Reality check

[MarkJanus]

As much as I agree you should assume and be proud of who you are and what you do, it is interesting to notice that many camgirls stressing this particular point in this thread are usually accompanying it with remarks like :

"Anyway, I made the decision that if anyone finds me it'll be a in or out situation. Either they respect me and are in my life or they're out.
You either live in fear or own it. Ima own it."

or

"Yep, camming caused the crack that spread in my last relationship and I'm so glad that I ended it! I had no idea about all the shitty awful opinions he had about sex work before then. And the nasty things he said to me when I told him. He was also the most vanilla person ever. My regulars even nicknamed him Mr. Vanilla! My partner now fits me so much better than Mr. Vanilla. Good riddance."

No offense but if you are pride and right in your boots about your job and wants people to respect you... why lying to them in the first place ? Why not just be honest and see what happens...

Even before talking about camming in itself, if my GF hides me that she's doing anything that would occupy such an important place in her life, I'm not sure what it would means concerning the respect and trust she has for me.

And of courese, it's camming where you are sharing your intimacy and are selling and having sexual interactions (even though virtual) with many other people.

Everybody's different. Some guys could date a sex worker, some couldn't. It doesn't mean they direspect the job, that's how they envision a relationship and it's not necessarily "sex depravition" as you can also read earlier.

A lot of camigrls can't either which is why they quit when they have a BF or couldn't date a camboy...

Calling sex deprived people who are not as sexual or outgoing than they are is just doing the exact same thing they are reproaching people to do with them : caricature and ostracisation. People have different relation to sex. Some even have none and are perfectly fine with it and zen. Ahoummm !

I'm sure n important part of what have people moving away (or at least not coming back) from sex workers when they learn is precisely that : they learned, they feel betrayed. You lied to me, didn't trust me. that's the worst feeling in life.

When you're cheated on, it's not so much the fact your BF or GF fucked some other dude/chica, it's he betrayed your trust and lied to you.

Reverse the situation. You're not in the sex industry and learn by someone else
your BF had been lying to you about his life and is a gogo dancer/escort guy having fun with hundreds of girls and old women in hotel rooms for money... and you see pics of him on the net....

Yes, if someone doesn't accept who you are, there's no reason to have anything to do with him. But at least, give them a chance.

And guess what, when you're honest and seem happy an proud of what you do, chances people around you will accept it and see it as "normal" what they don't really know, will be that much bigger.... And if they don't, who cares ?

If you try to hide it and doesn't seem proud or respect it, don't expect people who have a preconceived opinion about it to accept it either as they will feel there's something wrong since you don't seem to respect it yourself and didn't want to tell them.

It all start with you. Not a big fan of these "inspirational quotes" but : "your vibe attracts your tribe" or something like that.

Did I really write all this ?

 

[Olive]

I don't know how quoting works, but my response is first about the post above ^

I think it's easy to say (especially if you've not lived it) to embrace it and openly share/show it, and that that is the 'right' way & 'honest'.

Just like everyone has a right to share what they want of their body with whoever online & offline, they also have a right to share information or withhold information about themselves and what they do or don't do. And the act of sharing or withholding information in itself doesn't make someone responsible for whatever other people feel (hurt/betrayed or fine) about that specific decision.

Beside that there's also a difference between lying, and withholding information. Some people are private, and some people are open. Not telling something is not equal to not being proud about what you are doing. And there's different moral feelings about lying too. Some people are totally fine with telling lies, others only tell lies they consider 'little white lies', some are morally opposed and (try) to never tell one..

I think with everything in life, there's not a 1 size fits all. If you do or do not share your camming with someone else is a completely personal decision. And only you as a person can decide what is right for you.

Thoughts about the rest of the topic
I think it is important for those who cam to realize that they are going to be recorded by bots and put up on random sites. Because that is just the reality of the situation. So many are not aware of this and will get spooked when they realize. (It's also not specific to camming itself but for every piece of information you put out on the Internet in general.)

