My girlfriend is cam model

[Zack25]

This is strange to ask but my girlfriend is a cam girl right we kind have a long distance relationship going on everything is good I think I was online with her I try to be there for her anyway i try to support her even though she said i don't have to give her any money at first I questions it but I just let it be but one problem she was getting insult bad mean comments towards her obviously I didn't say anything because you know it not my place online but she got mad at me because I didn't do anything I didn't defended her was I suppose to I mean I didn't want to get in her way was I wrong I mean its new to me a girlfriend as cam girl what are the rule how do I be a good boyfriend Any advice

 

[Natalie_Lavender]

I honestly thought this was going to be another one of “those” posts, but it doesn’t seem to be. Yay!

Now to your question...it sounds like your gf might not be cut out for this industry. Unless she’s made you her mod so you can boot people from her room for her, just replying in chat to defend her can just create drama. And no one wants to be in a room with drama, at least not most.

She needs to manage her own room & chat. There will always be trolls. There will always be someone who says something you don’t like or agree with. So she needs to boot them from her room or deal with it verbally herself head on.

She needs thick skin to do this job. That’s not your responsibility.

 

[AudriTwo]

i don't think you are in fault for not coming to her defense when she was getting trolled, but if you were present in her chat, logged on, i can see why she got upset.

also agree with @Natalie_Lavender, she really needs to learn how to maintain her room and deal with unruly members on her own. it's not your job unless it has been agreed beforehand that you will moderate. if you are moderating, ask her for examples on how she does want you to get involved. if you aren't moderating, i would not make it a habit to watch/log on while she is camming.

little warning, it maybe unappealing to other members watching if her boyfriend is constantly involved with camming when she is running a solo account. it might kill the fantasy. something to keep in mind.

 

[CheeseMoon]

[...] but she just said that I was her boyfriend I am suppose to defend her

Sure, but you can't follow your girlfriends to work so you can look after them. It's not how the universe works. Would she ask the same if she was a truck driver or worked at a shoe store?
Ask if she can make you a mod so you get some actual tools to protect her (to a certain extent, anyway), then discuss the ground rules for it.

But if I were you, I would just completely stay away when she works.

 

[Zack25]

Sure, but you can't follow your girlfriends to work so you can look after them. It's not how the universe works. Would she ask the same if she was a truck driver or worked at a shoe store?
Ask if she can make you a mod so you get some actual tools to protect her (to a certain extent, anyway), then discuss the ground rules for it.

But if I were you, I would just completely stay away when she works.

Hmm well nope she would not

 

[Smoothie]

It sounds like she not only wants you there, but also wants you to be active in her room while she works (correct me if I drew the wrong conclusions). In that case:

1) You should be her moderator if you aren’t already. It’s so much easier to silence jerks and move on than to argue with them in public chat. And it’s a lot less awkward for the other users.

2) If you’re her boyfriend, I’d avoid making it obvious while she’s working. You don’t have to lie about it, but just be mindful that if it’s obvious one of the users is her very active boyfriend, you might dissuade some users from tipping or chatting without realizing it.

3) Above all, make sure she tells you what she wants. Especially if it’s counterintuitive. Asking is better than guessing.

 

[Zack25]

Hmm well I'll keep that in mind I mean she did ask me to stay online with her the hold time she was online but she sometime confused me like should I just talk about with her

 

[Zack25]

I'm a idiot for falling for a cam girl i mean you look at her and one might even wonder how can she feel the same way I feel about her she actually likes me back she told me she wants to meet in person I don't doubt her i honestly feel like it's the truth I believe her i am not rich I am nobody and I definitely no bard Pitt or Tom Cruise but I am not bad to look at some how I find myself wondering what did I do that other veiwer didn't do i mean I was truly just being myself I was just honest from the start it just kind off happened sorry I just need to get this off my chest I know it sound dumb to some people but I'm actually in a long distance relationship with a cam girl

 

[mike_aussie]

Don't mix business and pleasure.

Also I wouldn't call a relationship a relationship if you've never met in person.

 

[Zack25]

Don't mix business and pleasure.

Also I wouldn't call a relationship a relationship if you've never met in person.

