Was I played. .. :(

[dallyboy13]

I am sure I was but I wanted the opinion of some of the girls in here. You all seem very honest...

So I am a chatty mfc user who tips for conversation. There is very little sexual content that is online that I get aroused by. One model recently gave the impression that we had a lot in common, and as a new model asked me to help "coach her " to increase her income, and we became (what I thought) was pretty good friends.

After a couole months, and a dramatic increase in her tip flow she has stopped communication off site.

I feel like a sucker after spending hours helping with every aspect of her profession (twitter, profile, tracking vids of her shared on other sites, ect). Is this something that most girls do? Am I just an over helpful person and should of expected it?

Please don't take me as needy_ I just really enjoy helping people, and having dated an exotic dancer in thwvpast, know the game, I also know they have lives outside of work, and are normal people.

Rant/question over... lol.

 

[DeezNA]

I know I have a dick and all but I have been on both sides of this situation so I might be able to help.

It's very helpful to have open, clear lines of communication. I'm a firm believer that communication and honesty are the building blocks of all successful, healthy interpersonal relationships.

When life gets busy (and when camming picks up, it absolutely does) and other life factors come into play, distance is a common result. If you reach out to her candidly and try to initiate a dialogue specifically about making time for you as a friend, it may help. When you work in an industry in which you have to cater to many customers on a personal level on AND off cam, it can be very difficult to give fair and equal time to everyone.

If she is not responding or doesn't have the time that you feel you need or deserve, I would try to move on. You deserve better than to be ignored, it's disrespectful and only hurts you.

A few things to keep in mind:
- What kind of friendship you are looking for. If you were simply there to help her with her business and she is fully established, she may not need your assistance in that regard anymore.

- She doesn't owe you anything. Your services were voluntary and admirable. It hurts when people do what can be perceived as "taking your help and then shutting you out" but it happens. You were a good friend for assisting and the sense of knowing you helped someone in need should be plenty compensation in itself.

- Even if she can't make time off-cam for you, you can still hang out with "the gang" in her room. It's better than nothing but if it makes you uncomfortable then I would move on.


I'm sorry you are in this situation, it's not a fun one. You're a good guy for helping her out. As a model, it is a service that is DEEPLY appreciated whether explicitly expressed or not.

Best of luck, dallyboy

 

[dallyboy13]

I didn't ever expect anything. I'm not looking for an online girlfriend. It's just a slap when it goes from then referring to you as "bff" and texting all day to ignored. Sadly I know when her profits take a shit kicking then my phone will explode with" I miss you's" and such.

 

[dallyboy13]

I didn't ever expect anything. I'm not looking for an online girlfriend. It's just a slap when it goes from referring to you as "bff" and texting all day to ignored. Sadly I know when her profits take a shit kicking then my phone will explode with" I miss you's" and such.

 

[DeezNA]

As much as it may feel like a kick in the teeth, life is cyclical. It is ever evolving. Humans have remained the dominant species on this planet due to our inherent adaptability, thus our constant morphing physically, mentally and interactively is ingrained in our genetic code.

We take our experiences, we learn what we can from them, teach ourselves and others and continue forth.

If your friendship has degraded to less than "bff" level (which is too often used as a misnomer and a term of endearment) and it is serving neither of you any benefit, it seems detrimental to force it. If her returning to you would hurt more than it would help, it would be worth calmly explaining that. You never know.

Life is full of experiences like this, it's how they are handled that can make all the difference in how soothing or violent the change is.

 

[Sevrin]

You weren't necessarily "played". There could be any number of reasons she's cooling things off.

Maybe she has a new SO and is focusing her energy on that person (It happens! :shock: ).
Maybe she thought you were getting too serious.
Maybe you inadvertently said something that touched a sore point.
Maybe it was one of a hundred other possible reasons.

In any case, get over it. You'll live longer.

