When life gives you lemons

[Violet Dawn]

I tried to find a post for this, but I couldn't really find a proper phrase to put. I typed in "When life goes to shit," but couldn't find quite what I was looking for.

If anyone is comfortable with sharing stories like this I want to hear about the times in your life that you faced the most struggles and what you did to overcome them.

About a week ago I found out my brand new computer started snapping at the hinge. The hinge is made in such a stupid way that it's impossible for me to fix, so I have to send it off to get repaired. So my boyfriend gets off work usually when the post office is closed, so we only have specific days we can mail anything... and the day before we planned to send off the package(which was Monday)... well I'll start from the beginning of the day. I caught my cat eating some of my ribbon and immediately called my boyfriend to come home. We took her to the vet and they said if it doesn't pass she could have to undergo a 2-3 thousand dollar surgery. For a 1 dollar roll of ribbon. Really makes you rethink your purchases, huh?

Well, then later I found out I had a piece of pop corn kernal jammed into my wisdom tooth opening. We tried getting it out and established we probably need to go to the dentist, and if it has to be extracted by surgery it could cost another 2k or so. Which is insane. Right as we are about to go to bed that night we hear banging on our door and a man yelling from the top of his lungs while more banging on other peoples' doors. We have been having problems with this couple ALWAYS fighting at about 2 in the morning for the past few weeks and my boyfriend was going to go out there and knock some boots.

Come to find out our apartment was on fire. After some screaming and running I found my cats and we ran outside and watched the flames while getting the shit clawed out of us by our cats. My cat, I guess, is so fat that he actually threw out my arm, and it's still kinda weak. We waited with our fatties for about an hour to figure out what happened. And they informed us that it was a car that was set on fire purposely and two cars ended up destroyed, another was extremely melted, but can technically still run and wonderfully enough my boyfriends was melted on the side. He got lucky, because it's only a few damages, but the damages are enough for him to not be able to drive his car legally. (Windows, tail lights, etc) His insurance won't cover the damages unless the arsonist is caught.

The arsonist is a suspected sociopath that has been arguing with our neighbor for the past few weeks. They actually got into a fight that night. Shocker, right?? Well he also took all the fire extinguishers from the apartment and has previously threatened to come and shoot up the WHOLE apartment. Even the innocent people living here. So I feel like this guy tried to kill us all. It makes me very uneasy. So my boyfriends damages are another about 2k. We really want to move, but that would be more expenses and we have no idea what we are going to do at this point. Most of this hit us in one day. Where we live we don't really have a good transit system so going to the grocery store is near impossible(we are running low) and to top it all off my boyfriend emptied out the last of the cat litter that day so my cats are pooping and peeing everywhere. ;-;

Is it too soon to look back on this and laugh???

But anyway, I want to know your stories and how you dealt with them.

 

[Violet Dawn]

I probably should have posted my own as a reply.

 

[TacoBelle]

I don't have any experiences that can compare with that all in one day (mine were pretty much spaced out within the same few months), but I'm sending you all of the ehugs that I can. You guys can and will get through this. Just take time for yourself and cry it out. Trust me, it'll help. Maybe talking it over with a really trusted friend or family member will help. Receiving an actual hug is good soul medicine.

As for your cat, it's probably nothing to worry about. More than likely, she only ate a small amount (like one inch long piece or less), and it will more than likely pass. If the vet thought it was a super serious issue, he/she would have pushed you to do emergency surgery right then. Just wait it out, and watch kitty for any major symptoms. If she stops drinking/eating for long periods of time, if her eyes glaze over, or if she starts panting/drooling excessively, take her to the vet. But otherwise, she'll probably be ok.

As for your computer: I'm not sure who you're sending it to to have it repaired, but you can schedule a package pickup with USPS and FedEx as long as your postage is already paid. So that might be an option to help with things.

As for your car: I know it's illegal to drive with a shattered windshield, but if it's just a side window (sounds like it is), he can drive without one. If the tail light cover is broken, but the light still works, he can put red tape over it. If the light doesn't work, have him first check to see if the bulb is broken/pushed out of socket. Those are just a couple of bucks. If it still doesn't work, the wiring might have melted. You will need to take it in to a mechanic to have it replaced, which could easily get pretty costly. But the only LEGAL thing you have to do is have a working tail light that illuminates red (hence the red tape).

You'll get through this, Luna! Just hug your kitties and your boyfriend, and work as much as you possibly can to save up for more incidents like these! Sorry that I only gave advice and hugs without stories like you wanted, so I'll write mine in another post.

