Models not LETTING you take them for a private

[Ozzie_]

I must have missed the fine print when I signed up for the public discussion forums here at ACF that said I was obligating myself to visiting and tipping a selection of model members of the forum on their chosen platforms in return for engaging in sparkling repartee with them here .

 

[CheeseMoon]

[...] that said I was obligating myself to visiting and tipping a selection of model members of the forum on their chosen platforms in return for engaging in sparkling repartee with them here .

Cam site users always have a guilt trip somewhere to indulge.
Choose one cam site user subcategory from this handy list:

a) Credit card carrying life support system for a penis
b) Simp
c) Untapped market

Back to lurk mode again I guess, to avoid any surcharges on the mere existence of my dangling appendages.

 

[Brit]

I must have missed the fine print when I signed up for the public discussion forums here at ACF that said I was obligating myself to visiting and tipping a selection of model members of the forum on their chosen platforms in return for engaging in sparkling repartee with them here .

There is no obligation to do that and no one, including myself, is saying that there is. My entire point is that if you don't want to monetarily support models on here who are giving their resources to you, then that's on you and if you're cool with yourself for that choice, then by all means, you do you. But! Don't be disrespectful by voicing that. Keep it to yourself. Not supporting isn't what's disrespectful (though I personally find it a bit questionable and I feel that everyone should, at the very least, tip Amber for creating this space). It's the voicing it aloud which is disrespectful. Does that make sense?

Let's say you are a huge music lover. You love listening to it, you love figuring out how the musicians put together their pieces, you just love everything about music. You find a forum full of musicians and other people who love music as much as you. You integrate yourself into said forum, asking questions, chatting with others, sharing stories of different bands you've seen and heard, etc. The musicians take their time to give thorough and helpful advice to questions you ask, no matter how complicated or time consuming. They read your posts and give comments. You laugh together, sometimes cry together. Would you tell these musicians that you have no interest in supporting their music?

Back to lurk mode again I guess, to avoid any surcharges on the mere existence of my dangling appendages.

Please read the above since you also seem to be misinterpreting my point.

 

[ArcticKitty]

I must have missed the fine print when I signed up for the public discussion forums here at ACF that said I was obligating myself to visiting and tipping a selection of model members of the forum on their chosen platforms in return for engaging in sparkling repartee with them here .

*sigh* She isn't saying that Oz. She misread an earlier post of mine way differently from what I intended. If it's all the same, I'd rather not escalate this.

 

[MarieElise]

engaging in sparkling repartee with them here .

That sounds fucking fancy. I'm stealing that phrase for use in my live streams

"What would you like this evening; perhaps to engage in sparkling repartee, or are you perhaps the more get straight to jerking your motherfucking man meat, as fast as you can, type?" Hahahahahaha. I know I'd get at least one laugh out of that one.

 

[misterical]

jerking your motherfucking man meat, as fast as you can, type?" Hahahahahaha.

It's possibly one of the main design flaws of the camming experience that masturbating and typing aren't easy to do simultaneously.

 

[NotYou]

It's possibly one of the main design flaws of the camming experience that masturbating and typing aren't easy to do simultaneously.

Haha, this is funny because, I did a show with a model and she loves the whole talking and teasing, and we were doing that but she was rubbing with one hand and typing.. eventually she was too horny and was struggling to type so easily and fast, so she said "now let's take our hands away from the keyboard and just masturbate"... Afterwards we laughed about it because I said "you see, now you know it's not so easy for us guys to talk with only one hand" lol.

 

[misterical]

Haha, this is funny because, I did a show with a model and she loves the whole talking and teasing, and we were doing that but she was rubbing with one hand and typing.. eventually she was too horny and was struggling to type so easily and fast, so she said "now let's take our hands away from the keyboard and just masturbate"... Afterwards we laughed about it because I said "you see, now you know it's not so easy for us guys to talk with only one hand" lol.

You're only one horny typo away from asking her to "flick her abs".

 

[MarieElise]

It's possibly one of the main design flaws of the camming experience that masturbating and typing aren't easy to do simultaneously.

Yeah talk to text needs to be integrated.

