Daily Thoughts

[Deleted member 57737]

Damn! I'm listening to people talk about these Ayahuasca spiritual trips they've gone on, and talking about how it's truly a terrifying experience that they're grateful for...that it's changed their life, and they come out of it feeling grateful. I was watching clips of it on YouTube. The vomiting that you experience...the shitting on yourself, etc. A soap opera star was talking about it, and said that you're sitting there in this room and you feel like you're stuck sitting in there forever.

I was interested in that for a long time. What put me off is that some people I know who did it became kind of arrogant. In a strange way they consider themselves as superior, spiritually.

Did a lot of acid and shrooms, but as far as I can see that's not comparable in terms of depth of the experience. Although deep enough for me. I'm also not so sure if I really need to explore the whole depth of my psyche. There are enough terrifying things I can see without using incentives. Also these rituals you can take part in sometimes strike me as being a tourist kind of thing. I realized that my individuality doesn't fit into those rituals. For example they often use music in those rituals. Being a musician myself I couldn't deal with that.

I LOVE Changa though. It is by far the strongest thing I ever did. Like Ayahuasca the main agent is DMT. DMT is also produced by your brain when you die and produces the near-death experiences. After you smoke it it comes instantly but only for max. 15 minutes. Makes it much more "handy". Much easier to find out your dosage. No vomiting.

Having said that I don't recommend it to anyone! Just to safe myself from any kind of responsibility. I once took too much (3 hauls, as opposed to 1) and was spastic for 10 minutes. My friends thought I was going to die. But the strange thing was that after that I considered that as a good experience. That might be because I strongly believe that any kind of control is an illusion.

Changa: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Changa_(drug)

Never alone!!! especially not the first time. You'll need a sober trip guide. Have minimum 2 days off any duty after the experience. Your body is fine after one hour but your brain might need time to compute. Inform yourself as much as possible but take any information with a grain of salt especially concerning the dosage. Some guys just want to brag about how much they can take in. As long as there is any kind of fear connected to it, skip it. But thats true for any drug IMO. NEVER while breastfeeding.

 

[yummybrownfox]

Never alone!!! especially not the first time. You'll need a sober trip guide. Have minimum 2 days off any duty after the experience. Your body is fine after one hour but your brain might need time to compute. Inform yourself as much as possible but take any information with a grain of salt especially concerning the dosage. Some guys just want to brag about how much they can take in. As long as there is any kind of fear connected to it, skip it. But thats true for any drug IMO. NEVER while breastfeeding.

Oh, trust me...I wasn't asking for advice because there's no way in Hell I'd do that! Lol. I was just saying it's interesting listening to people talk about what they went through, and how terrifying it is. I'm not interested in drugs/getting high, and I have a fear of throwing up. So yeah, you wouldn't be able to pay me to do this.

 

[Brit]

What put me off is that some people I know who did it became kind of arrogant. In a strange way they consider themselves as superior, spiritually.

Oh god, this is such a huge thing amongst people who do any psychs. There are always these people who get all "woo woo" and talk about how they've seen and talked to (insert deity here) and how they're morally superior to others because they've had this experience. It does get obnoxious, but if they're happier with who they are as a person, then I suppose that's a good thing, even if their actions drive others away. I understand not wanting to become that person yourself though. I feel that when you acknowledge what can be, you will be less likely to become that because it's something that you do not wish to change into. I feel that many of the "better than" people became that way because they either already felt that way beforehand and the drug just helped confirm it or they had zero intentions going into the trip. I could talk about psychs and this kind of stuff all day long, but I don't want people to think I'm some crazy druggie (could be too late) so I'll just stop now.

That might be because I strongly believe that any kind of control is an illusion.

Determinist?

I was just saying it's interesting listening to people talk about what they went through, and how terrifying it is.

I've had a few trips that went south. The last time I did shrooms (and will probably be the last time I ever do them), I saw an alien sitting in a tree outside my window. I, understandably, freaked the fuck out, but realized within 5 seconds that the "alien" was just a weird reflection of lights in my living room. Even though I knew that it wasn't real and was just a reflection, I couldn't unsee the "alien". Even after I went outside, looked at the tree with a flashlight, saw nothing, I was still scared when coming back inside and seeing the reflection in the window. It was dumb and frustrating that I knew what is was, yet the fear part of my brain wasn't agreeing with that knowledge. It did make me think about other irrational fears that I have and how to fix them. That particular trip was one of the more difficult ones that I've had and a lot of not great stuff happened before the alien. I faced a lot of fears that day and it did bring about some positive changes in myself, but I wouldn't want to ever experience that trip again.