 

[TacoBelle]

My worst time in life was when I was working two jobs while pregnant, had a miscarriage and emergency surgery, and my husband still kept cheating on me and eventually left me for his friend's girlfriend. During those same months, I got my first puppy, fell in love with him and 30 days later, he died from Parvo (even though he was supposed to be UTD on all of his shots).

I tried to get over it all by myself, but that was almost impossible. I ended up attempting suicide, but my sister rescued me. Luckily, my family was completely supportive during this time, and they were always a phone call or short drive away, regardless of the time. My friends stayed over, keeping me occupied, helping take my mind off of things, and I almost always had someone watching me. When no one else could get me to talk about it, my Dad would come over and just hug me. He would tell me that we didn't have to talk, and he'd just wrap his arms around me. I bawled like a baby. It's the small things like that that just really help. Eventually, time passed and life went on. It took me nearly 6 years to pay off my surgery (yay for payment plans!), but little by little, things got better. And they will for you, too. *hug*

 

[Violet Dawn]

Thank you though. Great advice. So far my cat seems really normal, haven't seen her poop out the ribbon yet though. Things are getting better slowly.

 

[Pure_emotion]

Hey Luna

I have a lot of periods in my life like this as single mom. Always some really big crap happens and I cant see any way out of it . It goes from bad to worst and I cant do anything about it. I try to keep a positive mind though and in time I learned to appreciate little things in life such as a nice sunset or a sunny day at the beach with my child and the dog or a chocolate cake even lol. We all have bad days or bad weeks but that is how life is. Life is too short to be negative. When something really bad happens to you take it as a challenge. As long as we live here on Earth there is always a solution to every problem. Only death is permanent lol.
Big hug for you

 

[moosemeat15]

The worst was my first 28 yrs of life, being sexual, physically,mentally and spiritual abused.
All this was done as a child to preteen as a teen I started drugs and booze and just drink myself half to death. frigging orgies and bashes all the time, could't sleep and make it to school. I had to teach myself how to read and write and do my own homework without help from my parents but I dropped out.
My mother and father pushed most of the beatings to me, they always said I ruined their life. I t wasn't until I was 28 I found out I had a different father and all this shit made sense who turned out was my neighbor the whole time.
But with that said I am sober and clean getting healthy no booze or drugs, life is good, things do get better.
I have my own house, and all the materials u put in it just fucking dandy now I luv it
Things are better

 

[SamanthaGrant]

I realize this thread is a little old but I'm really sorry you went through all of that in such a short period of time. Nobody should have to go through things like that but unfortunately life doesn't play fair. If there's anything in life I have learned this.

I can't say I have been through anything similar to your situation. And even those who have aren't going to completely understand because each of us handle different stressors in different ways.

I can say I have been through some tough life lessons in the past that have included abusive relationships, losing family members, being in a relationship with an addict, having a significant other arrested and in jail, sexual assault, and even some more minor things like car accidents, and daily life stressors.

Like I mentioned above I just simply cannot relate in the aspect of what you personally have gone though. Though I am very sorry you had to go through those things. I can let you know some ways I dealt with my own life stresses in the past but I can't promise they'll work for everyone.

One of the things I've done that really helped me push through hard times was actually journaling. Most of my bad experiences in the past have directly related to people in my life that I couldn't show my emotions to. Not in a healthy way at least. Journaling gave me a really big outlet to just let go and let all my anger or frustrations I had on paper.

Another thing I found that helped distract me was my dancing. Back when all these bigger events happened I was enrolled in dance classes and they could take my mind off the world around me. Id imagine exercising would be a good outlet as well since dance classes can become quite pricey; and hence why I don't do it anymore

Other than those just trying to surround yourself with positivity can help a lot. I know it sounds crazy to find some shred of light in a horrible situation but positivity can be pretty contagious even in cruddy situations. Surround yourself with people you love and love you. Watch a movie you love and splurge on a treat you really like. Go visit someone who you've missed and know it'll cheer you up some. Take up a hobbie that takes your mind off those things for a while.

Sometimes stress can also cloud our judgment quite a bit. Ive found when I take a step back and focus on something else I can often think of solutions or different routes to take. Not to mention it also helps in general with feeling better about a bummer day.

Overall whatever you do to get through These challenges you will be stronger from them in the end. Keep pushing through and fighting, and you'll come out a stronger person. Even though I've gone through a lot of bad situations I now see them as good life lessons. I learned a lot from them and I wouldn't change my past for that reason.

Hugs for you,
hope life is starting to look up