That's why I like one on ones w C2C and volume. 90 percent of the exclusives I do on SM are c2c w volume

 

[yummybrownfox]

^I just wanted to say that @ArcticKitty did tip me on MyFreeCams about a month ago. I just looked at my token history, and it was a 200-token tip...as well as two more tips of 20 tokens each. In fact, she's the only person who tipped me at all that night. I'm a model who gets, in my opinion, unfairly overlooked too often due to my unfortunate low camscore and low room counts. It's not like the good 'ole days when I actually had a 4,000+ camscore, and was clearing room topic goals. Lol. So yeah...when a low camscore model like me gets the rare 3-digit tip, it's especially a big deal. So many members will have lots of tokens visible, yet they'll just sit there in my free chat (or in that damn PM Viewer) and not tip or even say hi. And it sucks. Some even have the audacity to whine that they can't PM me. I've had many nights where I've considered just giving up, and then I'm like Nah, don't do that...this is still your favorite cam site. Lol. ArcticKitty, however, kept me company with good conversation and tipped, and I appreciated it.

 

[Ozzie_]

That sounds fucking fancy. I'm stealing that phrase for use in my live streams

"What would you like this evening; perhaps to engage in sparkling repartee, or are you perhaps the more get straight to jerking your motherfucking man meat, as fast as you can, type?" Hahahahahaha. I know I'd get at least one laugh out of that one.

I also admit that often my repartee here is not sparkling and is most likely dull as dishwater

 

[MarieElise]

I also admit that often my repartee here is not sparkling and is most likely dull as dishwater

I don't think that, I think you're a little sweetie, or big as the case may be. I know some Aussie guys are like fucking giants... you know what I mean.

 

[Ozzie_]

I don't think that, I think you're a little sweetie, or big as the case may be. I know some Aussie guys are like fucking giants... you know what I mean.

If we are talking circumference, then yes.
(And unfortunately I mean my waist! )

 

[Omne35]

Please read the above since you also seem to be misinterpreting my point.

Let me see if I can simplify this.
There have been several members recently that have stated that they wouldn't visit model members of ACF because they would feel uncomfortable interacting in a cam environment after interacting on this forum. I too have noticed that.

You feel that although it's their choice they shouldn't make it a binary choice. They could easily visit and tip a bit but not participate in sexual activities. You also feel that publically stating it is disrespectful. Your example is spending time on a musician forum for extended periods and then publically stating that you would never buy tickets to any of their concerts. I am also guessing that by stating that it makes it seem that you are good enough to associate with on here but for some reason not in your cam role and that bothers you. Not unreasonable with the frequent double standards that you run into. It's emotional and pretty resistant to logic.

Or I could just be completely wrong and posted nonsense. Always hard to tell on forums.

 

[Originalrobski]

I used to regularly visit a certain model on MFC, who has since retired from the business. There was something about her that just drove me crazy. Amazingly pretty and her eyes just melted me. At first, she would do pretty much anything in private, but the more we got chatting (always on platform but normally just in side chat away from main room) the more she admitted it got harder for her to do some of the stuff she would normally. The last few years it just ended up as chat as i didnt want to make her feel uncomfortable, and tbh we had a great laugh anyways. She was finding the job more and more difficult so i wasnt surprised when she gave me the heads up she was leaving.

So yeah, i can understand if a model said that. Id just find another lady to view and move on

 

[LolaLuv]

I've seen this happen with strippers. They get into a conversation with someone and then get up and leave the table without offering a dance or private room because they said it would have been too awkward. I kind of get it, there are so many people who call us blood sucking vampires, gold diggers, whores who only care about money, blah, blah, blah. If you let that kind of talk get into your head then it can make you feel like you don't want that person to think you only talked to them for the money, or you don't want to "cheapen" the experience by making it sexual. Some entertainers are more sensitive to this than others.

As for me, kind of...? When I started camming I told of few of the guys from the strip club I had worked at where to find me. This one guy, he would come in a couple times a week and buy lap dances and we would chat for a song or two in between dances. I considered him kind of a friend. A client friend. We emailed each other and I gave him my personal Twitter. My first night on cam he came into my room and bought flash pussy, threw some compliments, and left. After work I had a DM that that was him and for some reason I felt really violated. I know it's not rational because I chose to put that on my menu and I would have been happy doing it for any stranger, but this guy had never seen that or asked to see that in the club, he was always a perfect gentleman and it gave me the creeps for some reason so I blocked him on all my socials and email.

