, but I made sure I got to know the person a bit before meeting up. I would not suggest meeting a person that you haven't Skyped with first. Get a feel for how they will treat you irl.

DEFINITELY THIS, or "How good is he in bed, i bet i can please you better than he, do yall cam/make videos/pictures together? does he know, is he okay with this?" like after awhile it gets annoying but i would probably be curious as well.

 

[DonaDiabla]

Personally, I would not meet any of my clients. However, if it something like AVN then I would hire bodyguards to be near me at all times.I would greet my fans,hug them, and sign their autographs. I would do a one hour discussion with all of my fans, take photos,sign autographs, and leave.I would be professional at all times and expect my "fans" to do the same. At the same time, I would be happy to put on a show for my fans. I would have a custom-made gown, professionally done makeup, and treat this event like would be my last event ever. I would go all out but still be professional.