Fiance wants to start camming...

[missrosexox]

Bookmarking this thread so I can read it later and feel better the next time I'm sad about being single. Cuz wow.

Also I'm fucking tired of people saying that you shouldn't do sex work if it's "just" for the money. That's what a job is, for god's sake. Every single person in the world works "just" so they can clothe, feed, and shelter themselves. Stop acting like sex workers need some nobler, higher cause to justify their work because apparently refusing to live in poverty isn't a ~*good enough*~ reason to hustle.

 

[PlayboyMegan]

Bookmarking this thread so I can read it later and feel better the next time I'm sad about being single. Cuz wow.

Also I'm fucking tired of people saying that you shouldn't do sex work if it's "just" for the money. That's what a job is, for god's sake. Every single person in the world works "just" so they can clothe, feed, and shelter themselves. Stop acting like sex workers need some nobler, higher cause to justify their work because apparently refusing to live in poverty isn't a ~*good enough*~ reason to hustle.

Sex work IS different than other work. Period. If you cannot see those differences, I cannot possibly change your mind about that. Let me ask you this, though. What's more psychologically damaging? Being forced into prostitution or being forced to work at mcdonalds??? Prostitution. It's common sense (or suppose to be). Oh, but I thought you said they were the same thing. Let me put this clearly for you, they're not. She is going to be a mother. She needs to do everything in her power to be mentally fit. I can promise you she will walk away with mental issues if she dislikes sex work as much as her boyfriend says she does. You shouldn't do something that is going to possibly give you psychological damage just for money. There are too many other options out there. There is a LOT of support in this world. I grew up on soup kitchens and welfare and I was perfectly fine. Never once hungry.

 

[PlayboyMegan]

OP, have you ever considered moving? I know it's expensive to move, but if you can come up with the money, I'd suggest Las Vegas. It's easy to get a job there, you can make bank being a card dealer, she can make even more bank being a cocktail waitress, there's a TON of charities out there, welfare is good, AND it's extremely cheap to live there. ($900/m for a gorgeous 2 bedroom)

 

[mynameisbob84]

I've touched on the subject of her going to other sites and she doesn't really want to, her main concern is showing her face, she doesn't want to at all. And she does NOT enjoy this line of work, her words exactly are I want to do this because I can make a large amount of money very quickly and not work very hard for it. I disagree with that, she will work hard, just not physically. I'll see if I can't pursuade her to join this forum. I have a large support from my family. Taking care of the baby is no problems at all. The big thing she is pushing for is I only have a 2 door car, and we will need a 4 door. That's why she wants to get back into camming, money for a car. I told her we have about 6 months left. I can help you get a decent job and we can get a decent car we can afford. If not my family has offered to just give me a nice minivan but she doesn't want to do that...

So...

Pros for your fiancé camming

She can pay for a car with two more doors than your current car (but likely less doors than the minivan)

Cons for your fiancé camming

She doesn't enjoy the work
You're uncomfortable with her camming
By the sounds of it she's underestimating the amount of effort she'll have to put in on cam to be able to buy a new car
She doesn't want to show her face on cam which suggests she wants to remain anonymous, which is a perfectly reasonable thing to wish for, but is decidedly at odds with the very public nature of camming

It seems like a pretty bad idea to me, but I'm obviously not in as good a position as you to assess the situation.

 

[missrosexox]

Bookmarking this thread so I can read it later and feel better the next time I'm sad about being single. Cuz wow.

Also I'm fucking tired of people saying that you shouldn't do sex work if it's "just" for the money. That's what a job is, for god's sake. Every single person in the world works "just" so they can clothe, feed, and shelter themselves. Stop acting like sex workers need some nobler, higher cause to justify their work because apparently refusing to live in poverty isn't a ~*good enough*~ reason to hustle.

Sex work IS different than other work. Period. If you cannot see those differences, I cannot possibly change your mind about that. Let me ask you this, though. What's more psychologically damaging? Being forced into prostitution or being forced to work at mcdonalds??? Prostitution. It's common sense (or suppose to be). Oh, but I thought you said they were the same thing. Let me put this clearly for you, they're not. She is going to be a mother. She needs to do everything in her power to be mentally fit. I can promise you she will walk away with mental issues if she dislikes sex work as much as her boyfriend says she does. You shouldn't do something that is going to possibly give you psychological damage just for money. There are too many other options out there. There is a LOT of support in this world. I grew up on soup kitchens and welfare and I was perfectly fine. Never once hungry.

Who the hell is talking about being forced into prostitution? Conflating human trafficking and consensual sex work is totally duplicitous and deliberately derailing, wtf are you even talking about.

