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Anyone finding this hobby to be more and more of an exercise in frustration?

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Dec 31, 2016
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Just a small rant. It's ironic how I visit cam sites to blow off steam but often end up with blue balls instead. For me, one of the following is almost guaranteed to happen:

1. Model looks fine in the thumbnail preview, but when I enter, there's technical difficulties abound (poor cam quality, stuttering, low audio).
2. See an interesting model from an English territory (US/GB/CA), but it turns out to be someone from Europe larping (she can't even speak fluent English).
3. Someone manages to steal a model away for an exclusive seconds before I do. I wait for her, but she never returns.
4. Model returns from a show but looks like she's in a completely different state of mind/appearance (likely from what your average degenerate customer had her do), turning me off completely.
5. I'm in the mood, but nobody I care for is online.
6. I'm in the mood and a model I like is online, but something suddenly goes down in real life, tearing me away.

Call it a personal problem, but there it is. Scheduling seems like the definitive solution, but there's no easy system in place for that, nor do most models care for that level of timeliness. And, obviously, I can't predict when I'm going to be horny, heh.
 
Just a small rant. It's ironic how I visit cam sites to blow off steam but often end up with blue balls instead. For me, one of the following is almost guaranteed to happen:

1. Model looks fine in the thumbnail preview, but when I enter, there's technical difficulties abound (poor cam quality, stuttering, low audio).
2. See an interesting model from an English territory (US/GB/CA), but it turns out to be someone from Europe larping (she can't even speak fluent English).
3. Someone manages to steal a model away for an exclusive seconds before I do. I wait for her, but she never returns.
4. Model returns from a show but looks like she's in a completely different state of mind/appearance (likely from what your average degenerate customer had her do), turning me off completely.
5. I'm in the mood, but nobody I care for is online.
6. I'm in the mood and a model I like is online, but something suddenly goes down in real life, tearing me away.

Call it a personal problem, but there it is. Scheduling seems like the definitive solution, but there's no easy system in place for that, nor do most models care for that level of timeliness. And, obviously, I can't predict when I'm going to be horny, heh.


I feel for you, man :)
 
btw, frequenting cam model sites can become addictive very fast.
Have you been a user since a long ?

You may feel frustration after a while, past the first weeks or months of discovery.
You don't yet realize that you're addict and your drug is refused to you or does not still have this same taste.
Take some days of rest, then go back with a bit of distance in mind, you could find there other flavors.
 
If you're expecting a model with a high quality stream, who speaks English, who keeps regular hours, who doesn't take shit from boundary pushers, where you know what to expect, AND you're so picky that you can't find a model you like out of more than 1000... Well, you're going to generally need to pay more.

If you're bargain hunting, or want to get a show with a new model every time, then yes, it will be more difficult, you'll wind up with blue balls more often. Enjoy the hunt, or change your own behaviour.

I'm with you on the scheduling issue. My Skype guys know that I'm online when I'm online, and if they're online, too, that's when shows happen. Scheduling a boner for 3pm next Tuesday never works out.

As for #1, technical issues, though... Let us know! Some of it I can instantly fix, other times I just need to reboot. Usually even regulars don't bother to mention anything is wrong. Being legitimately helpful can get you "IOU 1 flash" in your notes for next time.
 
Just a small rant. It's ironic how I visit cam sites to blow off steam but often end up with blue balls instead. For me, one of the following is almost guaranteed to happen:

1. Model looks fine in the thumbnail preview, but when I enter, there's technical difficulties abound (poor cam quality, stuttering, low audio).
2. See an interesting model from an English territory (US/GB/CA), but it turns out to be someone from Europe larping (she can't even speak fluent English).
3. Someone manages to steal a model away for an exclusive seconds before I do. I wait for her, but she never returns.
4. Model returns from a show but looks like she's in a completely different state of mind/appearance (likely from what your average degenerate customer had her do), turning me off completely.
5. I'm in the mood, but nobody I care for is online.
6. I'm in the mood and a model I like is online, but something suddenly goes down in real life, tearing me away.

Call it a personal problem, but there it is. Scheduling seems like the definitive solution, but there's no easy system in place for that, nor do most models care for that level of timeliness. And, obviously, I can't predict when I'm going to be horny, heh.

