My original thread is here: https://www.ambercutie.com/forums/threads/camming-after-loss-of-mother.37339/
I felt I should update my previous thread, hopefully I am posting in the right place. I will say I came to this site when all this first started and read the threads on Romanian Love Scams because I was concerned. Yeah, I know, another one, roast me all you want...but I feel now I should put this out there so others who may see it can avoid what I went through, as the scam is a little different, and a little more insidious. I also know the models on this site don't do this sort of thing, and that the vast majority are honest. This is by no means meant to be a stereotype.
When I posted originally, I failed to say the "girlfriend" of mine and I had yet to meet due to coronavirus. I wonder now what would have happend if I showed up in Iasi on April 1st as planned, but it would have saved me a lot of suffering that's for sure. I will try to keep things short. A little background first
For a few months when the "romance" first started, I could not and would not pay on the site she used because I was going through a protracted divorce and I knew she only got a small portion of anything from the site. Plus she supposedly didn't want me to. We talked about this. She asked me to help with rent for her and her mother (because she didn't want her to know her job supposedly) in April so she could work from home when things shut down. In May she supposedly took a huge citation for not properly social distancing, which was a real thing in Romania, trust me I checked. I told her I would help best I could, but I was not doing well myself.
Here is where the crazy stuff starts....
She told me her studio had made a contest, first girl to a certain amount would win an extra $2k. This meant that she would make as much as I spent on tokens or more if she won. Perfect, I thought, "what great luck we have, now I can use a credit card to help"...nope! After this, more contests that of course had ever greater rewards, more money, win a car for "us", she was going to buy land for "us", ect. Eventually when things became hard, as I was always honest about financial and all things, she began to say she would pay me back. If I needed something, I could use her card, account....even sending me pictures of fake bank transfers that always failed. The crux de gras was to tell me she wanted to come to the university here, which meant a visa even in coronavirus times. Of course she needed to win more contests, and a final one to make sure she got paid before November 1st, the deadline to apply. I gave her the last I had, and told her I was relying on her to get it back to me fast, so I could pay my bills. A few days later, after she quit to "move to Belgium" for school (something planned I knew about), she ghosted me and blocked me on all forms of communication. Eventually I got her to email me, She admitted she had not applied, despite telling me twice she did, and I had an email from the university saying the same. Said she lost the money to taxes, but then posted photos of herself on vacation on her instagram, still living in Romania. Eventually I found evidence of more of the lies after I started thinking with my head instead of my heart. I will be paying for this life lesson for a long time.
Apparently she used her mothers death to get out of meeting like I talked about in the original post. She did give me her real name, address, phone #, mothers name other personal details, I have and had verified all these. I don't know why you would do that if you were trying to scam someone, but she did. I did what I should have done long ago when "dating" someone online from another country, I went to a background check company. Not much on it she had not already told me, but no civil citation and most disturbing I found was both parents were still alive. I had spent a lot of time and emotion helping her with that. I had found an old news article from a few years ago, when this first started, that said her and her boyfriend had blackmailed another girl with nude photos. I thought he was the ex. The guy got probation and a suspended sentence. I later found she had given me this guys phone number to "vote" for her in one of the contests. She even sent me photos of him and said he was an old "friend".
That's the short story. So I guess my warning is, no matter how much someone says they hate liars, are not fake, or even give you real personal information, there are some people out there that will mix as much truth, and maybe even real feelings, with lies to make the deception more real and play with your feelings and emotions. Part of me still wants to think she lied at the end because she was tired of ruining my life, she had said before she felt toxic to those she cared about. Maybe she was a pathological liar, didn't even know she was lying. Maybe someone else manipulated her into manipulating me. The gaslighting at the end though, telling me I had trust issues, makes that hard to believe now. I just worry other models from that studio (yes, I know its name) will try to use the same thing on other kind hearted and caring people. I have a recurring nightmare of her and others working together to see how much crazy things they can tell me and have me still be supportive. Yes, I'm seeing a trauma specialist.
In conclusion, any one in a similar situation, if something doesn't seem right or feels confusing, or if your here looking for validation for something....trust your instinct or ask more questions, because by the end you may not be able to get the answers.
