Models and their significant others (or exes)

[UncleThursday]

:confusion-scratchheadyellow: Ok, so maybe another little rant here...

But the other night a model I had secretly been perving for over a year and who I recently started hanging with and I were talking. I've been wanting to take her private for a while, and she knows it. So I joked around about still waiting for her to be ready for a private...

And she replied that she can't do privates right now, because her ex doesn't like it when she does privates.

This kind of knocked me to the floor.

Now, I assume any models with significant others don't hide the fact they are cam models rom them. I assume it wasn't a point on a first date... like Hi, I'm X, and I;m a cam model... but I;m sure any husbands/boyfriends/girlfriends know what the models on here do. And, yes, I'm sure not every one of them likes it.

But here's my thought on the matter... if the model's significant other has that much of a problem with it, then the couple should already have been talking about it. If they can't agree with it, then one of two things will obviously happen, either the model will give it up, or they will eventually break up over it.

But, to say that you {b}can't{/b} do privates because your {b}{i}EX{/b}{/i} doesn't like it? Well, he/she is an ex. As in no longer with you. Whatever the reasons for the breakup aren't my concern, but at the same time, the ex's preferences are now interfering with the entertainment I want and potential income for the model. And they aren't even going out with the model anymore...

It's bad enough when bfs/gfs/wives/husbands are controlling when they are part of a couple, but when they're somehow still controlling when not in that situation? There's a bigger issue there.

I know another model who had a similar issue... well, kind of, I haven't spoken to her in a while, don't know if her and her bf at the time are still together and don't even know if she still works on MFC, or any other cam site. But her BF, who I also knew, got extremely jealous when she took privates. And it hurt her income.

I didn't want to sound rude, so I didn't say what I was thinking... which was "So? Who the fuck cares what your EX doesn't like? He's your EX!"

So, I guess... am I wrong for thinking this? Should significant or ex significant others' opinions on what they prefer a model do have that much weight, especially if it just cost the model at least 1275 tokens (just from me, no telling how many other privates she turned down)?

I was discussing this with another model I know, and her husband, at their place, last year. And I mentioned that privates and groups are all just fantasy. The model tries to help fulfill the member's fantasy of having a woman he/she finds attractive at least pretend to find the member attractive for a short time. Both the model and her husband agreed. I had taken the model private before, but we both knew it was just a fantasy. Her husband knew it was just a fantasy. And here we were, sitting around drinking and toking on their deck while discussing it. (This actual conversation was brought about by the fact we all knew the other model with the jealous bf, and the model was angry because she and her husband on their premium account got banned because the BF didn't like them tipping her...)

But, in my own opinion, it shouldn't matter what an ex likes or doesn't like. I mean, when I dated a stripper, it didn't bother me she was stripping. Hell, that's where I met her. And when we broke up, it didn't bother me she was still stripping.

Maybe I'm odd. :confusion-scratchheadblue:

 

[Rileyster]

I do agree that exes shouldn't have any say in what a model can or can't do, but we don't know the whole situation. Maybe she's trying to get back with him? No idea. Sucks though!

 

[Shaun__]

I didn't want to sound rude, so I didn't say what I was thinking... which was "So? Who the fuck cares what your EX doesn't like? He's your EX!"

She cares what her EX thinks, and she may have a good reason like child custody for caring, or she may be try to reconcile their relationship.

 

[JickyJuly]

or she might just be referring to her dude as "the ex" in hopes that it doesn't put off dudes as much as "boyfriend" or "husband". If the two of you talk often, she may have just slipped up and over shared that there is a partner in her life who dislikes private shows while still using "ex". Could be anything. This is why I don't complicate things for my brain and just cop to being married. :lol: No matter the case, it's not really anything to concern yourself or be upset over. You wanted to private. She said not now. Happens all the time.

 

[Evvie]

Maybe they're in to kinky stuff and she likes to call him Professor X in bed.

 

[LaceyRoyce]

I like evvie's explanation best. It fits... *hmm*

 

[katrina4you]

Yeah, as was said earlier... I'd say the threat of losing child custody would be more than enough to keep me from even pursuing this career.

 

[UncleThursday]

Maybe they're in to kinky stuff and she likes to call him Professor X in bed.

I love this explanation. It will be how I think of it from now on.

 

[Evvie]

In all seriousness, I am totally of the opinion that this totes isn't any of our business. I turn down guy's requests for privates all the time, the reason for which has nothing to do with anything.

Just because you are not monogamous with a person does not mean they cannot hold a huge amount of sway in your life. Examples:

If you're living with your ex, on his dime, and he says "I don't want you to do privates," are you going to take private shows or get kicked out?

If your ex says, "we're taking a break right now, but I might take you back if you don't do any privates," are you going to throw away the chance to be with someone you love, or do privates?

If your ex says, "I hate it when you talk to other guys and I might tell the social worker you're a sex worker so I can have the kid," are you going to risk losing your child, or not do privates?

If your ex is your friend, and has manipulated you for his own gains but you think he's helping you, are you going to trust the word of your friend that privates are bad for your soul, or are you going to be a whore for money?

If your ex knows your friends and family, and he says, "I don't want you to do privates," are you going to do privates or risk getting outed or blackmailed?

This chick sounds like she isn't 100% happy with the situation, but when it comes down to it, it might simply be like this:

Should I make someone in my life happy, or should I do privates?

We might argue that oh, woe is her, she's losing out on so much money - but unless you believe that webcam models are stupid whores that need a man (the member) to tell them what to do, as opposed to the other man (her ex boyfriend) or else they're going to get used - you can suck a cock.

It is absolutely possible that this chick doesn't give two damns about privates and doesn't care whether she does them or not. It is also possible that she lies as an excuse to get out of privates.

But in the end, we have to trust that as an adult, she can take care of her own shit - because otherwise, the answer is "lol stupid slut won't do privates for me, i should kick her bf's ass he doesn't know wat hes doin, she should listen to me obviously she can't take care of herself" and that's a pretty stupid way to think.

 

[NicoleRiley]

Maybe that's her code name for her period. Just a thought :lol: