Let me apologize for the long post, but what happened is hard to condense. This has got to be unusual even in the cam world.
I love women. I genuinely do. I love conversing with them, joking around, just being friends or more.
Until recently I never really thought about webcams but on a whim I decided to check it out. Taking into account what I said above it sounded interesting. The chance to chat with different women and reward the most interesting with a few tips. It's not something I remotely regarded as a dating site, just entertainment since I was bored at the moment.
Sooo. I clicked on one chat room (a different site and model who will remain unnamed) and lo and behold I saw a young woman who was (at least to me) one of the most beautiful visions I had ever seen. I'm not the smoothest talker in the world, but I do know how to build a rapport. Keep her laughing, be interesting, be different, so I automatically interacted that way. She seemed to enjoy the chat so I went back a couple of times to chat with her. She's a sweetheart. Romanian girl. I adore her. Bright, educated, charming. Fantasy or real I really did feel romantic attraction. She got the old endorphins flowing for sure.
Anyhow, to condense a long story a little I eventually just concluded to myself that she was just doing her job. Last time I talked to her she really didn't pay much attention when I popped in. Guess I did feel a bit hurt by that but didn't take it too personally. So I figured that was that. The fun was over and the idea that I was special to her in any way was all my imagination. Still, she does have a nice figure and since I'd never even asked her to show her goodies in private (the interaction we had going was just more enjoyable), when she went into a private chat with someone I decided to blow off my last credits. I did the spy thing just to see what I'd been missing before I threw in the towel. After all, she's just doing her job and won't care, right? That's when I got blindsided. Never saw this coming.
She suddenly gets a shocked look on her face, grabs something to cover herself and goes off camera. If she wasn't genuine in her reaction then I'm calling the academy because she deserves an award. Turns out she was apparently much more aware of my screen name than I assumed. She'd spotted it in the spy area and didn't take it very well. I chatted with her afterward and she was pretty upset that I'd seen her that way. She said she was embarressed and that if I wanted to see her naked then I should have done it in our private chats because it would have been more intimate. It seemed as though she felt that me seeing her perform for another guy degraded her in my eyes. Of course, I apologized profusely and tried to explain myself. She eventually forgave me and we got back to our previous state of things (more or less). If that was a hook and not genuine then she's a cam girl genus. I can't see how it was fake. I teased her a little that I now knew what was in her heart despite her attempts to hide it, which she tried to downplay. But really, I can't imagine someone reacting like that, walking out during a private chat even, if there's nothing emotional going on, know? That mixed with worrying whether she'd get in trouble for it makes it uncomfortable to say the least.
That just leaves me dangling. On one hand, the site TOS prohibits giving or taking private information or dating the models so trying to pursue this would be breaking the rules. I imagine that her employer prohibits the same things and I wouldn't want to cause her problems. Besides, I'm getting to be an old dog. This gal is in her latter 20s and I'm 20 years older. All that and thousands of miles make pursuing something look impossible.
On the other hand, I just can't shake the idea that my dream girl seemed to actually have feelings for me no matter how well she otherwise hid them. That's the kind of thing that haunts you for life without closure.
I can't even begin to imagine what the right thing to do is. Maybe those more familiar with this whole cam world can give me some insight. I sure would appreciate.
I love women. I genuinely do. I love conversing with them, joking around, just being friends or more.
Until recently I never really thought about webcams but on a whim I decided to check it out. Taking into account what I said above it sounded interesting. The chance to chat with different women and reward the most interesting with a few tips. It's not something I remotely regarded as a dating site, just entertainment since I was bored at the moment.
Sooo. I clicked on one chat room (a different site and model who will remain unnamed) and lo and behold I saw a young woman who was (at least to me) one of the most beautiful visions I had ever seen. I'm not the smoothest talker in the world, but I do know how to build a rapport. Keep her laughing, be interesting, be different, so I automatically interacted that way. She seemed to enjoy the chat so I went back a couple of times to chat with her. She's a sweetheart. Romanian girl. I adore her. Bright, educated, charming. Fantasy or real I really did feel romantic attraction. She got the old endorphins flowing for sure.
Anyhow, to condense a long story a little I eventually just concluded to myself that she was just doing her job. Last time I talked to her she really didn't pay much attention when I popped in. Guess I did feel a bit hurt by that but didn't take it too personally. So I figured that was that. The fun was over and the idea that I was special to her in any way was all my imagination. Still, she does have a nice figure and since I'd never even asked her to show her goodies in private (the interaction we had going was just more enjoyable), when she went into a private chat with someone I decided to blow off my last credits. I did the spy thing just to see what I'd been missing before I threw in the towel. After all, she's just doing her job and won't care, right? That's when I got blindsided. Never saw this coming.
She suddenly gets a shocked look on her face, grabs something to cover herself and goes off camera. If she wasn't genuine in her reaction then I'm calling the academy because she deserves an award. Turns out she was apparently much more aware of my screen name than I assumed. She'd spotted it in the spy area and didn't take it very well. I chatted with her afterward and she was pretty upset that I'd seen her that way. She said she was embarressed and that if I wanted to see her naked then I should have done it in our private chats because it would have been more intimate. It seemed as though she felt that me seeing her perform for another guy degraded her in my eyes. Of course, I apologized profusely and tried to explain myself. She eventually forgave me and we got back to our previous state of things (more or less). If that was a hook and not genuine then she's a cam girl genus. I can't see how it was fake. I teased her a little that I now knew what was in her heart despite her attempts to hide it, which she tried to downplay. But really, I can't imagine someone reacting like that, walking out during a private chat even, if there's nothing emotional going on, know? That mixed with worrying whether she'd get in trouble for it makes it uncomfortable to say the least.
That just leaves me dangling. On one hand, the site TOS prohibits giving or taking private information or dating the models so trying to pursue this would be breaking the rules. I imagine that her employer prohibits the same things and I wouldn't want to cause her problems. Besides, I'm getting to be an old dog. This gal is in her latter 20s and I'm 20 years older. All that and thousands of miles make pursuing something look impossible.
On the other hand, I just can't shake the idea that my dream girl seemed to actually have feelings for me no matter how well she otherwise hid them. That's the kind of thing that haunts you for life without closure.
I can't even begin to imagine what the right thing to do is. Maybe those more familiar with this whole cam world can give me some insight. I sure would appreciate.