What kind of important things do you think....

[uncoveredmanhole]

Is it too creepy to put cameras in your child's bedroom? Obviously if they were a full blown teenager.

what does 'full blown teenager' mean?

I had my first orgasm around the age of 7-9* ... if the fact that teens masturbate is the reason why it's 'obviously' creepy, then you may have to adjust your benchmark.

*can only ballpark the age by which house I lived in

 

[justjoinedtopost]

This video is the kind of learning material used in therapy groups for little kids (little little, age 2-5) who've been sexually abused. It's an age-appropriate way to understand what has happened and to teach kids how to handle it if it happens again. Trying to explain sexual assault to a kid that young isn't going to be very effective, they're not really going to understand what you're trying to say, but show them a video like this, and they get it. Once they get older, you can explain more about it as they're able to understand more.

Exactly. Like my child doesn't need to know WHY someone wants to see inside their underwear, or what they might do. They just need to know to not let it happen and how to stop it. They can know all the details when they get older and learn more about the world in general.

I kind of get the feeling this was bothering you (or at least at the forefront of you mind) when you started this thread?

Spoiler

I didn't mean to suggest it was a good idea to educate them by sharing graphic details about sexual assault with them at that age. When I mentioned survivors groups, I was trying to point out that running away and saying no might not be enough. Important, yes.

Say no, run away, tell somebody...and if you don't get away, or you get tricked into it, don't believe any lies about what will happen if you tell.

With that in mind, that line in the song "they cover up his private parts, and that's what makes him strong..." really hit a nerve. I was reacting to that, would have been better to deal with what caused the emotion than attacking the animation quality and calling it silly garbage.
One might hear "Be strong, keep your pants up"
Another might hear "You were weak"

Oh, yeah, if you are on a date, and think there is a chance you might be pregnant...

 

[uncoveredmanhole]

Oh, yeah, if you are on a date, and think there is a chance you might be pregnant...

oh hell yea. seconding that with a variation...

until I commit to a vasectomy it's really important to me that I don't fuck anyone who doesn't believe in abortion / prefer having one to ruining their life. If someone thinks a one-night-stand baby might very well be a fortuitous thing that improves their life, good for them, but I sure as hell don't want that guilt on my conscience. no sex is good enough to be worth that.

 

[Violet Dawn]

I kind of get the feeling this was bothering you (or at least at the forefront of you mind) when you started this thread?

Spoiler

I didn't mean to suggest it was a good idea to educate them by sharing graphic details about sexual assault with them at that age. When I mentioned survivors groups, I was trying to point out that running away and saying no might not be enough. Important, yes.

Say no, run away, tell somebody...and if you don't get away, or you get tricked into it, don't believe any lies about what will happen if you tell.

With that in mind, that line in the song "they cover up his private parts, and that's what makes him strong..." really hit a nerve. I was reacting to that, would have been better to deal with what caused the emotion than attacking the animation quality and calling it silly garbage.
One might hear "Be strong, keep your pants up"
Another might hear "You were weak"

Oh, yeah, if you are on a date, and think there is a chance you might be pregnant...

My whole post was talking about little kids. It wasn't an implication I would never teach them anything else. It was more of a "hey you could do this!"

But actually I made this thread thinking more about STDs. I just thought I'd weigh in on one of my personal things.

 

[Violet Dawn]

what does 'full blown teenager' mean?

I had my first orgasm around the age of 7-9* ... if the fact that teens masturbate is the reason why it's 'obviously' creepy, then you may have to adjust your benchmark.

*can only ballpark the age by which house I lived in

 

[Fatquack]

Huh. Well, apparently I'm an over-sharer (and possibly a bitch). I primarily use(d) online dating apps so before I even went on a first date I want to know:

If they have kids. I hate kids. Hate. Haaaaate them. If you have kids younger than teens you are wasting your time dating me. It won't work out unless you pretty much never ever see them and only send child support payments. But then I just have to wonder if you're secretly kind of an asshole because you never see your kids and what that backstory is like.

STD status. Listen, if I date you I'm going to want to fuck your brains out, likely on our first meeting. If you don't have recent test results you're able to share with me I'm like to not want to even meet you in person. If you've got an incurable STD I'd want to know that too. It's not stopped me from dating people with them, it just gives me a heads up as to extra safety precautions we/I need to take.

Religious status. Again, if you're religious we probably aren't going to get along because I say things like, "I don't believe in magical sky-wizards."

Your diet. Are you vegan/vegetarian/omnivore? I have no problem with people picking the best diet for their own reasons—you do you—but if you're going to refuse to kiss me until I brush my teeth after I've eaten a ham sandwich...we should just be friends.

Telling people what I do is a very hard decision. If we don't work out and the other person is a deranged asshole then I've just opened myself up for some malicious shit. On the other hand, I don't want to date anyone who has a problem with my work. I try to work it in prior to them knowing any problematic information, like real last name or facebook account.

The way I see dating is like this: there are 7.5 BILLION people on this planet. Why try to make things work with someone with vastly different ideals than you? Get that shit out there and find people who actually match up well with you. (Though this might also be why I spent the majority of the time single while living in a small town in the midwest.)

No kids: check
STD status: clean: check
Religious status: atheist: check
Diet, I love meat: check
Job: no problem for me: check

Hmmm, now if we were only on the same continent...

