Mistaking camsites for dating sites?

[LaceyRoyce]

I har a joke "marriage" giant tip on my tip menu. (I was publically already married at the time) Had a regular member legitimately ask me if I could divorce my husband, marry this member and "date" the member but continue to also date my now ex husband and all 3 of us could move to nz (where i have citizenship) and live in a weird poly family dynamic.

... he was not joking but pretended he was when I explained the tip was a joke.

 

[yummybrownfox]

I har a joke "marriage" giant tip on my tip menu. (I was publically already married at the time) Had a regular member legitimately ask me if I could divorce my husband, marry this member and "date" the member but continue to also date my now ex husband and all 3 of us could move to nz (where i have citizenship) and live in a weird poly family dynamic.

... he was not joking but pretended he was when I explained the tip was a joke.

This makes me think of when you turn down a guy (who can't handle rejection), and then he says "That's okay. I don't want your ugly-ass anyway." Lol. Suuure...

 

[mika_kedi]

I walked in on the tail end of a conversation once where a model was telling a member that she was a webcam model and not a prostitute. The fact that she had to even explain that at all was concerning.

Adding to what @Lilly_____ already told you. There's quite a lot of escorts who are online SWers as well. Or people doing one kind of SW and then moving on to another. There's no hierarchy of "good" and "bad" kinds of sex work like your comments seems to suggest (I remember you commenting about this exacts situation once or twice before and I stopped myself from responding before, but you seem to find it really important to tell everyone that "your model friend" would never *gasp* and I'm really done reading about it). The point is they are all conducted in different spaces and these spaces have different rules you should follow.

Dating sites are completely separate things from all those places of business.

Your favorite cam model doesn't want to date you, the escort you see doesn't want to date you, the stripper giving you a dance doesn't want to date you, the masseuse giving you a body to body massage doesn't want to date you and the Domme whipping your ass, you guessed it, doesn't want to date you.

 

[misterical]

Adding to what @Lilly_____ already told you. There's quite a lot of escorts who are online SWers as well. Or people doing one kind of SW and then moving on to another. There's no hierarchy of "good" and "bad" kinds of sex work like your comments seems to suggest (I remember you commenting about this exacts situation once or twice before and I stopped myself from responding before, but you seem to find it really important to tell everyone that "your model friend" would never *gasp* and I'm really done reading about it). The point is they are all conducted in different spaces and these spaces have different rules you should follow.

Dating sites are completely separate things from all those places of business.

Your favorite cam model doesn't want to date you, the escort you see doesn't want to date you, the stripper giving you a dance doesn't want to date you, the masseuse giving you a body to body massage doesn't want to date you and the Domme whipping your ass, you guessed it, doesn't want to date you.

Firstly, this was a random model, not my friend. Secondly, see my later post clarifying that I was quoting the model verbatim, not choosing my own terminology in order to offend. I'm not passing judgement on any kind of sex work and certainly not suggesting there is a hierarchy but this model clearly felt the need to make it clear that she was not there for that purpose.

 

[mika_kedi]

Firstly, this was a random model, not my friend. Secondly, see my later post clarifying that I was quoting the model verbatim, not choosing my own terminology in order to offend. I'm not passing judgement on any kind of sex work and certainly not suggesting there is a hierarchy but this model clearly felt the need to make it clear that she was not there for that purpose.

Firstly, okay, random model, you still felt the need to bring it up multiple times. Secondly, just because someone says an offensive word doesn't mean you have to quote them verbatim. It might not have been your intention to be offensive and suggest a hierarchy but it did come out this way. More that once.

No one who has a single working brain cell is there for that purpose. That was my point. Because it's against the rules and etiquette of cam sites to talk about in person meetings. So models who do both online and in person work still don't talk about in person work on cam sites.

 

[misterical]

Firstly, okay, random model, you still felt the need to bring it up multiple times. Secondly, just because someone says an offensive word doesn't mean you have to quote them verbatim. It might not have been your intention to be offensive and suggest a hierarchy but it did come out this way. More that once.

