camming doesnt bring joy anymore

[meowlina54]

I been camming for 3 years and it's gotten to the point where I hate going online. Used to be so fun, I had so many cool people hanging out in my room and I always had a great time no matter how many tokens I earned. Last 1.5 years been just stressfull and going on cam just makes me depressed. Now I just sit there in chat with nobody talking in my room, if somebody does talk most of the time it's just some weird nonsense bullshit or demands. Even some of my regurals turned weird and annoying, I kinda want to ban them, but they been hanging out with me for so long.. I tried switching camsites, I tried taking a break, I tried doing different shows, different camming times, but nothing seems to help. Seems like I only get annoying trolls or guys who want everything for few tokens. I do earn more then I used to back then but just being on cam became so depressing. Sitting in a room with 200+ people and just begging for somebody to say hi. Please don't advice me to leave camming, it's not a thing I can do at the moment. Camming used to be the only thing that made me happy but now it just sucks.

 

[AudriTwo]

i'm sorry you are having a hard time. sounds like you are burned out and it is affecting your mental health. that is no good, and i worry about that. are you speaking to anyone like a therapist or councilor? if not, please do. it maybe something else that is making you burned out on camming that you need to deal with or whatever else. if you are afraid to talk to someone because the stigma around sexwork, lgbt friendly therapists are usually open to sexwork and won't judge you for your job.

www.ratracerebellion.com
i know this is not what you want to hear but there are other work at home jobs, not as lucrative as camming can be, but if you get to that point where you need to quit, you have options. even if it's just doing some part time work while you cam, it may help take the stress and burden that camming is giving you.

i am so sorry you are dealing with this. a lot of us have gotten to that point where we get burned out. this job is fucking hard and it can be emotionally taxxing for sure. please take care of yourself. know you aren't alone, and you will be okay.

 

[LaceyRoyce]

Hey boo - check out pineapple support. They offer free therapy with sex work friendly therapists and might be able to help you cope with some of this. I also super reccomend a book called "thriving in sex work" by lola davina to help you work through some of your feelings and your options

It sounds like you're completely burnt out, which is really common in this industry. Some things you could consider might be

-If you can't quit now but you want to, could you figure out an 'exit plan' to where you could start working on something that would allow you to quit at a date in the future. This could be something like training for a new job. Starting a side business that will take time to build. etc. It could also mean lowering your living expenses to where you don't need to cam so much - I moved states to do this this year.

-Can you consider a 'sideways shift' that is something more than just trying another cam site. Phonesex, escorting, content, porn. I'd suggest looking at clip making as an alternative since a lot of what it sounds like you're burnt out on are things that are to do with interactions with regulars.

-Can you adjust things so that you are feeling less upset. You mentioned wanting to ban regulars beacuse they bring your mood down. This may be something you need to do- regardless of how long they have been with you.


Burn out sucks, and it really really sucks when you don't have a lot of other options or pathways to explore. I'm really sorry you're experiencing this and I hope you will be able to find a way to thrive again.

 

[Peekabooh]

When your regs go weird, ask one of them if you might have changed.

 

[AudriTwo]

When your regs go weird, ask one of them if you might have changed.

what? she isn't responsible for how people act. i'm sorry i'm confused, could you explain more?

 

[SMuser69]

Even some of my regurals turned weird and annoying, I kinda want to ban them, but they been hanging out with me for so long

Be mindful when you're under stress not to be self-destructive or burning bridges for no real reason, it will just toss you further down a hole. If members are really being toxic sure but I've seen models lash out at members then seem shocked when they don't put up with it and leave. Don't make your members targets of your depression. Replacing a good member because you had a bad day can add even more uncertainty to your situation.

 

[Mila_]

Try to break down the source of your negative emotions into smaller units. Pinpoint what is it that you dread exactly and be as specific as you can. Then address each problem as specifically as you can.

