So this is only the reality for models in countries like Colombia, Is that really what you are saying? Where is your empathy for people struggling in more "developed" parts of the world?
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Friendship between a model and a member
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Bro the issue is you're generalizing out the handful of cam models you know to all cam models. The cam models you know are successful so all cam models are successful, and the ones who say they're not are lying. I don't know you but maybe it's the circles you move in. Like I really doubt you've spent time in Bello talking to the cam models who live there. I just can tell you for facts that there are Colombian cam models who are struggling, and some of the ones who work for studios are scraping by because they can't afford their own equipment or a stable internet connection, and the studio takes half their money and gives them as little as they can in return. And that includes any kind of support or oversight from monitors.
Well I clicked on this thread because it was just so weird! In all seriousness I just don't get it with guys wanting a "friendship" with a model or referring to a model as their friend in posts. As I've said earlier, I find it disturbing.
And please, PLEASE, before I get a flood of replies from guys protesting my remarks in this and my post earlier today, YES I KNOW THAT YOU CAN GENUINELY LIKE SOMEONE YOU MET IN A CAMSITE ROOM.
No, never said anything like that. Do you have reading comprehension problems? if so, I am sorry, I don't mean to disparage, merely looking for context.
I have empathy for people struggling everywhere. On this I can "multi-task". My experience, such as it is, however lies more with Latin America, and of course my home country. Does this ability not occur to you? Are you so emotionally stunted that you can only care for one "set" of people at a time?
So just as much as the some of the other dudes on this forum. Neat.
MarieElise
Cam Model
- Dec 19, 2019
- 9,849
- 17,766
- 211
- Twitter Username
- @EliMarie717
- MFC Username
- EliMarie
- Streamate Username
- MarieElise
- ManyVids URL
- https://www.manyvids.com/Profile/328205/EliMarie717/
- Clips4Sale URL
- https://www.clips4sale.com/studio/92217/marie717
Finally, someone said it, I thought I was going to have to.
Maybe this dude socializes in wealthy circles where he's exposed to the higher earning individuals of this and other societies, but that doesn't mean what he sees is the norm or average
One definitely shouldn't believe every sad story they hear. But con people, and sociopaths do make up less than 10% of the general population. So again, I circle back to the cognitive error of over generalization. Dont lump every bastard in with each other, it pisses everyone off, and rightly so
It's named a cognitive distortion for a reason. It's not correct, although it is one of the most common cognitive distortions we all tend to make (unless we put conscious effort and work into not doing so).
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Some very interesting perspectives.
Caused me to look up the M-W dictionary definition of 'friend' - https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/friend
While I have my own thoughts on the OP's thread, I don't feel I have any right to question someone's belief that they are friends with anyone, especially given the wide range of coverage that defines 'friend' in the above link.
What I do think is pertinent though is the difference between becoming friends with somebody over time, and seeking to befriend a particular person - and in that case, what is the motivation for that.
Caused me to look up the M-W dictionary definition of 'friend' - https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/friend
While I have my own thoughts on the OP's thread, I don't feel I have any right to question someone's belief that they are friends with anyone, especially given the wide range of coverage that defines 'friend' in the above link.
What I do think is pertinent though is the difference between becoming friends with somebody over time, and seeking to befriend a particular person - and in that case, what is the motivation for that.
So what I’m gathering from some of the last few posts is this.
If during the course of visiting a lot of cam models as a customer, you happen to believe you made a friend here or there, you are (check all that apply):
— weird and off-putting
— disturbing
— less respectable than the “show ass bb” dudes
— incorrect about friendship
— dishonest about your true ambitions
— here to brag about it
— probably being swindled
— white-knighting
Well then. Thanks for the real talk, I guess?
Honestly, I happened to make like two (2) friends over the course of many years, visiting countless rooms as a customer. If that makes me any of the above, I respect your opinion.