No one who has a single working brain cell is there for that purpose. That was my point. Because it's against the rules and etiquette of cam sites to talk about in person meetings. So models who do both online and in person work still don't talk about in person work on cam sites.

I'm not sure of your point. I brought it up once. The only reason I'm still discussing my earlier post is because you replied. I've not got time to go through my nearly 700 posts on here but I'm pretty sure this is the first time I've discussed any kind of crossover in types of sex work. I've no doubt been involved in discussions about guys wanting to meet and pursue romantic relationships but that's it as far as I'm aware.

 

[mika_kedi]

I'm not sure of your point. I brought it up once. The only reason I'm still discussing my earlier post is because you replied. I've not got time to go through my nearly 700 posts on here but I'm pretty sure this is the first time I've discussed any kind of crossover in types of sex work. I've no doubt been involved in discussions about guys wanting to meet and pursue romantic relationships but that's it as far as I'm aware.

I'm sorry, you're right. I confused you with another member and with a bit different story about his model friend in which he did very strongly implied that being an escort is something bad. I don't want to derail the thread further by quoting his words especially since I don't think he was active in this thread here, so I just wanted to apologise for misdirecting my frustration stemmed from someone else's past comments at you.

 

[misterical]

I'm sorry, you're right. I confused you with another member and with a bit different story about his model friend in which he did very strongly implied that being an escort is something bad. I don't want to derail the thread further by quoting his words especially since I don't think he was active in this thread here, so I just wanted to apologise for misdirecting my frustration stemmed from someone else's past comments at you.

No worries. These things happen. Lots of people and lots of posts.

 

[ArcticKitty]

Totally tangenital rant here: In the US, which is backward and has fucked up laws that vary by state, the difference between an escort and prostitute isn't just the nature or style of services, it's about trying to avoid police attention and criminal charges. If I'm offering my time for money, that's escorting. If I'm offering sex for money, that's prostitution. If I'm providing my time and companionship as a consenting adult, that's the questionable part or gray area.

But what's really wrong is that these moralistic laws hurt Jane Q. Public too. For example, even in California until very recently, having condoms in your purse was circumstantial evidence for prostitution.

 

[CallMeMaria]

It happens occasionally. I tend to go along with it and start making ridiculous requests straigh away.. "Yay - as my new hubby, you will pay for everything right? I want a honeymoon, 100 000 dollars, you send that now and I get booking?! Hawai? Barbados? Both?! Yay so exciting!"

Pretty soon they vanish. I guess they just were not that into me.

 

[Hiunds]

what percentage of these guys do you reckon are serious vs trying to love bomb the model but are flirting (badly)?

 

[Vixxen81]

what percentage of these guys do you reckon are serious vs trying to love bomb the model but are flirting (badly)?

Makes no difference what their actual intent is

 

[Hiunds]

Makes no difference what their actual intent is

totally both are annoying and shouldn't happen. But it might make a difference concerning the mental state of the user

 

[RuthStrawberryblonde]

'This isn't a dating site'
'It's against the rules to talk about meeting or exchange contact details, privates, messages and streams are all monitored

Both go to statements I use when streaming.

Some reply 'Rules are made to be broken' to which I say 'I like it here, why would you put that at risk', if they continue I then advise I don't want them in my room.

I suspect some of the proposals are part of the wanking, interaction fantasy. I am also fairly sure other performers re familiar with the 'would you wear that in public/in a bar/what would you do if you saw me in a bar?'. It's very difficult and often inappropriate, not to mention impractical to wear stilettos and flimsy dresses in my immediate local. I also do not hang around bars, once again inappropriate and impractical for many reasons. I know however this can be a genuine fantasy, just depends on the attitude and communication.

I do utterly draw the line at asking me to cheat on my husband, or for specifics about my personal life.

 

[yummybrownfox]

what percentage of these guys do you reckon are serious vs trying to love bomb the model but are flirting (badly)?

It's also annoying when members put models on the spot like that in public chat while we're trying to work, because it's gonna give other members ideas to also grill us with "Well would you _____?" questions. We spend enough time telling people that this is VIRTUAL ONLY.

