Fay_Galore said:
How can you justify being a camgirl yourself and not wanting your SO to spend any time on camsites? As long as he's not spending half his wages or obsessively following a model, I think there is no problem and even actually kind of healthy, to balance it out.
Because as I just explained several times, there is a big difference between camming and being a member. Some girls would be ok with this, but I'm not. It's also not a problem seeing as my boyfriend has never been to a camsite in his life and since being with me watches porn like once a month if that. I have no issue with porn, I even encourage it. But not camgirls, for me that's too close. My boyfriend works 50 hour weeks and we barely get by paying the bills. If he were then spending what little free time he gets watching and wanking over other women that he's actually interacting with then we'd have a lot of issues in our relationship. If this were real life and he were having these relationships with girls he knows from real life (even if he never met up with them) I would see it as being similar to that. The difference is that with a camgirl she isn't into him, it's just him being into her, which for me is a problem.
As a camgirl I strip, chat and pose. I don't watch cams though or form any attraction to members, all they can do is see me. I may be doing the motions of sexual things, but there is no emotional attachment, and I'm very much doing my job. A job that I find fun, but relatively platonic. I'd be completely ok with my boyfriend modelling if that were what he wanted to do.
Like I said before, it's fine if you're ok with that, but if you're ok with something it doesn't mean everyone else has to be. It's not something that's ever been an issue in my relationship as my boyfriend has zero interest in it, but I did once date a guy who I met on mfc, and though I never said to him "don't go on camsites", there was a time where he'd told me he had no money and I saw him in another girls room dropping a massive tip bomb. This was also when I was super struggling on cam and she was currently in the top 100 and a consistently high earner. I had issues with that for a whole bunch of reasons, the whole thing wasn't going to last anyway, but because of that I cut him off as a friend as well as a boyfriend. I knew that after that for a lot of reasons I wasn't ok with going out with a guy who goes to camsites.
One of the issues with camsites in general is they're very addictive. Porn is addictive, but camsites like myfreecams are porn mixed with social media. Things like facebook are now being associated with loneliness and depression because they give us a venue to be really social, without ever actually being social. Camsites are the same but worse. They give members socialisation, sexual intimacy, they can actually see the model moving around so for them it feels like they're hanging out with someone, when for a model she just sees words on a screen. We're both social and sexual creatures, we crave it, but we live in a world where there are so many people that it can be hard to find the type of socialisation we want, it's easy to feel socially anxious and often alone, even when you're surrounded by people. Myfreecams gives in to all of these desires, the intimacy and friendship without the pressure, without the risk of rejection, and all the sexual parts too but again without the risk.
I would imagine that members who visit camsites will find it very difficult to quit, even if they only watched one model (you) before and are actually with you, they will go back to the camsite craving that routine of having friendship in a box. If a member has been on a camsite for long enough that he's formed a real relationship with a model then it's fairly safe to assume he's hooked. If you don't want to be with someone who visits camsites then don't go out with a member. It's unlikely he will ever quit for good, it's part of his habit, his routine. He clearly likes camsites enough to want to be on them a whole bunch, and if he's a decent guy then it's probably not because he couldn't be around people in real life, but because he's choosing to be on a camsite instead.
If you went out with a member I don't think it'd be unreasonable to hope or ask that he'd stop visiting other models, but I do think it'd be unlikely that he will. I do think though that it'd be unfair for a member to date a model and ask her to quit her job. For a member it's just a bit of fun social interaction and sexual gratification. Quitting will probably cause him no issues except for missing it a bit, in fact it'd probably be healthy to take a break, and there's always porn and old videos. For a model it's her livelihood. Possibly her only income or at least her only way to make income. As far as I can tell for most models camming was a last resort rather than a first choice. For whatever reason it was the best option or even the only way to make what she needs to survive.