So, I know I will be on the Internet. HOWEVER I despise cappers, and illegal uploaders of content. Stealing is immoral. Putting people in literal danger by going past geoblocking is immoral. Does that make me stop? No. But it does influence what I put out there and how much I do in public chat.
I don't know if I can say that I 'accept' that my content and the content of every camgirl is illegally put on random websites. But the reality is that it happens, and that's a reality I have chosen to deal with.

 

[MarkJanus]

I think we agree and we don't...

Of course, everyone has the right to deal about his privacy as he wishes. There's no questioning that. I personally think you should assume whatever you do in life, cos no matter what, lying is a dead end street as it inevitably comes and bites you at some point... And you're isolating yourself precisely not to have to lie.

But that's everyone's choice. And I understand some situation are more delicate than others and people are differently psychologically armed.

But we're not talking about calling CNN or having a gangbang vid on Pornhub's homepage. We're talking about the guy you're living with, here.

I mean, not telling your BF you're a camgirl... Ask any guy how he would feel about it...

And my point was precisely concerning people saying they're assuming and proud of what they do... I don't give a fuck about people think... but still not telling close people...

 

[AmberCutie]

I think we agree and we don't...

Of course, everyone has the right to deal about his privacy as he wishes. There's no questioning that. I personally think you should assume whatever you do in life, cos no matter what, lying is a dead end street as it inevitably comes and bites you at some point... And you're isolating yourself precisely not to have to lie.

But that's everyone's choice. And I understand some situation are more delicate than others and people are differently psychologically armed.

But we're not talking about calling CNN or having a gangbang vid on Pornhub's homepage. We're talking about the guy you're living with, here.

I mean, not telling your BF you're a camgirl... Ask any guy how he would feel about it...

And my point was precisely concerning people saying they're assuming and proud of what they do... I don't give a fuck about people think... but still not telling close people...

Who are you replying to?

 

[Mila_]

Even before talking about camming in itself, if my GF hides me that she's doing anything that would occupy such an important place in her life, I'm not sure what it would means concerning the respect and trust she has for me

Surprisingly instead of asking yourself why your girlfriend doesn't trust you enough to tell you the truth, you blame the girl for lying. Trust is a two way street and if someone feels the need to hide an important part of their life from you is because they don't trust you will be open and accepting, they know, perhaps from intuition or from actual practical experience that you will be judgemental, critical, hurtful and possibly will end the relationship as you know it. So if telling the truth is guaranteed doom then lying and gambling time away starts to sound like the better option.

 

[MarkJanus]

Surprisingly instead of asking yourself why your girlfriend doesn't trust you enough to tell you the truth, you blame the girl for lying. Trust is a two way street and if someone feels the need to hide an important part of their life from you is because they don't trust you will be open and accepting, they know, perhaps from intuition or from actual practical experience that you will be judgemental, critical, hurtful and possibly will end the relationship as you know it. So if telling the truth is guaranteed doom then lying and gambling time away starts to sound like the better option.

So, let me be sure I understand :

"if someone feels the need to hide an important part of their life from you is because they don't trust you will be open and accepting, they know, perhaps from intuition or from actual practical experience that you will be judgemental, critical, hurtful and possibly will end the relationship as you know it

"then lying and gambling time away starts to sound like the better option"

What freaking kind of "relationship" are you describing here ? And what the fuck would you do with this dude to begin with exactly ?

You're quietly explaining us that not to end up a relationship with that detestable individual that for some reason you would have found something appealing in, "lying starts to sound the better option.

It almost feels like you're trapped or you have no choice but staying with this guy.

And that's precisely the point that I'm not "surprised" myself now you're missing.
I (and most people) can't honestly see how you can envision or simply call this a relationship. Most people can't imagine how you can live with a guy and not tell him you're a camgirl.

I wouldn't have "to ask myself why my GF wouldn't trust me" because I'd never be that kind of guy and I could never find myself in a that kind of strange relationship you're describing.

I can't even imagine how it is technically, day to day possible to hide you're a camgirl. Your body language, your behaviour, your attitude, it must fuck up everything starting by yourself, conscioulsy or not.