 

[JickyJuly]

I agree with Bob. This is sounding like a horribly thought out plan that probably won't work out as well as she expects. The market for headless pregnant bodies that just sit there enjoying their easy job is not profitable. She shouldn't be wasting time like that or causing emotional stress over peanuts. She either needs to take the job seriously as a way to support her family or find something else. You can't support 3 people on 1 part time job. Get yourself to McDonalds and pick up a 2nd. If she's not showing and doesn't have any medical opposition, take her with you. Work until you're seeing double. It will be excellent practice for when your kid shows up. If she is showing, call your local health department and see what programs you can sign up for. WIC helps with nutrition during pregnancy and early childhood. If you wait until after your baby is born to figure out how you'll pay for its necessities, this will all be much more painful. The idea of your wife camming will be nothing in comparison.

 

[PlayboyMegan]

Bookmarking this thread so I can read it later and feel better the next time I'm sad about being single. Cuz wow.

Also I'm fucking tired of people saying that you shouldn't do sex work if it's "just" for the money. That's what a job is, for god's sake. Every single person in the world works "just" so they can clothe, feed, and shelter themselves. Stop acting like sex workers need some nobler, higher cause to justify their work because apparently refusing to live in poverty isn't a ~*good enough*~ reason to hustle.

Sex work IS different than other work. Period. If you cannot see those differences, I cannot possibly change your mind about that. Let me ask you this, though. What's more psychologically damaging? Being forced into prostitution or being forced to work at mcdonalds??? Prostitution. It's common sense (or suppose to be). Oh, but I thought you said they were the same thing. Let me put this clearly for you, they're not. She is going to be a mother. She needs to do everything in her power to be mentally fit. I can promise you she will walk away with mental issues if she dislikes sex work as much as her boyfriend says she does. You shouldn't do something that is going to possibly give you psychological damage just for money. There are too many other options out there. There is a LOT of support in this world. I grew up on soup kitchens and welfare and I was perfectly fine. Never once hungry.

Who the hell is talking about being forced into prostitution? Conflating human trafficking and consensual sex work is totally duplicitous and deliberately derailing, wtf are you even talking about.

I was using the example to show that doing sex work unwillingly OR disliking it and doing it anyways is more psychologically damaging than other 9-5 jobs. I thought that was pretty obvious, TBH.
What I gathered in your post is that you think 9-5 jobs are no different than sex work jobs. They are different. I don't think there is a (sane) psychologist in the world that would disagree with me.
I know a lot of girls that turned to sex work purely out of desperation and they are now FUCKED in the head. I know a lot of people that turned to McDonald's purely out of desperation. They may hate their lives, but they are not damaged like the sex workers are.

 

[AlexLady]

Every sexworker I know who has switched from retail claims the opposite; they insist that the freedom of sexwork is less mentally damaging than retail.


It is OK to do a job just for the money; that's what most people in the world do. Most people can go on and on about how they hate their job. It's normal.



This idea that sex is supposed to be mentally damaging to a person seems more like a cultural thing that people just accept/believe before they can make an opinion of their own similar to how people think sex is something "shameful."


(Not to throw off any fans who somehow read this someday; I _love_ camming, but I also support all of my co-workers regardless of their reason to work.)



Also MUCH respect to any mother who will work their asses off in any job rather than turn to welfare regardless of what they do.


----

Hi! I'm a sex worker. And I'm avoiding doing my homework so I'm going to go on a rant.
I've done many different kinds of sex work. I've been a cam girl, a porn performer, a professional sub, and a performer at a peep show (similar to a stripper). I've also been working in retail and food service simultaneously.

I get so frustrated at how I'm treated at work. It really gets to me. I find myself involuntarily crying once I get into my car to drive home. I hate how dehumanizing it is. People don't acknowledge me as a person. They think I'm less than them because of my job. Maybe they don't actively think that, but that's how they treat me. Oh, by the way, I'm talking about the food service job.

When I'm doing sex work I can refuse a customer. I can be rude to them if they are being rude to me. I don't have to apologize for their mistakes. I don't have to be sweet when they are being inappropriate. I negotiate my limits, and I only do what I feel comfortable doing. They don't get to order off the menu, I'm not going to bend over backwards for them.

I find it oppressive to work for minimum wage. I find it oppressive to act like the customer is always right. I find it dehumanizing to apologize for things that aren't my fault, like how much something costs or if you order something wrong and you want it remade the correct way. I find it dehumanizing to say "Hi! How are you?" and in response get "Yeah I just need a blah blah blah" and then have a customer go back to their cell phone conversation. I hate being reduced to a cash register.

