The Age-Play Debate Thread

[VeronicaChaos]

Since people keep bringing it up everywhere, touching on aspects of it, and now apparently everyone's debating it on twitter? I thought I'd go ahead and start this thread so we can actually talk about it without character limitations, derailing other threads, or using it as a battle-ground to talk shit on models we don't like...and maybe we could do it in a civilized manner, pretty please? It's a touchy subject and I'd really like us all to be adults here. I thought about starting this in Model's Only but I'm interested in the members perspective as well. I learned from the last time I tried discussing this that maybe some things need trigger warnings, but since this thread is about it, proceed with caution if you're easily offended. I'm not really a fan of trigger warnings, but here it is for those who are!

I do have a personal perspective, since this is a kink I'm involved with IRL. I guess part of me was getting frustrated seeing age-play misunderstood so much and I wanted to defend it. Please, feel free to disagree with me.

In my experience, age-play is not about attracting pedophiles, or encouraging pedophilic behaviour. Part of the fun is having a grown adult experience age regression, as well as the taboo fantasy of taking forbidden fruit. Age regression is extremely interesting; it brings out a side that may be forgotten, and encourages child-like wonder and innocence. My voice gets higher when I experience it. I, in a way, feel more like myself, since I've been a giant kid since forever anyway. Adding sex to age regression can be exciting because of the power play involved, the taboo nature of the fantasy, and in a practical way it just allows you to act in a way you normally wouldn't be expected to act in a sexual encounter. But at the end of the day, the person who is the adult in the fantasy is not experiencing actually having sex with a child. The experience of having sex with someone who's regressed is pretty specific and probably can't be compared to any other experience. It's its own thing. An adult acting like a kid is so dissimilar to me to actually being a kid. I never actually feel like a kid. I feel like an adult that has matured to the point of being able to let loose my inner child without fear. When I was younger I never had the confidence to indulge in this sort of thing, so in a way I give kudos to those who are younger and doing it. To me, it's on par with rape fantasies, tentacle hentai, and a plethora of other fetishes and fantasies that would be absolutely devastating if they were to occur for realsies.

I'd also like to touch on the Daddy thing as well, since they so often go together, and it's also a part of my IRL sexuality. It's not about someone actually being your father, it's more about a nurturing relationship in which someone is guiding you, teaching you, and taking care of you. Of course, the taboo nature of adding sex to that dynamic is what fuels a lot of the fantasy, like in age-play. But at it's core it's about feeling protected and safe with someone who has authority over you (that you gave them). It's comparable to the more popular D/s relationships, but with an emphasis on nurture, comfort, protectiveness, and guidance. The men who play Daddy properly, not the actual sick incestuous pedophiles that there unfortunately are, want to care for their (adult) little girls, NOT completely fuck with someone who is actually underage or related to them. They're complete opposites.

Things are always different in the porn world, very much the same way that some internet "Doms" are just giant assholes looking for an excuse to be a dick. But I don't think providing this sort of material is any more harmful than any other sort of fantasy porn that should always remain a fantasy. And there is always the controversial thought with any fantasy media that allowing people to let out these fantasies in a consensual safe manner will keep it from happening IRL as often. I don't think it's much different from the good ol' violent videogames debacle.

Hope I explained myself well, and I'd like to hear your thoughts!

 

[Lexi Emerson]

Thanks Veronica for posting this. I think it is great that there is a place for everyone to discuss this.

I don't want to say too much about the drama but I do want to say that I think that a lot of the people involved, on both sides, need to step back and get a better understanding of things.

Like Veronica, I am also into the ageplay scene as well as the DDLG (Daddy Dom, little girl) community (they're different things to me). It is something I do not often talk about just because a lot of people do not understand it and do not want to understand it. But I think this is a good time to shed some light on the topic for the camming community with everything that is happening.

Ageplay is so much different than being attracted to children/minors. Rarely people who are into ageplay/DDLG scene into pedophilia. I know for a fact that while my boyfriend participates with me in my fetish/lifestyle, it disgusts him to think about anything with a real child. It is more of a roleplay for most people. I take on the role of a naive, innocent, child-like character who is into childish things (keep in mind, for some this stuff isn't purely sexual all the time and for some not at all) while my boyfriend takes on the dom role who is more in charge and nurturing of me.

