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Is this morally right?

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I was thinking of HIV. If a condom splits in a healthy monogamous relationship, you only have to worry about the morning after pill. If promiscuity is at play then there's more chance of unintentionally contracting HIV. The reason for the promiscuity is irrelevant.

Waking up to the rampant whorephobia in this thread is so disheartening.

Camgirls are sexworkers too. We pay our bills by giving people orgasms, which fits us nicely under the sex worker umbrella. Just like porn stars, just like phone sex operators, just like full service sex workers or escorts. No matter how we interact with our regulars, whether it be via a physical or digital connection, we are all equal to each other. And here on ACF, we have sex workers of ALL types. Which means we don't take kindly to people coming here and showing disdain and mockery for our full-service brothers and sisters.

There are full service sex workers on this forum. You have spoken with some, several times. They are beautiful, brilliant, amazing people who fill my heart with awe because of their kindness, their willingness to help others, their passion and their strength. They aren't disease-ridden creatures - they are human beings with feelings, who do a job just like you and are worthy of human decency and respect. I always find it so funny that in my experience, the kindest people in the WORLD have been sex workers. But the cruelest? The ones who think that an entire group of strangers are worthy of being mocked, that they deserve to be the butt of jokes because *surely* they are diseased and disgusting... It's often the non-sex workers who are surprisingly uneducated about sex as a whole. This ignorance isn't just annoying to deal with. But whorephobic mentality is what makes sex workers vulnerable in the first place. We face this kind of stigma All. The. Time. And it's effing exhausting.

And before you claim again that it was just a joke.... I want you to know that the same people who think all sex workers must carry disease are often the same people who think that sex workers are less than human, though often they think this on a subconscious level. And thus, sex workers lose their children, their jobs, their families. They are thrown in jail. A few even lose their lives to psychos who think they are disposable - then they lose their names and their humanity in headlines, reduced to just a job. Making whorephobic jokes and assumptions isn't cute. It's ignorant and heart-breaking, and it helps to create, spread, and normalize the stigma we face every single day. I mean... That should be fairly obvious, right? Everyone knows that racist jokes help spread a culture where racism flourishes. Jokes about rape normalize the existence of rape and dismiss trauma as giggle-fodder. So it shouldn't be surprising to realize that whorephobic and slut-shaming jokes help spread the attitude that all sex workers are diseased and less than human, not worthy of respect and human decency. You might find it absolutely hilarious or think it's no big deal, but to those of us who have to face such attitudes every day, who have suffered personal losses because of it... We aren't really laughing.

And speaking of diseases... There are so many human beings who have STIs. They are incredibly common and I know for a fact that you've interacted with several people who have had one. Not because they are sex workers but because a majority of human beings have or have had one in the past. It's strange because every single person I know who has received an STI received it from a monogamous partner who thought they were free of STIs. Civilian people don't take sex-health as seriously - assuming that only "whores" and "sluts" need to be careful or tested. I know SO MANY people who have never had an STI test or who have only done it once or twice in their entire lives, and trust their partners' word that they are STI-free. But none of them are sex workers. The sex workers I know are INCREDIBLY thorough about sex-safety. They get tested and tested often, they take PREP, they are firm believers in condoms, and they are educated on the risk factors that facilitate the spread of STIs. If I had to trust my sexual health to any partner - I'd choose a sex worker over a non-sex worker vanilla dude any day. But that doesn't change the very simple fact: STIs don't make a person "dirty". They don't make anyone less than and fighting an STI doesn't mean anyone deserves to be mocked and shamed. We don't shame people for getting the cold, the flu - we don't shame people who get chicken pox. So it's incredibly silly to shame people for catching viruses and bacteria that are surprisingly common.

Sex worker or not, STI or not, no one deserves to have to face shame and stigma, to be the butt of jokes, especially in a corner of the internet where sex workers of all types are accepted and supported. So before you throw around horrible jokes like they are normal, remember who you are speaking to. Would you say demeaning jokes like that to the faces of full-service sex workers in person? Or look someone in the eyes to make fun of a disease that has brought them pain and shame and heartache? Probably not. But you did that here. You don't know who's a FSSW or not, just like you don't know who has an STI or not. And that's true both in the real world AND the internet. Something to keep in mind the next time.

Personally, I'd rather judge someone based on how they treat others (esp, whether they treat marginalized communities with decency and respect - or use them as the subject of jokes meant to mock & spread shame). Not on the way they pay their bills or any illnesses they may be fighting.
 
As much as we all like to rail against the stigma, the reality is that this woman isn't going to fuck her friend for money and then fall into our welcoming arms. Full service sex work in America (is she American?) is illegal, stigmatized and getting more dangerous as we speak. If I'm going in on a joint venture that is any of those things, I'm not doing it with someone who is suicidal. When you're in that mindset (and I've tried a few times myself), you're not valuing your body or your future. That is not someone I want to put in a position to be hurt, and also not someone I want to open my own self up to. It is immoral to assist someone who feels that you are a friend in making life more dangerous when you know they aren't thinking about their future clearly. Further, it's stupid for your own well being.
 