 

[Fay_Galore]

The fact that you're posting on this forum should indicate you're somewhat open to it.

also, have you all considered his fiancee might say 'she doesn't like it very much' to try not hurt his feelings/ease it a bit since he doesnt seem too keen.

I dont really see why you post this here, she obviously has experience and knows she can no non-nude softcore stuff too instead. Also, we don't know you, your fiancee or your situation, this is really something between the two of you. I get why you wouldn't be cool with it, I get why you would be. it's really up to the two of you.

 

[PlayboyMegan]

Every sexworker I know who has switched from retail claims the opposite; they insist that the freedom of sexwork is less mentally damaging than retail.


It is OK to do a job just for the money; that's what most people in the world do. Most people can go on and on about how they hate their job. It's normal.



This idea that sex is supposed to be mentally damaging to a person seems more like a cultural thing that people just accept/believe before they can make an opinion of their own similar to how people think sex is something "shameful."


(Not to throw off any fans who somehow read this someday; I _love_ camming, but I also support all of my co-workers regardless of their reason to work.)



Also MUCH respect to any mother who will work their asses off in any job rather than turn to welfare regardless of what they do.


----

Hi! I'm a sex worker. And I'm avoiding doing my homework so I'm going to go on a rant.
I've done many different kinds of sex work. I've been a cam girl, a porn performer, a professional sub, and a performer at a peep show (similar to a stripper). I've also been working in retail and food service simultaneously.

I get so frustrated at how I'm treated at work. It really gets to me. I find myself involuntarily crying once I get into my car to drive home. I hate how dehumanizing it is. People don't acknowledge me as a person. They think I'm less than them because of my job. Maybe they don't actively think that, but that's how they treat me. Oh, by the way, I'm talking about the food service job.

When I'm doing sex work I can refuse a customer. I can be rude to them if they are being rude to me. I don't have to apologize for their mistakes. I don't have to be sweet when they are being inappropriate. I negotiate my limits, and I only do what I feel comfortable doing. They don't get to order off the menu, I'm not going to bend over backwards for them.

I find it oppressive to work for minimum wage. I find it oppressive to act like the customer is always right. I find it dehumanizing to apologize for things that aren't my fault, like how much something costs or if you order something wrong and you want it remade the correct way. I find it dehumanizing to say "Hi! How are you?" and in response get "Yeah I just need a blah blah blah" and then have a customer go back to their cell phone conversation. I hate being reduced to a cash register.

You're forgetting something. That's because they LIKE sex work. We are talking about a girl who DISLIKES sex work. COMPLETELY different topics.

 

[AlexLady]

Once you get over your insecurities, zander, let her post here and ask questions herself.



And no Megan; many camgirls hate it in private. It's their job to look like they love it so I doubt any would speak up on this. They just aren't scared for life just because someone says they have nice tits because they aren't one to believe their body is something to hide or that sex somehow "violates/devalues/ruins" them or "masturbation makes girls loose" or any of those other outdated guilts religion throws on sex.


He specifically said "She wants to get back into camming" so I think as a mother she has thought over the pro's and con's.

Either way; she can speak more clearly if she was to talk for herself.

 

[curvyredhead]

Yeah

There is a big difference between doing sex work for the money only ---while either loving it, or at least comfy with it.

And...doing sex work for money only --- while you dislike it---to the point of not wanting to show your face.

Putting aside the mental effects of sex work. Camming or porn in particular can and most likly will stick with forever, or least for a long period after stopping. There will always be a lingering chance of future or current co-workers, family and friends finding out, finding content (even if you are open about it). Esp with a child on the way, its a massive decision to decide to take the leap of faith and commit to it. There is also no garentee of success...so while your taking all these risks, there is no garentee they will be profitable.

And let's be frank...if your doing it just for the money, and the money is not comming in...at that point....is it worth it? And yes, you wont know until you try...but again taking the jump is not to be taken lightly.

Now granted, in this particular case---she is a former cam model...so I can only hope she understand the risks---seeing how she has already taken them.

 

[PlayboyMegan]

Once you get over your insecurities, zander, let her post here and ask questions herself.



And no Megan; many camgirls hate it in private. It's their job to look like they love it so I doubt any would speak up on this. They just aren't scared for life just because someone says they have nice tits because they aren't one to believe their body is something to hide or that sex somehow "violates/devalues/ruins" them or "masturbation makes girls loose" or any of those other outdated guilts religion throws on sex.


He specifically said "She wants to get back into camming" so I think as a mother she has thought over the pro's and con's.

Either way; she can speak more clearly if she was to talk for herself.

Firstly, Zander is NOT insecure just because he doesn't want her doing sex work and you don't even know if she wants to ask questions or not. Saying he should "let her" implies that he's not letting her and you do not know if that's true.