One of the specific things you say bother you is having a silent chatroom, so instead of thinking "camming makes me unhappy" think "a silent room makes me unhappy" and then figure out a way to get them to talk to you.

 

[Deleted member 37064]

what? she isn't responsible for how people act. i'm sorry i'm confused, could you explain more?

My first thought when I read their response was that something might have changed in her show, which caused people to leave or members to behave differently.

For example, two models who I used to be regulars in their rooms changed in different ways:

Model A went from a talkative, energetic model, with a little bit of cosplay to some really out there things which I didn't exactly care for. I cut the time I would visit her room down to days which were more inline with what I liked. She kind of got lippy with me about not being around as much, and her attitude changed for the worse. At which point, I refuse to interact with her anymore. While I didn't care for it, it seems a little more positive for her in terms of tips and people in her room.

Model B used to have a highly seductive room. Beautiful dances, a little bit of singing, some joking around and interaction with the members, etc. all made for a great environment. She decided to go with the little pink alien, and it's turned into a show of a fish flopping around on the floor with a slight bit of seduction when people aren't tipping. Another situation where she didn't care for my not visiting as much anymore, and her personality changed. Less people in her room on average now (300+ then, 20-30 now). But, again, the tips seem to be more due to her reactions.


A thought regarding the OP's situation, is that with her feeling burn out, may reflect upon her show and could be why members have changed in how they act as well. Certain actions/feelings typically will attract similar. This has been discussed many times in different threads in how models may inadvertantly be causing a negative impact upon people and not realizing it. (I feel like I could word this better?)

I have a model friend who is going through similar emotions right now. The number of people in her room has slowly dropped over the years I've been in her room. She's commented to me that she's wanting to change and do something else as she's burnt out from camming and tired of the BS from many members (I've seen her snap and make a couple of comments to some members who really pissed her off). The past few months, she's been doing her best to save as much as she can while doing things to prepare for making an exit. It'll still be a while before she stops camming, as she's looking into taking some classes and other goals to make the jump.

I wish the OP, and anyone else who's feeling burnt out, all the best. Whether they stick with it, and find a way to reverse their current situation. Or, they take a leap and find something that gives them some joy in a new line of work.

 

[Peekabooh]

what? she isn't responsible for how people act. i'm sorry i'm confused, could you explain more?

When you communicate often with someone and it's fun and positive at first, but changes to annoying and negative later, i think it's normal to ask why. Regardless of what relation you have.

When a business client changes behaviour it's quit normal to ask why. A client with a complaint will not always tell himself he has a complaint.

A fun and vibrant room changing to a silent and trouble some room, has reasons. Reasons i dont think are one sided. Better to ask direct than to speculate.

 

[LaceyRoyce]

When you communicate often with someone and it's fun and positive at first, but changes to annoying and negative later, i think it's normal to ask why. Regardless of what relation you have.

When a business client changes behaviour it's quit normal to ask why. A client with a complaint will not always tell himself he has a complaint.

A fun and vibrant room changing to a silent and trouble some room, has reasons. Reasons i dont think are one sided. Better to ask direct than to speculate.

Her members might be changing because her attitude or room has changed as a symptom of the burn out she is experiencing. Handling the burn out will handle the rest but the only way to do that may be to cut and run.

 

[Sevrin]

I don't know you or anything. You may need a vacation. Camming can be isolating, and if you're naturally introverted, that can make it worse. Perhaps you just need more RL interaction with people to help keep you grounded. I'm kind of older (see sig) and I've done therapy and I've talked with friends. You tend to see a more positive long-term effect from friends more quickly than from spending time with therapists. If that's an option, I'd try that route, unless you have shitty friends, which can happen.

There's been lots of good advice already. But sometimes it's you and no one's gonna take the blame for how you feel, so you have to deal with it. Whatever you do, make some kind of change.

Good luck to you. Hugs.

 

[Peekabooh]

Op was explicit about quitting...