Sometimes the choices we make are purely emotional and can't really be explained. It's just a feeling we have and we go with it. We are not AI after all so we are not purely logical in our actions.

 

[EasternPromis]

Reading this thread I found it so surprising that some guys do not like when model asks their name where they from! I literally always ask this, because in my many years of camming members always asked me this, it’s like they can’t play with their cocks unless they know my “real” name, where I’m from, my age and marital status lol
So it led me to conclusion that they enjoy sharing this info too! Because if you want to know something about other person you just met, you’d be willing to share same thing in return?

 

[ArcticKitty]

I've seen this happen with strippers. They get into a conversation with someone and then get up and leave the table without offering a dance or private room because they said it would have been too awkward. I kind of get it, there are so many people who call us blood sucking vampires, gold diggers, whores who only care about money, blah, blah, blah. If you let that kind of talk get into your head then it can make you feel like you don't want that person to think you only talked to them for the money, or you don't want to "cheapen" the experience by making it sexual. Some entertainers are more sensitive to this than others.

As for me, kind of...? When I started camming I told of few of the guys from the strip club I had worked at where to find me. This one guy, he would come in a couple times a week and buy lap dances and we would chat for a song or two in between dances. I considered him kind of a friend. A client friend. We emailed each other and I gave him my personal Twitter. My first night on cam he came into my room and bought flash pussy, threw some compliments, and left. After work I had a DM that that was him and for some reason I felt really violated. I know it's not rational because I chose to put that on my menu and I would have been happy doing it for any stranger, but this guy had never seen that or asked to see that in the club, he was always a perfect gentleman and it gave me the creeps for some reason so I blocked him on all my socials and email.

Sometimes the choices we make are purely emotional and can't really be explained. It's just a feeling we have and we go with it. We are not AI after all so we are not purely logical in our actions.

That is entirely understandable! If you're led to a certain set of expectations it *is* jarring and off putting to have someone change it on you like that.

As far as the "gold digger/whore" stereotype goes, I can imagine how that can sting but I also figure that anyone who holds it is cheap cheap cheap And an asshole if they try to lay that on anyone. Do they say that about someone waiting on tables or pouring drinks? I wonder. Let them get their income from customer tips/fees and say they don't get sharp eyes on time and money.

 

[inertvolcano]

Reading this thread I found it so surprising that some guys do not like when model asks their name where they from! I literally always ask this, because in my many years of camming members always asked me this, it’s like they can’t play with their cocks unless they know my “real” name, where I’m from, my age and marital status lol
So it led me to conclusion that they enjoy sharing this info too! Because if you want to know something about other person you just met, you’d be willing to share same thing in return?

Haha I can see a lot of guys doing this. From my perspective I never ask for these things because I don't want the model to think I'm a stalker weirdo, and I don't like answering them because I like having my privacy online. However if I've gotten comfortable with a model and we have a rapport I don't mind sharing it. It's just not something I want to share in my first PM conversation. We have to build up to it.

 

[ArcticKitty]

^I just wanted to say that @ArcticKitty did tip me on MyFreeCams about a month ago. I just looked at my token history, and it was a 200-token tip...as well as two more tips of 20 tokens each. In fact, she's the only person who tipped me at all that night. I'm a model who gets, in my opinion, unfairly overlooked too often due to my unfortunate low camscore and low room counts. It's not like the good 'ole days when I actually had a 4,000+ camscore, and was clearing room topic goals. Lol. So yeah...when a low camscore model like me gets the rare 3-digit tip, it's especially a big deal. So many members will have lots of tokens visible, yet they'll just sit there in my free chat (or in that damn PM Viewer) and not tip or even say hi. And it sucks. Some even have the audacity to whine that they can't PM me. I've had many nights where I've considered just giving up, and then I'm like Nah, don't do that...this is still your favorite cam site. Lol. ArcticKitty, however, kept me company with good conversation and tipped, and I appreciated it.