Secondly, the first example you gave was one which a girl LIKED sex work. Therefore does not count.
I don't believe that EVERY camgirl who hates camming is going to be psychologically damaged. I do believe they are at a MUCH greater risk to be than if they worked a 9-5 job. You're allowed to think otherwise. Just like you're allowed to believe the world is flat. Fact is, one of us is right and one of us is wrong. I believe with every fiber of my being, I am right in this case. There's just too many examples to back it up.

Thirdly, Zander said she does NOT like camming. So just because she wants the money does NOT mean she's comfortable with the work itself. If she's not comfortable with the work itself, particularly when it's sex work, she should not do it. Period.
I think Jicky made a good point (if I understood her correctly). You don't have to love sex work, but you cannot dislike sex work and do it with no possible consequences afterwards.

Fourthly, I still have not had anyone be able to explain or dispute why being raped is worse than being punched in the face. Not even I can explain it. It just is. It's more psychologically damaging because sex was involved. Can anyone even argue that? Sex work, when you hate it, is no different.
Kind of like electricity, there is a reason it works, I have no clue how it works, but it does.

I knew I'd have the minority opinion because so many girls in here refuse to believe sex work can be anything but positive, but news flash, there is A LOT of negativity regarding sex work. It's frustrating when people make sex work out to be rainbow and lollipops and everyone should be okay and comfortable with it. Not everyone is and that's OKAY.

 

[AlexLady]

Secondly, the first example you gave was one which a girl LIKED sex work. Therefore does not count.

She never says that she likes sex work; only that it is less dehumanizing/etc than retail. It does count. Besides it does not include the models---who can't speak up because it would cost them their income---who truly hate their job. It was simply a less extreme example of that.

It's frustrating when people make sex work out to be rainbow and lollipops and everyone should be okay and comfortable with it. Not everyone is and that's OKAY.

I agree with this. I just take it one step further to say "Not everyone is and that's OKAY BUT it is still a job that people can get paid while they hate it for like any other."

You seem to be a little fervent on this so I'm not going to play the little "explain why rape is worse than being punched in the face" game just to explain to you why it's OK to hate every aspect of one's job. Maybe you've been very privileged in your life and never realized how hard you'd work for money. If so, I'm happy for you.



Sex work, even if you hate it, is not rape.

Willingly having your vagina penetrated is not rape.

Doing it only for the money--willingly--is not rape.

Sex slavery is NOT sex work.

Doing it only for the money--willingly--is sex WORK and not somehow sex slavery just because one hates the job.

 

[JickyJuly]

I think Jicky made a good point (if I understood her correctly). You don't have to love sex work, but you cannot dislike sex work and do it with no possible consequences afterwards.

I don't think she has to like her job. I think liking your job is a luxury. I think she needs to know what she's doing and do her job in a way that makes money if she's going to bother. Her current faceless, easy money plan is a waste of time. Doing a job you don't like for shit money when you could do something else for shit money or do your job correctly for good money is idiocy and irresponsible when you have a family to support.

Maybe I'm cynical or just have had too many crappy jobs, but I don't think sex work is different than other jobs IF you are informed and make the choice to do it. (I'm not sure this particular couple sounds informed.) I've never been punched in the gut while camming. I WAS punched in the gut working at the front desk of a hotel for $6.75 an hour. I've never been bitten by a dog while camming. I WAS bitten by a dog while working at a reptile store for $5.85 an hour. I've never felt like I sold my soul while camming. I DID feel like my soul was in question hocking $20 tshirts to preteens for minimum wage at Hot Topic while their parents stood by hoping their kids didn't become me. My ass has never been grabbed while camming. This was a regular happening when I waited tables. It's all perspective. Sadly, women are going to be objectified at any job they have. You could go work at Taco Bell and dudes will ogle you all day. As much as I like tacos, I prefer camming. Hehehe.

 

[PlayboyMegan]

Secondly, the first example you gave was one which a girl LIKED sex work. Therefore does not count.

She never says that she likes sex work; only that it is less dehumanizing/etc than retail. It does count. Besides it does not include the models---who can't speak up because it would cost them their income---who truly hate their job. It was simply a less extreme example of that.

It's frustrating when people make sex work out to be rainbow and lollipops and everyone should be okay and comfortable with it. Not everyone is and that's OKAY.

I agree with this. I just take it one step further to say "Not everyone is and that's OKAY BUT it is still a job that people can get paid while they hate it for like any other."

You seem to be a little fervent on this so I'm not going to play the little "explain why rape is worse than being punched in the face" game just to explain to you why it's OK to hate every aspect of one's job. Maybe you've been very privileged in your life and never realized how hard you'd work for money. If so, I'm happy for you.



