Should I Drop This Regular?

[Sashacurves]

I have a regular who has been a good consistent customer pretty much since I started this work back in May. He pays for 1-2hour long Skype sessions (often not including anything sexual at all) roughly fortnightly and in between, I chat to him almost daily (for free) on snapchat - it's like an unofficial girlfriend experience kind of deal.

However, he hasn't paid for a session since end of Jan so coming up to 2 months now. And the last session we had booked, he cancelled on me last minute. He still keeps talking to me daily and seems to expect the same back. I've been dropping hints like saying I'm really busy, thinking of stopping my socials because they're not a financially efficient way to spend my time (which is true) but he's still persisting.

I don't know how to tell him that he's taking the piss! He's (until now) my most reliable regular so I don't want to lose him but at this point I don't see any benefit keeping him around at all...should I just be really blunt? Block? What would you do?

 

[Sashacurves]

I also realised whilst writing this that maybe I've been letting him take the piss the whole time anyway. He pays a lot for our long sessions but so does everyone else, and no one else expects me to talk to them multiple times a day every day in between....

 

[thinkinboutit]

Only reply when you have time, and keep it cordial but brief. You don’t need to be getting into personal conversations or asking him open ended questions.
If he asks why you’re not responding, you can let him know that you’re very busy but you’d love to schedule a show to chat more.

He's figured out that he can have his needs fulfilled (your time and attention) without fulfilling yours (taking you to a show).

Have more thoughts but maybe more suitable for models-only.

Edit: I just saw "multiple times a day every day in between...." its clearly bothering you or you wouldn't be asking. You wouldn't let a friend treat you like that, so why let a former customer? its time to establish some boundaries. be prepared for backlash when you do. If he becomes abusive, drop him like a hot potato.

 

[Sashacurves]

Oops I thought this section was models only, I’ll re ask over there! Yeah I’ve let him get away with it because he’s been reliable income but now that he’s not it’s much harder to keep up the act!

 

[EmmaFox]

Camming is pay to play so if he hasn't payed you since January then it's definitely time to take a step back. Like mentioned above he's found out he can get what he wants with out paying and is now taking advantage of you.

 

[AudriTwo]

i'll answer here because this will help any newbie cambbs who haven't been verified yet.

if a member starts causing me emotional labor i stop engaging or block. if im not enjoying myself, it will negatively reflect on cam.

i don't do any private messaging anymore, but when i did i only did it when i was streaming, or up to an hour after i ended my stream. my mindset is if they want to instantly chat, they can take me to private where i can do so and get paid for it. on social media, i didn't allow pms. if they want to respond to a public post they can do so there, (which will would benefit me in the long run because it boosts interactions which will increase my reach)

if this is on onlyfans and not a camsite, same rules still apply. i agree on keeping it cordial and short. don't reply right away if they respond right away. it's okay to wait the next day to respond.

 

[thinkinboutit]

I also find it very helpful to compartmentalize & schedule workrelated tasks. EX: a certain time or day for checking emails, then Im done that activity until the next day.

Work -life balance matters and its unhealthy to give a stranger 24/7 emotional access to you.

 

[Sashacurves]

on social media, i didn't allow pms. if they want to respond to a public post they can do so there, (which will would benefit me in the long run because it boosts interactions which will increase my reach)

I also don't engage at all on social media, this is a guy who found me in my first couple of weeks on MFC and instantly took me over to Skype instead and we've since communicated by snapchat (which I use to let people know when I'm camming and sometimes do snap shows, or have a little chat every now and then with regulars). But he's the only person I've ever had who almost without fail messages every day, even now days where I have begun to leave him on read more often than not.

I used to allow it because though he never tips to message, he was reliable at doing long Skypes where I wouldn't need to put on a show most of the time, just chat so I felt it was worth it. I know the only reason he is (was) a paying customer is because he likes to think of it as a kind of bf/gf situation (though he IS fully aware it's not). So I've been tossing up whether to say something because I know I'll lose him as a customer altogether if I start charging for messages or not doing messaging anymore.

But you're all right, if it's stressing me out then the financial benefit isnt worth the emotional headache! Especially now as I'm actually getting quite wound up towards him, I'm not sure I even want further sessions, not that it looks like I'm getting any anyway!

Thanks guys, needed the reassurance that I'm not being unreasonable!

 

[Deleted member 45270]

A service doesn't stop being a service just because a customer is a regular. I don't think he sounds dependable as a customer at all. It sucks to lose someone who affects your income a lot - but this guy sounds like he's not even paying you!

