Were you ever bullied when you were in college?

[Guy]

This is a subject that really isnt talked about much compared to bullying in high school. Many people assume by that point youre mature enough to not engage in that kind of behavior. Ive never been to college, so I havent seen for myself how much of a problem it actually is.

 

[Zoomer]

Nope, because mainly by that age people weren't so insecure as to feel the need to bully others. You didn't need to "fit in" (if by college you mean university), it was a wonderfully diverse place where everyone was welcomed and embraced as humans, rather than ostracised for individual quirks.

Many were also exploring their own personalities, and were therefore far more willing to engage with said diversity to find out who they really wanted to be.

 

[Nikola Tesla]

No. But I was bullied as an adult by somebody named Tom Edison.

 

[SMuser69]

This is a subject that really isnt talked about much compared to bullying in high school. Many people assume by that point youre mature enough to not engage in that kind of behavior. Ive never been to college, so I havent seen for myself how much of a problem it actually is.

You might meet some asshole people but college is a situation where you have far more control about your schedule,social and location which reduces what fosters a full 'bully' relationship. High School bullies partly produced by the high school environment. Schedules are usually fixed so the bully has the advantage of encountering you in the same place at the same time with the same support people around them also if we're talking public school, the advantage of knowing people and locations for years.

College in most situations you've picked where you are going to school. Most people don't know anyone before the first few days. You're not locked into being in the same location with the same people everyday. Also you're usually more emotionally mature in college, you have better ability to rationalize a situation.

College the major problem is general peer pressure and usually because of the absence of guardians for the first time in most people's lives, making regrettable choices and having to deal with the consequences yourself.

 

[SaffronBurke]

I went to community college, and nope it was actually the first time in my life that I was in an academic setting where I WASN'T bullied.

 

[Bocefish]

Other than the occasional sophomoric sorority or athletic team hazing... most everyone is there to learn. BTW, kudos on the way you started the thread.

 

[AudriTwo]

I was bullied throughout my adolescence. College, not at all. It was easy to avoid everyone you didn't get along with, and you are able to find more like minded folks. I joined clubs and attended events that interested me.

 

[unanonymous]

It's how you take it that determines what happens next. If you're an easy target that gets triggered easily, you'll probably get bullied more. People have killed themselves over jokes that others shrug off with a laugh.

There's so many more people around you in college, and they all have so many more other things to worry about, that no one has the time for that concentrated bullying you get with teens who spend whole days together for years. There were a few outcast, socially awkward guys and weird girls around, but the worst they ever got was snide remarks behind their backs. People will gossip no matter what their age.

 

[Violet Dawn]

I personally think if someone has the mental capacity to bully someone else they won't last long in college. Bullying takes time, effort and a specific mental state, all that do not work well with how demanding college is.

 

[Vera]

I interned/lived offsite through my undergrad, so I never really had any interest in college culture. I don't think bullies are a huge thing outside Greek life because so many are just trying to do their own thing.

 

[MDouble00]

Personally, after middle school I never really had to deal with anyone trying to bully me. In my personal experience in College I was in a few academic clubs, Student Government and a Fraternity. There were definitely cliques in all of the groups, but there wasn't anything that would reach a level that I felt I or people I was closer to were being bullied.

Did my Fraternity haze, yes... but I don't think I or we my pledge class or any of the pledges that came after me where specifically targeted just to be bullied. Did we have pledges that got shit for not learning things, or not doing things they were told sure. Did we have to as a group get shit because one of us messed up yeah that happened.

I think the closest I ever really saw bullying in college was during Freshman year and there was one guy on our floor that just didn't mesh with anyone. But, I don't recall any regular taunting or such aimed at him. I'm sure there might have been some jokes in passing during the dining hall hours and surely a late night prank here and there. But tormenting etc, I would say no.

 

[Lelo1]

When I was young, I thought people 'grow up'. But as I've gotten older, I've realize that many adults act like they did in high school, or even grade school. It's like people can get stuck. Being an adult has been more about being able to self parent, finding healthy coping, and putting away childish things.