Sex work, even if you hate it, is not rape.

Willingly having your vagina penetrated is not rape.

Doing it only for the money--willingly--is not rape.

Sex slavery is NOT sex work.

Doing it only for the money--willingly--is sex WORK and not somehow sex slavery just because one hates the job.

I agree with this. I just take it one step further to say "Not everyone is and that's OKAY BUT it is still a job that people can get paid while they hate it for like any other."

Yup, that's true, except the psychological consequences with sex work are at a higher risk.

Maybe you've been very privileged in your life and never realized how hard you'd work for money.

Hmmm if you're implying that being a camgirl and personal assistant is not hard in your opinion, then I guess I have never worked hard. If you were not implying that, I'd like for you to elaborate, because I'm not sure what you were trying to say here.

Sex work, even if you hate it, is not rape.

No, it is not. But I believe they both can have psychological damage, which is why I used it as an example. That and they both have to do with sex, in general.

Willingly having your vagina penetrated is not rape.

Doing it only for the money--willingly--is not rape.

Sex slavery is NOT sex work.

I agree with these very random statements.

 

[AlexLady]

Maybe you've been very privileged in your life and never realized how hard you'd work for money.

Hmmm if you're implying that being a camgirl and personal assistant is not hard in your opinion, then I guess I have never worked hard. If you were not implying that, I'd like for you to elaborate, because I'm not sure what you were trying to say here.

No problem; I'd hate for a misunderstanding to make things come accost hardhearted. I just meant maybe you've never starved, lived on the streets, etc; something that would show you how much you can hate what you do and still do it sanely if it meant survival.

 

[PunkInDrublic]

Once you get over your insecurities

lol So a guy not being cool with the future mother of his child performing sex acts for any stranger with a couple extra bucks is insecure? Kinda seems like sex workers go to excuse when a guy isn't thrilled about being with one.

 

[PlayboyMegan]

Maybe you've been very privileged in your life and never realized how hard you'd work for money.

Hmmm if you're implying that being a camgirl and personal assistant is not hard in your opinion, then I guess I have never worked hard. If you were not implying that, I'd like for you to elaborate, because I'm not sure what you were trying to say here.

No problem; I'd hate for a misunderstanding to make things come accost hardhearted. I just meant maybe you've never starved, lived on the streets, etc; something that would show you how much you can hate what you do and still do it sanely if it meant survival.

See but I HAVE been on the streets which is exactly why I am against girls doing sex work when they hate it. I lived off of soup kitchens and welfare. My mother didn't turn to sex work for money because A. She didn't want to so she shouldn't have to and B. There are always other options. She did, however, turn to sex work when she was addicted to meth and desperate for her next hit. I guess you can't get meth at the soup kitchens.
Go to a church and let them know you don't want to do sex work but you fear it might be your only option because you have no money. I can guarantee you at least 50% of the churches will help you out tremendously. You don't even have to be religious.

 

[PlayboyMegan]

Oh and I realize you may need extra things that welfare can't provide which is why I told OP to step up and get another job.

 

[BambiPersimmon]

Once you get over your insecurities

lol So a guy not being cool with the future mother of his child performing sex acts for any stranger with a couple extra bucks is insecure? Kinda seems like sex workers go to excuse when a guy isn't thrilled about being with one.

Camming doesn't have to mean "performing sex acts for strangers." There are non nude models. There are models who cam completely based off their personality and solely act as a companion with no sexual stuff thrown in. And I believe the insecurity part people were pointing at was the OP's usage of words that came off as possessive, which he may not have intended to use, but that will set many cam ladies' alerts off due to having dealt with controlling significant others in the past. We don't know OP or his fiance. We can only surmise things about him based off the limited information he has given us, and can only try to guess his fiance's side of things. It is natural for us to fill in the blanks with our personal experiences It isn't an "excuse". No one is trying to foster an environment where men aren't allowed to have opinions or objections.

 

[HiGirlsRHot]

Once you get over your insecurities, zander, let her post here and ask questions herself.



And no Megan; many camgirls hate it in private. It's their job to look like they love it so I doubt any would speak up on this. They just aren't scared for life just because someone says they have nice tits because they aren't one to believe their body is something to hide or that sex somehow "violates/devalues/ruins" them or "masturbation makes girls loose" or any of those other outdated guilts religion throws on sex.


He specifically said "She wants to get back into camming" so I think as a mother she has thought over the pro's and con's.

Either way; she can speak more clearly if she was to talk for herself.