You're not being unreasonable. Someone who's actually worth your time as a customer wouldn't want you to be stressing out about him, much less unpaid for all you've done for him.

 

[yummybrownfox]

I have a regular who has been a good consistent customer pretty much since I started this work back in May. He pays for 1-2hour long Skype sessions (often not including anything sexual at all) roughly fortnightly and in between, I chat to him almost daily (for free) on snapchat - it's like an unofficial girlfriend experience kind of deal.

However, he hasn't paid for a session since end of Jan so coming up to 2 months now. And the last session we had booked, he cancelled on me last minute. He still keeps talking to me daily and seems to expect the same back. I've been dropping hints like saying I'm really busy, thinking of stopping my socials because they're not a financially efficient way to spend my time (which is true) but he's still persisting.

I don't know how to tell him that he's taking the piss! He's (until now) my most reliable regular so I don't want to lose him but at this point I don't see any benefit keeping him around at all...should I just be really blunt? Block? What would you do?

Unless I'm getting mixed up with a different model's post, is this the same guy you told us about before that's been expecting too much of your attention? Or is this a different guy? He's acting like it's a "Buy 1 one month, get 2 months for FREE" deal, and that's so not cool. You can message him and tell him hi, and gently let him know the deal, reminding him that he hasn't paid for a session since the end of January, so the GFE stuff has actually expired a while ago. You seem really sweet, so a reasonable member shouldn't really get upset with you for gently letting him know the deal. If he does, well...hit the road, Jack!

The members on MyFreeCams and Stripchat who ask "You got Snapchat?"...I feel like, even if I did, they'd abuse the hell out of it. On Stripchat I tell people they can chat with me on Plasma Messenger (Only one guy has so far), and on MFC I'm gonna start telling them they can chat with me via OnlyFans private messages. I don't think I'm allowed to mention SextPanther on MFC or SC. Otherwise I'd totally advertise the fuck outta SP.

 

[Jay_Storm]

If you don't enjoy taking to this regular and he is no longer paying, put some distance between the two of you. He can talk to you online not on your personal time.

 

[rockin_rod]

As a viewer rather than a model, I won't presume to offer advice on dropping a customer.
But if I had behaved as he has, I would expect to have been ditched long ago.

 

[ti4ti]

I am regular in two CB rooms.

I stooped paying for nudity long time ago, but I regularly tip the models social media account tax, even if a One time subscription would be enough

And yes, I expect some friendly off line chat in return.

Both of them have clear time slots where they reply. So is part of the worktime indeed

If regular don’t expect 24/7 reaction, then all ok for both sides

 

[Deleted member 45270]

I regularly tip the models social media account tax

And yes, I expect some friendly off line chat in return.

Generally speaking, people tend to post free content on their social media, and I'm assuming that's what's happening here too. You tipping a social media "tax" is in thanks to that free content, right? Why do you expect an extra service on top of that?

Why not pay for a specific service instead, like sexting, or just simply tipping while talking to them instead to make the lines clearer?

 

[ArcticKitty]

Hi Ms. Sasha; I just wanted to say that you rock and this guy is just a jerk afaic.

I don't know if he's just clueless or a deliberate jerk but he's imposing on you and can't or won't take a polite hint so he is inconsiderate in any case.

And you are quite ethical and conscientious and it occurs to me that he may be playing on those qualities.

Anyway, however you decide to play it, I really hope it comes out to your satisfaction. *s*

 

[ti4ti]

Generally speaking, people tend to post free content on their social media, and I'm assuming that's what's happening here too. You tipping a social media "tax" is in thanks to that free content, right? Why do you expect an extra service on top of that?

Why not pay for a specific service instead, like sexting, or just simply tipping while talking to them instead to make the lines clearer?

Everyone can see the free content, tax payers get dm access

 

[Deleted member 45270]

tax payers get dm access

That sounds less like a tip/"tax" and more like payment in exchange for a service (dms), just like tipping someone for PM access on camsites.

 

[rockin_rod]

I am regular in two CB rooms.

I stooped paying for nudity long time ago

but still enjoying nudity, it seems?

 

[Gingerely]

if a member starts causing me emotional labor i stop engaging or block. if im not enjoying myself, it will negatively reflect on cam.

This is so true. Last January I met a customer who was a okay spender. I noticed he was creepy AF at first on cam but whatever, it's a job. Then he started to come everyday, everynight, and I was making some money, nothing too crazy, but it was helping.