I don't even understand how from a personal self-esteem point of view one can live in such a situtation. At some point it's not about being honest with others but with yourself. The first people we're lying to in life is ourselves.

Are you even taking and sharing with that BF about your life, your experiences or is it just give me the salt and don't forget to put the put the toilet set down. I really don't see what kind of relationship we're talking about here...

I'm lying to you because I don't trust you. Then what the fuck are you doing with me ?

If I was a psy, I'd say you're trying to reverse roles... by ironically putting the blame on others for blaming you while it's not even about blame because there's nothing to blame for.

It's not about camming, it's about the relationship you have with the guy.

Would you have asked me if I could date a camgirl a few years ago. I would have told you I have nothing about the job but I couldn't... Now I know I could but if the girl was honest with me from the start... or at least when it feels like something is happening between us.

And I know the way I (as everyone else) am building my relationships with people, there are no fucking way I could be in a situation where I wouldn't know my GF is a camgirl.

 

[THE MOLLIE MARIE]

No offense but if you are pride and right in your boots about your job and wants people to respect you... why lying to them in the first place ? Why not just be honest and see what happens...

Because it can literally be a danger to our safety to be open about what we do. That's my personal reason. Why not see if some madman decides to fuck with me over my choice of profession? Well, why would I?

Edit: Oh, I see your posts are about people in relationships not disclosing their work to their partner. I can't speak on that. But uh yeah, safety first.

 

[Osyrus]

Because it can literally be a danger to our safety to be open about what we do. That's my personal reason. Why not see if some madman decides to fuck with me over my choice of profession? Well, why would I?

Edit: Oh, I see your posts are about people in relationships not disclosing their work to their partner. I can't speak on that. But uh yeah, safety first.

Interesting discussion here. I am genuinely un-opinionated on this topic because i'm new-ish to cam culture, and a thought crossed my mind. How is hiding a drug problem or an affair for example, different than hiding the cam life?
I understand the fundamental/physical differences, so I feel i'm playing the "devils advocate" loosely speaking. It feels like a grey area in my mind and some clarity would be much appreciated

 

[THE MOLLIE MARIE]

Interesting discussion here. I am genuinely un-opinionated on this topic because i'm new-ish to cam culture, and a thought crossed my mind. How is hiding a drug problem or an affair for example, different than hiding the cam life?
I understand the fundamental/physical differences, so I feel i'm playing the "devils advocate" loosely speaking. It feels like a grey area in my mind and some clarity would be much appreciated

Not sure if you meant to respond to me specifically, but as my edit clears up, I didn't realize the post I replied to was talking about nondisclosure within a relationship setting until I had already responded to the part I quoted. I would never want to be in a relationship with someone who I wouldn't feel comfortable talking to about my career choice. Can't speak for those who might.

 

[Deleted member 37064]

Not sure if you meant to respond to me specifically, but as my edit clears up, I didn't realize the post I replied to was talking about nondisclosure within a relationship setting until I had already responded to the part I quoted. I would never want to be in a relationship with someone who I wouldn't feel comfortable talking to about my career choice. Can't speak for those who might.

I would say this holds true of any career, or life in general. If you're not comfortable talking with someone you're involved with, it's best to end it. Communication is such an important part of a relationship, yet so many fail at it.

 

[Olive]

So, let me be sure I understand :

etc etc

I highly doubt that there's a huge group of cammers who hide it from their significant other.
And if they do, then that is their decision and we have absolutely no right to judge them for it.

It forever remains someone's personal decision. Ask yourself this: who are You to have any personal opinion about it? What makes You equipped and knowledgeable enough about their personal situation & things they go through to make an informed decision about whether or not they should or shouldn't tell them (and the world)?

If I had a SO, they would definitely know what I'm doing. But I've also had a SO in the past who knew certain things about me, and is now blackmailing me and threatening my physical and emotional wellbeing (all because of breaking up with him). Nobody knows the exact lengths some people will go through in certain situations. The best we can do if we tell someone is hope and pray that they are decent human beings, but they can always turn around and be the opposite (and no, you can not always know beforehand).

