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Post saying/phrases that make no sense!

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Kunra9

Kunra9

Dec 15, 2012
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Obviously these things aren't meant to be taken literal, but when you DO take them literal they make no sense!

I slept like a baby!

Ummmm babies wake up constantly throughout the night. Every 2 - 4 hours screaming their heads off.

That sounds like awful sleep.

Aaaaaaaaaand go!
 
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On the other hand...

(it's not like you're actually balancing what's being said in each hand...)

Eats like a bird.

(describes someone who doesn't eat much. Yet birds eat twice their body weight in food each day.)
 
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"Pull yourself up by your own bootstraps."

Meaning to accomplish things on your own, without outside help. Even a swami can't levitate that way. :)
 
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This has always bothered the living shit out of me....

"You cant have your cake and eat it too"

DAFUQ. THATS WHAT YOU DO WITH CAKE. THATS WHAT ITS THERE FOR. YOU FUCKING EAT IT.

Argh

(Now that I think of it, "bothered the living shit out of me" could go in this thread too... :woops: )

Oh yea, and when people say "I could care less". Dont you mean to say you could NOT care less? Der...
 
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SadieSixx said:
This has always bothered the living shit out of me....

"You cant have your cake and eat it too"

DAFUQ. THATS WHAT YOU DO WITH CAKE. THATS WHAT ITS THERE FOR. YOU FUCKING EAT IT.

Argh

(Now that I think of it, "bothered the living shit out of me" could go in this thread too... :woops: )

Oh yea, and when people say "I could care less". Dont you mean to say you could NOT care less? Der...
Click to expand...
But if you eat your cake you don't have it anymore.

Totally agree with could instead of couldn't care less, that irks me.
 
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Ever notice how people generally start an offensive sentence with the phrase "No offense, but..."

Like that makes whatever fucked up shit you're about to say ok.

No offense, but I just find you to be the most vile scumbaggerish piece of human shit on the planet and would love nothing more than to watch you be tortured for 20 days straight prior to death by rusty spoon... no offense.
 
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"Dark side of the moon" Great album, inaccurate term.

"She's built like a brick shit house" I have never understood this term or how it could be used as a positive way to describe a woman.

"Her legs all the way up (or something like that" Where would they stop otherwise?

"Same difference" Usually used only when something is pointed out as being different and in no way similar.

I remember it was sort of a thing to say that something was "redundant" because the kids learned a new word that week, which really they didn't because they were using it in place of "stupid," thereby proving themselves to be stupid- and redundant, since the world is full of stupid people.

I feel cynical.
 
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lordmagellan said:
"Dark side of the moon" Great album, inaccurate term.

"She's built like a brick shit house" I have never understood this term or how it could be used as a positive way to describe a woman.

"Her legs all the way up (or something like that" Where would they stop otherwise?

"Same difference" Usually used only when something is pointed out as being different and in no way similar.

I remember it was sort of a thing to say that something was "redundant" because the kids learned a new word that week, which really they didn't because they were using it in place of "stupid," thereby proving themselves to be stupid- and redundant, since the world is full of stupid people.

I feel cynical.
Click to expand...
Ha! The "brick shithouse" one is incomplete...originally, it was "she's built like a brick shithouse--stacked." Because "stacked" was an old slang term referring to the size of a woman's breasts. Eventually, guys dropped the "stacked" and the phrase became even less meaningful.
 
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SadieSixx said:
This has always bothered the living shit out of me....

"You cant have your cake and eat it too"

DAFUQ. THATS WHAT YOU DO WITH CAKE. THATS WHAT ITS THERE FOR. YOU FUCKING EAT IT.

Argh

(Now that I think of it, "bothered the living shit out of me" could go in this thread too... :woops: )

Oh yea, and when people say "I could care less". Dont you mean to say you could NOT care less? Der...
Click to expand...

Yes (about the cake)! This is one of the top phrases I can't stand! What the hell are you supposed to do with cake then? LOL.

And same with "I could care less." People say that all the time, and it makes absolutely no sense. I just scratch my head like Um, dude, you're not saying it right.....
 
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Nordling said:
lordmagellan said:
"Dark side of the moon" Great album, inaccurate term.

"She's built like a brick shit house" I have never understood this term or how it could be used as a positive way to describe a woman.

"Her legs all the way up (or something like that" Where would they stop otherwise?

"Same difference" Usually used only when something is pointed out as being different and in no way similar.

I remember it was sort of a thing to say that something was "redundant" because the kids learned a new word that week, which really they didn't because they were using it in place of "stupid," thereby proving themselves to be stupid- and redundant, since the world is full of stupid people.

I feel cynical.
Click to expand...
Ha! The "brick shithouse" one is incomplete...originally, it was "she's built like a brick shithouse--stacked." Because "stacked" was an old slang term referring to the size of a woman's breasts. Eventually, guys dropped the "stacked" and the phrase became even less meaningful.
Click to expand...
I'd never heard "stacked" attached to it. Interesting.
 
When the shit hits the fan

I understand it's supposed to be a visual thing. If shit were to hit a fan it would go everywhere.

But who the hell would throw shit at a fan to begin with?? Someone who has an obsession with cleaning up unusual messes??
 
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One that actually does make sense, but took me a few years to work out, was one my much older bro used to tell me from the time I was old enough to first say, "I want" He would tell me to want in one hand, and shit in the other, and see which one fills up first. Getting that may have been my earliest epiphany, and now one of my favorite things to tell little brats running around wanting shit. :eek: :lol:
 
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One I tend to use too much is, BTW, well "by the way" I think should be used when linking two related thoughts, not like I often catch myself using it, to segway from any given thing to any other random thought.
 
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emptiedglass said:
Break a leg.
Cuz, you know, being in a cast and on crutches is such a wonderful thing.
Click to expand...

I can answer this one! Putting on my theatre nerd glasses here... :geek:

Back in the day theatre stages were tilted slightly so that the back of the stage was higher than the front of the stage. If you were looking at it from the side it would look like this: \ This was so the audience could see the action in the back better from the floor view. It's also why the back of the stage is called "upstage" and why the front is "downstage". Anywho, the idea behind Break a Leg is that you'll have such a good show that you'll get a standing ovation and have to come to the downstage so many times that you'll slip off and break your leg. Still kind of fucked up and unpleasant, but it makes a bit more sense in that context. </nerding out>
 
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