You should probably just build a bigger follow list, mine is massive. If I login and someone I like isn't online then CB is having technical difficulties cause that's the only way that's going to happen :giggle:
 
Idk man, have you considered maybe custom videos being a better avenue? I have more than a few very picky customers, and quite a few like you, custom videos may be a better fit that give you greater control over the product and experience you’re wanting.

I no longer offer live cams except at extremely obscene rates, but I do lots of texting and phone calls with my custom clients, even a few that will schedule and wait so they can chat with me while they watch their videos. Not quite “live”, but it fits schedules and personalities better. Might be a more satisfying avenue.
 
genuine question. have you thought about speaking to someone like a counselor or therapist about your masturbation habits? if you are feeling this much negativity towards something that you normally use to destress isn't a good thing man.
3. Someone manages to steal a model away for an exclusive seconds before I do. I wait for her, but she never returns.
gotta be quicker, my man. don't ask if someone is ready for a show, just take them. this is such a common occurrence on streamate. i constantly have someone asking about taking me to show only for someone else to scoop me up before they can. i think it's a game for some of these dudes.
4. Model returns from a show but looks like she's in a completely different state of mind/appearance (likely from what your average degenerate customer had her do), turning me off completely.

camming is mostly a physical activity. even if it's just using a hitachi can make me change in mood and work up a sweat. orgasms make me feel different. i get accused regularly of being on drugs after camshows where i had multiple orgasms. if you give them maybe 3-5 minutes to freshen up, calm down from the excitement, and drink some water, maybe you will have a different experience. and trust me, most average camshows aren't by any means "degenerate." they are quite vanilla and tame.

i agree that custom videos might be up your ally. also you might want to try skype shows. check out cammodel directory or skyprivate.
 
camming is mostly a physical activity. even if it's just using a hitachi can make me change in mood and work up a sweat. orgasms make me feel different. i get accused regularly of being on drugs after camshows where i had multiple orgasms. if you give them maybe 3-5 minutes to freshen up, calm down from the excitement, and drink some water, maybe you will have a different experience. and trust me, most average camshows aren't by any means "degenerate." they are quite vanilla and tame.

i agree that custom videos might be up your ally. also you might want to try skype shows. check out cammodel directory or skyprivate.

Totally agree with this. We're human beings, so of COURSE we're going to feel different. We're not robots. That's why people seek out cammodels, yes? They want an interaction with a person. For me, some of the best sessions can end with me being disheveled and in a different state. And it's important to remember no one 'has' us do anything. I offer what I offer, and that's between me and the member and the site/ their TOS. Shame is toxic. For you too.

I also think giving a few minutes for someone to recalibrate is a good idea. If you're able to, one thing that I can tell you *I* would certainly appreciate, is if you take her private and THEN offer her those couple of minutes. You've initiated a generous human interaction, and that shows your appreciation, and you can get no better interaction than when the performer/model feels appreciated. If the model is fine without that and wants to get into things right away, take them at their word.

If you'd rather not/cannot pay for that time, which is totally fine, wait a couple of minutes when she's back.
 
1. Model looks fine in the thumbnail preview, but when I enter, there's technical difficulties abound (poor cam quality, stuttering, low audio).

Streamate is notorious for being glitchy. It'll tell us on our end that everything is fine, but for viewers we'll be freezing or our audio is off. We don't know there's a problem if nobody tells us.
4. Model returns from a show but looks like she's in a completely different state of mind/appearance (likely from what your average degenerate customer had her do), turning me off completely.

As much as people like to keep believing it, the average camsite member isn't what any reasonable person would consider a degenerate, unless you think wanting to see some tiddies is absolutely disgusting. If a model just spent 20 minutes straight shaking her ass or having orgasms, of course she's going to look different than beforehand. The term "cumdrunk" exists for a reason, some people can appear inebriated after a good orgasm. I've been so out of sorts after a good fucking that I stood in my kitchen for 5 minutes staring at the cupboards and trying to remember how to make a PBJ :haha:
 
We don't know there's a problem if nobody tells us.

You can always browse your own site on another PC or another Browser on any site.
It will not use 'upstream' bandwith and will show you how your cam is really streamed.

This, for video , it's more difficult for the sound as you risk Larsen or at least to produce an echoe
 
You can always browse your own site on another PC or another Browser on any site.
It will not use 'upstream' bandwith and will show you how your cam is really streamed.

