Things Members Say That Make You Go "WTF?"

[ThunderWeasel]

... someone needs to lay off the Mission:Impossible marathons...

 

[JerryBoBerry]

Got this MFC mail today.

There's a dude in desperate need of a good tin foil hat.

 

[SaffronBurke]

I'm not saying your name, dude. Also, 99.9% chance this dude's as white as me. He was popping into a few model's rooms last night/this morning, saying "hi" with the hopes that we'd respond with "hi, (username)". Uh, no.

 

[BettyDemure]

My favorite was when someone in my room tipped me to "pet my tribble" which actually is a small, furry, non-sexual toy I have. So I picked up the toy, started petting it, turned on the "coo" sound it makes, and started saying things like "do you like that, baby?" and joking around. The guy who tipped thought it was funny, as did I. But there was a lurker premium in the room that got upset with this; he said that I had "stolen the tip" (that wasn't his, mind you, he'd just been sitting there lurking and waiting for something to happen) and that I was a "bitch for lying" about what I was going to do. Cracked me up that someone got mad at it, and then left saying he'd never come back. Awww, I lost a lurker that hadn't tipped in 4 days or said a single word, ever - bummer!

I don't know if it's already been covered (probably has in 324 pages), but I also get a lot of "Got milk?" - I'm thinking I may start popping to the fridge when they ask.

 

[bud9752]

a Dyslexic GINGER

 

[SaffronBurke]

We're all familiar with mmmtards. Well, today, I had a dude who was doing that with h's. I say hi to him, he says hhhhhhhhhhhh. He asks where I'm from, I say Pluto, he says hhhhhhhhhhhh. Pretty much responded to everything I said with hhhhhhhhhhhh.

 

[Ann_Sulu]

a Dyslexic GINGER

 

[lunarxkittn]

I had a member come into my room and insist that he was a famous person and that I should meet up with them. And then they went on to say that they were Jason Alexander. Of course I took none of it seriously, but it did have me laughing for a good hour or so. Everyone was spouting Seinfeld quotes pretty much.

 

[KatVonnegut]

Random Guy: When did you realize you can make guys do things by shaking your ass
Nice Reg: (jokingly) She doesn't make me do shit Random Guy
Random Guy: Why do Fan Boys feel the need to answer questions that aren't directed at them?

....because this is an interactive room where people are supposed to communicate with not only me, but the other members?
He later went on to insult the same reg and the rest of my room. How about a little swing of the ban hammer hmmm

 

[THE MOLLIE MARIE]

We're all familiar with mmmtards. Well, today, I had a dude who was doing that with h's. I say hi to him, he says hhhhhhhhhhhh. He asks where I'm from, I say Pluto, he says hhhhhhhhhhhh. Pretty much responded to everything I said with hhhhhhhhhhhh.

 

[Brewhammer]

View attachment 57004
I'm not saying your name, dude. Also, 99.9% chance this dude's as white as me. He was popping into a few model's rooms last night/this morning, saying "hi" with the hopes that we'd respond with "hi, (username)". Uh, no.

That's straight-up awful. But along the lines of what he's trying to do as far as getting someone to say his name... I've seen someone do it humorously. There is a member whose name is "ForFuckingMe," and when he tips models they say "Thank you ForFuckingMe." Watching them see his name for the first time and thanking him is kinda funny.

 

[Nordling]

That's straight-up awful. But along the lines of what he's trying to do as far as getting someone to say his name... I've seen someone do it humorously. There is a member whose name is "ForFuckingMe," and when he tips models they say "Thank you ForFuckingMe." Watching them see his name for the first time and thanking him is kinda funny.

Ha! Kind of like "Mike Hunt," which was featured in the movie "Porky's." Someone called a restaurant and asked them to page "Mike Hunt," so the waitress got on the PA and asked the room, "Has anyone seen Mike Hunt?"

 

[Nordling]

Guys seem to be obsessed with asking really dumb, rude questions:

Big_Papi02: are ur boobs real? either way they nice, just curious
Helper: Papi, everything about her is real.
Big_Papi02: they are so perfect they look fake which is why i asked lol
Helper: Uh... "they look fake" is NOT a complement.
(model agrees, NOT a complement)
Big_Papi02: umm girls pay a shit load of money to have boobs that are perky like that
Big_Papi02: it is a compliment idiot

Banned

 

[WickedTouch]

A model assessment by the denizens of lounge10k

 

[SaffronBurke]

Ha! Kind of like "Mike Hunt," which was featured in the movie "Porky's." Someone called a restaurant and asked them to page "Mike Hunt," so the waitress got on the PA and asked the room, "Has anyone seen Mike Hunt?"

My dad went to high school with a Mike Hunt, and every day someone would slip" Will Mike Hunt please come to the office" into the announcements, which were read by a rather attractive girl.

