Smart or Dumb?

[Vixxen81]

I think all of the cammers here are pretty smart people. Do you ever think that hinders your income?

 

[Lilly_____]

I think all of the cammers here are pretty smart people. Do you ever think that hinders your income?

That's such a good question. I used to play dumb a lot more because a lot of guys seem to like that, and because I look young I think it was part of the innocent girl combo.

But the last year or so I decided to "come out" as a reasonably educated girl and had very positive results. Members like to engage in conversations about things we like in common and that also means I can attract smarter clients - who are often better tippers.

 

[MarieElise]

Yes, some of the clients and the things they ask drive me insane sometimes, and I can't hide it. If I were stupid it wouldn't bother me, and I could maintain a nicey nice face, instead of making looks like this at whole the room I swear sometimes people say shit so stupid, I have to mentally will my eyes to narrow down haha. Involuntary reaction. If I were stupid I could go along w stuff easier, and argue w people less. Which would likely be more profitable... but... I do think stupid people probably die sooner though. So glass half full.

 

[AmberCutie]

I think the fact that I’m so incredibly jaded to the ins and outs of camming is more to my financial detriment. I guess being smart goes with that overall, but if I could be more “business smart” and less jaded I’d probably run less people off and be more comfortable cowtowing to some of the lesser requests and inane attitudes of newcomers finding my room or DMing me on OF.

My pride and whatever-ness probably drives man of those types off, I just don’t have the patience to deal with most, and I am no longer willing to bend my comfort/boundaries just to make a few more bucks. (I feel very fortunate that I’ve been successful enough in my 13 years of this work to afford not having to bend.)

 

[Vixxen81]

I have had all of the thoughts mentioned before many, many times. It hurts my soul to be seen as unintelligent, uniformed, or worse -- gullible. I sometimes have to really, really check myself before I slay someone with my words because they said something stupid about the female body or how our mind work or what our intentions may be while we cam. The one that got me last night and what prompted me to post this thread (sorry I just now returned to it) was, "must be really cold in your house or you're smuggling tic-tacs." Obvisously, referring to my hard nipples. I had to stop myself from launching into an entire spiel about how female nipples work. I just smiled and paid attention to someone else for a moment.

I've asked myself if I'm too jaded to keep doing this. Too aware of the scam that is about to tumble out of some guy's fingers, and I'm like naw. They're new to the game and think that because I run the room differently I must be a total idiot compared to the rest of the girls and I saw them coming, that's all. Experience.

Sometimes it's worth playing dumb for the right reasons -- location questions, questions about the last time I got laid, things like that. "Oh baby, five minutes ago, you totally missed the show" then roll my eyes.

I think intelligence is attractive to the right people. However, it never fails that as soon as you're deemed as capable of caring for yourself outside of the world of camming, the tips are less in amount and frequency. We've proven to not be totally helpless and reliant solely on our bodies and their exploitation of our services. The "OMG I HAVE TO SAVE HER FROM HERSELF" is the most annoying trope in camming, but also really profitable.

 

[Vixxen81]

It's just so hard to pretend I've never heard their lame ass one liner before or that it's not extremely rude to waltz into a room and say things like, "oh it's so quiet," or "you look good for your age," or "you're too young to like this kind music," before they look at the age in the bio. Or the "OMG you're so beautiful!" Can we all just tip and fulfill tips and keep all the convo out of it for a while? I'd rather do physical gymnastics than mental gymnastics.

I'm trying not to buy into the game. Sometimes it's just downright trolling, sometimes it's just thoughtless banter. I thought coming to this forum would clear up some things for me but I didn't expect the way they would be cleared up, ugh that probably makes no sense. It's always going to be us against them and them against us except for the handful of people who really understand what both sides are.

I read a tweet from a model today that she spent a ton of money to go to AVN. After the first night she was scared to go back down to the floor because guys kept groping her or asking for her room number. I've never been to a convention but I hope that the broadcasters are all housed on a floor only accessible with an elevator key. Gah, sorry this is turning into kind of an off-subject but on-subject rant.

It's just me questioning if leaning into the nonsense and the bullshit and the lies is better because I am not financially okay? I live broadcast to broadcast. I had to borrow $200 to pay my mortgage this month. And of course no one can really make that decision but me but getting it out and on "paper" is better than bottling it up.

My 10 year camiversary is coming up this March and I don't think anyone cares, it's almost like "well shouldn't you be retired already?" *dramatic sigh* I also know that I'm PMsing like mad for the next few days and everything is always doomsday and pitfalls during this time. Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk!

 

[Finchomatic]

Part of getting older and wiser I guess.
Sanity vs $$$. Sanity should always prevail.

 

[Vixxen81]

Part of getting older and wiser I guess.
Sanity vs $$$. Sanity should always prevail.

Only people with money get to tout that. At this point I have $20K in house repairs I have to pull off and hit goal maybe 7 days out of 30/31. I took 6 days off for the entirety of 2022. I think there are a lot of models in my position, and you have to ask yourself at what point do your principles get tossed to get those tokens?

 

[Ozzie_]

Part of getting older and wiser I guess.
Sanity vs $$$. Sanity should always prevail.

surely "sanity" can only "always prevale" when $ are not an issue? I don't think age or wisdom have a lot to do with that.

 

[Lilly_____]

surely "sanity" can only "always prevale" when $ are not an issue? I don't think age or wisdom have a lot to do with that.

Yeah I have to agree with that. Unfortunately sanity is a luxury. As much as I care about my mental health and put myself first (that's now - wasn't always like this), there are so many times when you just need the money.