I have a lot more to say on the topic but first I want to see where this thread goes. So here are a couple okay article about the subject. I have some other ones saved somewhere that I will find and post later!

http://www.yesandyes.org/2011/04/true-s ... eplay.html

https://www.princeton.edu/~achaney/tmve ... eplay.html

 

[fawkesy]

I think age-play is nothing anyone should be ashamed of. It's unfortunate that there are many ignorant people that believe if someone is into it that they'd do it in real life. Personally it's not one of my talents, I'm more dominant, but I have seen some videos of women that REALLY can play it off so well, being a minor but are OBVIOUSLY women. Some are just so shut off of their own sexuality they feel the need to shame others for being so open with theirs. These relationships take trust so it makes sense why some don't understand.

 

[FoxyBea]

I try to not have an opinion (or at least not express it) on age play that I see from other models or even my friends. My only issue is that it gets slippery. For instance, a grown woman playing around with age regression is different from the guys on MFC who deliberately sought me out because I am 18 and they were actually my dad's age or older. They actually sought me for the power imbalance so they could take advantage of me, or pretend to. That isn't the same as a woman (or man) playing a character for his/her partner in his/her adult body with his/her adult mind. I also think a lot of people fail to understand that age play can be independent and does not have to involve another party, which knocks out the secret pedophile argument because it ignores the person playing the age regressed. If a model happens to be young or have a body that members perceive as childlike (or as close as possible for an adult, I suppose), she is allowed to encourage talk of this, but she is also allowed to feel totally creeped out about it and shut it down.

I don't think this kink being possibly slippery is an effective argument against it, though, because all kinks get that way. I don't think anyone should be anti age play unless they're just straight up kink critical. I'm personally kink critical, but that just means I seek to understand why kinks exist and how our society fuels them; it isn't my personal agenda to burst into people's bedrooms and make them stop their kinky play.

I would like to say, though, if I'm even commenting on the right drama: that room has had members actually joking about "having sex with" (AKA raping) 12-year-old girls. So if we're all on the same page here the argument may not even be over age play. If we're not on the same page, just ignore this. :lol:

 

[Bocefish]

The whole Daddy thing turns me off in a big way as a concept in general... play or not.. it just gives me the creepy heebie jeebies.

:twocents-02cents:

 

[Deleted member 8603]

I have lots to say on this subject on both ends, but thats all extra and my opinion basically comes down to the same as any fetish.
What happens between consenting adults in their bedroom is awesome, send me pics.

 

[VeronicaChaos]

The whole Daddy thing turns me off in a big way as a concept in general... play or not.. it just gives me the creepy heebie jeebies.

:twocents-02cents:

I'd prefer not to turn this into a "does this turn you on?" sort of thread. Any fetish is going to turn some people off, I created this thread to move past that. I'm more curious as to whether people think it falls under "safe, sane, consensual" play.

 

[ACFFAN69]

I admit I'm completely ignorant of the "drama"/"debate" occurring on twitter, but your belief pretty much mirrors my thoughts on the issue as well. I'm surprised anyone would have an issue with two consenting adults fulfilling an age play fantasy in the privacy of their own home. It's fantasy, no one is getting hurt!

I can understand how the issue does get very muddled when it comes to selling age play pornography though. One interesting fact is, as we all are aware age play and rape pornography are a very common fetish category in Japanese pornography. Studies show that Japan has by far the lowest reported incidents of rape in the world. Granted there are of course many variables as to why that could be (perhaps it is a culture where women are less likely to report being raped for example).

I'm very interested in hearing the other side of the debate, I hope this doesn't become a circle jerk where everyone agrees that it is okay.

 

[fawkesy]

The whole Daddy thing turns me off in a big way as a concept in general... play or not.. it just gives me the creepy heebie jeebies.

:twocents-02cents:

Your avatar gives me the heebee jeebees

 

[Bocefish]

I'm more curious as to whether people think it falls under "safe, sane, consensual" play.

Safe, sane, or consensual?

:lol:

Behavior between two consenting adults in their bedroom is one thing.

Apparently, you don't want people's opinions...

Sounds to me like you are you looking for validation instead of opinions.

 

[Lexi Emerson]

I'm more curious as to whether people think it falls under "safe, sane, consensual" play.

Safe, sane, or consensual?

:lol:

Behavior between two consenting adults in their bedroom is one thing.

Apparently, you don't want people's opinions...

Sounds to me like you are you looking for validation instead of opinions.

I don't think that is the case at all. I don't think anyone is coming to this thread for validation. I personally am curious as to what everyone's opinions are (even if they are different than mine) about it. And maybe if they have a differing opinion explain to them from my point of view why I think it is okay. I don't think anyone cares if it gets you personally off or not. :twocents-02cents:

 

[FoxyBea]

I also think in a situation involving an adult woman, that woman's agency should come before the debate. Because even if someone is on some savior path about the kink, what are they accomplishing by totally robbing someone, especially a woman, of their agency?