Likewise, I hope you respect my opinion that you’re unfairly lumping the good members in with the very worst of examples that often stumble in here love-drunk after a desperate Google search. I don’t appreciate being conflated with those types, and I don’t think I deserve it, but it’s whatever.
If during the course of visiting a lot of cam models as a customer, you happen to believe you made a friend here or there, you are (check all that apply):
— weird and off-putting
— disturbing
— less respectable than the “show ass bb” dudes
— incorrect about friendship
— dishonest about your true ambitions
— here to brag about it
— probably being swindled
— white-knighting
Well then. Thanks for the real talk, I guess?
Honestly, I happened to make like two (2) friends over the course of many years, visiting countless rooms as a customer. If that makes me any of the above, I respect your opinion.
Likewise, I hope you respect my opinion that you’re unfairly lumping the good members in with the very worst of examples that often stumble in here love-drunk after a desperate Google search. I don’t appreciate being conflated with those types, and I don’t think I deserve it, but it’s whatever.
Exactly this. I've made precisely one friend in 7 years of visiting cam sites. I've never had any interest in being friendly with a model prior to now and I've no intention of adding to my list of friends. Like you, I've visited a lot of rooms in my time. Never once crossed my mind. Sometimes you just click with someone. I'm sure somebody will be along in a minute to tell me that that's what she is selling, but then so were all the other models and I didn't click with them.
I think it's a little sad that there isn't any room for nuance here. The suggestion that two people can't have a connection in a medium that is designed for human connection is incredibly strange to me. Or if they do, then one of them must be a weirdo or the other a swindler. As for the suggestion that every guy who becomes friendly with a model is "back tattoo guy lite" and secretly desires an in person relationship with the model might be true in some instances but not all, and certainly not in my case. It's the last thing I want. Yes, it's a weird medium to conduct a friendship but it's not impossible, nor is jumping between the sexual and platonic elements of it. If she finds me "weird and offputting" then I'm sure she won't be backward in coming forwards and telling me.
MarieElise
Cam Model
- Dec 19, 2019
- 9,849
- 17,766
- 211
- Twitter Username
- @EliMarie717
- MFC Username
- EliMarie
- Streamate Username
- MarieElise
- ManyVids URL
- https://www.manyvids.com/Profile/328205/EliMarie717/
- Clips4Sale URL
- https://www.clips4sale.com/studio/92217/marie717
I got told by a man once that my job "was to be quiet and sit at home waiting to receive him when he got done with work". I'm sure you can imagine how that went down, knowing my firey personality. And it wasn't in the context of fetish roleplay or anything, he actually meant it!I broke up with a dude (for various reasons) who literally blurted out to me “You’ve gotta understand that I’m a MAN, so I’m superior.”And he tried to act like he “didn’t really mean it like that.” Um…how the fuck did you mean it then?
Receive my ass!
ETA; Add to that he wasn't paying any of my bills with the money he got from working! Some dudes are on some good shit, that's for sure! I'm glad there are others who aren't totally whack!
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I broke up with a dude (for various reasons) who literally blurted out to me “You’ve gotta understand that I’m a MAN, so I’m superior.”
On an intellectual level I have always known that there are guys like this out there. But it still never ceases to shock me when I am actually presented with the reality like this.
MarieElise
Cam Model
- Dec 19, 2019
- 9,849
- 17,766
- 211
- Twitter Username
- @EliMarie717
- MFC Username
- EliMarie
- Streamate Username
- MarieElise
- ManyVids URL
- https://www.manyvids.com/Profile/328205/EliMarie717/
- Clips4Sale URL
- https://www.clips4sale.com/studio/92217/marie717
You and me both. I tackled him down, gave him a titty twister, and made him giggle like a schoolgirlBut it still never ceases to shock me when I am actually presented with the reality like this.
Since my post had a lot of these key words in it let me clarify.
