Cute ways to say "I don't meet clients"

[maryjanebang]

and other things clients don't want to hear!

Main one on my mind atm is "I don't meet clients". I'd love cutesier ways to say that for starters (I can be *very* firm by default but I'd like to be very firm and cute!)

 

[EmptyKins]

Try this:
I once met a member like you.
We arranged a rendevous.
Simple setting, brunch for two.
He wore pink.
I wore blue.
He was sweating.
I smelled of glue.
Both of our entrees tasted like poo.
My coupon expired, his card declined, we both tried hiding in the loo.
"I'm allergic to glue", he whispered.
"I like you too", I misheard.
We escaped out of the window.
He never called me back.
I still have his shoe.
I'm sorry, stranger, but meeting you will just not do.

 

[JickyJuly]

I used to use Bob Dylan for everything when I was still on MFC.
"I only take pay pal from Bob Dylan."
"Discounts for Bob Dylan only!"
"No Skype unless you're Bob Dylan."
Normal members will accept this. Habitual moochers will pretend not to understand, continue whining..

 

[CoffeeKnight]

Maybe I'm just in an aggressive mood because of real life things at the moment, but I wouldn't cutesy that up or anything else that crosses boundaries. I would be both firm and clear that there will be no client meetups. You don't have to be mean about it but don't sprinkle sugar on it either. These boards are full of sad lonely people that delude themselves into thinking they have a special relationship with models and in their minds they would probably read your humor as an invitation to continue asking.

Any member that would ask to meet a model probably has a screw loose anyway so you need to shut it down hard and fast. Just my two cents.

 

[ThePrincessLuxy]

"I don't meet clients" is pretty cute

 

[Majora Mink]

Truthfully, I've had tons of internet friends my whole life- meeting them back in my 20's was always fun and innocent. But since being in my 30's, somehow any meeting of an internet friend or an acquaintance (that ever had a hint of flirting) turns into an awful kind of... just... no.

Internet-me and real-person-me are pretty indistinguishable, but that line is there and that's that. I basically say as much to my viewers anyway- though I think many viewers also just like to talk about "when we meet" in a very fantasy-like way... and different cultures also have different "literal-ness" to their chats, perhaps? The majority of folks who bring it up haven't spent much time to get to know me anyway and likely won't carry out any actual meeting plans, or aren't big tippers to begin with and likely can't afford to travel to/pay for me to do so.

(Mind you, I'm not encouraging this talk either- I don't make any promises, but I naturally turn the subject into just generic travel-talk. If stuff gets personal like that, make it generic. I think it's enough for a viewer to get the hint and turn them away if that was the only thing they were angling for.)

 

[MiaFoxUK]

how about shhhhhh the fbi is listening

but no is a complete answer, and never forget that

 

[SaffronBurke]

Depends on my mood, but I use any of the following:

"I am comprised entirely of pixels and do not have a corporeal body, ergo that is not possible."

"I don't exist outside the internet"

"I don't offer that"

"Nope."

 

[Fatquack]

Like this:
Idon'tmeetclients

 

[maryjanebang]

Thanks to everyone who said some version of "Just no is perfect".

 

[maryjanebang]

Maybe I'm just in an aggressive mood because of real life things at the moment, but I wouldn't cutesy that up or anything else that crosses boundaries. I would be both firm and clear that there will be no client meetups. You don't have to be mean about it but don't sprinkle sugar on it either. These boards are full of sad lonely people that delude themselves into thinking they have a special relationship with models and in their minds they would probably read your humor as an invitation to continue asking.

Any member that would ask to meet a model probably has a screw loose anyway so you need to shut it down hard and fast. Just my two cents.

I love this! Thank you I don't think you're just being aggressive.

 

[LaceyRoyce]

If it's on mfc it's against the rules and they are monitoring pms (I got a warning for joking about marriage for tokens. The member did too) so that's an easy out.

 

[NoelleBright]

It's against the rules on all camsites based in the USA now. On Streamate we have to mark check boxes agreeing that we won't give out personal information or attempt to meet members every single time we open our streaming page.

I've found that tone matters a lot more than the way you're actually wording it.

 

[AudriTwo]

I act like they are being too much.

"Ugh why do you have to make it complicated? Can't you just masturbate to me now? That is what I only want to do."

"How about you stay at the comfort of your own home, and I stay at mine. Wanna masturbate to me now?"

 

[Poison_Ivy21]

"Oh I could get in so much trouble for that! You wouldn't want me to lose my job, would you??"

 

[Mila_]

"I am not an escort, sorry" is also a good answer.