 

[weirdbr]

I admit I'm completely ignorant of the "drama"/"debate" occurring on twitter, but your belief pretty much mirrors my thoughts on the issue as well. I'm surprised anyone would have an issue with two consenting adults fulfilling an age play fantasy in the privacy of their own home. It's fantasy, no one is getting hurt!

Well, Twitter is being Twitter.... I've seen people (models included) suggesting that anyone involved with age play should be banned, are pedophiles and, in one extreme case, that they should be gathered and killed, regardless of the fact that the people they are talking about are adults engaging in consensual acts and would never actually involve a child... It seems the model that suggested that harsh punishment probably believes that thought crimes are equivalent to real crimes (a la Minority Report)..

And for my opinion - hell, as long as it's between consenting adults and no harm is being done to anyone involved, go nuts and have fun.

 

[JessieWolfe]

I'm a super dominant with men, and I wouldn't be able to age play they way most people do it. But if anyone wanted to act young and naive during a JOI session, and I taught them how to stroke themselves the first time I'd totally be up for it. Or if I got to ageplay with another girl I would probably enjoy that a lot. Just haven't had the opportunity to experiment.

I get a little weirded out when people come into my chat room and start calling themselves daddy, especially since on my profile I am very clear about being a dominant girl. I find it kinda naive to believe that every girl would be into the daddy play and guys think it is ok to come in and say things like "daddy likes that". Freaks me out a bit, since I dont participate in that roleplay.

I definitely think that consent is necessary (duh haha). People coming in my chat and just assuming I'm ok with this are usually banned for being pushy and weirding me out by thinking this is ok behavior with a random girl. This doesn't mean I don't respect age play between two adults, it just means I think there should be consent. (You would be surprised how many guys just start calling themselves daddy on streamate.)

 

[VeronicaChaos]

the guys on MFC who deliberately sought me out because I am 18 and they were actually my dad's age or older. They actually sought me for the power imbalance so they could take advantage of me, or pretend to. That isn't the same as a woman (or man) playing a character for his/her partner in his/her adult body with his/her adult mind.

I agree completely! I started stripping at 20 and there is definitely a subset of men who specifically target the youngest girls in the club who are most likely to be naive, new, passive, etc. I am very glad I have moved beyond this! It is completely different than roleplaying the power imbalance or age-play, though the two aren't mutually exclusive.

 

[ACFFAN69]

I think age-play is nothing anyone should be ashamed of. It's unfortunate that there are many ignorant people that believe if someone is into it that they'd do it in real life. Personally it's not one of my talents, I'm more dominant, but I have seen some videos of women that REALLY can play it off so well, being a minor but are OBVIOUSLY women. Some are just so shut off of their own sexuality they feel the need to shame others for being so open with theirs. These relationships take trust so it makes sense why some don't understand.

You bring up a good point mentioning it isn't one of your talents because you are more of a dom. I imagine this discussion is going to be centered mostly around DDLG (daddy dom, little girl as mentioned earlier), but age play (or Paraphilic infantilism if discussing further childlike regression) isn't strictly that. Men can have a fetish for regressing just as easily as women can, generally if they are looking for a dominant female.

For those morally repulsed by age play, is it equally as repulsive for a dominant female and a submissively regressed male? Or is it different? I'm genuinely curious.
How about a male cam model selling a pornographic video of himself doing age play?

 

[AmberCutie]

Boce, though you deleted your post I would still like to include my reply:

Seems it's one of those days you've had too much to drink and are not speaking coherently. Please step away from this thread so the others can have a conversation about a topic (that doesn't interest you anyway) without side-tracking interruptions.

Thank you.

 

[Rose]

I'm sort of on two sides of this I guess. One of my absolute highest paying fetishes on Clips4sale involves age play, but not me pretending to be under age. Coming from that aspect, the only way I'm ok with participating in that side of the fetish is if it's made clear that all parties are of age and it's strictly role play. The things I do in my fetish videos there would absolutely never carry over to my personal life and have no translation whatsoever, but I'm totally ok providing that fetish to grown consenting adults.

On the other side, I've played the little multiple times in my personal life. It's not even so much about pretending to be a different age as to being 'naive' and inexperienced, letting my partner guide me and be teacher.