I honestly, can not understand how anyone can judge anyone for trying to stay safe. If you haven't walked in someone else's shoes, think again before you judge.

And also.. the way I see it, Mila is only responding to a hypothetical situation that You brought into life and trying to rationalize why that hypothetical situation could be in existence to begin with. You're the one who is assuming there are girls who lie about it to their SO, she's not saying they are. So there's absolutely no need for the outrage, especially since it's all hypothetical anyway.

I would say this holds true of any career, or life in general. If you're not comfortable talking with someone you're involved with, it's best to end it. Communication is such an important part of a relationship, yet so many fail at it.

Ofcourse, anyone would agree that if you're not comfortable enough to discuss things with someone you're in a relationship with that you shouldn't be in a relationship with them at all. But things are hardly ever that black & white. There's so many situations where you just can not easily 'get out' of a relationship or where someone turns out to be completely different than they appeared in the beginning... Again, easy to judge and assume things.

The world is a lot darker and more complicated for many and I don't want those people to come on here & feel like they are wrong for doing what is best for them. Personal safety/wellbeing is the most important thing of all.

 

[Deleted member 37064]

I highly doubt that there's a huge group of cammers who hide it from their significant other.
And if they do, then that is their decision and we have absolutely no right to judge them for it.

It forever remains someone's personal decision. Ask yourself this: who are You to have any personal opinion about it? What makes You equipped and knowledgeable enough about their personal situation & things they go through to make an informed decision about whether or not they should or shouldn't tell them (and the world)?

If I had a SO, they would definitely know what I'm doing. But I've also had a SO in the past who knew certain things about me, and is now blackmailing me and threatening my physical and emotional wellbeing (all because of breaking up with him). Nobody knows the exact lengths some people will go through in certain situations. The best we can do if we tell someone is hope and pray that they are decent human beings, but they can always turn around and be the opposite (and no, you can not always know beforehand).

I honestly, can not understand how anyone can judge anyone for trying to stay safe. If you haven't walked in someone else's shoes, think again before you judge.

And also.. the way I see it, Mila is only responding to a hypothetical situation that You brought into life and trying to rationalize why that hypothetical situation could be in existence to begin with. You're the one who is assuming there are girls who lie about it to their SO, she's not saying they are. So there's absolutely no need for the outrage, especially since it's all hypothetical anyway.

First off, I'm sorry to hear you're having to deal with a PoS ex who's doing shit to you. This is wrong of someone to do it, and even more so when it's someone who was very close.

Ofcourse, anyone would agree that if you're not comfortable enough to discuss things with someone you're in a relationship with that you shouldn't be in a relationship with them at all. But things are hardly ever that black & white. There's so many situations where you just can not easily 'get out' of a relationship or where someone turns out to be completely different than they appeared in the beginning... Again, easy to judge and assume things.

The world is a lot darker and more complicated for many and I don't want those people to come on here & feel like they are wrong for doing what is best for them. Personal safety/wellbeing is the most important thing of all.

You've read too far into my sentence. I stated nothing in regards to things being easy and simple, nor even complex, when needing to end a relationship. I just stated it's best to end it. How/when/where/why someone decides to terminate the relationship is on them.

 

[Olive]

You've read too far into my sentence. I stated nothing in regards to things being easy and simple, nor even complex, when needing to end a relationship. I just stated it's best to end it. How/when/where/why someone decides to terminate the relationship is on them.

Yes you are right. I'm sorry if I seemed to imply that you did say/mean those things.
I didn't exactly read that in your message, but I did feel it necessary to add onto it.

(I'm also aware that I'm most likely more sensitive about the topic considering my own experiences )

 

[Deleted member 37064]

Yes you are right. I'm sorry if I seemed to imply that you did say/mean those things.
I didn't exactly read that in your message, but I did feel it necessary to add onto it.

(I'm also aware that I'm most likely more sensitive about the topic considering my own experiences )

No worries on your response. I got the feeling you were carrying over from the other post you responded to. Our past experiences help shape us into who we become.