 

[yummybrownfox]

I've had a few trips that went south. The last time I did shrooms (and will probably be the last time I ever do them), I saw an alien sitting in a tree outside my window. I, understandably, freaked the fuck out, but realized within 5 seconds that the "alien" was just a weird reflection of lights in my living room. Even though I knew that it wasn't real and was just a reflection, I couldn't unsee the "alien". Even after I went outside, looked at the tree with a flashlight, saw nothing, I was still scared when coming back inside and seeing the reflection in the window. It was dumb and frustrating that I knew what is was, yet the fear part of my brain wasn't agreeing with that knowledge. It did make me think about other irrational fears that I have and how to fix them. That particular trip was one of the more difficult ones that I've had and a lot of not great stuff happened before the alien. I faced a lot of fears that day and it did bring about some positive changes in myself, but I wouldn't want to ever experience that trip again.

In one of the YouTube videos (Where the woman was describing her bad trip), she said she felt herself turning into a snake...and she was concerned that that's what she is now...a snake. She said the shaman told her that 9 PM is the time the aliens will communicate with him, and he'll do the chanting.

 

[Deleted member 57737]

I could talk about psychs and this kind of stuff all day long, but I don't want people to think I'm some crazy druggie (could be too late) so I'll just stop now.

I know the feeling. Still I think its important to talk about that from time to time because tripping always was a part of humanity. And with all that misinformation going on in the wake of the "war against drugs" and similar crusades its important to share first hand information.

 

[Deleted member 57737]

So many people lost their homes here in Germany due to the floods. I can't begin to imagine what that must be like. So sorry! Still there are people who deny climate change. But when the car industry makes politics, what can you expect? Many victims worked the better part of their lives to build their existence. All gone.

 

[AmazingAlexaNY]

just venting here but people think my private show rate is high 60/min.... i think its decent i mean 60/min is only 3$ per min for me..... i think viewers dont get that....


what is the most common rate? anything lower then 30/min is just too cheap..... so.... i normally do 60/min or 42/min if in my fan-club....

 

[Brit]

just venting here but people think my private show rate is high 60/min.... i think its decent i mean 60/min is only 3$ per min for me..... i think viewers dont get that....


what is the most common rate? anything lower then 30/min is just too cheap..... so.... i normally do 60/min or 42/min if in my fan-club....

60/min is not high at all and is probably the most common rate. Don't let people make you feel bad for your rates. You're worth it.

 

[yummybrownfox]

just venting here but people think my private show rate is high 60/min.... i think its decent i mean 60/min is only 3$ per min for me..... i think viewers dont get that....


what is the most common rate? anything lower then 30/min is just too cheap..... so.... i normally do 60/min or 42/min if in my fan-club....

Keep it at 60 tokens/minute. Those guys are just being cheap. 60 tokens per minute is the private show rate on MyFreeCams (It's set that way, and models can't change it). Back in the day when I actually had a good camscore on there and made good money, I had a regular who had no problem paying the "true private" rate of 80 tokens/minute so it could be just the two of us with no one spying.

Also, I think the problem is that, from what I've read on here, some models on Chaturbate have set their private show rates really low. I've read that some models are setting theirs at 12 tokens/minute (And that could go as low as 6 tokens/minute?). So some of these guys are getting spoiled, and then coming to your room acting all outraged that you - *GASP* - actually have your live sex show priced at a normal rate.

You want shows with men who appreciate that this is a job (And cam models are a luxury...not a necessity), and aren't gonna sit there trying to negotiate with you like it's a yard sale.

 

[yummybrownfox]

This commercial is hilarious. I just private messaged my mom and my grandmom on Facebook to show it to them. LOL.

 

[AmazingAlexaNY]

one more thing i don't allow recording at 60/min. for enabling recording would i be better off at say 90/min or just charging some extra tokens to enable it. just wondering.

 

[yummybrownfox]

I really wish I could change that awful tip sound on MyFreeCams to the audio of Method Man (from Wu Tang's "C.R.E.A.M.") saying "Dolla dolla bill, y'all!"