 

[JessieWolfe]

So when I started out on Mfc I was super excited to make friends and talk to people off cam through texting and so on. No matter how much I enjoy the company of people I meet through camming, it always took a toll on me emotionally. With all of these close friendships I formed, I was being pulled in so many directions and it stressed me out even though I genuinely cared for the members. I had to let people know that since I am such an introvert, I just need time to myself. With the social part of camming 6 hours a day, added on top of hanging out with my loved ones the rest of the day, all while constantly texting my regulars, I was Drained

She may not have played you, but just realized how much of an emotional toll bringing camming into her personal life could be.

 

[BritneySiren]

I would talk directly to her and hopefully she will be direct and honest with you. I guess I'd ask myself is it also worth it to spend this energy worried about whether this was real. Also if she is anything like myself (introverted) and prone to frequent sickness and a bit moody those can also be factors. Though getting busy can also make one not spend as much time with other activities. I also struggle with depression myself so there are days where I don't want to get out of bed or do much (though having this job it's hard to have a complete off work day even while sick (currently)

I've had a recent long time in person friend pull away being too busy too. I guess the most important thing to remember is...even with all that if someone cares they will make time for you and if a problem is brought up they'll clear up the misunderstanding. If not they'll get defensive, self deprecating, attacking... No one is worth that. I had to let that person go cause I can't spend energy on someone who doesn't have time for me because they're too busy to see me when they live a mile away... with excuses like I only go out twice a month or comparing you to other ppl.

So bring it up see how it goes... though mostly likely the actions all ready tell you where you stand. I'd move on cut my losses. Everything in time fades... the next time it'll be easier.

 

[CrazyCatLady]

So when I started out on Mfc I was super excited to make friends and talk to people off cam through texting and so on. No matter how much I enjoy the company of people I meet through camming, it always took a toll on me emotionally. With all of these close friendships I formed, I was being pulled in so many directions and it stressed me out even though I genuinely cared for the members. I had to let people know that since I am such an introvert, I just need time to myself. With the social part of camming 6 hours a day, added on top of hanging out with my loved ones the rest of the day, all while constantly texting my regulars, I was Drained

She may not have played you, but just realized how much of an emotional toll bringing camming into her personal life could be.

This is/was me....exactly. I think a lot of models are actually very introverted. Its actually one of the many reasons I enjoy camming. I like human interaction...I just dont necessarily like it in person. I feel it is exhausting to always have to be "on"....for people to have expectations on how often I should "hang out" with them. And I feel awkward in conversations and "trapped".The great thing about this interaction is at ANY TIME if I am uncomfortable I can shut down the computer and walk away.

I also had a guy claim he wanted to just be a nice guy and help me (as long as I gave him access to every video I ever made) well he helped me one time. Very basic on my profile. He helped me make a link and add some extra stuff I still have the same basic profile I have always had. This man has never tipped me. And he demanded SO MUCH attention. So I asked him "Hey are we going to work on my profile further" and every time I said something of the sort he logged out.

So yeah. I basically dont talk to him anymore....and to be honest even if he had done everything he said he would I think it would be kind of unfair to expect so much attention...especially with a new model who now is getting tipped well according to you. She is likely busting her ass and is exhausted. She also probably now has to interact with a lot of people who have paid for her KIK/SNAP/Email whatever so she probably does not have the time.

Im sure she appreciates your help...I know I would. But to be honest as a new model myself I am exhausted...and my being introverted and not talking to many people doesnt mean I dont care about them or appreciate them. It just means I need time to myself to decompress.....

 

[dallyboy13]

I know it's a little late. Just wanted to thank you all for the replies.

 

[ThePrincessLuxy]

This happens to models as well. Now you know how we feel when members drop us out of the blue.

I don't want to say you were played necessarily, but that's just the nature of online relationships. She has more tippers now, so she probably has to divide her offline attention between all of you now, which means less time for you. members find new/other models they like after time goes by, and once again he/she divides his attention between models, meaning less time for the model.