It's weird and off-putting when someone feels the need to overanalyze a friendship to the point where they have to make a huge post saying how it is they make their friendship work. I'd say the same thing to someone who went to these lengths over an in person friendship as well. I'm not saying it's necessarily obsessive behavior, but it's certainly not how people should act in normal, healthy friendships.
I can respect people who are honest about their intentions with going to camsites. I think it's disingenuous when guys are like "I only go to camsites to learn about different cultures". Because going to a site where hot ladies do sexy things for money is totally the place to go to learn about a different culture. It just sounds like the people who say that are trying to sound superior to dudes who go to camsites to jerk off, even though I'd bet my left titty anyone who says that has also jerked off to the same women they are just trying to "get to know". So yeah, it's a bit dishonest. Yeah, I get that there's guys who are looking for chats and a community (it's especially common with MFC), but to act like there's no sexual reason added in with that is absurd.
I'm not saying friendships can't be formed. However, if you feel the need to make a huge in depth post about your friendship, it's weird (like I stated before) and it also doesn't come off as genuine. It also does come off as a brag.
I'm sorry that you felt like I was conflating you with some of the out of touch guys that start the "in love with a cam model" threads. I'm well aware there are good cam site members out there. When I still cammed I had a good group of regulars who I was friendly with and a few guys I talked to outside of MFC who I knew were good people. And I'll just say, none of those guys were making a huge deal out of our online friendship. As far as I know, none of them felt the need to constantly talk about me on a cam forum. Unlike OP, who my post was mainly directed at. If I found out someone I was friendly with or genuine friends with posted about me like that, I'd be weirded out and would take a big step back from them. But hey, that's just me. I just don't think some people realize, or perhaps care, that this is a public forum when they post about another person, more than likely without their consent.
And also, I don't think any of that is on the same level as the back tattoo guys and the guys who go to other countries to legit stalk women. That should go without saying.
Interesting thread, lots of digressions.
I've been "friendly" with a couple of models over the years. I see it as the same as a work friend that I never socialize with outside work. It doesn't occur to me to be concerned about what they do in their off time and unless they work for me I don't care what they do on work time. I see it as somewhere between an acquaintance and a friend. I care what happens to them on a large scale but not on a micro scale. I can enjoy talking to them and I'm interested in what they say. I don't think a lot about them when they're not around but I would be willing to listen to them and help them solve a problem if they asked, within reason and most likely not involving money. I'm polite, respectful and sociable and we can have a lot of fun interacting and joking but at the end of the day they go their way and I go mine. I think the best way to phrase it is that I am fond of them and enjoy their company when they're around but don't really miss it when they aren't.
I probably feel closer to some of the posters on here and some other forums than I would with someone based just on cam interactions. To be honest sometimes the forums are more fun too. For example I really would miss Audri's posts if they stopped. I've gotten some great laughs from her comments, same with some others. I've also learned a lot about how people think and seen things from other points of view that I've found to be very valuable.
I've been "friendly" with a couple of models over the years. I see it as the same as a work friend that I never socialize with outside work. It doesn't occur to me to be concerned about what they do in their off time and unless they work for me I don't care what they do on work time. I see it as somewhere between an acquaintance and a friend. I care what happens to them on a large scale but not on a micro scale. I can enjoy talking to them and I'm interested in what they say. I don't think a lot about them when they're not around but I would be willing to listen to them and help them solve a problem if they asked, within reason and most likely not involving money. I'm polite, respectful and sociable and we can have a lot of fun interacting and joking but at the end of the day they go their way and I go mine. I think the best way to phrase it is that I am fond of them and enjoy their company when they're around but don't really miss it when they aren't.
I probably feel closer to some of the posters on here and some other forums than I would with someone based just on cam interactions. To be honest sometimes the forums are more fun too. For example I really would miss Audri's posts if they stopped. I've gotten some great laughs from her comments, same with some others. I've also learned a lot about how people think and seen things from other points of view that I've found to be very valuable.