 

[yummybrownfox]

Watching stuff like this cheers me up. Seth Meyers is too adorable.

 

[Deleted member 57737]

Take this with a grain of salt!


(or maybe not salt)

 

[GoddessV]

View attachment 89112

Damn, did a double take because I forgot metric system was a thing.

 

[MarieElise]

Lol

Take this with a grain of salt!


(or maybe not salt)


View attachment 89112

I just stared at and examined that chart for WAY too long!
(I'm not allowed to have regular traditional sex for 6 weeks due to surgery).

 

[yummybrownfox]

I can't believe I just had to ask a Lyft driver if she's been drinking. Her driving was bad enough for another driver to pull up beside her (at a red light) and ask "Um...are you okay to be driving?"

I actually do not think she was drunk. I think she's just a terrible driver who made abrupt stops, and can't drive straight or smooth, and I think she kept looking down at her GPS...which she was frustrated with, claiming that the GPS was messing up the route. She missed the turn to get on Route __ (After I'd told her beforehand that she'll need to make a left turn there), and then was asking me how to get back on to Route __. So I had to guide her. It's annoying to have to pay for a $20+ ride, and still have to give directions, because you don't know what the fuck you're doing.

I still tipped her, but I reported it as a safety issue/concern to Lyft, and it says I will not be matched with that driver again.

 

[Finchomatic]

I don't remember my butt getting flat. When the hell did that happen?

 

[MarieElise]

Why in the name of the Holy am I awake right now? Dear God I only just went to bed 2 hours ago. Aaaaaaaarg ...

 

[bud9752]

I don't remember my butt getting flat. When the hell did that happen?

you play games 22 hours a day don't you

 

[yummybrownfox]

I won 2nd place in the talent contest. The girl who won 1st place is an ex-friend of mine, but I'm gonna be civil and congratulate her anyway when I see her at karaoke night again.

 

[Finchomatic]

you play games 22 hours a day don't you

I don't game. I'm on my feet at work 9-10 hours per day. Then sit for about 3-4h hours in a day on average when at home.
I just need to start some sort of workout, but just physically and mentally worn out after work. Part of getting older I guess

 

[Deleted member 57737]

I don't get American exceptionalism. Why? How?

I think its counterproductive and isolating. If you look at it in a psychological way: Someone who has to remind him/herself of their own superiority all the time already knows deep down that it's a lie. Otherwise he/her wouldn't have to point it out all the time. You always hear: "We have the best and brightest..." It has the potential to make the "others" angry. Especially when its very clear that there are many things that other countries do better than America.

Am I missing something?

I love many aspects of America, most of all the people. And maybe this forum is the wrong place to rant about it. Cam models are mostly not the ones I'm talking about. So I'm sorry if I offended someone. But can someone explain to me why America is supposed to be better than other countries?

In my country the last group of people who where exceptionalists where the Nazis.

 

[Brit]

I don't get American exceptionalism. Why? How?

American exceptionalism is a thing because America is exceptional. Well, was exceptional. I don't think it's really all that special anymore and hasn't been for a very very long time. The problem is that reality just hasn't caught up to many people so they're still stuck thinking that America is the greatest country on earth. The issue, as with most things, is multifaceted. What follows are my brief, overly simplified, and generalized thoughts.

While other countries have a shared culture based upon history, America's shared culture is that of individualism - self > family > government. Other cultures at the time were more government (queen/king) > family > self.

Looking back, America was founded on individualism. They could afford to be individualistic because, well, they were cut off from the rest of the world's societies via oceans. Individualism is a key tenet of America and is baked into the Constitution and Declaration of Independence. The big societies/cultures of the time did not give much flexibility for an individual to become whoever they wanted to be. You were born in a certain class, you tended to stay in that class. Your father was a blacksmith, you would probably be one too. People weren't really "free" in many different ways. America was like,

"Hey peeps over there! We got huge chunks of land for everyone. You can do whatever you want with it and be the most free you've ever been. Here's how you can vote for someone to represent you. Here's how you can talk shit about dumb things that your representatives do. No kings or queens allowed! No giving money to royalty who engorge themselves with riches while you can barely feed yourself. All money you earn is yours to keep, save for some taxes to help defend our country and to help make it more awesome!

