Friendship between a model and a member

[MarieElise]

then you know that it has a finite timeline.

exactly that's the best thing about it. no real long-term commitment, just fun times.
the hard parts are all cut out. well in some cases they are anyway...

 

[misterical]

exactly that's the best thing about it. no real long-term commitment, just fun times.
the hard parts are all cut out. well in some cases they are anyway...

Yeah, exactly that. And the acceptance that it's time boxed and not romantic means that you don't get torn apart by all of the things that ended up tearing the love drunk guys apart. She also doesn't need to ever shout at me for leaving the toilet seat up.

 

[Ozzie_]

I haven't contributed to the actual topic of this thread, mainly because I am comfortable and confident in my friendship with my model friend (the use of these terms for which I make no apologies) but also because she does sometimes read these forums and it is not for me to wax too lyrical about such personal things. I also do not want to encourage any of the misguided guys who might read this thread and decide that if friendship is possible; then so is love. (I am sure it is *possible* but geez it'd be almost as rare as rocking-horse shit)

I have said elsewhere on ACF that I see online friendships as the modern era's version of pen-pals and I believe that way back in the day (even before my time!!!!) some people did even fall in love this way.

As for enjoying the sexual aspect of my interactions with my friend, well I have also said elsewhere that I consider it to be the virtual equivalent of "friends with benefits".

I care for her deeply, but am not looking for anything other than what we have -- a close genuine friendship, a friendship that has given both of us a lot of joy and comfort over the years we have known each other. Our lives would be much poorer if we had never met.

 

[Jay_Storm]

Chiming in again. Had another movie night with a model on Saturday. She set up a password for her room and we watched a dumb horror movie. And then talked about dumb shit for a while. No money was exchanged. Feels kinda friendly.

 

[misterical]

Hmm, a month on from the last post. Still here doing the friendship thing. She's recently moved into a new place along with two housemates - also cam models. They've moved out of the studio and into working from home which has been quite an interesting thing to watch unfold. Stressful as well though from what I can see. We've moved a lot of our conversations over to Whatsapp now. Still on good terms, and to the best of my knowledge neither of us has fallen in love with the other. On reflection though, I think we're probably the exception rather than the rule. There are a lot of opportunities in a situation like this to make wrong decisions, get too attached, get hurt or possibly just become a nuisance. Been interesting to go back and read this post again in light of some other posts that have appeared in the interim.

 

[mira_leo]

Does your model friend know you post about her on an internet forum? If not, how do you think she would feel about it if she knew?

 

[ArcticKitty]

Hmm, a month on from the last post. Still here doing the friendship thing. She's recently moved into a new place along with two housemates - also cam models. They've moved out of the studio and into working from home which has been quite an interesting thing to watch unfold. Stressful as well though from what I can see. We've moved a lot of our conversations over to Whatsapp now. Still on good terms, and to the best of my knowledge neither of us has fallen in love with the other. On reflection though, I think we're probably the exception rather than the rule. There are a lot of opportunities in a situation like this to make wrong decisions, get too attached, get hurt or possibly just become a nuisance. Been interesting to go back and read this post again in light of some other posts that have appeared in the interim.

Well, I'm happy for you.

 

[misterical]

Does your model friend know you post about her on an internet forum? If not, how do you think she would feel about it if she knew?

She knows I've asked for advice on her behalf here before. Although, it seems a bit of an unfair question. There are literally entire threads here about customers and what they get up to. As long as nobody is identifiable then surely no harm done. I'd like to think I've always been positive when posting about things.

 

[misterical]

Well, I'm happy for you.

You were entirely right though. These kind of things have the potential to be messy and should probably not be embarked upon. I'll take what we have as one of those happy accidents but if it ended tomorrow, I probably wouldn't seek out another such friendship.

 

[Marceline]

Although, it seems a bit of an unfair question. There are literally entire threads here about customers and what they get up to.

Making one or two comments about wacky things members have done or said, or even the nice things, isn’t the same as making an entire thread talking about one particular person and bringing them up frequently.

It’s one thing to bring up your friend if it’s relevant to an ongoing conversation. That’s totally normal and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. It’s something entirely different when you keep bringing them up. I can’t speak for any other model, but I know when I read stuff like this I put myself a little into the shoes of the person who is being discussed. I’d be very uncomfortable if anyone I knew or was friends with made an entire thread about our friendship, then felt the need to update on our friendship after a month. It seems almost obsessive.

Which leaves me with the question, what is the point of it? Most adults don’t need guidelines or tips on how to maintain their friendships (which was what your original post was). And the wackadoos who sometimes come here looking for validation or whatever when they develop unhealthy attachments to a performer don’t need any extra encouragement.