Some people grow out of it, Life gives people a chance to learn, And they choose to change. or they don't change and get stuck in a loop.

 

[JickyJuly]

I was repeatedly physically attacked by a group of girls who lived in my dorms when I went to college. They thought I was dating a man one of them liked. He was black. I am not. We were not dating. We were barely acquaintances. I'm scrappy but outnumbered. They only stopped once I'd called the police and made 4 reports. 1 more report would have had the main girl removed from school. I should have started making police reports the first time I was jumped, but the RA told me she'd handle it and please not to. Super fun having a communal bathroom with these folks too.

 

[SaffronBurke]

When I was young, I thought people 'grow up'. But as I've gotten older, I've realize that many adults act like they did in high school, or even grade school. It's like people can get stuck. Being an adult has been more about being able to self parent, finding healthy coping, and putting away childish things.

Some people grow out of it, Life gives people a chance to learn, And they choose to change. or they don't change and get stuck in a loop.

I've worked with 50-year-old women who are more catty than anyone I went to high school with, it's obnoxious.

 

[CharlieCharma]

Not at all. I did have a professor call me out in front of the class for being a stripper. He came into the club the week before and asked loudly if he saw me there. I don't think he meant it with malice, and it kind of worked out in my favor. I half assed everything in that class and still got out of it with a B. He also sent me an incredibly long email apologizing.

 

[CurvyJ]

I was only bullied as a child and teen, never at college

 

[MDouble00]

Not at all. I did have a professor call me out in front of the class for being a stripper. He came into the club the week before and asked loudly if he saw me there. I don't think he meant it with malice, and it kind of worked out in my favor. I half assed everything in that class and still got out of it with a B. He also sent me an incredibly long email apologizing.

I'm guessing he never got a lap dance if he only gave you a B lol

Jokes aside even if it was in fun he should have made the comment in private.

 

[CharlieCharma]

I'm guessing he never got a lap dance if he only gave you a B lol

Jokes aside even if it was in fun he should have made the comment in private.

He made that clear in his email. If I still had my school email, I'd post the screenshot because it was cringey. He really fucked up. I worked my ass off in his class until that moment and after that kind of just slacked off and stopped showing up as much. It was pretty embarrassing since I was in the closet as a sex worker at that point. I didn't even show up for the final or turn in the final essay assignment. It was politics. I was taking it only so I could take economics. Such an awkward situation. I really think he truly regretted his words. He looked like he had wished he kept his mouth shut right after he said it.

Of course I was sitting in the front row(because I am blind and can't see from anything past that)and just turned completely red and stfu. He would joke around in the beginning of class and throw around playful banter. I had just had my sugar daddy buy me a car at this point in my life and was telling the person next to me how I got a new car(not that I had someone buy it for me, just that I was happy that I wasn't driving around the death mobile I had before that). He chimed in with the strip club talk and how now he saw how I could afford a new car or some shit like that. It was years ago, but holy shit. Was not a fun experience.

 

[JGenius]

I was bullied in Junior High School not in High School.
I was bullied at my first student job while in college. And i was bullied in college by a girl but I think she probably have some personality disorder.
First time she told me that she had a very high sense of humor and that should take on me when i was targeted by her sense of humor.
When i stopped hanging out with her and our mutual friend group she started to reproached it to me. After I came back with the group she started to ignore me and told our friend group to not invite me because i was never bringing alcohol in party (fake news). At the end of year i was sitting next to a friend she was behind me and she started to yell at me to not sit next to her even if it was evident it wasn't my purpose she was smiling while she was yelling. A few week later she called me oversensitive told me she was joking.
On the following year she played the poor me because i didn't want to talk with her anymore. I made a mistake to forgive and forget, silent treatment during three months. I blocked her everywhere to not let her contact me again next time she'd hoovering.
At a moment after a party we're alone and i confronted her about her behavior. She started to shout accusing me to always need her telling me about how awful she felt when i blocked her everywhere in social media and phone. She blame me because i have told her i didn't want to talk with her at the beginning of scholar year.
She called me "dark, evil..."
A few week later we started to behave on a neutral way but actually it's weird sometimes she ignores me deeply and sometimes she comes to me and i'm cold with her even if i try to hide it.
Thanks god in September (when year starts again) we only have 5 months left.
And after we'll all be graduated.