((((( Fox!! ))))

OMG, I remember that night well, especially my gaffe about it being so quiet *wince*. FWIW, it was a late Monday night EST and I'm sure I was referring to MFC as a whole being unusually quiet, even for Monday. Even Stan Whisky Dick was nowhere to be seen!

Thank you so much for posting, I do appreciate it. You didn't really have to, but it's all good. tt's a nice example of what I mean when I say that when I see someone I know from ACF is online, I'm just visiting a friend from ACF not for entertainment services or special attention.

 

[EasternPromis]

Haha I can see a lot of guys doing this. From my perspective I never ask for these things because I don't want the model to think I'm a stalker weirdo, and I don't like answering them because I like having my privacy online. However if I've gotten comfortable with a model and we have a rapport I don't mind sharing it. It's just not something I want to share in my first PM conversation. We have to build up to it.

You’re rather exception!
In my experience members always ask this questions and even get offended if I show disinterest in them and not asking in return lol maybe I just attract extra sociable crowd
I usually ask for name (first name) just to be nice/express interest in knowing them and how they like me to address them + on Onlyfans where many people “u1234567” I can actually tell who is who and rename them. Where they from gives me an understanding of what time there now (is it morning wood? Or he’s relaxing in the evening?) and this way I know from which country audience I have, what their activity like - mornings or evenings etc.

 

[misterical]

I had a bit of a weird experience yesterday which is in a similar vein to this discussion. I have a model who I visit regularly and we've become quite friendly (as some of you will know from the thread I posted about it). Yesterday we were chatting and someone took her private. Horny me decided to join the pvt about a minute in and she was visibly thrown off her stride by my appearance. I felt bad. I'd gone in with the best intentions. I was horny but I figured I would also add money to the pot. We discussed it later and it was clear that while she wasn't angry about it, she was definitely uncomfortable. She tried to pass it off as her hangup and told me that I shouldn't be worried but I felt that I'd over-stepped the mark. We have quite a close friendship (as far as one can in this environment) and we've had quite explicit sexual discussions before and have had a private show in the past. Maybe just me barging in while she's trying to meet the needs of another customer. I don't know. It was definitely awkward.

 

[yummybrownfox]

I had a bit of a weird experience yesterday which is in a similar vein to this discussion. I have a model who I visit regularly and we've become quite friendly (as some of you will know from the thread I posted about it). Yesterday we were chatting and someone took her private. Horny me decided to join the pvt about a minute in and she was visibly thrown off her stride by my appearance. I felt bad. I'd gone in with the best intentions. I was horny but I figured I would also add money to the pot. We discussed it later and it was clear that while she wasn't angry about it, she was definitely uncomfortable. She tried to pass it off as her hangup and told me that I shouldn't be worried but I felt that I'd over-stepped the mark. We have quite a close friendship (as far as one can in this environment) and we've had quite explicit sexual discussions before and have had a private show in the past. Maybe just me barging in while she's trying to meet the needs of another customer. I don't know. It was definitely awkward.

I don't think you overstepped, because you didn't know it'd make her uncomfortable. In the future she should try to see if the member is willing to take her to "true private" or "exclusive" instead...where there is no spying (If the site has that option). When I used to have a regular on MFC who'd take me private often, he used to do true privates with me so it could be one-on-one. And those are the kind of privates I preferred anyway.

 

[CheeseMoon]

So it led me to conclusion that they enjoy sharing this info too!

Kinda. Everyone's knee jerk reaction to the question "What's your name?" is to answer truthfully and everybody loves talking in length about themselves, but what's troubling for cam models in terms of giving away personal information is potentially equally troubling for cam site users. Generally speaking, none of us knows what (type of) person is asking the question and why, nor what rabbit hole we're being led down into when we start giving out real info.

Not all cam models are as upstanding, decent and professional as those who frequent ACF, unfortunately ...

(Sorry for veering a bit off topic here)

 

[InannahQoH]

Reading this thread I found it so surprising that some guys do not like when model asks their name where they from! I literally always ask this, because in my many years of camming members always asked me this, it’s like they can’t play with their cocks unless they know my “real” name, where I’m from, my age and marital status lol
So it led me to conclusion that they enjoy sharing this info too! Because if you want to know something about other person you just met, you’d be willing to share same thing in return?

