So today something that happened has inspired me to write about and ask for feedback on it. There are 2 questions that arose from the scenario today.
Scenario:
I had a raffle running. It was a mere 22 tokens to enter, and the prize was 2 of my Cootie Shot Glasses to be shipped to the winner. A rather "new-ish" member (whom has been visiting a few times over the last couple weeks and tipping sweetly, without accepting/asking for anything in return, i.e. videos/pics/scrolls on the wall, etc, he just claims to enjoy what I do on cam and tips for my entertaining presence) tipped a couple of times for the raffle but admits he just wanted to see me bend over to write tickets and didn't actually WANT the tickets.
Fair enough. I would rather people only enter my raffles/contests if they actually WANT the item to be won. Cool!
A few minutes later, enters a member whom I have never interacted with before nor spoken with on any other occasion. This member has a name that implies they are a female. More specifically, a female whom is interested in other females. Her very first comments in the chat were to the effect of "will you offer these again in the future?" and a little while later, after some comments about some nail polish I was showing off "oh boohoo I'm so sad I don't have any tokens to enter the (22 token) raffle...." I mention that it's ONLY 22 tokens, but that's ok, there will be possibly other opportunities to win similar items in the future.
The rather "new-ish" member, again tipping because he wants to see me bend over and writes tickets, tips for 2 tickets and puts in the tip note "for xyzmember tickets". Not realizing this note was public, I politely PM'd newish member and let him know that I'd rather not do this for a person that I've never spoken to before (since I'll actually be physically sending items to the winner of the raffle) and especially to a person who hasn't contributed a single token. Ever. He completely understood and we went about our business.
Then in chat I see implied-female member thanking newish member and being all excited. As politely as I could, I explained that I would rather not... blah blah just as I had said in the PM to newish member. I really did try my best to make it sound polite and understanding. And being that it was ONLY 22 tokens, that it wasn't a huge deal. I also mentioned that since I didn't know implied-female member, that I didn't even have any idea if they were, in fact, female.
Fast forward a few minutes, and this person starts spouting off about how "she could provide credentials and she hangs out with TONS of other models and I don't have to ban her she would just leave since she's not wanted..."
:?
Then within about 20 minutes I get a LENGTHY MFC mail going on and on and on about similar things and how I made her cry and "doesn't that make you believe I'm really a woman?".
I just... I like to deal with reasonable people. This is unreasonable, in my opinion.
I'm probably just being a little weird and judgmental, and maybe if the item on the raffle was a video or a pic set which is purely digital, I would have reacted differently. But to physically send an item to a person who hasn't even contributed a nickel, let alone proven to be a cool person, I just feel a tad iffy about. If this person had just joined in and tipped to be in the raffle I wouldn't have questioned it. It shows willingness to participate and such. Or if they had been around before and been part of other conversations, I would have felt more comfortable. Hell, there are people who have never tipped who have won/been gifted items in the past that I was excited to send stuff to, but they had been part of the group that visits somewhat frequently, at least. But today, it was an on-the-fly decision I made, and I stand by it, even though I understand some may disagree with it.
SO, here are the 2 questions I'd love some member AND model feedback on:
1a: Models, how do you feel about members "gifting" items that you're raffling off/selling/etc to other members in your room? Is it acceptable if it's people that you're already familiar with, or not at all?
1b: Members, how do you feel about tipping to "gift" items to the other members? Wouldn't it make more sense to just xfer tokens to them and let them tip for it themselves? Is it because you don't trust that the member will use the tokens the way you want them to? If you don't trust another member with xferred tokens, is it then reasonable for the model to not trust this other member with gifted material? Would you require that the member you're gifting to be a regular person in the model's chat room?
2a: Models, do you feel that members who present themselves as females in your room have to behave a certain way to be taken seriously? Do you think you treat members with female names the same as others?
2b: Members, do you get distracted by members in the room who flaunt the fact that they're female? Is it just their name or their behavior that distracts you? Do you feel it's unfair if a model prefers attention not be drawn to the fact that members may be female?
Edit to add: by the way, I only emphasize that this member had a female name because I do feel, in the end, that members who are female end up getting different attention and possibly more "gifted items" than other male members in rooms. Though previously, the female members whom were gifted items in my room were established and awesome members of my regular group of people.