I have this new guy on Phrendly who said that I "check all of his boxes," and wants to get to know me outside of there. I told him right off the bat that I'm flattered, but I don't meet in person...and this is virtual only. I thought that was gonna make him give up on me, and go spend his money elsewhere. But even after I was honest with him, I got $192 from him in one day...and then $40 another day...and then another $40 last night. I'm not sure how much longer I'll be able to enjoy that before he decides Fuck this, I'm not gonna keep spending money on this chick who I can't convince to meet IRL. He hasn't brought it up at all since that first night, which is great. But I'm wondering if he's only continuing calls with me because he's trying to change my mind and win me over...or if he really is content with just doing phone or video calls. I'm just gonna keep enjoying it while I can while maintaining my "This is virtual only" stance (when asked).

 

[Hiunds]

It's also annoying when members put models on the spot like that in public chat while we're trying to work, because it's gonna give other members ideas to also grill us with "Well would you _____?" questions. We spend enough time telling people that this is VIRTUAL ONLY.

I have this new guy on Phrendly who said that I "check all of his boxes," and wants to get to know me outside of there. I told him right off the bat that I'm flattered, but I don't meet in person...and this is virtual only. I thought that was gonna make him give up on me, and go spend his money elsewhere. But even after I was honest with him, I got $192 from him in one day...and then $40 another day...and then another $40 last night. I'm not sure how much longer I'll be able to enjoy that before he decides Fuck this, I'm not gonna keep spending money on this chick who I can't convince to meet IRL. He hasn't brought it up at all since that first night, which is great. But I'm wondering if he's only continuing calls with me because he's trying to change my mind and win me over...or if he really is content with just doing phone or video calls. I'm just gonna keep enjoying it while I can while maintaining my "This is virtual only" stance (when asked).

sounds like the smart way to go. Hopefully he just "shot his shot" and now has settled in to the way the interactions are supposed to run

 

[AudriTwo]

You know whats also annoying. Is when they say "cant blame me for shooting my shot"

Yes i can. Now i see you differently and now dont like you.

 

[Vixxen81]

You know whats also annoying. Is when they say "cant blame me for shooting my shot"

Yes i can. Now i see you differently and now dont like you.

Soooooo much this!!!

 

[MarieElise]

I wish some of them would just shut up, get to jerking off and shoot their literal shot. Then get on with their days. Why so difficult?

 

[Hiunds]

"shoot their literal shot." that is Gold

 

[Vixxen81]

I wish some of them would just shut up, get to jerking off and shoot their literal shot. Then get on with their days. Why so difficult?

Had an actual broadcaster come into the room just as I logged in and started with the 20 Questions Game and then got snotty with me when I demanded a tip. Bitch you know how this works, get out of my room! So I escorted them out via the ban button.

 

[MarieElise]

Had an actual broadcaster come into the room just as I logged in and started with the 20 Questions Game and then got snotty with me when I demanded a tip. Bitch you know how this works, get out of my room! So I escorted them out via the ban button.

Sometimes other broadcasters can be the worst. A lot of them that do stuff like that aren’t for real and professional. They have to be hobby wankers. When they come in talking like that and no tips, I ban too. Don’t care who they are … or who they think they are.

 

[Vixxen81]

Sometimes other broadcasters can be the worst. A lot of them that do stuff like that aren’t for real and professional. They have to be hobby wankers. When they come in talking like that and no tips, I ban too. Don’t care who they are

Battles on all sides. It's exhausting.

 

[MarieElise]

Battles on all sides. It's exhausting.

Exactly. True words right there.

 

[AudriTwo]

I wish some of them would just shut up, get to jerking off and shoot their literal shot. Then get on with their days. Why so difficult?

The only time masturbating wont make things awkward.

 

[EasternPromis]

Yes, hence I don’t really believe in “love cons” because all this pitiful “lonely middle aged men” just full of crap. Somehow they believe that young hot tight ass perky boobs 20 y.o should love them unconditionally for their personality and not their wallet.
They could get on real dating site and find loving woman of their age, from their area/culture and have meaningful relationships but no, these women have “baggage” of children/divorce, have saggy boobs and ass.
Only appeal of this 20 y.o from 3rd world country is that they young and hot, otherwise these men literally have nothing in common with them, and often even complain that they can’t communicate properly without translator. They aren’t that innocent. I think it’s just right that girls taking the most of it while it lasts.