Depends..
We use the fake alias / broadcast name.
And a fake real name / real location / real age as well.

So when it goes down to basics, of whats your name, age, where do you live.
Id doubt many provide real info anyway.

 

[EasternPromis]

Kinda. Everyone's knee jerk reaction to the question "What's your name?" is to answer truthfully and everybody loves talking in length about themselves, but what's troubling for cam models in terms of giving away personal information is potentially equally troubling for cam site users. Generally speaking, none of us knows what (type of) person is asking the question and why, nor what rabbit hole we're being led down into when we start giving out real info.

Not all cam models are as upstanding, decent and professional as those who frequent ACF, unfortunately ...

(Sorry for veering a bit off topic here)

I say this with a bit of sarcasm “So it led me to conclusion that they enjoy sharing this info too” as on practice I know that it’s not always the case… My whale tipper of many years at some point demanded to know every single detail of my life, demanded to have access to my IRL Instagram and even wanted to know my address every time I moved to send me gifts. Yet I was to found you he didn’t give me his real name, not even first name! Lol he gave out his real name by accident. But imagine - so many demands and not wanting to do the same?
I find it ridiculous what members demand to know sometimes. So they must offer same in return or cut off their nosiness.
We can both lie while exchanging pleasantries.
I just say whatever they want to hear my supposedly first name and even some my old time regulars convinced they know my last name (they never did and I also married and changed last name at some point).
Same with members - they really don’t have to give out all of the info if not comfortable, however I think if someone says ”I’m John from Tennessee and I’m engineer” it gives me 0 “special” info really, especially being not from USA.
More important is to not post or share pictures that give too much information. One person sent me dick pic where it’s visible hanging his company ID with his full name and face photo. I warned him to not send this!
Oh and do not post pictures of your kids in Snapchat which you’re using for cam girls, this is just weird and gross but happens so often lol

 

[noiett]

So this is a bit of an odd one that I still don't quite understand, but it has happened to me multiple times with different models.
I have mentioned in the past with one model who said it would be too weird/awkward, but it has happened at least 4 or 5 or 6 times total.

The most recent model, I have been visiting a while, and when I first met her I took her for a private - no cam2cam, nothing bad or too much, it was striptease with topless. Amazing private, nothing too much, and it's what she does.
I don't think I had tokens for a week or 2 but we still talked and laughed etc. When I eventually went to ask "hey would you like to go for a private again, the last one was fantastic", she said no.. I asked why and she gave a brief "it would be awkward now we have spoken and laughed lots and we get on so well".

Today I finally asked her what "exactly" is the reason as I am really confused and unsure, we get on great, we genuinely do. She isn't doing it so I am all "oh bb I love you please" and start tipping her lots to convince her to let me take her.
Finally today she said I am "like a younger brother or another relative, so it would be too weird".


As I first mentioned, this has happened more than once or twice, so I just don't get it. This model specifically does understand that I truly respect her decision but I did say I still don't "actually get it" - even though I do understand what she means, it's just that it's a camsite, you know..

Most models I have a great laugh and chat with and then we do any kind of private, it usually ENHANCES the experience for the better, we get on great and have a lot of fun.

But with a handful, it's the opposite. The above example is just the most recent one. But I am always confused and annoyed by it - as I want to take them private. None of them has ever tried to do some manipulative way to get me to tip more though, so I think they are genuine about it being weird for them..


I am curious:
Users: have you had any similar situations?
Models: have you also done this to users that you feel like you get on well with and talk with "a lot" (a lot can be defined as whatever you think). I would assume maybe no? Because it's a loss of income, even if it is only a small % (meaning I am no huge whale).

This has happened to me a number of times and I even discussed it with a couple of models. For many of them performing for an anonymous user feels easier and safer. The moment you get friendly and you become someone whose opinion matters, some start finding it less comfortable to perform shows for you or just cannot do it anymore.

It’s true also that in some cases depending on the model, the conversations you have and the relationship you stablish it may be the other way around. Knowing and liking each other may spice things up and she may feel even more into performing for you.