 

[Moffle]

Maybe I'm just in an aggressive mood because of real life things at the moment, but I wouldn't cutesy that up or anything else that crosses boundaries. I would be both firm and clear that there will be no client meetups. You don't have to be mean about it but don't sprinkle sugar on it either. These boards are full of sad lonely people that delude themselves into thinking they have a special relationship with models and in their minds they would probably read your humor as an invitation to continue asking.

Any member that would ask to meet a model probably has a screw loose anyway so you need to shut it down hard and fast. Just my two cents.

Have to say I totally agree, any attempt to make it cute or softer would surely just leave the matter open to interpretation. I struggle to understand what kind of person would ask that for real but then I struggle to understand most of the total muppet comments I see from complete morons, they make me think "what are you like in real life and how have you been allowed to exist". Guess I'm grumpy too! Bah! Toothache does that.

 

[eyeteach]

As a lowly member, I find that saying, "Please leave me the fuck alone" works wonders.

 

[Emberblaze]

I usually say things like "Are you a fucking idiot? You realize you're on a cam site right?"

But I'm pretty cute so it's still cute. At least that's what I tell myself as my room empties.

 

[MojitosJourney]

I just would avoid using the word “client” if you want to be cute about it. These members who want to meet probably consider you a friend or see you as date / wife material and if you say no AND call them a client, it’s a double blow.

I say ...
“For safety reasons, I don’t meet anyone in person that I have met online. Except at conventions - I’ll be at x convention x month, you’re welcome to come by the MFC booth and say hi.

“I don’t meet cam site members in person, I just like to connect on here.” (Said nicely with an encouraging smile)

 

[yummybrownfox]

I simply tell them "I don't meet up in person." LOL. Some people don't like how honest and straightforward I am about it, but oh well. *shrugs* Do you want to A) hear the truth, or do you want me to B) bullshit you and give you false hope...and then you run here to ACF to whine that I scammed you?

I had a member I got attached to and did want to meet, but he went all "This isn't right...I'm ashamed...I'm supposed to be a Christian!" on me. Lol. Now I'm just wondering wtf he ended up doing with those worn panties he bought from me...lmao.

I recently posted a tweet where I was half kidding about wanting to move to Florida one day, because I'm sick of Maryland's bipolar-ass weather (I hope that phrase doesn't offend anyone...this is just how my sis and I describe the weather out here). One of my Twitter followers (I have no idea who this guy is on what site, but he seems nice enough and 'likes' all of my tweets) took it a bit too seriously, and was talking about how he's looking forward to my move to Florida. Lol. Um...what? Even IF I move to Florida in the future after my son graduates high school, why exactly are YOU looking forward to it? We're not gonna meet up over lunch.

 

[corsican1]

Overheard what I consider a classic outside of GCT .... " I wouldn't fuck him if his sperm cured death." What ? Too cute?

 

[Pure_emotion]

"I dont date people, sorry. " " I never go out so...NO" "why complicate such a beautiful thing as camming ?" " I'm antisocial" and if they become really idiotic i just ban the lifetime. From my looooong experience on cam, members who ask this are usually cheapest weirdos you dont want in your room anyway.

 

[CharlotteLace]

Every time someone asks my location (presumably to meet up) I tell them a different location. It’s especially funny if someone asks the same question right after and gets a different answer.

 

[EmptyKins]

My location has always been "Blanketsburg". It's fun when they get the reference!

 

[Larkin Love]

and other things clients don't want to hear!

Main one on my mind atm is "I don't meet clients". I'd love cutesier ways to say that for starters (I can be *very* firm by default but I'd like to be very firm and cute!)

I don't think you should bother to say it in a cute way. I say be direct with your clients. You don't have to explain yourself or make up a story why you don't. The less miscommunication between model and client the better.

 

[SaffronBurke]

Every time someone asks my location (presumably to meet up) I tell them a different location. It’s especially funny if someone asks the same question right after and gets a different answer.

That's even better than the dudes who mis-hear my reply of Pluto and think I said Toronto. No, man, look at me, clearly I'm outta this world!

 

[SNATCH]

I tried being cute in the beginning, but I just got harassed more & more bc I wasn’t “giving them a definate answer” I just say I don’t meet ANYONE from the Internet. But, I’m usually a bitch about it, cause I hate being asked.

 

[RinnRainbo]

If it's on mfc it's against the rules and they are monitoring pms (I got a warning for joking about marriage for tokens. The member did too) so that's an easy out.

Didn't know MFC monitors PMs... I can say that as an excuse so people stop asking.

 

[Zoe_Amadora]

Didn't know MFC monitors PMs... I can say that as an excuse so people stop asking.

It makes me a lot easier for sure. Every so often you still get "but other models do it." My eyes are gonna roll outta my head one of these days