So long as everyone is of age, knows what they're doing, it's consenting and safe, then so be it. Fuck like bunnies. :handgestures-salute: :twocents-02cents:

 

[Red7227]

I try to not have an opinion (or at least not express it) on age play that I see from other models or even my friends. My only issue is that it gets slippery. For instance, a grown woman playing around with age regression is different from the guys on MFC who deliberately sought me out because I am 18 and they were actually my dad's age or older. They actually sought me for the power imbalance so they could take advantage of me, or pretend to. That isn't the same as a woman (or man) playing a character for his/her partner in his/her adult body with his/her adult mind. I also think a lot of people fail to understand that age play can be independent and does not have to involve another party, which knocks out the secret pedophile argument because it ignores the person playing the age regressed. If a model happens to be young or have a body that members perceive as childlike (or as close as possible for an adult, I suppose), she is allowed to encourage talk of this, but she is also allowed to feel totally creeped out about it and shut it down.

I don't think this kink being possibly slippery is an effective argument against it, though, because all kinks get that way. I don't think anyone should be anti age play unless they're just straight up kink critical. I'm personally kink critical, but that just means I seek to understand why kinks exist and how our society fuels them; it isn't my personal agenda to burst into people's bedrooms and make them stop their kinky play.

I would like to say, though, if I'm even commenting on the right drama: that room has had members actually joking about "having sex with" (AKA raping) 12-year-old girls. So if we're all on the same page here the argument may not even be over age play. If we're not on the same page, just ignore this. :lol:

It all comes down to some people believing that the fetish enables Pedophiles. There was a case in Canada where the judge stated that there was no difference between photographic and animated child porn because it enabled pedophiles. Personally I have no interest in either, but what consenting adults get up to with each other or their animated child porn in private is none of my business.

http://www.therecord.com/news-story/259 ... hild-porn/

 

[Autumn_LoL]

But if anyone wanted to act young and naive during a JOI session, and I taught them how to stroke themselves the first time I'd totally be up for it.

I want to do a C4S video series of this. It sounds super fun / hot.

But then, I like inexperienced, nerdy men.

 

[Bocefish]

Boce, though you deleted your post I would still like to include my reply:

Seems it's one of those days you've had too much to drink and are not speaking coherently. Please step away from this thread so the others can have a conversation about a topic (that doesn't interest you anyway) without side-tracking interruptions.

Thank you.

Thank you for being you and all you do

The mere thought of adults with minors sexually... raises my hackles in a bad way.

Stepping away nonetheless...

 

[Lexi Emerson]

Boce, though you deleted your post I would still like to include my reply:

Seems it's one of those days you've had too much to drink and are not speaking coherently. Please step away from this thread so the others can have a conversation about a topic (that doesn't interest you anyway) without side-tracking interruptions.

Thank you.

Thank you for being you and all you do

The mere thought of adults with minors sexually... raises my hackles in a bad way.

But it isn't with a minor... It is two consenting adults. :?

 

[JickyJuly]

In camming, I feel that age play and rape play are irresponsible. Numbering these to make responses easier.
1. You don't know the person on the other side of the screen. There's no way to know what their mindset and situation are. Even if a million things have to stack up perfectly for someone to think it's okay to hurt a child, I don't want to be one of those million things.

2. It's outlined as an offense on both MFC and Streamate. I want the site I work with to respect me. So, I will try to respect their rules.

3. It normalizes age play for the site. If it causes more members to feeling comfortable going around asking any old girl for non-consent roleplay, many a girl will be triggered. It might also be a trigger or a boner killer for members.

4. It could confuse new viewers into thinking the site allows minors.

HOWEVER...
I do think calling a girl out via Twitter for pedobaiting is completely off the mark. If she's doing something illegal, report her. If she's not, shut it. I'd be curious to know if those attacking her have ever worn school girl outfits or cheerleader uniforms, eaten candy suggestively, had gear from Hello Kitty or Barbie visible on camera etc. because all of those things are, essentially, dabbling a toe into age play as well. Additionally, the role of a woman and the role of a child used to be as possessions. Women being seen as complete adults is still something that's being carved out. So, some things that are childlike are also seen as feminine. Add the fact that our culture worships youth and things do get a little complicated.

 

[JickyJuly]

Boce, though you deleted your post I would still like to include my reply:

Seems it's one of those days you've had too much to drink and are not speaking coherently. Please step away from this thread so the others can have a conversation about a topic (that doesn't interest you anyway) without side-tracking interruptions.

Thank you.

Thank you for being you and all you do

The mere thought of adults with minors sexually... raises my hackles in a bad way.

But it isn't with a minor... It is two consenting adults. :?