Just an update on this. Having spoken to a few people about it I decided not to go through with it. I just thought it wasn't worth the risk at the end of the day. I didn't want her feeling bad about it further down the line. Not sure if she is at the moment, but she was fragile in the past, and so I thought this was the best decision. I'm continuing to support her as a friend & have lent her more money whenever I've been able to. Something I hadn't mentioned was that she has four kids, so she definately needs the help given she hasn't been working. She told me the other week that she's going to be starting a new job. Am hoping she was able to start it & her depression hasn't hit again, stopping her from doing it. Sent her a msg the other day asking how she was & how the new job is going. But she hasn't repiled yet. I sent it the night before she was due to pay an installment of the money she's borrowed. I'm worried she might think I sent it to indirectly mention the payment. But I really wasn't, and will be texting her to tell her there's no rush to pay so she doesn't stress about it if she is. But my mum's view is that I don't need to send the text & that she won't be stressed about it, as she's got other stuff going on in her life like her kids. She says I shouldn't text her to say there's no rush. Because she needs to learn to be responsible.
 
Ok so I'm really stuck on a moral dillema at the moment. I recentley got back in touch with an old female friend of mine through facebook that I knew from when we were in our teens. We'd gotten in touch a few years earlier too, but not properly. This time we began talking on facebook messenger & then on whatsapp. She began telling me about the troubles she's been having. After a day or so of talking she asked if she could borrow some money. I lent her the money & again some more some days later. While we talked she made it clear she wasn't ready for a relationship because she just got out of one. And me & her have history, as she once tried to ask me out years back but I got weirded out & kinda stopped her from asking. Anyway so I thought seeing how she isn't ready for a reltionship maybe we could be intimate via text, over the phone etc. I asked her this on whatsapp & didn't hear back from her until yeaterday. She said she wasn't offended at all & explained that the reason she hadn't been in touch was because she'd been given these new meds for depression & they'd knocked her side-ways. She also told me that she came really, really close to killing herself on xmas day. Shortly after she suggested something to me. She suggested that seeing how she can't work at the moment & needs money & I've certain needs then I could give her money in exchange for being intimate. She said that she feels 100% comfy with me, wants to give me pleasure & that this way she wouldn't feel bad about getting money from me.

I was over the moon about this, as I've had nothing but bad luck with women over the years & it's been 2 or 3 years since I was last intimate with a woman. But having talked this over with my mum & my cousin, they both feel that this isn't morally right due to what she's been through & that afterwards she might feel bad about herself for doing this. But I see it as two friends helping each other out. I really don't know what to do. I've checked with her a couple times to make sure she's definately cool with it & she's said yes. But at the same time I'm thinking she might not be thinking straight due to what she's gone through.
I suggest not lending her any money at all, Depression is a very serious thing , Me personally i think your an Wolf preying off her mental illness, Not once have you mentioned what could i do to get her help !!! Think with your heart not your smaller head
 
Just an update on this. Having spoken to a few people about it I decided not to go through with it. I just thought it wasn't worth the risk at the end of the day. I didn't want her feeling bad about it further down the line. Not sure if she is at the moment, but she was fragile in the past, and so I thought this was the best decision. I'm continuing to support her as a friend & have lent her more money whenever I've been able to. Something I hadn't mentioned was that she has four kids, so she definately needs the help given she hasn't been working. She told me the other week that she's going to be starting a new job. Am hoping she was able to start it & her depression hasn't hit again, stopping her from doing it. Sent her a msg the other day asking how she was & how the new job is going. But she hasn't repiled yet. I sent it the night before she was due to pay an installment of the money she's borrowed. I'm worried she might think I sent it to indirectly mention the payment. But I really wasn't, and will be texting her to tell her there's no rush to pay so she doesn't stress about it if she is. But my mum's view is that I don't need to send the text & that she won't be stressed about it, as she's got other stuff going on in her life like her kids. She says I shouldn't text her to say there's no rush. Because she needs to learn to be responsible.

Glad you didn't take her up on the offer. It was the right thing to do...or not to do, I guess. Given her mental state and dire circumstances, seems like it clearly would have been sexual exploitation.

If you truly care about her - her the person, not her the sex source - you might want to help her connect with community resources and mental health services that provide long-term solutions for people in her situation. It would be a lot more helpful than loaning her money she can't pay back.
 
She does sound desperate and mentally confused. She proposed sex for money on the fly and obviously isn't a professional sex worker.

She doesn't know what she's doing and is compromised.

Red flags guy.

Can't comment further as I've never been a 'John'.
 
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