PS Here's a gun to defend your property and to also use against the government in case they fuck up"

People (well, white men) were promised a new and better way of life - self rule and near complete individual freedom

Exceptionalism started here. America said fuck you to Great Britain and soundly beat them. Conveniently, people forgot that other countries helped them gain their independence and America may not have even won their war without help from the outside. Within 100 years, other countries began to give their citizens more freedom. Perhaps because of "brain drain". Perhaps because their citizens demanded. Perhaps a combination. I don't really know as my historical literacy isn't very high. However, what followed was other countries began to surpass and still continue to surpass America's claim to individual freedom. Because America's shared cultural value is individualism, accepting that another country is doing "individualism" better is an affront to one's core identity. Defensiveness often includes "digging in" and becoming blind. Thus, regardless of proof showing the contrary, many Americans still believe that they have the most freedom of anyone in the world. Because they deeply value personal freedom/individualism, they perceive themselves as being exceptional.

There are, of course, many other facets that help build upon the idea of their exceptionalism, such as prowess in war, inventors, "firsts", etc, but this is already long enough. Hopefully it's somewhat helpful and what you were looking for.

 

[Deleted member 57737]

Wow, thank you soooo much for your thoughts @Brit . That makes it much more clear to me. And from the historical perspective your thoughts make a lot of sense. Much more sense than anything I tried to figure out about it myself. I think like many things exceptionalism can lead to fanatism which is always bad and dangerous. I guess whats bothering me about it is the fact that for fighting future global problems like climate change or general pollution we all need to play in the same team and that single persons or countries don't have the right to pollute the environment more than any other person or country. Its just one example out of many that make it clear that isolation won't solve anything.

 

[Brit]

I think like many things exceptionalism can lead to fanatism

I really appreciate your inclusion of the word "can" here.

which is always bad and dangerous.

Is fanaticism always bad and dangerous though? Would you consider someone who is fanatic about protecting our planet as bad and dangerous? How far would that individual need to go with their fanaticism to be considered bad? Extreme fanaticism, which causes harm to others, I feel is always bad and dangerous, yeah. Fanaticism itself, I'm not so sure it's such a bad thing.

I guess whats bothering me about it is the fact that for fighting future global problems like climate change or general pollution we all need to play in the same team and that single persons or countries don't have the right to pollute the environment more than any other person or country. Its just one example out of many that make it clear that isolation won't solve anything.

While it may seem like it, based upon all the hate the US gets (and some of it is deserved tbf), I don't think that the US is the main problem. The issue is consumerism and greed. Greed by individuals to have more and more so they can stay on top. These people entice and use psychological tactics to encourage the commoners to buy more products. People consume because we need to. We need to "keep up with the Jones's" because if we don't, then we become ostracized by whatever society we live in. This society has been shaped by those on top as they control the message. Yes, many of these corporations are based in the US, but things can be changed on an individual level if we all just stopped buying things that we don't really need.

I feel that Europeans often have this "holier than thou" attitude when it comes to their American counterparts and their consumerism. The thing is though, if Europeans had the same amount of space that Americans have, they would probably be just as guilty with filling that space with unnecessary things. We are all guilty. Regardless, isolationism sounds great on paper, but just as each country impacts another, so too does each person's choices impact another's. A small stone can create a large ripple. The best we can do is try to be as conscience as we can and encourage others to be the same way. Fanaticism? Maybe. Perhaps fanaticism light.

 

[Deleted member 57737]

Is fanaticism always bad and dangerous though? Would you consider someone who is fanatic about protecting our planet as bad and dangerous? How far would that individual need to go with their fanaticism to be considered bad? Extreme fanaticism, which causes harm to others, I feel is always bad and dangerous, yeah. Fanaticism itself, I'm not so sure it's such a bad thing.

You have a point. What I would consider to be too fanatic in that regard would be people who reject any plastic. While we know that the production of plastic is harmful to our planet, live wouldn't work without it. I think parents who let their children use wooden toys instead of plastic is a good thing. But demanding from a hospital not to use plastic is super fanatic and just stupid. The thing is, that I believe that our planet can take a little bit pollution. like maybe 5% of what we are doing now.