Hopefully things will get taken care of, and you won't have to deal with his BS anymore.

 

[Erik166mn]

I have a question and need advice. My wife and I started doing live camera stuff (only 2 times so far) not to make money but because we like people watching us. I've read a ton of these posts and every is saying pretty much the same thing, once it's out there it's out there.

We do not want anyone to ever find out who we are and identify us. We just bought some masks on Amazon and we were going to wear those to prevent us from being identified. We don't allow recordings but I guess they could do it anyways. We use chaturbate.

I'm looking for recommendation on keeping our identify hidden. Should we just never show our faces? Ski masks? If a video got out, I don't really see the harm since we could not be recongized. In fact if the video only showed very close ups and it got out I wouldn't really mind since I would actually get off on that knowing people can get off by watching my wife get fucked.

If you were in my shoes what would you do? Keep caming or stop because it's too risky? We have VERY good high paying jobs.

 

[EspiKvlt]

I have a question and need advice. My wife and I started doing live camera stuff (only 2 times so far) not to make money but because we like people watching us. I've read a ton of these posts and every is saying pretty much the same thing, once it's out there it's out there.

We do not want anyone to ever find out who we are and identify us. We just bought some masks on Amazon and we were going to wear those to prevent us from being identified. We don't allow recordings but I guess they could do it anyways. We use chaturbate.

I'm looking for recommendation on keeping our identify hidden. Should we just never show our faces? Ski masks? If a video got out, I don't really see the harm since we could not be recongized. In fact if the video only showed very close ups and it got out I wouldn't really mind since I would actually get off on that knowing people can get off by watching my wife get fucked.

If you were in my shoes what would you do? Keep caming or stop because it's too risky? We have VERY good high paying jobs.

It sounds like you've already started without hiding your faces, yes?

Every single Chaturbate and MFC recording is on a site somewhere.

I'm gonna tell you what I tell everyone: If your vanilla job is worth more to you than your sex work, and if losing your vanilla job is super important to you, then this industry isn't for you.

And I'm fairly certain masks aren't allowed on Chaturbate but I could be wrong.

What I'll also tell you is those recordings are so saturated, it's very unlikely someone who knows you would see them unless they were out hunting for them. But yes, they're already out there, that I can tell you with 100% certainty.

I hate to be such a bummer but I'm just being real with you. I have been outed at EVERY. SINGLE. JOB. Luckily I haven't actually been fired from one for doing sex work yet but it is the reality of the situation.

 

[Vera]

Adult work carries stigma with it. You can either minimize your risk through methods outlined earlier in this thread (Bawksy's info is excellent), accept eventual exposure over a long enough timeline and the social ramifications that may follow, or abstain from sexwork.

I started SW in 2012 and remember being scared as shit reading through this thread. The reality is, it's incredibly easy to be doxxed if you aren't savvy. I *know* what it is like to be afraid.

No one is forcing anyone's hand, here. Either make an informed decision or don't, but handwringing makes you extremely vulnerable to PREDATORY people who get off on newbie insecurity.

Another pro-tip for ladies: don't take male input seriously, and if you do entertain their ideas, charge them for it. They are consumers. They are NOT experts.

Stop arguing with men. Holy shit, unless they work in the industry, they are speculating. Get your verification and move on.

 

[Aprilsweetart]

I'm like secretly hoping one day I'll go for a job I am WAY under qualified for and then the boss will be browsing porn hub and there my mum titties will be in all their glory and just like that I'll get hired.

 

[passmeawhiskay]

Models. You need to realize this right now. ANY time you put something on the internet, it is there FOREVER. It can never be eliminated, and eventually it will be found by someone who you'd rather not find it.

For example, any time you are on cam, you should assume that images or videos of that cam show will be recorded and put on the internet forever. I'm talking private shows, group shows, and ESPECIALLY public shows. It's already the case that MFC owns the rights to all of said imagery and video, and can do with it what they like.