Secondly, the first example you gave was one which a girl LIKED sex work. Therefore does not count.
I don't believe that EVERY camgirl who hates camming is going to be psychologically damaged. I do believe they are at a MUCH greater risk to be than if they worked a 9-5 job. You're allowed to think otherwise. Just like you're allowed to believe the world is flat. Fact is, one of us is right and one of us is wrong. I believe with every fiber of my being, I am right in this case. There's just too many examples to back it up.

Thirdly, Zander said she does NOT like camming. So just because she wants the money does NOT mean she's comfortable with the work itself. If she's not comfortable with the work itself, particularly when it's sex work, she should not do it. Period.
I think Jicky made a good point (if I understood her correctly). You don't have to love sex work, but you cannot dislike sex work and do it with no possible consequences afterwards.

Fourthly, I still have not had anyone be able to explain or dispute why being raped is worse than being punched in the face. Not even I can explain it. It just is. It's more psychologically damaging because sex was involved. Can anyone even argue that? Sex work, when you hate it, is no different.
Kind of like electricity, there is a reason it works, I have no clue how it works, but it does.

I knew I'd have the minority opinion because so many girls in here refuse to believe sex work can be anything but positive, but news flash, there is A LOT of negativity regarding sex work. It's frustrating when people make sex work out to be rainbow and lollipops and everyone should be okay and comfortable with it. Not everyone is and that's OKAY.

I obviously don't have first hand knowledge, but I'm pretty sure Megan is right, I've read too many stories/research and over the years of former porn stars and prostitute being psychologically damaged to believe differently. Now camming is different and likely not as bad psychologically.

Threadjacking even more, I don't think people appreciate how unrepresentative ACF is of camming world in general. The members tip, many of us quite a bit, and aren't on the site primarily for the sex but for the social aspects. The models (at least the ones who post a lot) are almost entirely successful models. We know from mycamgirl.net that 134 models join each day but 76% quit within the first 4 months. ACF has almost no posts from those 76%, other than the 3 posts saying, I'm really struggling, help! Now maybe they post in the models sections,why they are quitting. But for the most part it seems to me they just stop camming one day.

We also know the median camscore is 467, that means that 50% have camscore below 467. I can't think of any regular ACF poster who have a camscore that low. A camscore in the range is $10-12/hour above minimum wage, but certainly not big bucks. I also notice that is very rare to see a model who has spent more than 20/hours week over a 6 month period. (I.e the default mode when you look at mycamgirl.net) Now I am not sure if this because models are so busy doing other cam related activity (filming content,answering emails, posting on social networks, working on profile etc.) or that camming is hard psychologically. My guess it is a combo. In any case if you are at the median camscore model putting in 10-20/hours a week you're struggling to make $500-1,000 month. Meanwhile you hear, and can see, that top models are making $50K/month this don't sound like a receipt for boosting ones ego. Plenty of people hate their jobs As Megan says this is about sex and its different, if not for everybody but for most people.

 

[PlayboyMegan]

Every single person in the world works "just" so they can clothe, feed, and shelter themselves.

I forgot to touch on this. I am a person in this world, obviously. I do not do sex work JUST so I can afford necessities. That is just ONE out of MANY reasons I do sex work. I ENJOY sex work, I get to create my own hours, I get to ban assholes, I get to play games, I'm really social and love meeting new people, I get to be myself, I get to dress up in costumes, and I can go on for days. THAT"S why I do sex work, because of the things I listed.
Now, you don't have to like the things that I do to do sex work. But you were completely wrong in saying "EVERY single person in the world."
Actually, it makes me really sad you think that because your opinion is obviously coming from your own state of mind.

 

[Sevrin]

I'm not entirely sure that it's the sex *work* itself that leads to psychological damage rather than
1-Substance dependence that leads to sex work
2-Societal rejection due to choice of work
3-Abuse suffered because sex workers do not receive the same protections as non-sex workers and/or are forced to work in situations that are inherently dangerous
4-Latent psychological conditions aggravated by sex work
5-Other stuff

As has been mentioned, you can suffer abuse, including sexual abuse, in any line of work. Independent cam models have a lot more control over their working conditions than (almost?) any other type of sex worker, and more than a lot of non-sex workers, too.

Anyway, if BabyMama4U has already been successful as a cam model in the past, and did not quit because she hated it, I think she can probably handle it without suffering too badly as a result.

 

[PlayboyMegan]

Once you get over your insecurities, zander, let her post here and ask questions herself.



And no Megan; many camgirls hate it in private. It's their job to look like they love it so I doubt any would speak up on this. They just aren't scared for life just because someone says they have nice tits because they aren't one to believe their body is something to hide or that sex somehow "violates/devalues/ruins" them or "masturbation makes girls loose" or any of those other outdated guilts religion throws on sex.


He specifically said "She wants to get back into camming" so I think as a mother she has thought over the pro's and con's.