 

[flexxxforus]

As long as there's money involved it's going to be a weird dynamic between a model and a member.

Personally, I have nearly daily conversations with one of my most watched/tipped models off site and weekly gaming sessions. There's clear enjoyment on both sides and I got really lucky finding a model who's into the same nerdy shit. Wouldn't be surprised if most model/member friendships are lacking a lot of similar interests.

But I'm fatalistic about the relationship. I know if I stop tipping the conversations will become a rarer occurrence but won't stop completely.

 

[rockin_rod]

No money was exchanged.

Outside of work time then?

 

[Jay_Storm]

Outside of work time then?

Yes. She is an independent model and it seemed easier to hang out in a password room.

 

[InannahQoH]

Chiming in again. Had another movie night with a model on Saturday. She set up a password for her room and we watched a dumb horror movie. And then talked about dumb shit for a while. No money was exchanged. Feels kinda friendly.

You have it easy..
I fell in love with a model who.. is a $3500 plane flight away, and doesn't speak English. hahaha
But we have had a good ~12 hours a day / almost every day.. relationship for almost 2 years now.
Including 3 months living with her recently.

 

[InannahQoH]

Does your model friend know you post about her on an internet forum? If not, how do you think she would feel about it if she knew?

For me.. Yes.

 

[misterical]

Making one or two comments about wacky things members have done or said, or even the nice things, isn’t the same as making an entire thread talking about one particular person and bringing them up frequently.

It’s one thing to bring up your friend if it’s relevant to an ongoing conversation. That’s totally normal and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. It’s something entirely different when you keep bringing them up. I can’t speak for any other model, but I know when I read stuff like this I put myself a little into the shoes of the person who is being discussed. I’d be very uncomfortable if anyone I knew or was friends with made an entire thread about our friendship, then felt the need to update on our friendship after a month. It seems almost obsessive.

Which leaves me with the question, what is the point of it? Most adults don’t need guidelines or tips on how to maintain their friendships (which was what your original post was). And the wackadoos who sometimes come here looking for validation or whatever when they develop unhealthy attachments to a performer don’t need any extra encouragement.

I'm not trying to be weird. Like most humans, I want to be able to talk about what is happening in my life, and about friends etc but there are very few places where I can go and talk about a situation like this without being pilloried or criticised/condemned. So as a result, I probably post here about it a bit too vigorously. It's not something you'd bring up in normal conversation with a friend who doesn't understand the cam world. It's not even something I can really wrap my head around and I've been visiting cam sites for years without ever developing any kind of relationship with anyone. And now I'm worried because tonight she has to make a dangerous journey across a notorious border crossing, at night, on foot, alone and I'm sitting here wondering whether I even have the right to be worried because the cam world instills those doubts at every turn. All of these things are so far removed from the kind of conversations I could have with anyone in any other area of my life than on this forum.

So I can appreciate how all of this comes across but it's not meant to sound obsessive, it's just weird when you have a whole section of your life that you can't discuss with the other people in your life so I definitely overcompensate here.

 

[InannahQoH]

I'm not trying to be weird. Like most humans, I want to be able to talk about what is happening in my life, and about friends etc but there are very few places where I can go and talk about a situation like this without being pilloried or criticised/condemned. So as a result, I probably post here about it a bit too vigorously. It's not something you'd bring up in normal conversation with a friend who doesn't understand the cam world. I can appreciate how it comes across though.

It might depend on who's being talked about, as well..
Most people are fairly private..

Some broadcast 6 hours a day, and spend the other 12 hours ...
This is what I'm eating now / this is where I am now / this is what I'm doing now.. Every 15 minutes. : )

 

[misterical]

Also, like most things in life when you look back on them, my initial post that started this thread doesn't make comfortable reading now but that's life (and hindsight) I suppose.

 

[InannahQoH]

Also, like most things in life when you look back on them, my initial post that started this thread doesn't make comfortable reading now but that's life (and hindsight) I suppose.

Reads fine to me. but then again I'm probably whacky.

Out of interest.

1. I don't camp IN GF's room, I and watch every minute of every broadcast.. while logged out
When I log into her room, she knows its because I want to play / and I get treated like every one else in her room.
Except if/when someone pays, I'll go quiet and let her earn.

