Good thing..... or is it??

[rockin_rod]

I'll make this as concise as I can, but stay with me
Have been a regular of an amazing model for several years, great chemistry and always a fantastic time visiting.
Couple of months ago she got a new day job, but carried on camming during her evenings.
Haven't been able to visit her much since then, as our schedules clash.
She can't maintain doing both jobs, and recently told me she would stop camming altogether at the end of January.
I'm really happy for her (she landed her dream job) and wished her every success.
I visited more in the last week while I've been on vacation, and we had some incredible privates.
Guess on a selfish level, I was making the most of the time before she stops this job.

Anyway, she just sent me a DM and suggested that we keep up the site contact after she stops working, so we can have fun on the weekends when both are available.
Her suggestion is that she will create a new account, I will get age-verified to accept tokens, and then we both contribute an equal amount of tokens and use them to tip each other.
I guess like a password show, or even a private, but not pay-per-minute because it would just be 2 users interacting. And the tokens would go back and forth between us, so only a one-time purchase.
She offered to buy me a Diamo to go with her Lush so our tips would work both ways.

So..... initial thoughts were, what a fun idea, let's do it. Means the great times continue.
But now I'm having misgivings. It's not a trust issue with the sharing of a decent token balance, but all about the fact that this stops being a traditional cam site arrangement, and I don't know what it then becomes.
On a simple level, it's 2 consenting adults meeting up to chat, listen to music, laugh and tip the living daylights out of each other.
But IDK...... am I'm over thinking? It feels like crossing an invisible boundary line towards attachment rather than transactional, and I'm not sure that's a good idea for either of us.

Also, very aware this isn't how sites are supposed to operate; need to recheck the TOS to make sure there is nothing about this idea that breaks rules.

 

[NotYou]

For me it feels weird, I don't know what to call this kind of arrangement, and it seems weird if you are both going to be transferring tokens back and forth, if anything that will look very suspicious for you both and might get you both banned, won't it? Why would she need to send it back to you anyway? What is the point of you buying this one-time payment show for life, then her giving the tokens back, then you back to here the next weekend, and so on? You're allowed to do password shows. I can kind of understand so it doesn't get you in trouble so you are both going on there for free and into a password show, and maybe so it doesn't look like you have paid her off site and get her in trouble.


But if you are doing an arrangement like this, Skype would be easier, if you're not giving her any money so no worries about needing to find somewhere safe to pay her.


The whole thing just seems odd to me. Why would she want to go through the whole process of you both age verifying and tipping back and forth, instead of somewhere like Skype? I know sex is not mean tot be on Skype, but let's face it, it's half of the calls on that program

 

[Ozzie_]

It is a little beyond my ken, but I agree with @Brett M , surely skype would be simpler.

It would still be changing the nature of your relationship, so there is that to consider. But wouldn't it just be becoming an online version of "fuck buddies"? (not an intrinsically bad thing IMO)

 

[KingMarti]

For me it feels weird, I don't know what to call this kind of arrangement, and it seems weird if you are both going to be transferring tokens back and forth, if anything that will look very suspicious for you both and might get you both banned, won't it? Why would she need to send it back to you anyway? What is the point of you buying this one-time payment show for life, then her giving the tokens back, then you back to here the next weekend, and so on? You're allowed to do password shows. I can kind of understand so it doesn't get you in trouble so you are both going on there for free and into a password show, and maybe so it doesn't look like you have paid her off site and get her in trouble.


But if you are doing an arrangement like this, Skype would be easier, if you're not giving her any money so no worries about needing to find somewhere safe to pay her.


The whole thing just seems odd to me. Why would she want to go through the whole process of you both age verifying and tipping back and forth, instead of somewhere like Skype? I know sex is not mean tot be on Skype, but let's face it, it's half of the calls on that program

My guess would be the tipping would be to activate the lovense toys. Having it go off randomly from tips is a lot different from having someone controlling it directly, would also explain why chaturbate and not skype.

 

[NotYou]

My guess would be the tipping would be to activate the lovense toys. Having it go off randomly from tips is a lot different from having someone controlling it directly, would also explain why chaturbate and not skype.

But could they not just use lovense remote app to help control this? This would probably be my choice if this was the situation for me, unless there is something more that i am missing.

 

[KingMarti]

But could they not just use lovense remote app to help control this? This would probably be my choice if this was the situation for me, unless there is something more that i am missing.

Having someone control the lovense via a remote weather a link or the app is a different experiance to having it go off when a tip comes through. the remote app is sluggish, hitting full power with the remote app dosnt push it straight to full power like the tip does, it builds up slower going through the levels....it just feels different and imo not as good.

