I like a model but am I being cat fished?

[RahulMohite]

I’ve been visiting cam girls for over three year now. I’ve had many friendships and I wish I had known of this earlier.

But there was this one cam girl who I had a very big crush on. We spoke for about three months and I was very vocal about being crazy for her. She seemed to like me too.
I’m quite shy and I shut down easily but we started exchanging pictures. We finally moved away from the strip platform and started speaking on Instagram. It got pretty intense with her sharing a lot about her life. I did too. But at some point I felt as though I was being catfished. A few messages were in the third person. She’s from Colombia and uses a translator so I don’t know if that has a role to play.

I got freaked out and disabled my account for a month. It took me another month to gather the courage try talk to her again.

She was pretty mad at me and it was difficult for me to bring up my cat fish suspicions. I wanted to know if it is common.

Where models outsource the talking bits to a friend and interact with the client only during shows.

Hope my question makes sense.

 

[MarieElise]

I’ve been visiting cam girls for over three year now. I’ve had many friendships and I wish I had known of this earlier.

But there was this one cam girl who I had a very big crush on. We spoke for about three months and I was very vocal about being crazy for her. She seemed to like me too.
I’m quite shy and I shut down easily but we started exchanging pictures. We finally moved away from the strip platform and started speaking on Instagram. It got pretty intense with her sharing a lot about her life. I did too. But at some point I felt as though I was being catfished. A few messages were in the third person. She’s from Colombia and uses a translator so I don’t know if that has a role to play.

I got freaked out and disabled my account for a month. It took me another month to gather the courage try talk to her again.

She was pretty mad at me and it was difficult for me to bring up my cat fish suspicions. I wanted to know if it is common.

Where models outsource the talking bits to a friend and interact with the client only during shows.

Hope my question makes sense.

You sound very anxious. If you have this much doubt in your mind already, it points one way for you (in my opinion). But I could totally be missing something here?

 

[RainForest]

What exactly do you want from this relationship? Girlfriend? Wife? 15 minutes of fame on the local news?

 

[Vixxen81]

Typical over thinking. Just tip. If you guys wouldn't ask so many fucking questions trying to vet us for your money none of us would have to reach that deep to keep you engaged.

 

[RahulMohite]

You sound very anxious. If you have this much doubt in your mind already, it points one way for you (in my opinion). But I could totally be missing something here?

That is a great answer. But why write off someone who could be genuine because of that anxiety?

 

[RahulMohite]

What exactly do you want from this relationship? Girlfriend? Wife? 15 minutes of fame on the local news?

I do sense the sarcasm but I’ll answer. I definitely wanted her to be my girlfriend but the logistics of it all drove me insane. Being a friend who can support her is what I’m looking for.

 

[RahulMohite]

Typical over thinking. Just tip. If you guys wouldn't ask so many fucking questions trying to vet us for your money none of us would have to reach that deep to keep you engaged.

I agree I’m overthinking @Vixxen81 which is why I’m on this forum. My friends look down on my “extracurricular activities on the internet” so I’ve bottled this up inside.

I did tip her regularly when we spoke. And I tipped her because I cared for her. No strip requests. Just an acknowledgement that it made a difference in her life. I became a part of her Fan Club as well.

She barely posts anything there but it felt nice to support her.

I agree that it’s not easy to keep someone engaged. But that wasn’t the case with her. In fact, she’d complain that I typed too slow. I learned so much about her life and I’m grateful that I could experience the emotional intimacy that I received.

She shared many details of her life. I acknowledge that effort. But she works in a studio and multiple people would have access to her account.

My hesitation is that it might be her manager or a friend who’s having these deep conversations with me.

But If I’m making a financial and emotional investment in someone, I’d like it to be real.

Does the scenario above happen in the industry?

The whole situation is bothersome.
I feel like her and I have both lost a good opportunity to build on a mutually beneficial relationship.

 

[cbhours]

A few messages were in the third person. She’s from Colombia and uses a translator so I don’t know if that has a role to play.

Where models outsource the talking bits to a friend and interact with the client only during shows.

They aren't going to make that mistake, I have never once seen a studio monitor accidentally start typing in third person. It's far more likely a translation issue, even more so if they are using a translator built into the keyboard because many of those don't properly use the context of the whole message. (Or maybe that's just sometimes based on connection issues)

 

[AudriTwo]

I mean I'd be annoyed too if a user i thought i was on good terms with accused me of trying to catfish him after not speaking for like a month. Ive had members been catfished and scammed in the past. Its not a good feeling and can fuck with your reputation.

Also how the fuck would she be catfishing you? Like its not her messaging? As in a boyfriend, assistant, or studio manager? Even if that is the case, camming is a fantasy driven industry. In reality you arent talking to real person, instead a persona.

 

[yummybrownfox]

Typical over thinking. Just tip. If you guys wouldn't ask so many fucking questions trying to vet us for your money none of us would have to reach that deep to keep you engaged.

“Can you stand and do a twirl?”
“Can you show us what you’re working with?”
“What’s the biggest cock you’ve had?”
“How long have you been doing this?”