I believe all this to be just normal. This is a pretty special job and the way you feel on cam is very important. It ever frustrates you that a model is reluctant to accept your pvt consider that she probably sees you as a good friend and that whatever you think of her matters to her. That's probably more important than a little private time but if you don't like it the only alternative is not to befriend her in the first place.

 

[misterical]

I understand some guys need trust building, in my experience they pop in hang around, say a few words, pop out. They may ask a question after a while and eventually feel safe enough to go into private which is lovely. I find that different to chatting about say a common interest, I do have regulars who do chat about common interests but they've usually spent before we discover this and the interest is different rather than exactly the same. Also they aren't pushy or prying.

I can be a bit weird like this. I like to get to know a model first. I'll visit a fair few times before I'll bite. Every time I visit I end up having to come up with an excuse for not going private at that point because it's easier than explaining my weird need to get to know a model first

And then I'll visit that one time too many without going private and end up looking like a stalky teenager with a crush who has lost the ability to speak

I'll then follow that up with something even worse - I'll drop into the room next time and go pvt without even saying hello first.

I am an idiot.....

 

[Deleted member 64633]

The only reason I wouldn't let someone take me pvt is because they were rude and offensive or complained about my prices. Or try take me in the middle of a very busy stream!

I love going pvt with all my regs and especially one of them who's been with me from day 1 and its never been awks even though we chat about very random stuff and a lot of private things otherwise.
I can kind of get how it could be awkward maybe for the member but then they won't go pvt anyway.
For me, it's better when I know the person 1) no discussion before pvt so we get straight to business 2) we know exactly what we like and dislike and those pvts are literally what I live for ❤ 3) amazing convo after

 

[Steve__]

So this is a bit of an odd one that I still don't quite understand, but it has happened to me multiple times with different models.
I have mentioned in the past with one model who said it would be too weird/awkward, but it has happened at least 4 or 5 or 6 times total.

The most recent model, I have been visiting a while, and when I first met her I took her for a private - no cam2cam, nothing bad or too much, it was striptease with topless. Amazing private, nothing too much, and it's what she does.
I don't think I had tokens for a week or 2 but we still talked and laughed etc. When I eventually went to ask "hey would you like to go for a private again, the last one was fantastic", she said no.. I asked why and she gave a brief "it would be awkward now we have spoken and laughed lots and we get on so well".

Today I finally asked her what "exactly" is the reason as I am really confused and unsure, we get on great, we genuinely do. She isn't doing it so I am all "oh bb I love you please" and start tipping her lots to convince her to let me take her.
Finally today she said I am "like a younger brother or another relative, so it would be too weird".


As I first mentioned, this has happened more than once or twice, so I just don't get it. This model specifically does understand that I truly respect her decision but I did say I still don't "actually get it" - even though I do understand what she means, it's just that it's a camsite, you know..

Most models I have a great laugh and chat with and then we do any kind of private, it usually ENHANCES the experience for the better, we get on great and have a lot of fun.

But with a handful, it's the opposite. The above example is just the most recent one. But I am always confused and annoyed by it - as I want to take them private. None of them has ever tried to do some manipulative way to get me to tip more though, so I think they are genuine about it being weird for them..


I am curious:
Users: have you had any similar situations?
Models: have you also done this to users that you feel like you get on well with and talk with "a lot" (a lot can be defined as whatever you think). I would assume maybe no? Because it's a loss of income, even if it is only a small % (meaning I am no huge whale).

Yes. Absolutely. I'm more passive about wiggling out of it though, and rarely tell them directly why (or the real reason).

Watch Secret Diary of a Call Girl (It's available tons of places online to stream for free) Season 1; Episode 1.
All will likely become clear.
Pay special attention to the dude who can't get off, and gets her ego going, and then what happens...

You shared a few years ago that you are some fancy long word, which is like a group of people who can't get sexually off with total strangers. I forgot the word. Something sexual but it wasn't sapiosexual it was a different word. Some people don't want you to know the real them in this context, and if you get too close (or try to) you're booted.

Such a useful insight, thank you

MarieElise​