 

[NotYou]

Having someone control the lovense via a remote weather a link or the app is a different experiance to having it go off when a tip comes through. the remote app is sluggish, hitting full power with the remote app dosnt push it straight to full power like the tip does, it builds up slower going through the levels....it just feels different and imo not as good.

I have only ever used the app once with a model and that was a long time ago, so I have no experience with it. I just assumed, that it would/should be better but i guess it isn't.

 

[Danigirl]

This is really weird...

 

[Smoothie]

Definitely seems unusual.

Could be that she’s hedging her career bets and doesn’t want to fully abandon camming yet. That might explain why she suggested a way to keep the camming experience going, but only with a favorite customer, with no set hours, and no expectation of earning tokens from you in exchange for the experience.

That way, if she ever wanted to return to camming for income, she’s already got a new account and didn’t lose her preferred customer. (But then she’d have squandered the chance to take advantage of her “New” status to gain new customers, so… I don’t know.)

Or maybe she just wants to maintain your company and keep having fun with you in the environment you’re most familiar with? In that case, yes, you’ll have to decide if that crosses a boundary you’re uncomfortable with.

The even exchange of tokens makes sense to me from a toy experience/fairness perspective. But, as others mentioned, I’m wondering if it would be a red flag to cb and end up getting your accounts in trouble.

 

[bbbbadddd]

Yeah, lots of ways to cam together without going through all of that. Tipping doesn't make a whole lot of sense either outside of a cam model circumstance even to activate a toy. It's kind of a clunky way to do things to begin with. Pretty much anything that you can do by tipping, she can do better herself directly.

 

[yummybrownfox]

It just sounds weird to me. And then when you add the word "Chaturbate" to the mix, it just makes me think "Oh, boy..." Lol. Yeah, I don't know about this...

 

[rockin_rod]

For me it feels weird, I don't know what to call this kind of arrangement, and it seems weird if you are both going to be transferring tokens back and forth, if anything that will look very suspicious for you both and might get you both banned, won't it? Why would she need to send it back to you anyway? What is the point of you buying this one-time payment show for life, then her giving the tokens back, then you back to here the next weekend, and so on? You're allowed to do password shows. I can kind of understand so it doesn't get you in trouble so you are both going on there for free and into a password show, and maybe so it doesn't look like you have paid her off site and get her in trouble.


But if you are doing an arrangement like this, Skype would be easier, if you're not giving her any money so no worries about needing to find somewhere safe to pay her.


The whole thing just seems odd to me. Why would she want to go through the whole process of you both age verifying and tipping back and forth, instead of somewhere like Skype? I know sex is not mean tot be on Skype, but let's face it, it's half of the calls on that program

she meant we tip each other, hence the exchange of tokens. Suggested buying a Diamo so both get something out of it. IDK, never used a toy before but might be added fun.......

 

[rockin_rod]

Thanks for the replies. Yeah, I'm definitely feeling the weirdness, but I think it's more about stepping away from the familiar rules of being a paying customer, so this was a surprise. Always been careful to stay within clear customer boundaries.
To clarify a couple of comments on suggested site use, I'd say it's just because we're both very familiar with the CB interface, and know it works with the current laptops/cameras/mics etc. I have used the Lovense Remote app before, but I did not enjoy it - felt totally detatched, selecting patterns is very hit-and-miss, and they always seems to stop just at the wrong time. She said that she wants to go on having fun, but not considering it as paid work.
On the whole, I think I will just decline. Can't get past the feeling this changes things hugely. Glad I asked for opinions

 

[NotYou]

Thanks for the replies. Yeah, I'm definitely feeling the weirdness, but I think it's more about stepping away from the familiar rules of being a paying customer, so this was a surprise. Always been careful to stay within clear customer boundaries.
To clarify a couple of comments on suggested site use, I'd say it's just because we're both very familiar with the CB interface, and know it works with the current laptops/cameras/mics etc. I have used the Lovense Remote app before, but I did not enjoy it - felt totally detatched, selecting patterns is very hit-and-miss, and they always seems to stop just at the wrong time. She said that she wants to go on having fun, but not considering it as paid work.
On the whole, I think I will just decline. Can't get past the feeling this changes things hugely. Glad I asked for opinions

Honestly I'm wondering if by doing it, does she hope you will keep tipping her (and lots?) "for her being so nice and cool to do this" for you, or is there no ulterior motive? Obviously you know her better (even if it's just her cam persona) so it's difficult to comment on this. I think im just a sceptic with something like this... nothing is truly free. It has that feeling of sounding too good to be true, even more so that she is willing to buy you a toy.