 

[Deleted member 37064]

My family moved around a lot when I was younger. I was never bullied until my parents moved us to the city where I graduated high school from. I started there in 4th grade, and the bullying and teasing came right away. When I got into Junior High(Middle School), it got so bad that I dreaded almost every day of school because I knew it was coming. I got into a few fights in 7th & 8th grade. But, nothing changed. It wasn't until halfway through 8th grade that things changed.
By this point, I was being shoved around in class, pushed in halls, etc. One day in gym class, lights went out and I got jumped by a couple of guys. They scatter, lights go back on. Few minutes later, lights go out again, and someone runs hard into me. I swing wildly, connect with their face, and the person goes down to the floor. Lights come on, and it's one of my friends. Said he got shoved from behind and pushed into me. Felt so bad..
The next day, I'm walking down the hall, and being picked on severely buy a kid and his cronies. I'm crying, trying to get to class, and they weren't stopping. I finally snapped, turn around and blindly punch the kid right behind me. I felt my hand go into his face, and as I turn to run, I hear him crumple to the ground. I take off and run max speed to the other end of the school to my next class. No one followed me, which is surprising, since I thought I was going to be pummeled.
Next day, I hear the leader was "looking for me". So, I'm hiding, trying get to classes without being seen. He sees me walking in front of him, calls out for me and asks to stop. I was clenched up, ready to fight if I had to. I turn and get a look at him. Black eye, broken nose, and a knot on the side of his head. All from when I punched him the day before. Guess his head bounced hard off the concrete floor when he crumpled to the ground.
He wound up apologizing, and saying he's done. I told him I accepted his apology. But, I refused to give one because he got what he deserved. Said he was fine with it. Interacted with him a few times during the rest of the school year. But, I never got picked on by him, or anyone else through high school.

Never went to college, as I went to a vocational tech which was career specific training. We all did some friendly bantering with one another. But, never anything malicious and we all made sure everyone was okay.

 

[Wade W Wilson]

You don't see much bullying in college (with the exception of athletic team and fraternity or sorority hazing of course) because for the most part, the high school bully type isn't really the type that goes to college. Well, that is unless mommy and daddy are rich and have expectations.

 

[Guy]

Not at all. I did have a professor call me out in front of the class for being a stripper. He came into the club the week before and asked loudly if he saw me there. I don't think he meant it with malice, and it kind of worked out in my favor. I half assed everything in that class and still got out of it with a B. He also sent me an incredibly long email apologizing.

How many years were you a stripper for?

 

[CrashPad]

How many years were you a stripper for?

That is what you took away from her story?

 

[Violet Dawn]

That is what you took away from her story?

Guys very outspoken and to the point.

Edit: His point.

 

[eyeteach]

Yeah it happened once. This dude that didn't really know me I guess thought he could gain bro points from the morons he hung around with. He smarted off to me in the cafeteria and I wasn't in the mood to take his bullshit so I stood up for myself and basically told him if he felt froggy then damnit jump. Then the bastard made the biggest mistake of his life up til that point: he hit me. Oh HELL no! I grabbed him around his throat with one hand and beat his sorry ass down with my free hand. Then next thing I know campus rent-a-cops are pulling me off him and are starting to escort us the college lock up when a guy I had one class with stepped in and told them I was defending myself, the asshole hit me first, and if they took me off and made a report they'd have to take him, too. Sometimes it helps to have an All-American defensive tackle watching your six.

Long story short, I heard from the dean of students who let me know that the asshole would be suspended pending a hearing, that I'd been cleared, and please don't fight in the cafeteria again; I did my best not to disappoint our Dean of students.