I am not she is allowed to do what she please I won't get in her way I already know do you people know the meaning on don't mix business with pleasure because it's seems like you all use those word alot you all seem to have issues probably should fix that

 

[Danigirl]

Usually long distance relationships have met at some point. Don't get all defensive with @mike_aussie as his advice is pretty helpful in most instances especially if you've never met. Only a few couples work well together with one partner camming as it takes a non jealous partner. Usually it works best with the non camming partner being supportive of the model but without actually interacting during work. Mr Dani is my tech dude but he doesn't moderate or help during cam hours unless a weird tech glitch. So either define clear expectations before camming that you're both ok with or don't join in.

Red flags popping up all over with this.

 

[Zack25]

Usually long distance relationships have met at some point. Don't get all defensive with @mike_aussie as his advice is pretty helpful in most instances especially if you've never met. Only a few couples work well together with one partner camming as it takes a non jealous partner. Usually it works best with the non camming partner being supportive of the model but without actually interacting during work. Mr Dani is my tech dude but he doesn't moderate or help during cam hours unless a weird tech glitch. So either define clear expectations before camming that you're both ok with or don't join in.

Red flags popping up all over with this.

Ok I understand thanks

 

[DoD404]

not clear if you did meet her... anyway
if no : just ignore the critic and continue as you can
if yes : don't try to understand too deeply and refer to the MLP

 

[Zack25]

not clear if you did meet her... anyway
if no : just ignore the critic and continue as you can
if yes : don't try to understand too deeply and refer to the MLP

View attachment 85476

woow really

 

[Dan Epstein]

Your girlfriend can also be a nurse, and nurses get trolled and harassed a lot, yet we still don't expect you to storm in to the operations room. This is experience talking here, don't lurk your girlfriend's chat room, try to be the best boyfriend you can in real life instead

 

[Zack25]

Your girlfriend can also be a nurse, and nurses get trolled and harassed a lot, yet we still don't expect you to storm in to the operations room. This is experience talking here, don't lurk your girlfriend's chat room, try to be the best boyfriend you can in real life instead

I don't lurk on her online but I do wanna be a good boyfriend in real life i support her ( not with money) I mean like being there for her in whatever way I can possible can be there I accept her and I willing to work at it I've considered everything even the consequences but I'm still want a good relationship with her even if we are far from each other

 

[Natalie_Lavender]

Well after a few more of your comments, now I’m curious.....did she give you her REAL contact info? Or just her cam stuff?

 

[Dan Epstein]

What Natalie said

 

[SNATCH]

Why would you come here for help, and then when you don’t like people’s answers, be rude to them? Like, wtf is that??? Pretty sure that everyone that answered you in this thread (except for like one person) answered your question nicely, & honestly.

Being passive aggressive on this forum isn’t going to get you very far. Idk if you’re dealing with some crazy shit or what (since 2020 is the biggest dumpster fire there ever was lol) but seriously, be nice to people? (& don’t take out whatever fucked off shit you’re going through on the people nice enough to try & help you out)

I am not she is allowed to do what she please I won't get in her way I already know do you people know the meaning on don't mix business with pleasure because it's seems like you all use those word alot you all seem to have issues probably should fix that

 

[Carmita Bonita]

As someone who fell for a cam site member, did the long-distance relationship thing for 9 months and have been living together for years since the advice of separating business and pleasure is in fact, spot on advice.

No dudes want to fap to someone's girlfriend while their boyfriend white knights the room (Unless they're into that sort of thing as a fetish lol). You being there would only enable her not to control her own room.

When we were long-distance the support my boyfriend gave me wasn't hanging out in my room defending me to trolls. In fact, i told him to stop visiting my room because I couldn't see him as a member anymore and it clearly showed to the rest of the room. He would support me by hanging out with me on skype for hours whether we'd be playing games online together,listening to me rant or watching netflix he would help me unwind from work.

 

[Zack25]

Well after a few more of your comments, now I’m curious.....did she give you her REAL contact info? Or just her cam stuff?

Her contact

 

[Zack25]

As someone who fell for a cam site member, did the long-distance relationship thing for 9 months and have been living together for years since the advice of separating business and pleasure is in fact, spot on advice.

No dudes want to fap to someone's girlfriend while their boyfriend white knights the room (Unless they're into that sort of thing as a fetish lol). You being there would only enable her not to control her own room.