Either way; she can speak more clearly if she was to talk for herself.

Secondly, the first example you gave was one which a girl LIKED sex work. Therefore does not count.
I don't believe that EVERY camgirl who hates camming is going to be psychologically damaged. I do believe they are at a MUCH greater risk to be than if they worked a 9-5 job. You're allowed to think otherwise. Just like you're allowed to believe the world is flat. Fact is, one of us is right and one of us is wrong. I believe with every fiber of my being, I am right in this case. There's just too many examples to back it up.

Thirdly, Zander said she does NOT like camming. So just because she wants the money does NOT mean she's comfortable with the work itself. If she's not comfortable with the work itself, particularly when it's sex work, she should not do it. Period.
I think Jicky made a good point (if I understood her correctly). You don't have to love sex work, but you cannot dislike sex work and do it with no possible consequences afterwards.

Fourthly, I still have not had anyone be able to explain or dispute why being raped is worse than being punched in the face. Not even I can explain it. It just is. It's more psychologically damaging because sex was involved. Can anyone even argue that? Sex work, when you hate it, is no different.
Kind of like electricity, there is a reason it works, I have no clue how it works, but it does.

I knew I'd have the minority opinion because so many girls in here refuse to believe sex work can be anything but positive, but news flash, there is A LOT of negativity regarding sex work. It's frustrating when people make sex work out to be rainbow and lollipops and everyone should be okay and comfortable with it. Not everyone is and that's OKAY.

I obviously don't have first hand knowledge, but I'm pretty sure Megan is right, I've read too many stories/research and over the years of former porn stars and prostitute being psychologically damaged to believe differently. Now camming is different and likely not as bad psychologically.

Threadjacking even more, I don't think people appreciate how unrepresentative ACF is of camming world in general.

Thank you.
I want to say that the following is just speculation since there has been no research on the topic.
I agree, camming is probably not as bad as other types of sex work where you get physically touched.
I also agree with that last statement I quoted.
Out of ALL the camgirls in the world, how many of them belong to a forum? A very small minority. Why? Well there can be several reasons, including but not limited to, they are stupid and didn't do their research about camming, they hate camming, they are forced into camming, they just don't like forums, their studios won't let them. I'm going to say the majority is probably that they didn't do any research on camming therefore didn't find the forums or they hate/don't care about camming.
On ACF, the majority of women HAVE done their research and do love their job. These girls will probably experience no damage after their sex work career is over. But again, that is the MINORITY. We're missing a huge chunk of people.

 

[Camgirl]

The other is about camming "just for the money" and the idea that doing this is “wrong”.

Maybe I am misunderstanding, but it seems like the main point Alex, Jicky and others are making is that it is totally OK to cam or do sex work just for the money as long as you are not somehow doing it against your will. Doing it willingly while having things you dislike/hate about it is NOT against ones will. Just because you start camming out of despair and not because "I just love masturbating and performing" does not mean there is a problem.

I started camming because I was laid off from my job at a CPA firm after 5 years during the height of unemployment in Florida. I didn't "WANT" to cam, but after a year of unemployment and the inability to get a job ANYWHERE in Florida that could support me and my daughter I didn't "WANT" to be homeless. Even though it was something I didn't really "want" to do, I did it, and it was the BEST.DECISION.EVER!

Had I come here and said "OMG, I am DESPERATE! I need to make $$ right now but I am very "nervous/unsure/confused/insert any other adjective here to express doubt", I likely would have been told not to do it because it was "for the wrong reasons". In my opinion, that would have been bad advice.

There are things I hate about camming. There are things I love about camming, but realistically, 99% of those things have to do with money. The number #1 thing I love about camming is freedom it gives me and the time I can spend with my family. None of that would be possible with out the money. So I assume that means I cam for the money. The orgasms and interaction is awesome too, but that is not why I cam. Having friendly co-workers at the CPA firm was nice too, but I didn't go to work for the social aspect, I went to work to earn money. Same with camming.

 

[PlayboyMegan]

I started camming because I was laid off from my job at a CPA firm after 5 years during the height of unemployment in Florida. I didn't "WANT" to cam, but after a year of unemployment and the inability to get a job ANYWHERE in Florida that could support me and my daughter I didn't "WANT" to be homeless. Even though it was something I didn't really "want" to do, I did it, and it was the BEST.DECISION.EVER!

But now you like it. She's tried it and does NOT enjoy it. There's a big difference.

 

[Camgirl]

I started camming because I was laid off from my job at a CPA firm after 5 years during the height of unemployment in Florida. I didn't "WANT" to cam, but after a year of unemployment and the inability to get a job ANYWHERE in Florida that could support me and my daughter I didn't "WANT" to be homeless. Even though it was something I didn't really "want" to do, I did it, and it was the BEST.DECISION.EVER!