What will the REAL cost be?

 

[THE MOLLIE MARIE]

My immediate concern is that this isn't really sustainable because it's going to look really weird to exchange the tokens back and forth between the same two accounts over and over.

But, then there's also a bit of boundary weirdness and an air of, "Why?" that I can't get over. I would maybe try it out and see what happens, seems low risk if you assume as always that tokens spent are gone and that's that. But yeah I just can't relate to this performer's decisions. I would personally always be wondering about the motive.

 

[melanieoncam]

It just sounds weird to me. And then when you add the word "Chaturbate" to the mix, it just makes me think "Oh, boy..." Lol. Yeah, I don't know about this...

That is exactly what I thought. Likely to be some sort of scam in progress.

 

[Deleted member 45270]

Likely to be some sort of scam in progress.

Money going back and forth.. money laundering on her end? Even if they're sending each other equal amounts of tokens, that doesn't mean new money isn't being put into her account.

I really cannot figure it out otherwise. If she truly wanted a personal relationship with you, she'd ask for your email to do free skype/whatever. I'm sorry to say it, but her offer is suspicious, OP..

 

[DJ_Pioneer]

Seems weird to me. I am friends with a few models but it is strictly platonic, this is something completely different. What are your intentions towards her?

 

[Mel1]

I find everything confusing, if she really wanted something with you, it was much simple exchange snap, or skype , or even whatsapp call. Strange.

 

[rockin_rod]

So. I have told her that I'm not comfortable with that arrangement, and suggested if she wants to continue using CB beyond ceasing 'work', however infrequently, I will carry on as a paying customer as I've been for years.
Trust isn't an issue, but it does not feel right moving to a non-paying situation on the site.

 

[Deleted member 45270]

It's a heavy accusation, but the more I think about it, it must be money laundering on her end. There is just no other possible explanation to me, something must be happening to the money on her end for her to do this instead of simply taking your interactions off-site and using toy apps where money isn't involved.

As said, even if an equal amount of tokens are being exchanged, that doesn't mean new money isn't being put in from her end and deposited in a payout method she wants to have (like, say, a prepaid card).


OP, I think you're making the right choice, because if i'm correct, if/when CB finds out with the exchanging tokens deal, they might ban you even though you obviously weren't aware of this, and who's to guarantee the law won't get involved with you?

If I were you, I would question the trust, because if my belief is correct, what exactly was she using your trust to try to accomplish?
I would be especially wary if she responds to your rejection with guilt trips/anger/etc. Nobody in this thread thinks this isn't weird, and for good reason. It sounds fishy.

 

[Derek_Zoolander]

I guess she’s addicted to the sensation of being tipped which can’t be easily replicated elsewhere.

 

[MarieElise]

I'm addicted to Gordon Ramsay's face... (anyways sorry, that wasn't relevant).

I don't know the site or any of these fancy technicalities, but I agree w Mollie Marie that this isn't sustainable. Psychologically it's difficult to make big changes and say Goodbye to good things, and good times. However, sometimes it must be done. Some people really aren't the best at it, and try to kind of do it in a denialist, wishy-washy, weird type way. I'm very guilty of that too, but ultimately it's not realistic or practical. It can also cause others a lot of confusion and sometimes emotional pain. But it comes from a place of being scared of change, the future, and not wanting to let go. Maybe she is experiencing something similar, and trying to over control/ exert some form of control, that she genuinely doesn't have, over the process of change and life. That's just my bias to look at it from a purely psychological and existential perspective though.

 

[rockin_rod]

We had a good discussion last night, and I'm now happy that it was well-intended. She is anxious over giving up that aspect of her life, and said that she just really wanted to maintain contact - but felt it was inappropriate to expect financial contributions when she no longer considers it her job. I said I'm not bothered about that, and would rather keep the status quo whenever she's wanting to catch up online. So I'm relieved.

TBH, now that I think back over the years, there has been mutual support that probably better explains the wish to stay connected. I started visiting CB once I'd got over a very messy long-term marriage break-up, and within a month or so of becoming a regular of hers, both of us had some significant health issues. Found out from a CT scan that I had an inop condition at the same time she was seeing an oncologist (she's recovered now, and I'm grateful for every morning that I wake up still here).
She has been single (by choice) for 4 years, and I have been very clear that I'm not seeking anything beyond the online interactions. So I think the shared journey through health woes and the clear understanding that we both got no-strings fun together (as it should always be) made for relaxed and happy times.

Thanks everyone for your replies and warnings. I'm relieved we can move on as before, without any 'weirdness'!

ETA: Happy New Year all