Question on reading a situation correctly.
I was(?) close with a cam girl, texting, phone, the big three words, etc. She told me early that she did not feel comfortable showing herself to me on the site, so we never fooled around. However, I am pretty sure I was too exhuberant, and she pulled back a lot. 2 week stretches without even being in her room. We started talking again on the site, but that was pretty much it. And no, from the conversations, we clearly weren't viewing each other as just friends. I was hoping to get back into her heart, but figured it was unlikely.
So I know she has a model friend there, and I have talked with her friend before. Never fooled around, just quick (2 min) privates to joke etc. But this time, the friend and I started teasing each other, and went private to keep teasing. no clothes came off, but very... interesting things were said, including that this girl thought a threesome with her friend and me would be fun. I had thought the same thing and said so. (yes it would never happen). But, I called a halt because I thought anything further ... just did not feel right.
So her friend (who told me later she liked to complicate things, for fun I guess) texted the other model toldher everything, and she was pissed, asking if I was testing her, and though she did not care who I took private, but why chose her best friend? Did I do it intentionally? Good questions, and I said it was unintentional, just two people escalating the flirting, and that I stopped it. I said not a test. She asked me why I did it, and I said, (not very brightly) well, I was horny and the teasing was fun. Thankfully I did not say her friend was incredibly hot then too, which she was. I also said that she was the one woman I wanted more than any other of the site and she was also one I could not have. Not sure where that came from, but out it did come. She told me I should leave her room. So I did.
I am a little pissed myself, too. If she does not want a personal relationship with me, then I should be able to chose whoever. If she does still have feelings, then how long am I supposed to wait for her to pull me out of the cold to be close again? And of course, I worry I hurt her, and think that if I did have a chance, then I fucked it up, so that makes my stomache and throat tighten up with some sadness.
A lot of me just wants to walk way from the whole thing and say if is FUBAR and there's nothing for it. The other part of me cares for this woman, and I know cam life is hard enough without drama, so I want to do whatever I can to fix it, and texted her saying so.
So, have I fucked up beyond all recognition? Did I kill whatever chance I had? I think so. Would not be surprised if I never heard back. I certainly will not go in her room without an invite directly. But was she out of line too? If she cut me loose, how why blow up at me? Makes me want to take a lot, and I mean a LOT, of drinks out of very small glasses.
I was(?) close with a cam girl, texting, phone, the big three words, etc. She told me early that she did not feel comfortable showing herself to me on the site, so we never fooled around. However, I am pretty sure I was too exhuberant, and she pulled back a lot. 2 week stretches without even being in her room. We started talking again on the site, but that was pretty much it. And no, from the conversations, we clearly weren't viewing each other as just friends. I was hoping to get back into her heart, but figured it was unlikely.
So I know she has a model friend there, and I have talked with her friend before. Never fooled around, just quick (2 min) privates to joke etc. But this time, the friend and I started teasing each other, and went private to keep teasing. no clothes came off, but very... interesting things were said, including that this girl thought a threesome with her friend and me would be fun. I had thought the same thing and said so. (yes it would never happen). But, I called a halt because I thought anything further ... just did not feel right.
So her friend (who told me later she liked to complicate things, for fun I guess) texted the other model toldher everything, and she was pissed, asking if I was testing her, and though she did not care who I took private, but why chose her best friend? Did I do it intentionally? Good questions, and I said it was unintentional, just two people escalating the flirting, and that I stopped it. I said not a test. She asked me why I did it, and I said, (not very brightly) well, I was horny and the teasing was fun. Thankfully I did not say her friend was incredibly hot then too, which she was. I also said that she was the one woman I wanted more than any other of the site and she was also one I could not have. Not sure where that came from, but out it did come. She told me I should leave her room. So I did.
I am a little pissed myself, too. If she does not want a personal relationship with me, then I should be able to chose whoever. If she does still have feelings, then how long am I supposed to wait for her to pull me out of the cold to be close again? And of course, I worry I hurt her, and think that if I did have a chance, then I fucked it up, so that makes my stomache and throat tighten up with some sadness.
A lot of me just wants to walk way from the whole thing and say if is FUBAR and there's nothing for it. The other part of me cares for this woman, and I know cam life is hard enough without drama, so I want to do whatever I can to fix it, and texted her saying so.
So, have I fucked up beyond all recognition? Did I kill whatever chance I had? I think so. Would not be surprised if I never heard back. I certainly will not go in her room without an invite directly. But was she out of line too? If she cut me loose, how why blow up at me? Makes me want to take a lot, and I mean a LOT, of drinks out of very small glasses.
