Lets say I'm walking home alone one night and I get beat up by a group of thugs and robbed
That's very emasculating, I wouldn't like to be a victim of that
Wait.... They robbed your penis?!!! I'm not surprised you wouldn't like to be the victim of penis/balls stealing.
I really don't buy into this macho bullshit that you can have your manhood stolen from you. It only buys into the idea that your masculinity is to do with power and strength and therefore weakness or lack of control makes you lose it and therefore become a weak, subservient woman. If you get mugged then the issue shouldn't be about you being male, it would be just as horrible for a man or a woman to have that happen to them.
And from experience trying to think of things you could have done differently won't make you feel more powerful, it will drive you mad. I have been mugged and have a nasty scar to show it. There was nothing I could have done, a guy chased them who had military training, he ended up with his jaw severely fractured by the bat they were carrying. But yes, people love to blame the victim because we don't want to believe that we are all just sitting ducks. Problem is though, if as a woman you refuse to walk places alone, don't go out at night and won't spend time alone with men etc then you are accused of being paranoid and letting fear control your life. But if you don't live a cautious life and something happens you are told you could have prevented it. Stranger rape often happens during the day, it even happens in completely public places. My ex boyfriends grandmother was raped walking into her home in a retirement community. Was there really anything she could have done differently? And other rapes happen with people you trust and it's impossible to tell if someone will turn out that way. I have had some of the most amazing experiences in the world because I haven't distrusted those around me. Those situations also put me in situations where I could have been vulnerable.
Woman accused a man of sexually assaulting her. He lost his job, got locked up, his wife wound up working two jobs trying to keep from losing everything. After accusing another man, it comes out the woman is mentally unstable. She was just bullshitting pretty much for attention. First man she accused didn't get his job back. She raped him, and to a lesser extent, his family. Send this woman to jail. When she gets out, put her on a sex offender registry. But no, that didn't happen.
These situations always come up when talking to men about rape. It seems to be one of many men's biggest fear of taking rape seriously, is if a woman takes you to court and gets you put in prison when you have committed no crime. These cases do happen, and it is a horrible, horrible thing to do if you were lying. But, it is also a minority of cases. It's not easy to get a sexual assault or rape charge, you need to have sufficient evidence. And if someone pleads innocent it is a long and horrible process to go through for both parties. A lot of legitimate cases get thrown out because there isn't enough evidence of the victims memory is flawed, so I am amazed if a woman wins a case against a guy with no evidence but her own word. I have never known anyone who has been convicted or even taken to court for a sexual offence they did not commit, though I have heard a bunch of men complaining about girls claiming they've been raped by them. I have known girls claiming to be raped and people bullying them for lying (though in some of these cases I'm pretty sure they weren't). The cases I've known where I know the girl was lying she only told one or two people rather than it being public. I have known a lot of women who have been raped or sexually harassed/assaulted though.
This is how bias works though, you take a small percentage of cases (i.e. woman falsely accusing someone of rape and going through the whole court process), but because it's so shocking and scary you get it into your head it is common and a threat. Unfortunately that then makes it much harder for genuine rape victims to come forward and get a conviction, which is the real and most likely case.
Oh, and comparing that to rape is ridiculous and shows you have no idea just how horrific it is for someone to invade your body against your will. It is awful if it's done maliciously and could negatively effect their life, as well as making it much harder for those who've genuinely been raped/attacked to come forward, but it is not the same as rape. There's a reason plenty of people don't believe that going to prison is enough of a punishment for what some rapists do. Because going to prison just doesn't even compare to rape.
It makes me pretty sad to see the lack of empathy for what women have to deal with from men. You focus on a few way less common situations because they might effect you when a woman is opening up and telling you problems she faces on a daily basis. I just read through some of these posts and see the amount of defensiveness, or straight on the attack that women do it too which completely misses the point that statistically next to nothing in comparison. How can you live alongside women and never pay attention to this? How can this not be as close to your hearts as it is for me? We are your lovers, your sisters, your daughters and your mothers, and we have to deal with sexual harassment from ages as young as 12 or less because we are women. Many of us have to deal with sexual advances before we are even physically or mentally ready for sex, sometimes from men much older than us. Many women do not speak openly of such things because they can't handle the backlash and the defensiveness that comes with it. But it does happen, and I have enormous respect for those men who do not turn a blind eye to it and do not try to defend it or use it as a way to fight back and change the subject. I hope one day some of the guys posting here will evolve into those men, but right now not much is showing me that you can have a reasonable discussion about this without trying to derail it. (women falsely accusing men is nothing to do with rape culture btw and is a common derailment)
edit to add-
@SMuser69 Rape and rape culture are different things. People are not saying groping is rape, just that it is a part of rape culture, just as joking about sexually assaulting women for fun is rape culture. It is apart from the act itself but is thought to lead to rape being more socially accepted and the idea of "blurred lines" being in place where it's sometimes ok to rape a woman.