For them to decide whether or not we’re worth their 1-token tips. Lol. Give me a break.

 

[NotYou]

They aren't going to make that mistake, I have never once seen a studio monitor accidentally start typing in third person. It's far more likely a translation issue, even more so if they are using a translator built into the keyboard because many of those don't properly use the context of the whole message. (Or maybe that's just sometimes based on connection issues)

I have seen managers/admins/monitors talk in the third person plenty of times, especially when they send out a mass PM somewhere like Srtipchat.
I am not saying it's overly common, and most models can brush it off as a translation error, and honestly, I doubt most people even notice it themselves, but it definitely does happen "plenty enough" (I can't give stats so don't ask, I don't keep track )

 

[Vixxen81]

“Can you stand and do a twirl?”
“Can you show us what you’re working with?”
“What’s the biggest cock you’ve had?”
“How long have you been doing this?”


For them to decide whether or not we’re worth their 1-token tips. Lol. Give me a break.

Nit picked to death some nights. It's exhausting. We have menus for a reason, but we've practically beat this horse into oblivion at this point.

 

[Vixxen81]

I agree I’m overthinking @Vixxen81 which is why I’m on this forum. My friends look down on my “extracurricular activities on the internet” so I’ve bottled this up inside.

I did tip her regularly when we spoke. And I tipped her because I cared for her. No strip requests. Just an acknowledgement that it made a difference in her life. I became a part of her Fan Club as well.

She barely posts anything there but it felt nice to support her.

I agree that it’s not easy to keep someone engaged. But that wasn’t the case with her. In fact, she’d complain that I typed too slow. I learned so much about her life and I’m grateful that I could experience the emotional intimacy that I received.

She shared many details of her life. I acknowledge that effort. But she works in a studio and multiple people would have access to her account.

My hesitation is that it might be her manager or a friend who’s having these deep conversations with me.

But If I’m making a financial and emotional investment in someone, I’d like it to be real.

Does the scenario above happen in the industry?

The whole situation is bothersome.
I feel like her and I have both lost a good opportunity to build on a mutually beneficial relationship.

She's giving you the girlfriend experience since you won't tip to get her naked and she has no other choice but to engage you in that way to separate you from your tokens.

Now, that said, it doesn't mean the conversations aren't heartfelt and real.

Falling for cam models is easy, but it's also a really, really bad idea. You ghosting her did more damage than anything else.

 

[MarieElise]

That is a great answer. But why write off someone who could be genuine because of that anxiety?

Because you don’t know them and it’s early days. Why not write them off? If you have doubts so big so early on it doesn’t sound healthy to me, or like there’s any genuine strong connection here.

Having to go to a forum of strangers to put a new “friend” under such a microscope seems weird. She’s more than likely just trying to do her job.

 

[misterical]

They aren't going to make that mistake, I have never once seen a studio monitor accidentally start typing in third person. It's far more likely a translation issue, even more so if they are using a translator built into the keyboard because many of those don't properly use the context of the whole message. (Or maybe that's just sometimes based on connection issues)

Likely this. I've seen it a lot when using the keyboard translator. It often confuses genders and can replace "I" with "they".

 

[HeadyRaven]

I do sense the sarcasm but I’ll answer. I definitely wanted her to be my girlfriend but the logistics of it all drove me insane. Being a friend who can support her is what I’m looking for.

You mentioned fear of being catfished, which I guess means fear that some of her communications are not real or that someone else was ghost-writing some of them. I think the much higher probability is that she's simply trying to earn money, under the guise of friendship. Based on the comments of numerous others on this site, and my own experiences, the idea that someone is truly your friend when you also happen to be paying them to talk to you is a very dubious concept.

Wouldn't you rather have a friend that likes you purely for you - no financial transactions involved?

I like the advice I saw here once, a long time ago: Just keep communicating, but stop all private sessions, presents, and any other payments. Reassess after a few months. You'll definitely know how sincere she is.

 

[Katandsam]

I won’t comment on anything here other than to say that yes, Google translate will often change phrases to third person when translation from Spanish to English.

 

[LilyLaughing]

*phew* that was a lot of story to get to.... are you asking if it's common for cam models to have other people chat for them? Yes, it is VERY common with studio models and mostly uncommon with independents. Not enough info here to know who was typing to you but ... just remember the feeling of having a crush is akin to being legally insane with how it messes with your brain chemicals, so maybe try to focus on yourself/slow your roll with crushes.

Also, this is not 'catfishing' - you have not been scammed or cheated out of anything other than your unrealistic hope of being the boyfriend of a cam model you enjoy.

 

[CamBB]

I mean I'd be annoyed too if a user i thought i was on good terms with accused me of trying to catfish him after not speaking for like a month. Ive had members been catfished and scammed in the past. Its not a good feeling and can fuck with your reputation.

Also how the fuck would she be catfishing you? Like its not her messaging? As in a boyfriend, assistant, or studio manager? Even if that is the case, camming is a fantasy driven industry. In reality you arent talking to real person, instead a persona.

Well said. Sometimes I think viewers get too caught up in things and turn a fun thing into a too serious-of-a-thing.