Then a few weeks later he started to send me messages, very long texts of how much he loves me, how beautiful I am, sending me POWERPOINT presentations of my pictures in it and poems (he had no job, 50 years old, living with mom so he had a lot of time in his hands).

He was everyday asking so many personal questions. What state, city, college, etc... of course I lied it all. I'm not even in the US. He started calling me his girlfriend, showing my pictures to his family, creating fake accounts pretending it was their mom coming talk to me (lmao) - he was just CRAZY. and my mistake was not set boundaries and dealing with it because I wanted his money. He was a psycho and was stalking me all day everyday! He was angry because he could not find anything (of course I gave him a fake name and fake everything).

He stopped spending and he was also sending me messages angry because I got online and didn't warn him (?) He said I need to ask his permission before going online on a different schedule.

I just could not take it anymore - the bottom was when he joined my Free Chat and started to cuss at the members who were tipping me!! I banned him instantly and blocked from everything.

Really this disgusting psycho fucked me in the head a little bit. I was stressed and disgusted. This was 1 year ago and I still have a few nightmares that he is in my house or that i'm torturing him.

Lol this is a long text but all i can say is if he is annoying you just ban! trust me you will find other members MUCH better than him! You DO NOT need him! Ban for your mental health.

 

[AudriTwo]

Everyone can see the free content, tax payers get dm access

if you respect the time and effort she puts into streams you consume for your enjoyment, you should tip her. if you arent tipping into models rooms you regularly visit, you are not a regular of that room, but a freeloader. you paying "tax" for social media dms isn't going to help models in the long run. tipping in camrooms will help boost placement and will help influence other people to tip. this is why i would direct people to tip and purchase my content on my sites when i was on social media. so when a mr. needy expiration date expires and he is never seen or heard from again, the fruits of my labor have improved or maintained my placement.

i dont understand why tell us this as it doesn't really help op. if anything you sound like you are bragging for not tipping into shows and found a "loophole" that really selfishly benefits you. i hope the models doesnt burn themselves out dealing with your need for attention.

you could also tip for dm access and contribute towards or thanking them for shows you can freely watch. but i think we know why you don't.

 

[ti4ti]

if you respect the time and effort she puts into streams you consume for your enjoyment, you should tip her. if you arent tipping into models rooms you regularly visit, you are not a regular of that room, but a freeloader. you paying "tax" for social media dms isn't going to help models in the long run. tipping in camrooms will help boost placement and will help influence other people to tip. this is why i would direct people to tip and purchase my content on my sites when i was on social media. so when a mr. needy expiration date expires and he is never seen or heard from again, the fruits of my labor have improved or maintained my placement.

i dont understand why tell us this as it doesn't really help op. if anything you sound like you are bragging for not tipping into shows and found a "loophole" that really selfishly benefits you. i hope the models doesnt burn themselves out dealing with your need for attention.

you could also tip for dm access and contribute towards or thanking them for shows you can freely watch. but i think we know why you

I tip 300 tk per week in each room.
The tax is a tipping item. Helps hitting goals, motivate other tippers, improve rankings and all what you wrote.

Green in both rooms without interruption for 18 months. Far from being a free loader, believe me.

No cheep cheep cheep

 

[AudriTwo]

I tip 300 tk per week in each room.
The tax is a tipping item. Helps hitting goals, motivate other tippers, improve rankings and all what you wrote.

Green in both rooms without interruption for 18 months. Far from being a free loader, believe me.

No cheep cheep cheep

Once paying members can become freeloaders. Its the circle of life on camsites. You bragging that you no longer pay for nudity because its free makes you a freeloader.

300 tokens is $15 with cb model conversion.
So cheap cheap cheap.

 

[ti4ti]

Once paying members can become freeloaders. Its the circle of life on camsites. You bragging that you no longer pay for nudity because its free makes you a freeloader.

300 tokens is $15 with cb model conversion.
So cheap cheap cheap.

So it makes 5$ per hour I am there in public chat.

If each freeloader would have this rate my two favs would make 500$ per hour at least

Anyway, I am a happy freeloader.

 

[ArcticKitty]

!

 

[Sashacurves]

Unless I'm getting mixed up with a different model's post, is this the same guy you told us about before that's been expecting too much of your attention? Or is this a different guy? He's acting like it's a "Buy 1 one month, get 2 months for FREE" deal, and that's so not cool. You can message him and tell him hi, and gently let him know the deal, reminding him that he hasn't paid for a session since the end of January, so the GFE stuff has actually expired a while ago. You seem really sweet, so a reasonable member shouldn't really get upset with you for gently letting him know the deal. If he does, well...hit the road, Jack!