2. Colombian agencies usually use "monitors"...
She grew up with a monitor assisting her. So its common for her to pm me out of platform with..
"What is he asking for? / What did he pay for? / what's he saying?" etc etc
Because its fairly common for the translator to not be able to translate some of the slang that is used when English speak to her..
So we have a back and forth me helping her (translations / etc) throughout all of her broadcasts.
She's said a lot of times, if I didn't help her with that, she would pay a monitor (20%) to assist her in the broadcasts.
+ I'll log in as moderator and ban / etc when needed / A lot of the time the translator doesn't pick up when someone's being insulting / rude / etc

>>and about friends etc but there are very few places where I can go and talk about a situation like this without being pilloried or criticised/condemned
3. Depends, I'm very public with my situation..
My family, mother, wife, children, my employment, boss, HR, etc etc all know my situation. And I don't care / they don't seem to care either..
They know shes less than 1/2 my age, and what her job is, etc etc..
They all have her real details / address / contact details / phone number / etc etc ..
And the girlfriend has all of my family / employer / etc's contact details..
But also mainly because they needed to know how to contact me / etc if I disappeared when I was living in Colombia with her / and for emergencies etc.

I did get warned by my work a year ago..
But that was because someone at work (in a overseas office) googled her name.. While they were in a full office with a lot of people around in eyesight of his monitor (Which filled his screen with porn)
But i just told HR to stfu, and i've had no other issues with work since.. in fact the opposite, since work allowed me to go live in Colombia and work from Colombia..
And then work changed my employment records to "xxxxx can work anywhere in the world, and we don't care where he is, or which country he works in"
To allow me the back and forth to the GF's whenever I want to.

 

[misterical]

Reads fine to me. but then again I'm probably whacky.

Out of interest.

1. I don't camp IN GF's room, I and watch every minute of every broadcast.. while logged out
When I log into her room, she knows its because I want to play / and I get treated like every one else in her room.
Except if/when someone pays, I'll go quiet and let her earn.

2. Colombian agencies usually use "monitors"...
She grew up with a monitor assisting her. So its common for her to pm me out of platform with..
"What is he asking for? / What did he pay for? / what's he saying?" etc etc
Because its fairly common for the translator to not be able to translate some of the slang that is used when English speak to her..
So we have a back and forth me helping her (translations / etc) throughout all of her broadcasts.
She's said a lot of times, if I didn't help her with that, she would pay a monitor (20%) to assist her in the broadcasts.
+ I'll log in as moderator and ban / etc when needed / A lot of the time the translator doesn't pick up when someone's being insulting / rude / etc

>>and about friends etc but there are very few places where I can go and talk about a situation like this without being pilloried or criticised/condemned
3. Depends, I'm very public with my situation..
My family, mother, wife, children, my employment, boss, HR, etc etc all know my situation. And I don't care / they don't seem to care either..
They know shes less than 1/2 my age, and what her job is, etc etc..
They all have her real details / address / contact details / phone number / etc etc ..
And the girlfriend has all of my family / employer / etc's contact details..
But also mainly because they needed to know how to contact me / etc if I disappeared when I was living in Colombia with her / and for emergencies etc.

I did get warned by my work a year ago..
But that was because someone at work (in a overseas office) googled her name.. While they were in a full office with a lot of people around in eyesight of his monitor (Which filled his screen with porn)
But i just told HR to stfu, and i've had no other issues with work since.. in fact the opposite, since work allowed me to go live in Colombia and work from Colombia..
And then work changed my employment records to "xxxxx can work anywhere in the world, and we don't care where he is, or which country he works in"
To allow me the back and forth to the GF's whenever I want to.

To be fair, I think your situation is significantly different from most. I pop in, chat for a while, then leave. She's not a girlfriend and I don't get involved in the running of her room. I have no desire to either. The original post doesn't read fine to me anymore. It's a bit cringey. Live and learn though.

 

[cbhours]

Because its fairly common for the translator to not be able to translate some of the slang that is used when English speak to her..
So we have a back and forth me helping her (translations / etc) throughout all of her broadcasts.
She's said a lot of times, if I didn't help her with that, she would pay a monitor (20%) to assist her in the broadcasts.
+ I'll log in as moderator and ban / etc when needed / A lot of the time the translator doesn't pick up when someone's being insulting / rude / etc

Is she using only qtranslate? she may have better results copying and pasting text to google translate first before reaching out to you. I don't know what scenarios its better like that I only know that it does help sometimes.

 

[InannahQoH]

Is she using only qtranslate? she may have better results copying and pasting text to google translate first before reaching out to you. I don't know what scenarios its better like that I only know that it does help sometimes.

She doesn't use google translate, and I cant remember the name of the one she does use on the computer browser.
But since she's working and busy, I type to her in Spanish and i use google.