But now you like it. She's tried it and does NOT enjoy it. There's a big difference.

There is a difference between liking the things the money provides and liking "it". I think that is the point you are missing. It is okay to like camming "just for the money".

Edit: I would like to add that if someone is miserable camming and they log off in tears every day or some other emotion that is making them hate themselves or whatever, then YES of course, doing it "just for the money" is totally a bad idea. Maybe that is what you mean and I am missing it.

There obviously has to be a comfort level, etc. with masturbating, camming, etc. that has to go with it. I think those people figure it out fast enough because if they are that miserable it shows, and they likely aren't making any money anyway.

 

[PlayboyMegan]

I started camming because I was laid off from my job at a CPA firm after 5 years during the height of unemployment in Florida. I didn't "WANT" to cam, but after a year of unemployment and the inability to get a job ANYWHERE in Florida that could support me and my daughter I didn't "WANT" to be homeless. Even though it was something I didn't really "want" to do, I did it, and it was the BEST.DECISION.EVER!

But now you like it. She's tried it and does NOT enjoy it. There's a big difference.

There is a difference between liking the things the money provides and liking "it". I think that is the point you are missing. It is okay to like camming "just for the money".

That's where we'll have to agree to disagree.
I believe that doing sexual things JUST for money can be more psychologically damaging than doing non-sexual things JUST for money. Therefore, should not be done. ESPECIALLY when you have a child and need to be mentally fit for them.
You obviously disagree with those statements. That's okay. But one of us is right and the other is wrong. Guess we'll never know until it is deemed fact in the psychology world.

 

[Anarah]

I gotta agree with missrosexox, AlexLady, JickyJuly

Personally, and I'm sure I'm not the only one, working my ass off in retail type jobs did a HUGE number on me psychologically and seriously messed with my mental health. I'm not going to go into details right now, but it fucking wrecked me. Camming has not. I cam for money. I do not particularly LIKE it. It's a job that I CAN do without too much stress and it makes me enough money. Because of all this, it's acceptable. For THAT reason I do not hate it. Because of the money. But it's not something I would choose to do otherwise and not something I would say I love doing. I just love the money that it can get me. Just because you don't really like doing something doesn't mean it's going to screw you up mentally, camming included.

While of course there are many cases when it is, sex work is not necessarily more psychologically damaging than "normal" jobs for everyone and I personally think it's kind of narrow-minded and ignorant to say so. I too am sick of people trying to say that in such definitive terms. It's not definitive. It actually seems kind of offensive to me, but I can't really articulate exactly why right now. Perhaps because people seem to have this idea in their head that these McDonaldsy/retail jobs are bearable for everyone but sex work isn't. It's irksome when people try to generalize sex work this way, as being "more likely to damage" you, or whatever. Retail fucking IS NOT bearable for everyone AT ALL. Not even close. Neither of them is tolerable for everyone. Both of them can cause psychological damage. It depends on the person and a variety of other factors.
I might also point out that sex work gets more shit for being psychologically damaging than other jobs. If you're having serious mental problems because of a "normal" job, you get told to suck it up, that's life. Even if it is the fault of the job that is causing you problems. But suddenly if it is the slightest bit sex related, oh it's all the jobs fault! It's nearly impossible to say how many people are negatively affected by their regular jobs because nobody gives a shit if your office job is making you want to seriously slit your wrists. There are not really any statistics for this, as far as I can tell, so it's a tough thing to truly discuss(is voluntary sex work TRULY far more likely to be damaging or do we just hear more about it in that context?? If anyone does have some research/statistics explored regarding this I'd love to see), but either way I maintain that it'd be better to steer away from those generalizations, which I feel like I have been seeing a lot of lately.

I agree with AlexLady's comment:

This idea that sex is supposed to be mentally damaging to a person seems more like a cultural thing that people just accept/believe before they can make an opinion of their own similar to how people think sex is something "shameful."

I think it absolutely is a cultural thing we've been conditioned to. There's so much stigma attached to it. I think the entire industry and everyone in it would be a completely different story if it was just accepted and treated just like any other job from the beginning. Clearly too late for that though xD Although I feel like a while ago I read something about all those negative things really improving in a certain country where they legalized and regulated prostitution? I can't really remember anything else about it now but it was something along those lines, unless I am just going crazy lmao. I'll have to try to look for it again.
Sevrin raised good points too, which I would also second.

Edited because of new posts: Ah! at Camgirl.

There is a difference between liking the things the money provides and liking "it". I think that is the point you are missing. It is okay to like camming "just for the money".

100% THIS