So here's an anecdote, relevant to the thread, to maybe ground some of the things I've talked about in. There's a model I know who I ended up moving to talking to offsite. It started how you'd expect but ended up shifting gradually to talking about our families, parenthood, spirituality, and the fact that we both suffer from similar mental illnesses. We chat, at least a little bit, almost every day.
There was a time, months ago at this point, that I was physically assaulted in my own home. It's a long story and I don't want to get into the details, but I had reason to fear for my safety and I ended up spending the night at a hotel. I was freaked out and fucked up about it, and she sent me a little check in message so I told her what happened. She called me and kept me company until I was more relaxed and able to fall asleep. I was and still am stunned that she would do that for me.
Recently for one of her kids' birthdays, she didn't know what to get him. I made a suggestion of a toy I knew was popular for kids that age. She video called me from his birthday so I could see how excited he was about it.
We met in person once, briefly, and it was a nice time. I don't know when or if it will ever happen again, but it's a nice memory for both of us.
There's more but you get the idea. I take everyone's warnings and concerns in here to heart, and, you know, who knows where it will end up or how long it will last. But it doesn't really matter whether it's a friendship or not. It's been a blessing to me in a dark time, and she tells me I've been the same to her. Maybe it's just two strangers keeping each other company for a while. But she, and our relationship, whatever it is, have been precious to me. Everything else, I'm working out in therapy.
After a lot of reflection and reading this thread I think the problem for me, and this isn't just an issue with OP (misterical I think you're a good-hearted person who means well) but with my earlier comments as well which I feel really embarrassed about now, is how it reads like a model is some kind of exotic pet you need special instructions to know how take care of. If you've truly befriended someone who is a model, then they're your friend... who also happens to be a model. It doesn't require any special consideration beyond what you would give any other friendship you have in your life. But if you're still going to their room, tipping, going for privates, buying wishlist items, etc. you have a business relationship first and foremost and anything else is getting ahead of yourself.
As always, thanks to the models in this forum who gently and not so gently guide us dopey dudes towards the light and put up with our presence here.