Since Boce has been asked to shh, I'll step in here and clarify that he said "the thought". In this particular roleplay the thought of a child with a grown person exists. The imagining has raised his hackles? I don't know what hackles are, but the thought of a child with a grown person doesn't do anything nice in my imagination either. Surely, if you are saying this turns me on and it's okay, you can still understand that it will turn some people off?

 

[Lexi Emerson]

Boce, though you deleted your post I would still like to include my reply:

Seems it's one of those days you've had too much to drink and are not speaking coherently. Please step away from this thread so the others can have a conversation about a topic (that doesn't interest you anyway) without side-tracking interruptions.

Thank you.

Thank you for being you and all you do

The mere thought of adults with minors sexually... raises my hackles in a bad way.

But it isn't with a minor... It is two consenting adults. :?

Since Boce has been asked to shh, I'll step in here and clarify that he said "the thought". In this particular roleplay the thought of a child with a grown person exists. The imagining has raised his hackles? I don't know what hackles are, but the thought of a child with a grown person doesn't do anything nice in my imagination either. Surely, if you are saying this turns me on and it's okay, you can still understand that it will turn some people off?

I do understand that it would turn some people off and I never implied I did not understand that. The way he worded it, at least to me, came off to me like he thinks what we are doing is condoning sex with real minors or something. All I stated was it was two consenting adults.
Not that I felt he needed to be okay with it because I am.

 

[Worship Jaclyn]

I am technically into age play. It is by far my biggest fantasy. It is something I have acted out online a few times, thought about while masturbating frequently and acted out with another person in real life never. I feel a lot of guilt and self-loathing over having this kink. For me, I like that I'm supposed to be young and innocent but am actually seducing someone that I shouldn't like my teacher or Daddy. I don't call it age play in my head, it's more like sexual experience level play.

I also love watching porn where the girl is supposed to be an inexperienced teen and she is getting taken advantage of or talked into something by several older men. Would I actually think it was okay for a situation like that to happen? Absolutely not. Nothing about it would turn me on and I would stand by it being considered an actual crime. But I am 26 years old and I am old enough to tell the difference between fantasy and reality. What I fantasize about is my business If I choose to bring that into the content I make or my live cam shows is also my business. I believe that people should be allowed to have a safe place to experiment with their kink of choice.

There are a few cam girls I have muted on twitter because their particular kink makes me uncomfortable and that's okay too. It isn't okay to attack other people over their sexuality though and I find it a little pathetic that that needs to be said.

It honestly makes me a little uneasy that there are people who think sex crimes have anything to do with sex. I don't think that they do. They have to do with violence and control. They don't have anything to do with being turned on by the victim, they have to do with not seeing the victim as a living, breathing human being worthy of any kind of respect. So being a predator really has nothing to do with kink in my book.

I am picky about the porn I watch of this variety because I think that like everything else, it helps to act these things out with a bit of taste. I'm not sure what this twitter debate is and I am not going to look for it but there is a certain camgirl who pretends to be younger than she is and what I have seen of it I didn't like. What I saw, she was laughing and joking about actual crimes and child rape. That is not okay. I really, really don't like people, especially people in our situation, joking about serious issues like this. I think it's disgusting. To me, every time you make a joke about something serious you are picking away at how serious the world as a whole takes it. You are numbing people to it, you are numbing yourself to it and I think that's sad.

 

[VeronicaChaos]

Next up: The "Can I Joke About This?" Debate thread! :lol:

I personally think nothing is off-limits to joke about, but it's good to keep in mind when doing so that some people may be offended. If you can live with that, carry on. :handgestures-salute: But I have personally suffered a lot of trauma and I've found making tasteless jokes about it helps me get through it. I joke about rape because I have been raped and I feel the right to recover and heal in any way I want to/can. I think people assume that when people joke about something they think it's OK but I don't think that's always a great assumption to make. I think it's OK to joke about rape but deplorable to rape someone.

I guess my stance is that any discussion/entertainment/media about something bad is OK, just don't go and do it.

Sorry to threadjack! Other than that I agree with you.

 

[VeronicaChaos]

Also, gosh, I would love to get a member's perspective who's into this.

 

[Jupiter551]

I find it creepy as fuck, but so long as no one's hurt, everyone consents, etc etc - go wild.

 

[JickyJuly]

Also, gosh, I would love to get a member's perspective who's into this.

Secondary question, do you (those of you who are into this fetish) consider age play the same fantasy for both parties? Non-consent fantasy is usually a way for the partner who is playing the victim to feel free. This often appeals to women because they don't have to feel guilty or worry about being slut shamed. What is the fantasy for the other partner?