@Shy Cam Guy Here's what I think he should do. It's important not to skip any of these steps:
- Tell her plainly that he wants to be her boyfriend, not her customer, thus he won't be spending on cam anymore. Do not obfuscate or be subtle about the conversation, and mean every word!
- IMPORTANT: Stick to his guns and hold off on any financial assistance for preferably at least a month.
- If she requests his presence in her cam room, or wants him providing "inspiration" while she works, fine, but don't pay for it.
- Insist that their personal "real" sex life happen only using other, vanilla apps (this helps provide a psychological distance between him as a boyfriend vs cam customer, and also prevents her from dividing her attention and profiting off their private sex life).
- If he wants to send her any money later on, he should do it through some vanilla, non-cam-related means (again, makes him distinct from a customer). It should be a gift, not a loan. It should NOT be in exchange for services of any kind. He should not go above and beyond what one might expect from a normal boyfriend.
- See how it plays out.
Basically it boils down to... just be her boyfriend, nothing more, and see what happens! See if she's cool with that dynamic. He should also see if he's cool with the relationship once she's no longer in performance mode. Does he like the real person? This is going to require him to be mindful, and when they interact, ask himself whether the interaction he's having is normal in a vanilla long distance relationship. If it's not, stop, correct the dynamic, and get back to the vanilla relationship.
I lived in Spain for a bit, and they have a lot of schwarma in southern Spain. They were glorious, but it explains why there was no vegetarian option, lol! Obviously a Spanish schwarma is still a bastardization of the original, so I bet it's even better in your neck of the woods!