This, for video , it's more difficult for the sound as you risk Larsen or at least to produce an echoe

Not really ideal, you'll appear distracted and not interested in your chat and customers may leave. In addition, it's not unusual for some customers to be experiencing issues while others aren't, so we may see a clear stream when we view ourselves but then several customers don't.

If someone mentions my feed being glitchy, I have them refresh first, and if it's still acting up I refresh on my end. Sometimes the customer refreshing fixes the problem and I don't need to do anything, sometimes not. I've had more than one person come into my chat and after about 30 seconds, type "your feed isn't loading, I'm going to refresh", which is nice because if they come back and it's not working, I know they already tried that and I don't have to waste time having them try it again. It would be ideal if Streamate would just fix whatever is causing so many problems with feeds loading so we don't have to do do this back-and-forth refreshing dance, but until then - communicating feed issues is important, and if they still have the option onscreen for members to report feed issues to support, using that function would be gravy.
 
4. Model returns from a show but looks like she's in a completely different state of mind/appearance (likely from what your average degenerate customer had her do), turning me off completely.

The reg who takes me for longer privates is no degenerate- he just enjoys making me cum over and over and over- nothing insane going on; just him making my lush go nuts.
Before leaving my room, I usually tell people that I'll be back- which I feel holds me a little bit accountable as well (sometimes it's so tiring that I don't have the motivation to log back on!), so I feel like I am doing something good for anyone who may be waiting for me to return. If I look absolutely insane- which happens- then I will take a few minutes to freshen up, but otherwise I'm told I look like I'm glowing (sweat).
 
The reg who takes me for longer privates is no degenerate- he just enjoys making me cum over and over and over- nothing insane going on; just him making my lush go nuts.
Before leaving my room, I usually tell people that I'll be back- which I feel holds me a little bit accountable as well (sometimes it's so tiring that I don't have the motivation to log back on!), so I feel like I am doing something good for anyone who may be waiting for me to return. If I look absolutely insane- which happens- then I will take a few minutes to freshen up, but otherwise I'm told I look like I'm glowing (sweat).

Ahh, to me that is when I know it’s been a great private. Having a long-standing relationship with a model let’s you both really know what makes the other tick. Or, cum, in this case.
 
If you're expecting a model with a high quality stream, who speaks English, who keeps regular hours, who doesn't take shit from boundary pushers, where you know what to expect, AND you're so picky that you can't find a model you like out of more than 1000... Well, you're going to generally need to pay more.

If you're bargain hunting, or want to get a show with a new model every time, then yes, it will be more difficult, you'll wind up with blue balls more often. Enjoy the hunt, or change your own behaviour.

I agree with this. It sounds like you are looking for lower priced models, which is okay but you will need to understand that with a cam show, like anything else, you get what you pay for. Those of us with average - higher prices base our rates on how much time and money we invest into our equipment and performance, as well as level of experience. Many of us have put thousands of dollars and many years into this, and we give ourselves regular raises for it. :)

As for the model looking different after a show, I often do too. Some things we do that seem simple can be exhausting. I have a regular who only wants me to show off my ass for 10 minutes. Sounds simple, and I do enjoy it, but it absolutely KILLS my lower back. Give me a couple of minutes and I'll be good to go.
 
All the things you listed happens from time to time, I guess, to anyone visiting camsites on a regular basis. Bad nights happen, but it shouldn't ALWAYS be like that. When was the last time you had fun? Because from the way you wrote, it seems like it has been a long time? If that's the case... you should perhaps try to go online less often. I also find myself less satisfied if I go online too often...maybe that could help?
 
Average degenerate custumer ... well nah. Average is not my thing. I mean, go big or go home! Give me those "satanic pregnancies" in pvt or I'm out of there. /s
Fuck man! It is too damn hard to keep a straight face when I’m filming those.🤦‍♀️

I’ve filmed like three or four... it is impossible not to laugh!🤷‍♀️
 
The one thing I get frustrated with this 'hobby' is when people (broadcaster or fellow member) vanish without a trace. And you are left to wonder what happened.
When you develop with what you thought was some sort of friendship regardless of it just one being online, and the person just vanishes and ghosts everyone.

Yes, we all live our own lives and we really don't owe anyone anything in having to explain ourselves when it comes to this 'hobby', but a proper goodbye would be nice at times. :)
And I really cannot apologize for being a human with emotions and feelings. There are days I wish I could shed those things from my person and live without feeling. It would make things much easier in life.
 
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