You may not like it when members record your shows and upload them to different places on the internet, and you can try hard to get those images taken down. Sometimes you may find that you are even successful with getting an instance of something taken down. But the truth is, once it's out there it is impossible to fully retract. All it takes is one person to have saved a copy of it before it got taken down, and it can be reposted again. There is jack shit you can do about it, so it is not worth your time trying to take it down. It will only delay the inevitable, and could in fact speed it up by pissing people off and making them post it more.

A lot of models use location-block in order to block people from their hometown and surrounding area from seeing them. This is a decent short-term solution, but in the end, it's pointless. There is absolutely no way to guarantee that people from your home town will never find out. All it takes is one time for someone you know from real life to be travelling out of state and see you online, or see your pictures. It is also easy for technically-savvy people to use a proxy to get around location blocks. The point is, location block is only a temporary solution, and there are ways around it. You will be found out. It is only a matter of time.


Let's say you're super lucky, and during your several-year stint as a camwhore, you are never found by someone you know in real life. You think you're off the hook? Along with all the imagery MFC has recorded of you and could sell at any point in time, you can bet that random members (and guests!) have taken lots of imagery too. It will be on the internet forever. 40 years down the road, your kids will stumble across naked pictures and videos of you on the internet. It's going to happen. This is reality, and there is nothing you can do to change it.

The point? If you don't want your friends and family to find out you're a camwhore, then don't become a camwhore. Don't want your grandkids to see videos of you anally fisting yourself? Then don't become a camwhore. Don't want the local authorities to find out you're a camwhore? I think I'm becoming redundant here.

Do you think your real-life identity is secret? All it takes is ONE person you know from real life to find you on MFC and leak your identity. It's going to happen eventually. Hopefully it won't happen for a while, but you need to be prepared for the day when it does happen, because mark my words, it will.

Once something is on the internet, it is there forever. Making an attempt to change that fact only makes you look stupid.

Wow, Im diggin up a dead horse thread here but, wow, well said and interesting. Luckily I dont plan on having kids so... phew lol

 

[melanieoncam]

I have a question and need advice. My wife and I started doing live camera stuff (only 2 times so far) not to make money but because we like people watching us. I've read a ton of these posts and every is saying pretty much the same thing, once it's out there it's out there.

We do not want anyone to ever find out who we are and identify us. We just bought some masks on Amazon and we were going to wear those to prevent us from being identified. We don't allow recordings but I guess they could do it anyways. We use chaturbate.

I'm looking for recommendation on keeping our identify hidden. Should we just never show our faces? Ski masks? If a video got out, I don't really see the harm since we could not be recongized. In fact if the video only showed very close ups and it got out I wouldn't really mind since I would actually get off on that knowing people can get off by watching my wife get fucked.

If you were in my shoes what would you do? Keep caming or stop because it's too risky? We have VERY good high paying jobs.

Yes, as someone else said your recordings are already out there now. Since you don't need the money,doesn't seem worth the risk. How would you feel if you lost those high paying jobs tomorrow?

Masks won't really prevent you being outed.
You can still be recognized by your voice, things in the background of your video, etc. You'd be surprised how many people would know you just by your vocal characteristics.

Edited to add - oops didn't realize this was a couple months old post.

 

[Siena]

This is a topic I struggled with for several months when I first started on cam. I’m just now to the point of confidence.

My health pushed me out of a profession that I’d been in for almost 2 decades. I chose to start camming so I can control my schedule and pace myself. I was used to working in the public eye so at first I worried about someone I knew ‘bumping’ into me. But the more I thought about it I realized that obviously THEY are seeking what I’m currently providing or they wouldn’t have found me anyway.

My husband is extremely supportive and thankfully super tech savvy. My children are grown but currently unaware but I am fairly certain wouldn’t be shocked if they found out. My family hasn’t been close to me for years so zero loyalty lost in their corner.

I don’t regret the profession I’ve chosen so I intend to own my choices 100%. If anyone in my life has a problem with it they can seek counseling elsewhere. I’m a grown well-educated adult who is running a business and if someone doesn’t like what I do....... Don’t watch and scroll on by any footage they see because there is a huge variety of us.