Scenario:
I had a raffle running. It was a mere 22 tokens to enter, and the prize was 2 of my Cootie Shot Glasses to be shipped to the winner. A rather "new-ish" member (whom has been visiting a few times over the last couple weeks and tipping sweetly, without accepting/asking for anything in return, i.e. videos/pics/scrolls on the wall, etc, he just claims to enjoy what I do on cam and tips for my entertaining presence) tipped a couple of times for the raffle but admits he just wanted to see me bend over to write tickets and didn't actually WANT the tickets.
Fair enough. I would rather people only enter my raffles/contests if they actually WANT the item to be won. Cool!
A few minutes later, enters a member whom I have never interacted with before nor spoken with on any other occasion. This member has a name that implies they are a female. More specifically, a female whom is interested in other females. Her very first comments in the chat were to the effect of "will you offer these again in the future?" and a little while later, after some comments about some nail polish I was showing off "oh boohoo I'm so sad I don't have any tokens to enter the (22 token) raffle...." I mention that it's ONLY 22 tokens, but that's ok, there will be possibly other opportunities to win similar items in the future.
The rather "new-ish" member, again tipping because he wants to see me bend over and writes tickets, tips for 2 tickets and puts in the tip note "for xyzmember tickets". Not realizing this note was public, I politely PM'd newish member and let him know that I'd rather not do this for a person that I've never spoken to before (since I'll actually be physically sending items to the winner of the raffle) and especially to a person who hasn't contributed a single token. Ever. He completely understood and we went about our business.
Then in chat I see implied-female member thanking newish member and being all excited. As politely as I could, I explained that I would rather not... blah blah just as I had said in the PM to newish member. I really did try my best to make it sound polite and understanding. And being that it was ONLY 22 tokens, that it wasn't a huge deal. I also mentioned that since I didn't know implied-female member, that I didn't even have any idea if they were, in fact, female.
Fast forward a few minutes, and this person starts spouting off about how "she could provide credentials and she hangs out with TONS of other models and I don't have to ban her she would just leave since she's not wanted..."
:?
Then within about 20 minutes I get a LENGTHY MFC mail going on and on and on about similar things and how I made her cry and "doesn't that make you believe I'm really a woman?".
I just... I like to deal with reasonable people. This is unreasonable, in my opinion.
I'm probably just being a little weird and judgmental, and maybe if the item on the raffle was a video or a pic set which is purely digital, I would have reacted differently. But to physically send an item to a person who hasn't even contributed a nickel, let alone proven to be a cool person, I just feel a tad iffy about. If this person had just joined in and tipped to be in the raffle I wouldn't have questioned it. It shows willingness to participate and such. Or if they had been around before and been part of other conversations, I would have felt more comfortable. Hell, there are people who have never tipped who have won/been gifted items in the past that I was excited to send stuff to, but they had been part of the group that visits somewhat frequently, at least. But today, it was an on-the-fly decision I made, and I stand by it, even though I understand some may disagree with it.
SO, here are the 2 questions I'd love some member AND model feedback on:
1a: Models, how do you feel about members "gifting" items that you're raffling off/selling/etc to other members in your room? Is it acceptable if it's people that you're already familiar with, or not at all?
1b: Members, how do you feel about tipping to "gift" items to the other members? Wouldn't it make more sense to just xfer tokens to them and let them tip for it themselves? Is it because you don't trust that the member will use the tokens the way you want them to? If you don't trust another member with xferred tokens, is it then reasonable for the model to not trust this other member with gifted material? Would you require that the member you're gifting to be a regular person in the model's chat room?
2a: Models, do you feel that members who present themselves as females in your room have to behave a certain way to be taken seriously? Do you think you treat members with female names the same as others?
2b: Members, do you get distracted by members in the room who flaunt the fact that they're female? Is it just their name or their behavior that distracts you? Do you feel it's unfair if a model prefers attention not be drawn to the fact that members may be female?
Edit to add: by the way, I only emphasize that this member had a female name because I do feel, in the end, that members who are female end up getting different attention and possibly more "gifted items" than other male members in rooms. Though previously, the female members whom were gifted items in my room were established and awesome members of my regular group of people.