And I'm always going English -> Spanish -> English to make sure it still makes sense. And 1/3 of the time it doesn't, so I have to reword it / test again.
And Spanish seems very bad with he/she/i/we/you/me etc.. So i have to type like a baby.. INA did this, INA said that, and avoid the words that usually cause issues.

But its usually the slang.. like for example, 'I wish we could spoon"..
And translators will take it as knife/fork spoon,, instead of a cuddle in bed.

With google
'I wish we could spoon" -> Spanish = "Ojalá pudiéramos cucharear"

And then...

cucharear

• exagerate, to Verb
• boast, to Verb (boasts; boasted; boasting)
• brag, to Verb (brags; bragged; bragging)
• talk big, to Verb (talks big; talked big; talking big)

The translator's a pain in the ass : )

+ shes very active in broadcast, usually twerking / dancing / fucking / etc...
So KB use and messing with translators in a spamming chatroom, while performing, isn't easy either.

 

[cbhours]

With google
'I wish we could spoon" -> Spanish = "Ojalá pudiéramos cucharear"

that translation is correct

 

[InannahQoH]

that translation is correct

You recommend google translate as the better one to use?

 

[cbhours]

You recommend google translate as the better one to use?

deepl might be better because of the way it shows quick alternatives but i havent tested it much. I know several models swear by it for other languages.

 

[ArcticKitty]

I'm not trying to be weird. Like most humans, I want to be able to talk about what is happening in my life, and about friends etc but there are very few places where I can go and talk about a situation like this without being pilloried or criticised/condemned. So as a result, I probably post here about it a bit too vigorously. It's not something you'd bring up in normal conversation with a friend who doesn't understand the cam world. It's not even something I can really wrap my head around and I've been visiting cam sites for years without ever developing any kind of relationship with anyone. And now I'm worried because tonight she has to make a dangerous journey across a notorious border crossing, at night, on foot, alone and I'm sitting here wondering whether I even have the right to be worried because the cam world instills those doubts at every turn. All of these things are so far removed from the kind of conversations I could have with anyone in any other area of my life than on this forum.

So I can appreciate how all of this comes across but it's not meant to sound obsessive, it's just weird when you have a whole section of your life that you can't discuss with the other people in your life so I definitely overcompensate here.

That's understandable, misterical. I don't tell people that I sometimes chat in adult cam rooms either, not that there's anything wrong with it or that I would be ashamed if anyone knew. Straight up, limited time available both for me and many of my friends, or sometimes I'm just not feeling up to going out. I'm certainly not the only shy bi out there who is on mfc for similar reasons.


Edit: Random: I had a wonderful time online last night! I was at a party and giving out candy with my neighbours and it rained. So I came home early and logged in to see a model who returned to cam from a hiatus and I was soo happy to see her and catch up because she's sweet, very intelligent and interesting and pretty.

 

[inertvolcano]

deepl might be better because of the way it shows quick alternatives but i havent tested it much. I know several models swear by it for other languages.

I recommend deepl. I use it when communicating with Spanish speaking relatives and one nice feature it has is it offers multiple different translations to help you get a better answer of what you're saying.

 

[blayze_noir]

+1 DeepL

 

[misterical]

That's understandable, misterical. I don't tell people that I sometimes chat in adult cam rooms either, not that there's anything wrong with it or that I would be ashamed if anyone knew. Straight up, limited time available both for me and many of my friends, or sometimes I'm just not feeling up to going out. I'm certainly not the only shy bi out there who is on mfc for similar reasons.


Edit: Random: I had a wonderful time online last night! I was at a party and giving out candy with my neighbours and it rained. So I came home early and logged in to see a model who returned to cam from a hiatus and I was soo happy to see her and catch up because she's sweet, very intelligent and interesting and pretty.

I wouldn't necessarily be ashamed of it either, but people are weird and it's just not worth the hassle. Besides, as soon as you explain that you have a friendship with a cam model everyone immediately assumed you are being scammed (I'm not). It's just way too much grief to be putting up with, which is why it's easier to talk about it here - even given the fact that people here can be sceptical enough about it (with good reason at times).

 

[misterical]

I recommend deepl. I use it when communicating with Spanish speaking relatives and one nice feature it has is it offers multiple different translations to help you get a better answer of what you're saying.

We communicate using Whatsapp with the inbuilt translator on Google Keyboard. It seems to work well however my responses are in Spanish and hers in English although each of us actually types in the opposite language. It has it's limitations - translations have a character limit for instance and it has an annoying habit of not capitalising the first letter in a sentence. By far the biggest challenge though is reading the conversation back at a later date. I can understand everything she has typed but I have no idea what I was banging on about because it's all in Spanish.