The members on MyFreeCams and Stripchat who ask "You got Snapchat?"...I feel like, even if I did, they'd abuse the hell out of it. On Stripchat I tell people they can chat with me on Plasma Messenger (Only one guy has so far), and on MFC I'm gonna start telling them they can chat with me via OnlyFans private messages. I don't think I'm allowed to mention SextPanther on MFC or SC. Otherwise I'd totally advertise the fuck outta SP.

No it wasn't me but I think ironically enough, I also commented on that model's post advising her to not let him take advantage and yet here I am finding myself in the same situation haha. I guess it's easier than I thought to lose perspective and objectivity when it's you! I'm glad I posted though cos everyone has unanimously reminded me I'm an idiot and let myself be taken for a ride. I told him straight and as expected, he took it well, backed off but don't think he'll be back. But better that than me be stressing about it!

I agree, my snapchat while I was at mfc was so full of freeloaders. I did have a fair few regulars from there who liked their skypes and stayed in contact through snap which was useful but so much timewasting spam as well. Now I'm only on SM I might even get rid of snap altogether. What's plasma is that a paid one like SP? I wouldn't be able to get the traffic tbh because of SM's strictness so think I'll stick to OF for now because that's the easy one for them to find on their own!

 

[Sashacurves]

sending me POWERPOINT presentations of my pictures in it and poems

I still have a few nightmares that he is in my house or that i'm torturing him.

At first I was thinking kinda funny but by the end of your post omg, that's absolutely terrifying!

you will find other members MUCH better than him! You DO NOT need him! Ban for your mental health.

Totally agree with you I was putting up with unacceptable behaviour from the beginning really wanting his money, then found myself putting up with it for nothing and needed this reality check!

 

[yummybrownfox]

No it wasn't me but I think ironically enough, I also commented on that model's post advising her to not let him take advantage and yet here I am finding myself in the same situation haha. I guess it's easier than I thought to lose perspective and objectivity when it's you! I'm glad I posted though cos everyone has unanimously reminded me I'm an idiot and let myself be taken for a ride. I told him straight and as expected, he took it well, backed off but don't think he'll be back. But better that than me be stressing about it!

I agree, my snapchat while I was at mfc was so full of freeloaders. I did have a fair few regulars from there who liked their skypes and stayed in contact through snap which was useful but so much timewasting spam as well. Now I'm only on SM I might even get rid of snap altogether. What's plasma is that a paid one like SP? I wouldn't be able to get the traffic tbh because of SM's strictness so think I'll stick to OF for now because that's the easy one for them to find on their own!

Aw, I don't think anyone here thinks you're an idiot.

Yeah, Plasma is paid like SextPanther.

 

[AudriTwo]

So it makes 5$ per hour I am there in public chat.

If each freeloader would have this rate my two favs would make 500$ per hour at least

Anyway, I am a happy freeloader.

 

[Onfirebigman]

Vaya, pensé que esta sección era solo para modelos, ¡volveré a preguntar allí! Sí, lo he dejado salirse con la suya porque ha sido un ingreso confiable, pero ahora que no lo es, ¡es mucho más difícil seguir actuando!

Good afternoon! Personally, I am totally blunt with people who show obsessive traits, in addition to the fact that they can be dangerous the more ground one gives, they bother me a lot... There are those who call me fussy and there are others who call me paranoid... but I prefer not to be besieged by these types of people, they just make me very uncomfortable

 

[ericlafayet]

In my case, I don't go there for sex, but to have fun meeting, speaking adn wahtever. I started on those pages just few months ago, so I'm just discovering this world, and discovering Myself on how I feel everything, my reactions and what I do like and what not.

I feel I'm in the border line betwen just meeting girls and letting things happen, and feeling we're creating a friendship.

SAid that, I have few girls on IG, but from the first moment, I never thought to speak to them all the time there. I just react to a story if I see I can do it,and letting them to be the one to write me.

It deosn't matter how I'm willing to go for a friendship with a model, the reality is that whatever is the relationship we have, is because of the job. So i have to respect her, to control myself to not be toxic getting confused, and keep doing everyhthing on the page (your fun time is her job, she needs it).

So I see it's okay to have contact out of the page, if you know you're not going to get profit against her job, and that you'll always respect her time and her space.

And as said before, I'm just discovering everthing, learning from errors, and trying to do thins better, for me and for them.

My 2 cents.