 

[Busymantm]

When I first started I was fine with showing my face and everything in public shows. Then I had a couple of scary encounters with stalkers (leaving messages on my mom's phone guessing it was me, knocking on my door). I worked it out without involving the police, but at that point I decided to pull back and just do neck down and be very careful about my privacy.

A few friends and family know, but I'll say it is very hard to predict how somebody will react. I lost a friend because they were not comfortable with it, which shocked me as they were fairly open minded. If you go into this work, you should prepare ahead of time how you'll talk about it with friends and family if one of them finds out. The more clear headed and confident you are, the more likely they'll come around. If you're super emotional or defensive or trying to think on the fly, it won't go well.

 

[concernedcitizen]

This is hypothetical, not an advertisement as I have not created it yet. If I made an AI system (think Watson for cam girls) that automatically requested removal of copyrighted content for models, would people pay for that? Or is the general sentiment that it's a waste of time to even try?

 

[EspiKvlt]

This is hypothetical, not an advertisement as I have not created it yet. If I made an AI system (think Watson for cam girls) that automatically requested removal of copyrighted content for models, would people pay for that? Or is the general sentiment that it's a waste of time to even try?

How would an AI know what's stolen and what I posted myself?

I would never trust an AI to do that correctly.

 

[BadgirlIvy]

Models. You need to realize this right now. ANY time you put something on the internet, it is there FOREVER. It can never be eliminated, and eventually it will be found by someone who you'd rather not find it.

For example, any time you are on cam, you should assume that images or videos of that cam show will be recorded and put on the internet forever. I'm talking private shows, group shows, and ESPECIALLY public shows. It's already the case that MFC owns the rights to all of said imagery and video, and can do with it what they like.

You may not like it when members record your shows and upload them to different places on the internet, and you can try hard to get those images taken down. Sometimes you may find that you are even successful with getting an instance of something taken down. But the truth is, once it's out there it is impossible to fully retract. All it takes is one person to have saved a copy of it before it got taken down, and it can be reposted again. There is jack shit you can do about it, so it is not worth your time trying to take it down. It will only delay the inevitable, and could in fact speed it up by pissing people off and making them post it more.

A lot of models use location-block in order to block people from their hometown and surrounding area from seeing them. This is a decent short-term solution, but in the end, it's pointless. There is absolutely no way to guarantee that people from your home town will never find out. All it takes is one time for someone you know from real life to be travelling out of state and see you online, or see your pictures. It is also easy for technically-savvy people to use a proxy to get around location blocks. The point is, location block is only a temporary solution, and there are ways around it. You will be found out. It is only a matter of time.

Let's say you're super lucky, and during your several-year stint as a camwhore, you are never found by someone you know in real life. You think you're off the hook? Along with all the imagery MFC has recorded of you and could sell at any point in time, you can bet that random members (and guests!) have taken lots of imagery too. It will be on the internet forever. 40 years down the road, your kids will stumble across naked pictures and videos of you on the internet. It's going to happen. This is reality, and there is nothing you can do to change it.

The point? If you don't want your friends and family to find out you're a camwhore, then don't become a camwhore. Don't want your grandkids to see videos of you anally fisting yourself? Then don't become a camwhore. Don't want the local authorities to find out you're a camwhore? I think I'm becoming redundant here.

Do you think your real-life identity is secret? All it takes is ONE person you know from real life to find you on MFC and leak your identity. It's going to happen eventually. Hopefully it won't happen for a while, but you need to be prepared for the day when it does happen, because mark my words, it will.

Once something is on the internet, it is there forever. Making an attempt to change that fact only makes you look stupid.

I love this! This is all completely true. I actually showed this to my hubby so he would understand a bit more and see where I'm coming from. He get's mad when I'm open about it to our friends and family. I'm like....my family knows I'm a freak, IDC if everyone sees me spread wide squirting all over myself lmao.
The kids thing, well mine are very young now, just gonna have to come up with a speech for when they do find me online! They are all boys so I have no doubt they one day will. Hell, I hope to still be in the industry by the time they're old enough to start searching the web.