 

[BobbZero]

Reminds me of Bart Simpson's long running prank calls to Mo's Tavern.... the 18+ version.

 

[JimsX]

First time in a room and I tipped 10 with a hello. Got this pm a minute later.

prem: 10 IS A INSULT
me: why?
prem: NOT ENOUGH
me:

are you her boss? her boyfriend? lol
prem: MAYBE
me:

i have a great idea. i worry about me and you worry about you

prem: 0K
prem: BAP
me: BAP?
prem: YES
me: i have no idea what BAP means lol
prem: BROWNING AUTOMATIC PISTOL

 

[SaffronBurke]

From a dude who didn't have his cam on:

"Can you here me"

Yep, I'm a wizard and I can hear you by magic.

 

[TacoBelle]

From a dude who didn't have his cam on:

"Can you here me"

Yep, I'm a wizard and I can hear you by magic.

Actually, he asked if you could "here" him. Which would still require you to be a wizard to make him appear by your side. "Accio Idiot Member!"

 

[BettyDemure]

From a dude who didn't have his cam on:
"Can you here me"
Yep, I'm a wizard and I can hear you by magic.

You could have a listening device planted on him through his tinfoil hat, too

 

[Johndoe91]

From a dude who didn't have his cam on:

"Can you here me"

Yep, I'm a wizard and I can hear you by magic.

Was he by chance on cams?
Methinks I found him

 

[SaffronBurke]

Was he by chance on cams?
Methinks I found him

View attachment 57111

Nope, on streammate.

 

[WickedTouch]

About an hour into an OhMiBod show and a dude interrupts the long yellow wall with this pearl...

 

[BettyDemure]

A guy came into my room and said the following:

"okey, bb my handell down you help up for my hendell" (I told him I wasn't sure what he was saying), then he persisted "wow, beautifully, really, your boob beautifullyyour my handell down okey? my heat body. what is your age? I answered him with my age. Then he continued, "bb you my favorite. mesur your back. you heare clour beatifull and your chest size good and fast sexy. really. but your lips is my choice, tich my handell".

I totally get that English isn't a first or even second language for everyone, but I just didn't know what he was saying

 

[ComicOzzie]

CrueGuy: You are ugly but I like you a lot..... don't ban me

BANNED!

 

[JerryBoBerry]

"okey, bb my handell down you help up for my hendell"

My penis was flacid, but you're helping to make it hard. Let me freeload till I orgasm.

"wow, beautifully, really, your boob beautifullyyour my handell down okey? my heat body. what is your age?

Wow, you are beautiful, your boobs are also beautiful, many other compliments to butter you up here, and i want them sliding down my penis for free.

"bb you my favorite. mesur your back. you heare clour beatifull and your chest size good and fast sexy.

BB, you are my favorite model that I will never tip, let me see your back. Your hair color is beautiful and your breasts are a great size, let me see them quickly before you realize i have no tokens, you sexy woman you.

but your lips is my choice, tich my handell".

But I love your lips the best, touch my penis. What, you won't do what I ask after giving you all these fake compliments? Bitch token whore, fuck you. I hate you. I shall go spend my millions of tokens on the next model. Goodbye.



*Exact literal translation by JerryBoBerry. Your welcome.

 

[BettyDemure]

My penis was flacid, but you're helping to make it hard. Let me freeload till I orgasm.


Wow, you are beautiful, your boobs are also beautiful, many other compliments to butter you up here, and i want them sliding down my penis for free.


BB, you are my favorite model that I will never tip, let me see your back. Your hair color is beautiful and your breasts are a great size, let me see them quickly before you realize i have no tokens, you sexy woman you.


But I love your lips the best, touch my penis. What, you won't do what I ask after giving you all these fake compliments? Bitch token whore, fuck you. I hate you. I shall go spend my millions of tokens on the next model. Goodbye.



*Exact literal translation by JerryBoBerry. Your welcome.

Hahahahahaha I'm laughing so hard right now I have tears in my eyes. Thank you!

 

[Johndoe91]

Double whammy

 

[mav2199]

I continuing to see a guy ask some very nice girls on a scale from 1 to 10 how much do you need to pee? I'm getting a little tired of him....

 

[David_Lee_Loca]

View attachment 57004
I'm not saying your name, dude. Also, 99.9% chance this dude's as white as me. He was popping into a few model's rooms last night/this morning, saying "hi" with the hopes that we'd respond with "hi, (username)". Uh, no.

Same. I had some guy with the name 'nuckingfigger' log onto my SM and kept trying to get me to say his name during chat.
All people like that get from me is a friendly 'hi', and if they want raceplay, they can move along. I grew up in a multicultural family as was always taught from a very young age to never say hateful words like that. Even if it's play, I think it's wrong.