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Thinking back on it, over the last decade I made quite a few online friends with other users on many camsites.
Even though some of them don't actually go on cam sites anymore, we still BS with each other on a regular basis. A few days ago I was face timing with an online friend that I met on CAM4 in 2013 while I was shopping for a new computer monitor. He was helping me pick one out since he's a tech nerd.
As shocking as it is to some with the notion that a user can never be actual online friends with broadcasters..... It actually does happen.
Those users just do not brag to the world about it like it's some badge of honor.
D
Deleted member 64633
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Replying below. Lol.As for whether she's physically attracted to me or not, could any model who has actually told an ugly guy that he is ugly please reply below
I suspect I'd get the same feedback from her whether I looked like Brad Pitt or Sloth from the Goonies. Personally, I'm confident enough that I'm OK looking but 99% of the time I'm just words on a screen anyway.
I'm not sure what I would call it but "friend" is just the easiest way to describe the relationship I guess. I have only become friendly and familiar with one model. Honestly I don't really go on unless it's when she's on now. She is funny and charming. There are a bunch of good regulars that make things fun. We have a good rapport. Occasionally we chat outside of work. But there's still that customer/service relationship. So I don't know what you would call it.
I get it. Camming is a personal thing, of course. And anyone can be friends.
To clarify from my perspective, I don't have any opinion about friendships with models. I winced at this thread because the OP is a monograph that describes and endorses what reads like a quasi-romantic relationship. I'm sorry, that's just off.
Don't get me wrong, there certainly are models I like and who like me. But that's just what it is. I really can't put it any better than that.
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OK, here's how I see it with models, FWIW: almost as if her room was her bar or cafe and she's working.
FWIW. Everyone who I pissed off here can take this as they like.
FWIW. Everyone who I pissed off here can take this as they like.
I should probably chime back in and say that this is the exact description of what I have at the moment. I use the word "friend" because there's not another word that adequately describes it.
I agree, I may have waxed a bit lyrical in the original post because I wanted to promote discussion. I know people have said that there should be no need to overthink a friendship so much but the reality is that it's being conducted in a pretty fucking weird medium so there is a lot to be considered - another reason for getting a bit carried away in the analysis. I'd wager pretty much most offline friendships between men and women don't occur when one person is working or where there are a dozen other guys shouting out "show ass pls" etc etc. It's unusual and needs some consideration.
I've been concerned a few times that it could be a "quasi-romantic" relationship, (bit worried I might be the Quasi part - as in Quasimodo). Every time, I've reached the conclusion that the slightest suggestion of it turning into an in person relationship would result in me fleeing in fear. It's fine the way it is. But yes, there is a transactional and sexual element to it and I'm fine with that. I'm able to switch between the two types of relationship easily. I mean, people in real life relationships switch between platonic, romantic and sexual all the time.
I've been visiting cam sites for 7 years and never once befriended a model before now and have no desire to befriend any more. So, I appreciate it might look weird and like I'm settling for one thing in the hope of getting something more, but all I can do is assure you that I'm definitely not.
MarieElise
Cam Model
- Dec 19, 2019
- 9,849
- 17,766
- 211
- Twitter Username
- @EliMarie717
- MFC Username
- EliMarie
- Streamate Username
- MarieElise
- ManyVids URL
- https://www.manyvids.com/Profile/328205/EliMarie717/
- Clips4Sale URL
- https://www.clips4sale.com/studio/92217/marie717
Ha ha no. It's not the model that's scary. It's the upheaval to my life. I'm too old for that starting over shit.Virgo?
Cam models scary... never
I think the strangest thing with this kind of friendship in this medium is that if you are a realist (and I am, the back tattoo types probably aren't) then you know that it has a finite timeline. One day it will end. I'm alright with that. I think it will hurt both of us but it won't feel like a romantic breakup. It will be the chat and humour that we will miss.
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