 

[misterical]

Yes, hence I don’t really believe in “love cons” because all this pitiful “lonely middle aged men” just full of crap. Somehow they believe that young hot tight ass perky boobs 20 y.o should love them unconditionally for their personality and not their wallet.
They could get on real dating site and find loving woman of their age, from their area/culture and have meaningful relationships but no, these women have “baggage” of children/divorce, have saggy boobs and ass.
Only appeal of this 20 y.o from 3rd world country is that they young and hot, otherwise these men literally have nothing in common with them, and often even complain that they can’t communicate properly without translator. They aren’t that innocent. I think it’s just right that girls taking the most of it while it lasts.

Obviously many a middle aged man pursues younger models, however having read countless posts (both here and on places like Reddit) I never fail to be amazed by how many younger guys fall for love cons as well. I'd argue that they are possibly a softer touch because the idea of a model falling in love with someone close to their own age seems perfectly reasonable to these guys. It's baffling for sure.

 

[EasternPromis]

Obviously many a middle aged man pursues younger models, however having read countless posts (both here and on places like Reddit) I never fail to be amazed by how many younger guys fall for love cons as well. I'd argue that they are possibly a softer touch because the idea of a model falling in love with someone close to their own age seems perfectly reasonable to these guys. It's baffling for sure.

Honestly I’m not buying it. In my opinion true love con is when Nigerian dude steals pictures of other men/women, buys Tinder Gold and picks location in well developed country, makes matches on Tinder with women/men and chats as if he’s local person trying to get something out of it.


I run Onlyfans page and promote on Instagram and Tik Tok so it’s where my customers see me for the first time, then subscribe and some just ASKING for it. I have younger guys (late 20s- early 30s) who message me every day that they love me or thinking of me helps their day to go by, calling me their wife etc, some “can’t see” my b/g content or it ruins it for them etc. I swear, my DMs is just cringe and most dreadful part of my job. Mind you I’m not the most sociable, I aim to answer to each person 1 time in 24 h unless they’re tipping.
They just begging to be “loved conned” but what will happen next - I’d go along with their bs if they pay me well, then at some point they will stop paying and so my “love” (service) - stops. They will go all around crying and whining on the internet?

 

[EasternPromis]

The problem is that younger men these days only seeing edited women on social media, exceptionally beautiful popular women and fake sex in porn.

They do not want a regular woman who’s also becoming more and more demanding because women no longer need men to survive so only wanting real good men.
Hence men go on the internet seeking whatever they can find to satisfy their need for intimacy because they don’t want to put lots of effort into getting regular woman who doesn’t look nearly as good as internet women and doesn’t do so many “tricks” in sex and is not a men pleaser as women used to be.

 

[Lilly_____]

The problem is that younger men these days only seeing edited women on social media, exceptionally beautiful popular women and fake sex in porn.

They do not want a regular woman who’s also becoming more and more demanding because women no longer need men to survive so only wanting real good men.
Hence men go on the internet seeking whatever they can find to satisfy their need for intimacy because they don’t want to put lots of effort into getting regular woman who doesn’t look nearly as good as internet women and doesn’t do so many “tricks” in sex and is not a men pleaser as women used to be.

Your words are always wisdom gems.

They also think what, that we do anal and upside down throatfuck on a daily basis with full make up on and see through lingerie? They don't stop to think that we also wear old baggy clothes, look tired af, complain that the dishes aren't washed.... Even pretty internet women aren't like that. We say it over and over, it's a fantasy.

And don't even come to me with that "oh but girls in tshirts and no makeup are the prettiest", "i love casual looking girls" bullshit because those are also made up to SEEM LIKE they're all relaxed there. They are wearing as much make up and that "old t-shirt" was well thought through. Those guys want a relationship with something that doesn't exist anywhere, even with "perfect" internet girls.