When we were long-distance the support my boyfriend gave me wasn't hanging out in my room defending me to trolls. In fact, i told him to stop visiting my room because I couldn't see him as a member anymore and it clearly showed to the rest of the room. He would support me by hanging out with me on skype for hours whether we'd be playing games online together,listening to me rant or watching netflix he would help me unwind from work.

Noted : if i sound rude in some comments I am not trying to be . We have talk about it We are both ok with being online in chat room together beside in not like we are gonna tell the hold room chat about us why should they know ?

 

[Deleted member 37064]

Usually long distance relationships have met at some point. Don't get all defensive with @mike_aussie as his advice is pretty helpful in most instances especially if you've never met. Only a few couples work well together with one partner camming as it takes a non jealous partner. Usually it works best with the non camming partner being supportive of the model but without actually interacting during work. Mr Dani is my tech dude but he doesn't moderate or help during cam hours unless a weird tech glitch. So either define clear expectations before camming that you're both ok with or don't join in.

Red flags popping up all over with this.

Agreed. If you're in a long distance relationship, you're very active with one another away from work. But, I would not refer to it as boyfriend/girlfriend until there's been significant time spent together in person. Remember, you only see what she wants you to see. Vice versa with you to her. You might get along great online, because there's the mystery and intrigue of someone, somewhere is interested in you. But, it could all fall apart the instant you meet.

I have very limited experience in long distance relationships. So, I can't comment much on them. But, IMO, it's more of a fantasy until meet in person and spend significant time with one another. Each time together, looking forward to the next.


@Zack25 What countries are you and your "girlfriend" in?

 

[NotYou]

Hopefully, you discussed with her what others have mentioned about you not needing (or shouldn't) "defend" her as a partner.
IF she does want you there and to be a moderator, remember to look at things objectively and logically, not through "boyfriend goggles". I am sure I won't need to explain that too much. When someone insults your partner, it's more natural to get much angrier than say, if it was just a model you're a moderator for. So, what I mean is, as a moderator and friend to a model, obviously you don't want to see guys being horrible, rude, trolling, etc etc etc so respond in THAT way, and not as a pissed-off boyfriend.

Don't let emotions get the better of you and cloud judgment.



Also, Happy Birthday @ForceTen

 

[Zack25]

Hmm I see alright I understand thanks for many advice and point of view I appreciate it

 

[Zack25]

Agreed. If you're in a long distance relationship, you're very active with one another away from work. But, I would not refer to it as boyfriend/girlfriend until there's been significant time spent together in person. Remember, you only see what she wants you to see. Vice versa with you to her. You might get along great online, because there's the mystery and intrigue of someone, somewhere is interested in you. But, it could all fall apart the instant you meet.

I have very limited experience in long distance relationships. So, I can't comment much on them. But, IMO, it's more of a fantasy until meet in person and spend significant time with one another. Each time together, looking forward to the next.


@Zack25 What countries are you and your "girlfriend" in?

We are very far from each other

 

[Deleted member 37064]

We are very far from each other

I don't know if you've read any of these. But, might be worth a read for some insight.
"In love with a cam girl" - The Collection of Threads | ACF

I'm not saying your situation is identical to these. But, some of what you've said gives me the same vibe as others who have come here asking similar questions.

 

[Lelo1]

If your not sure if you should do some thing, just ask her.

How did you two meet?

 

[melanieoncam]

We are very far from each other

So you have never even met in person?

Talking online, even on skype with video, is far different than meeting in person and spending a lot of time together. You can't call it a relationship until you do that.

Honestly even if you had met on a dating site I would say that, has nothing to do with where you met. either or both of you may find out you are very different in person. The chemistry may not be there.

Don't invest too heavily emotionally or financially on either end until you have spent time together!

 

[Zack25]

I don't know if you've read any of these. But, might be worth a read for some insight.
"In love with a cam girl" - The Collection of Threads | ACF

I'm not saying your situation is identical to these. But, some of what you've said gives me the same vibe as others who have come here asking similar questions.

Yes I read them and the comments people say to those guys I mean people you need to try and be more positive or at least try I mean some of us we are only humans we are allowed to fall in love who ever we chose or it just happens I get the whole idea behind it but come on probably the ones that broken those guy heart was every one online in this website