Scammed?

[MarieElise]

Well, you seem inclined to think everything relates to some kind of possible fetish.

Not accurate at all, but I'll accept the rest of what you wrote on that post. This needs correcting though, there is nothing I have said or done that would fairly lead you to that conclusion at all, but it's not a biggie.

 

[HeadyRaven]

Definitely wouldn’t be the first time someone has come here and wrote out their masturbatory fan fictions and tried to get us models, and even members, to partake in their fetishes for free. When someone talks about the same things over and over, and puts such elaborate description into those sorts of posts, that’s the vibe I get.

lol I realize I had a lot to learn about cam modeling, but now this is making me think I obviously have a LOT to learn now about fetishes. I'm having trouble imagining what kind of masturbatory content is in any of this topic.

I've seen posts on this forum that I thought members had made up a story, but it didn't occur to me that it could be sexually motivated. I am too vanilla.

 

[HeadyRaven]

The thing that struck me is that theres this stereotype that all cam models are narcissists and/or sociopaths.

Are you meaning that this is a stereotype in general, like among most people? or among customers? Just to be sure: I don't have that stereotype of cam models. I might have thought that a few years ago, based on a very specific two or three people, but not anymore. I haven't interacted with huge numbers of cam models, but the ones from sites I've met have been very nice and come off as just a range of different, normal people.

Saying things like "oh it gives them something to do and be happy about" etc

I really think she has sometimes made statements like that because she thought it sounded like something that I would feel better hearing. Like, more socially acceptable.

If that makes sense. In other words, different from the occasional other statements about how she really doesn't feel sorry for people in life, that if they make mistakes, for example, it's on them (kind of harsh, hardened)

you aren't just making this all up to jerk off to.

I can assure you that there is nothing about a discussion thread that's a turn on. Cam models in action, yes. Talking or writing about cam modeling or any of these topics, no. It's interesting intellectually but not some kind of sexual thing.

 

[MarieElise]

Are you meaning that this is a stereotype in general, like among most people? or among customers? Just to be sure:

It's a stereptype I've heard from both other models (and found particularly annoying) as well as some members who post on internet chat forums. What size and how representative this is of the general population, who use our services, I'm unsure. I'm super mathy and scientific, so I'd have to be really rigorous to find that out. Which I don't have time for. So I guess, I meant neither of those things.

If you think she just said it for your benefit, then nevermind what I previously said.

All of us can be harsh/ hardened with certain things. It's when it's unreasonable and across the board, that it might indicate something deeper. On that topic, I'd also like to note that burned out, exhausted people, tend to have less bandwidth for empathy too. Maybe not relevant to this topic, but an important people fact, to remain aware of too, just socially. Sometimes people get emotionally exhausted.

ETA; Something which you will become if you keep listening to this person's stories, and don't set boundaries for yourself. If this is all true. That's honestly the main message I wanted to get across in this whole thread today.

 

[AudriTwo]

if i had a nickel for everytime an acf user admitted to having a fetish for "intellectual" convos, i'd have two nickels. which isn't a lot, but it's weird that it happened twice.

 

[Lover31660]

Are you meaning that this is a stereotype in general, like among most people? or among customers? Just to be sure: I don't have that stereotype of cam models. I might have thought that a few years ago, based on a very specific two or three people, but not anymore. I haven't interacted with huge numbers of cam models, but the ones from sites I've met have been very nice and come off as just a range of different, normal people.

I really think she has sometimes made statements like that because she thought it sounded like something that I would feel better hearing. Like, more socially acceptable.

If that makes sense. In other words, different from the occasional other statements about how she really doesn't feel sorry for people in life, that if they make mistakes, for example, it's on them (kind of harsh, hardened)

I can assure you that there is nothing about a discussion thread that's a turn on. Cam models in action, yes. Talking or writing about cam modeling or any of these topics, no. It's interesting intellectually but not some kind of sexual thing.