 

[Deleted member 43650]

Surprisingly instead of asking yourself why your girlfriend doesn't trust you enough to tell you the truth, you blame the girl for lying. Trust is a two way street and if someone feels the need to hide an important part of their life from you is because they don't trust you will be open and accepting, they know, perhaps from intuition or from actual practical experience that you will be judgemental, critical, hurtful and possibly will end the relationship as you know it. So if telling the truth is guaranteed doom then lying and gambling time away starts to sound like the better option.

To add another perspective for the OP of this topic:

I don't exactly recall many cam-girls saying they've been lying to their s/o about camming. Typically, the issue is that the boyfriend KNOWS about it, said he was cool with it, maybe even encouraged/got excited about it, and then turned around and shamed the cam-girl for it. Preetttyyy sure this happens more often than some cam-girl str8 up lying to their s/o.

And yeah, it's probably tough to date a totally vanilla guy when you're sex positive and work in adult media. I can relate: I can't imagine my wife not being my wife: open-minded, sex positive, etc. That's not me being an asshole - that's me wanting to connect with another human being on a more visceral and intimate level.

 

[NaomiNyx]

I don't exactly recall many cam-girls saying they've been lying to their s/o about camming. Typically, the issue is that the boyfriend KNOWS about it, said he was cool with it, maybe even encouraged/got excited about it, and then turned around and shamed the cam-girl for it. Preetttyyy sure this happens more often than some cam-girl str8 up lying to their s/o.

I would agree with you that most people don't start caming and hide it from their s/o. I cant imagine not being honest about it. My partner has been incredibly supportive, and I wouldn't have let go of the shame I felt previously and tried caming without his support. I can't imagine hiding something like that. HOWEVER, if I were seeing someone new and had already been established at caming, I don't know if that is something I could bring up right away. I'm very open and honest about what I do. There are certain people I would rather not know, but if they find out it will be water off my back. I imagine I would withhold that information from a new partner until I gain their trust and move into more serious terms with them. I think it would be fair for them to be upset if the information was withheld or lied about for a long time, but you have to give people a chance to get to know you before you can expect them to reveal private and vulnerable information.

 

[BadPrincessP]

I know the risks. I choose to take the risks. I may be upset when the risks turn out the wrong way anyway. After all... you know the risks when you have a surgery. Does that mean you won't be upset if the surgery goes wrong?

Yeah, I know, different things. But not really.

I completely agree. If people I know find it they find it. I'm making decisions about my life that please ME. If people care about you they should want you to be happy. If this is something you are happy doing, who cares if people find out. I get to work from home being creative and embrace my sexuality and have unlimited earning potential. Sounds like a great life if you ask me. Haters gonna hate..


Follow me on Twitter: https://twitter.com/ScorpioJules1

MFC: https://share.myfreecams.com/ScorpioJules

 

[Deleted member 37064]

I would agree with you that most people don't start caming and hide it from their s/o. I cant imagine not being honest about it. My partner has been incredibly supportive, and I wouldn't have let go of the shame I felt previously and tried caming without his support. I can't imagine hiding something like that. HOWEVER, if I were seeing someone new and had already been established at caming, I don't know if that is something I could bring up right away. I'm very open and honest about what I do. There are certain people I would rather not know, but if they find out it will be water off my back. I imagine I would withhold that information from a new partner until I gain their trust and move into more serious terms with them. I think it would be fair for them to be upset if the information was withheld or lied about for a long time, but you have to give people a chance to get to know you before you can expect them to reveal private and vulnerable information.

This. So much this. Not just from a sex worker's view. But, in general. Anytime you're in a new relationship, you slowly open up to them about things as feel more comfortable with them and begin to trust them more.

I'm not a model, nor in the adult industry. But, there's many things I keep to myself from others until I feel like I can trust them with it. So, I can only take a guess at what models go through in terms of can someone be trusted with knowledge of what they do as they begin to date someone. From some of the conversations I've had with different models, I think this is why many feel they can't be in relationships with someone so long as they cam.

 

[Mfcalana]

Jeez that post gave me anxiety for a second there.