I feel that Europeans often have this "holier than thou" attitude when it comes to their American counterparts and their consumerism. The thing is though, if Europeans had the same amount of space that Americans have, they would probably be just as guilty with filling that space with unnecessary things. We are all guilty. Regardless, isolationism sounds great on paper, but just as each country impacts another, so too does each person's choices impact another's. A small stone can create a large ripple. The best we can do is try to be as conscience as we can and encourage others to be the same way. Fanaticism? Maybe. Perhaps fanaticism light.

Yes, actually I believe that Europeans are by no means better than Americans in the regard of consumerism. Always hard to generalize.

 

[Just_A_Guy]

fanatic about protecting our planet

Personally,I believe that is really one of the main issues of our times. And sure, individual actions count and matter but they can only do much unless guidelines, goals, and ways to achieve them are being set and shared, in this case, among the countries of the World. BTW, this is my way of thinking, not only with regard to this topic, in particular, but in general.

The EU, by 2030, if i remember correctly, will have cut C02 emissions by 50-60 so as to reach pre 1990 levels, I believe. And a lot has been done in most of the major European cities over the last years, I would say. For instance, plasting bags and such aren't sold anymore and the bag you usually get form the stores or the mall or when you go grocery shopping usually is recycled. Traffic limited zones and public city bikes are nowadays common in most of the major European cities as well.

I'm sure you know that the US, which is one of the main responsible, along whith China and India, for the C02 emission actually withdrew from the agreement previously shared. Only couple of months ago has pledge to rejoin, If I'm not mistaken.

Also, on the topic of the plastic, especially the one floating into our oceans and rivers, I've watched few years ago a great documentary called A plastic Ocean, possibly is still on Netflix. It's really a well-done documentary.

 

[MarieElise]

Why are groups, bands and solo artists always spelling shit weird in new tracks? Did we run out of new titles, and now we gotta make up words? Or is it just supposed to make them cooler? Some of them are mixing upper and lower case, I mean what.. the fuck..?? This don't make any sense to me What is it about spelling shit wrong that makes a person a trendsetter, gangsta or whatever? It really doesn't make any logical sense

 

[Brit]

Personally,I believe that is really one of the main issues of our times.

Same. Our house is falling apart, water and sewage are coming into our basement, the attic is on fire, and we're just like "oh, this is fine."

And sure, individual actions count and matter but they can only do much unless guidelines, goals, and ways to achieve them are being set and shared

Of course, but we have little influence over what our own country does, let alone another country. Money talks and those with money often pull the strings. If people try to be ethical consumers, then they are pulling the strings of the corporations, which in turn will pull the strings of governments in a positive way. Sad that this is the way it is, but greed is a very powerful motivator.

The EU, by 2030, if i remember correctly, will have cut C02 emissions by 50-60 so as to reach pre 1990 levels, I believe.

The EU has something that the US doesn't have - cohesion. There is very little space in Europe. This causes people to better understand the ramifications of "if it affects my neighbor, then I'll be affected too". The US is massive and a huge draw of moving there was personal responsibility and freedom. Your land was yours and it's up to you to protect it. Property in the EU is mostly shared. I feel that this is why you'll see higher concentration of people who care about the environment living in bigger cities in the States while those who grew up and live somewhere with lots of space tend to be less concerned with a neighbor's problem.

I'm sure you know that the US, which is one of the main responsible, along whith China and India, for the C02 emission actually withdrew from the agreement previously shared. Only couple of months ago has pledge to rejoin, If I'm not mistaken.

It's funny (well, not really funny, but I can't think of the word I want to use) how climate change is now such a political issue. I read an in depth article the other day about how it became that way, but can't find it. I did, however, find this one and it provides a nice little snapshot. The reason why the US withdrew (well, the main reason given) was because of "loss of jobs and livelihoods" Trump made it sound as though the US would become weak if the US was no longer able to do the various types of work that cause pollution. The Trump presidency was a dark time for progress. But, as you wrote, the US is rejoining the agreement. There is hope, but it will be hard fought due to the lobbying done by corporations. This is why I feel it's so important to do as much as we can on an individual level. If enough individuals show a corporation that it is no longer profitable for them to create x product or work in y sector, then they will move onto something that is profitable, yet more environmentally friendly.

-----

Some of them are mixing upper and lower case, I mean what.. the fuck..??

Unless it's changed, I believe that the mixing denotes sarcasm. For example a song titled "lIfE iS gReAt" could be saying life is great, but it really isn't.