I felt I should update my previous thread, hopefully I am posting in the right place. I will say I came to this site when all this first started and read the threads on Romanian Love Scams because I was concerned. Yeah, I know, another one, roast me all you want...but I feel now I should put this out there so others who may see it can avoid what I went through, as the scam is a little different, and a little more insidious. I also know the models on this site don't do this sort of thing, and that the vast majority are honest. This is by no means meant to be a stereotype.
When I posted originally, I failed to say the "girlfriend" of mine and I had yet to meet due to coronavirus. I wonder now what would have happend if I showed up in Iasi on April 1st as planned, but it would have saved me a lot of suffering that's for sure. I will try to keep things short. A little background first
For a few months when the "romance" first started, I could not and would not pay on the site she used because I was going through a protracted divorce and I knew she only got a small portion of anything from the site. Plus she supposedly didn't want me to. We talked about this. She asked me to help with rent for her and her mother (because she didn't want her to know her job supposedly) in April so she could work from home when things shut down. In May she supposedly took a huge citation for not properly social distancing, which was a real thing in Romania, trust me I checked. I told her I would help best I could, but I was not doing well myself.
Here is where the crazy stuff starts....
She told me her studio had made a contest, first girl to a certain amount would win an extra $2k. This meant that she would make as much as I spent on tokens or more if she won. Perfect, I thought, "what great luck we have, now I can use a credit card to help"...nope! After this, more contests that of course had ever greater rewards, more money, win a car for "us", she was going to buy land for "us", ect. Eventually when things became hard, as I was always honest about financial and all things, she began to say she would pay me back. If I needed something, I could use her card, account....even sending me pictures of fake bank transfers that always failed. The crux de gras was to tell me she wanted to come to the university here, which meant a visa even in coronavirus times. Of course she needed to win more contests, and a final one to make sure she got paid before November 1st, the deadline to apply. I gave her the last I had, and told her I was relying on her to get it back to me fast, so I could pay my bills. A few days later, after she quit to "move to Belgium" for school (something planned I knew about), she ghosted me and blocked me on all forms of communication. Eventually I got her to email me, She admitted she had not applied, despite telling me twice she did, and I had an email from the university saying the same. Said she lost the money to taxes, but then posted photos of herself on vacation on her instagram, still living in Romania. Eventually I found evidence of more of the lies after I started thinking with my head instead of my heart. I will be paying for this life lesson for a long time.
Apparently she used her mothers death to get out of meeting like I talked about in the original post. She did give me her real name, address, phone #, mothers name other personal details, I have and had verified all these. I don't know why you would do that if you were trying to scam someone, but she did. I did what I should have done long ago when "dating" someone online from another country, I went to a background check company. Not much on it she had not already told me, but no civil citation and most disturbing I found was both parents were still alive. I had spent a lot of time and emotion helping her with that. I had found an old news article from a few years ago, when this first started, that said her and her boyfriend had blackmailed another girl with nude photos. I thought he was the ex. The guy got probation and a suspended sentence. I later found she had given me this guys phone number to "vote" for her in one of the contests. She even sent me photos of him and said he was an old "friend".
That's the short story. So I guess my warning is, no matter how much someone says they hate liars, are not fake, or even give you real personal information, there are some people out there that will mix as much truth, and maybe even real feelings, with lies to make the deception more real and play with your feelings and emotions. Part of me still wants to think she lied at the end because she was tired of ruining my life, she had said before she felt toxic to those she cared about. Maybe she was a pathological liar, didn't even know she was lying. Maybe someone else manipulated her into manipulating me. The gaslighting at the end though, telling me I had trust issues, makes that hard to believe now. I just worry other models from that studio (yes, I know its name) will try to use the same thing on other kind hearted and caring people. I have a recurring nightmare of her and others working together to see how much crazy things they can tell me and have me still be supportive. Yes, I'm seeing a trauma specialist.
In conclusion, any one in a similar situation, if something doesn't seem right or feels confusing, or if your here looking for validation for something....trust your instinct or ask more questions, because by the end you may not be able to get the answers.