 

[Violet Dawn]

You asked me a question and I answered it, I don't understand the facepalm. @uncoveredmanhole

 

[uncoveredmanhole]

You asked me a question and I answered it, I don't understand the facepalm. @uncoveredmanhole

you said "Obviously if they were a full blown teenager [it would be creepy]".

and apparently you thought I needed to know the definition of teenager, rather than of your qualification of a particular kind of teenager (hebe- and ephebo-philia draw a line in there, maybe you were trying to say something to that effect, I couldn't begin to guess, so I asked....but apparently _all_ teenagers are 'full blown' teenagers, so I kinda shrug at what exactly your point was with that reply).

and since you didn't explain in either of your posts why it would be creepy, it's still not clear whether it would only be obviously creepy concerning 'full blown' (aka all) teenagers, or whether it should be obvious that it's creepy for even more full blown people than just them

things move along more quickly when you just say what you mean.

 

[Influenced]

You asked me a question and I answered it, I don't understand the facepalm. @uncoveredmanhole

He prolly thought you were being a smartass haha. I personally thought it was hilarious.

Edit: Yep I was right--"and apparently you thought I needed to know the definition of teenager"

 

[Violet Dawn]

you said "Obviously if they were a full blown teenager [it would be creepy]".

and apparently you thought I needed to know the definition of teenager, rather than of your qualification of a particular kind of teenager (hebe- and ephebo-philia draw a line in there, maybe you were trying to say something to that effect, I couldn't begin to guess, so I asked....but apparently _all_ teenagers are 'full blown' teenagers, so I kinda shrug at what exactly your point was with that reply).

and since you didn't explain in either of your posts why it would be creepy, it's still not clear whether it would only be obviously creepy concerning 'full blown' (aka all) teenagers, or whether it should be obvious that it's creepy for even more full blown people than just them

things move along more quickly when you just say what you mean.

You're taking what I originally said and trying wayy too hard to over-analyze it. I was tired. Some people have different ideas of what is an acceptable age for privacy. Stop trying to make something that isn't there.

@Influenced Yeah, I don't know what else to say rather than ... like what it is. Lol.

 

[uncoveredmanhole]

You're taking what I originally said and trying wayy too hard to over-analyze it. I was tired. Some people have different ideas of what is an acceptable age for privacy. Stop trying to make something that isn't there.

I'm really just saying 'what exactly was your point, because if it was this, then you might wanna broaden that a little'. I don't know why that seems like such an effort to you. the only effort has been patiently explaining it to you.

 

[Nikola Tesla]

It is an expression. relax

 

[Nikola Tesla]

• 
  Take a chill pill x 1

exactly what i said.

 

[Violet Dawn]

I'm really just saying 'what exactly was your point, because if it was this, then you might wanna broaden that a little'. I don't know why that seems like such an effort to you. the only effort has been patiently explaining it to you.

Why should I have to explain to you in depth what a teenager is? You went to school, I'm sure.

If you compared a 12 year old to a teenager, I would understand your reasoning for questioning a lot more. But you compared an 8/9 year old, because they masturbate. Any living being with sexual organs that can be stimulated will masturbate to some extent. It's a fact of life. I'm not putting a camera in there to watch them masturbate, I'm putting a camera in there because they're too small to defend themselves and I want to make sure they are safe. And I feel like teenagers are at a point where they deserve to have SOME privacy.

 

[RogueWarrior]

What kind of important things do you think should be first date confessions?

Like kids? Stalkers? Anything else important?

I personally wouldn't tell someone I had kids until date number 3.

Since you mentioned kids twice, I'm guessing that's a thing with you. I don't know how old you are, nor will I ask, but at my age, it's almost assumed that there are kids in the picture. Not only is that 1st date confession, it's pre-date confession and sometimes a topic of conversation. What night can you get a babysitter? Lunch only for now?

And further down in the thread, in my opinion, kids should not meet the gf/bf until waaay down the line. No need in parading in mommy/daddy's new fling every time. It would have to be pretty serious for my kids to meet another woman. They have enough to deal with.

But yeah, if you don't disclose kids on the first date, if not before, done. Because I may or may not have even gone on the first date had I known.

 

[Violet Dawn]

Since you mentioned kids twice, I'm guessing that's a thing with you. I don't know how old you are, nor will I ask, but at my age, it's almost assumed that there are kids in the picture. Not only is that 1st date confession, it's pre-date confession and sometimes a topic of conversation. What night can you get a babysitter? Lunch only for now?

And further down in the thread, in my opinion, kids should not meet the gf/bf until waaay down the line. No need in parading in mommy/daddy's new fling every time. It would have to be pretty serious for my kids to meet another woman. They have enough to deal with.

But yeah, if you don't disclose kids on the first date, if not before, done. Because I may or may not have even gone on the first date had I known.

No, that was just a random example. I started the thread because of a tv show where an std was involved.

 

[RogueWarrior]

Cool. I could only go by what I read.

 

[justjoinedtopost]

I don't know how old you are, nor will I ask, but at my age, it's almost assumed...

Good idea, let's get back to the present day reality before this 'first orgasm' stuff goes any further.

Ok, first date, what do I need to know...hmm...
Any of your grandkids hooked on meth, and how far away do they live? If there is a chance stuff is going to start turning up missing, I got some things I need to lock up.

 

[uncoveredmanhole]

Why should I have to explain to you in depth what a teenager is?

if you're still missing the point, I give up on you.

 

[AudriTwo]

lol what are you guys talking about *clicks show ignored content*

 

[CharlieCharma]

It's not really something that needs to be said on the first date, but I absolutely love when guys talk shit on their exes first date. Shows me to run far far away.

 

[fandango]

For sure I wouldn't expect to meet someone's kids after a fist date but I'd like to know if you have any. It's not going to affect whether or not I want to date her but it's a pretty big part of your life to leave out.

lol what are you guys talking about *clicks show ignored content*

This is the only reason I never ignore anyone. I tried it but there are some posters who spout so much rubbish but post so often that threads stopped making sense and it was less annoying to read their garbage.