The bottom line is, viewers should enter every cam models' room, female or male, with a healthy dose of skepticism and remember it's ALL FANTASY.
I don't pay for friendship in IRL and won't do it for an online fantasy.
Tipping someone for an item off a menu or becuase you like the person, or taking someone private is something else.
But leave your feelings at the door because it won't end well if you get in too deep.
Then you'll end up here in yet another "Fell in love with a cam model" post.

 

[Lover31660]

I have to admit, the stories I've read here, the responses to those stories, and one side of my brain telling the other side this is all bullshit, saved me from going down that rabbit hold before I spent anymore that I already have.
I've already said, if a cammer starts asking for money outside tips or private shows, im out.
The fantasy can be fun, but IRL interaction and fun is better, IMHO.
It's helped me keep a level head when I venture into a room.

 

[HeadyRaven]

The bottom line is, viewers should enter every cam models' room, female or male, with a healthy dose of skepticism and remember it's ALL FANTASY.
I don't pay for friendship in IRL and won't do it for an online fantasy.
Tipping someone for an item off a menu or becuase you like the person, or taking someone private is something else.
But leave your feelings at the door because it won't end well if you get in too deep.
Then you'll end up here in yet another "Fell in love with a cam model" post.

Yeah, a lot of problems would be avoided if viewers kept a rule in mind: If you pay for someone to act like your friend or girlfriend, it's acting. It seems like this gets confusing for people more online than in real life. (Although "he's gone fell in love with a stripper" used to be a thing, I don't hear of that so much anymore).

At one end of the "fell in love with a cam model" stories, the viewer manages to fall "in love" with the model doing nothing except her job. It's anywhere from wishful thinking to delusion on the part of the guy.

At the other end, a model could be aiming for that outcome, and willing to cross the line in unethical ways (love cons).

There's probably grey area in between. But even in true love scams, it's not going to work on just anybody. I'm not saying it's excusable, but from what I've seen, the guys who fall for it were open to it or even looking for it, not remembering where they are. Scams happen on actual dating sites, so you would have to be even more skeptical about any idea of love on a cam site.

 

[HeadyRaven]

Something which you will become if you keep listening to this person's stories

This is a track back to weeks ago, but I realized I was thinking about this from time to time! I think you were right about something you mentioned.

I have known this person for quite a few years, and I used to laugh at these stories. I think they began to bother me some time ago, but I didn't realize what was bothering me. I'm wondering if maybe when I began visiting sites myself, interacting with other models, and thinking about it, I began seeing it differently.
She would say that it's just the job. She likes to say: Лох не мамонт, лох не вымрет (More or less: "Mammoths are extinct, but suckers will never die out") It's a funny expression, but not really. I think the main thing is, for a person who seems sweet and even caring in day to day life - this part of her is very cold! A little hard to reconcile.

 

[MarieElise]

This is a track back to weeks ago, but I realized I was thinking about this from time to time! I think you were right about something you mentioned.

I have known this person for quite a few years, and I used to laugh at these stories. I think they began to bother me some time ago, but I didn't realize what was bothering me. I'm wondering if maybe when I began visiting sites myself, interacting with other models, and thinking about it, I began seeing it differently.
She would say that it's just the job. She likes to say: Лох не мамонт, лох не вымрет (More or less: "Mammoths are extinct, but suckers will never die out") It's a funny expression, but not really. I think the main thing is, for a person who seems sweet and even caring in day to day life - this part of her is very cold! A little hard to reconcile.

Yeah too much of that gets very wearing, and is a total downer. I know what you mean. Different people "express" themselves differently though. Actions speak louder than words. I take most people's words with a huge grain of salt.

And the sad reality is that many people were not grown in an environment where empathy and or morals or ethics, were productive to develop, or pertinent to their day to day survival. But who fucking knows man.

 

[LilyLaughing]

re-read your post because it sounds to me like you have answered your own question, if you are still not sure, what would your advice be if a friend asked you the same question about the same situation.

You are so damn likeable. No wonder you blow so many other creators of any gender out of the water. (that sounded a bit dirtier than I intended: was attempting to compliment your brains and creativity.)