Maybe aging gives you more power to control boundaries and think your actions through more often, but at the end of the day, we all gotta eat.

 

[AmberCutie]

My 10 year camiversary is coming up this March and I don't think anyone cares, it's almost like "well shouldn't you be retired already?" *dramatic sigh* I also know that I'm PMsing like mad for the next few days and everything is always doomsday and pitfalls during this time. Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk!

I intended to fully retire at just after my 10 year cammiversary, so I feel you on a lot of the feels you've conveyed in your posts. Some days I almost feel resentful of myself for pushing for more years after I so clearly burned out a while ago, and have some of the questions in my head like you do on if how I act or portray myself now hurts my income.

I'm sorry you're struggling with finances these days, and I hope you find a happy medium in your work soon.

 

[Vixxen81]

I intended to fully retire at just after my 10 year cammiversary, so I feel you on a lot of the feels you've conveyed in your posts. Some days I almost feel resentful of myself for pushing for more years after I so clearly burned out a while ago, and have some of the questions in my head like you do on if how I act or portray myself now hurts my income.

I'm sorry you're struggling with finances these days, and I hope you find a happy medium in your work soon.

That felt like a warm hug, thank you. That's exactly it. Is it time to move on to something else? But what? It's a sunk cost fallacy. Spent all of this time building something that would inevitably fade away. Consulting work for programs on cam sites? I don't know. Just feels like major changes need to happen and I have no clue what that actually means.

 

[Finchomatic]

surely "sanity" can only "always prevale" when $ are not an issue? I don't think age or wisdom have a lot to do with that.

As I said. Sanity 'should' always prevail

But sadly we live a monetary society with those pesky little things called bills where the vast majority of us have to take care of and trying not to snap mentally trying to figure out how to maintain an income just to survive and to plan out the future.

@AmberCutie I hear you on the jaded part. I may not be a broadcaster, but I know exactly what you mean about being jaded about something and trying not to be, but it just keeps hitting you just when you thought you got over something or forgot.

 

[yummybrownfox]

That felt like a warm hug, thank you. That's exactly it. Is it time to move on to something else? But what? It's a sunk cost fallacy. Spent all of this time building something that would inevitably fade away. Consulting work for programs on cam sites? I don't know. Just feels like major changes need to happen and I have no clue what that actually means.

I feel ya, Vixxen. I had to bite the bullet the other day, and get back to applying for jobs on Indeed. I'm pretty upset about it, but this is what it's come to. In 2023 I'm trying to get the fuck out of this neighborhood.
If you ever decide to become a verified model on here and join us in the Models Only section, that's also a great area of the forum to vent. I absolutely love your posts on here.

 

[ArcticKitty]

It fucking sucks that being a smart woman often still means being smart enough to hide that you're smart. And that being smart doesn't often doesn't pay.

 

[ArcticKitty]

That's such a good question. I used to play dumb a lot more because a lot of guys seem to like that, and because I look young I think it was part of the innocent girl combo.

But the last year or so I decided to "come out" as a reasonably educated girl and had very positive results. Members like to engage in conversations about things we like in common and that also means I can attract smarter clients - who are often better tippers.

I do think of you as sweet and innocent but not naive, Lilly. And I can well believe that showing sophistication would appeal to a better grade of clientele.

 

[Lilly_____]

I do think of you as sweet and innocent but not naive, Lilly. And I can well believe that showing sophistication would appeal to a better grade of clientele.

Thank you! I think kindness and sweetness are often misunderstood for weakness and naivety (is that a word?) so that is mostly where the problem lies for me.

That felt like a warm hug, thank you. That's exactly it. Is it time to move on to something else? But what? It's a sunk cost fallacy. Spent all of this time building something that would inevitably fade away. Consulting work for programs on cam sites? I don't know. Just feels like major changes need to happen and I have no clue what that actually means.

I often have the feeling that once I made the decision to start this job, I'd never be able to get out. I don't really know how true that is. No job lasts forever though, right? I'll be rooting for you to find something that you love.

 

[ArcticKitty]

Thank you! I think kindness and sweetness are often misunderstood for weakness and naivety (is that a word?) so that is mostly where the problem lies for me.

My brother said it right when he said that just because he can be a good guy doesn't mean he's an idiot.

I often have the feeling that once I made the decision to start this job, I'd never be able to get out. I don't really know how true that is. No job lasts forever though, right? I'll be rooting for you to find something that you love.

Yeah, when I thought about camming, I didn't specifically think about moving on but having an exit strategy is very important. And difficult! Even vanilla, it's easiest to get a good job if you already have one.

 

[ArcticKitty]

I intended to fully retire at just after my 10 year cammiversary, so I feel you on a lot of the feels you've conveyed in your posts. Some days I almost feel resentful of myself for pushing for more years after I so clearly burned out a while ago, and have some of the questions in my head like you do on if how I act or portray myself now hurts my income.

I'm sorry you're struggling with finances these days, and I hope you find a happy medium in your work soon.

I wish I had money to invest, Ms. Amber. Going by your achievement in building ACF, you probably could start a venture that would be a good thing and a business success.

 

[Highlander884]

From a viewer point of view: all the popular and successful girls I follow aren't stupid, all but one is extroverted on cam though and acting/having a good time but none of them behaving like a bimbo if that's what u mean about being stupid.

 

[Smoothie]

Thank you! I think kindness and sweetness are often misunderstood for weakness and naivety (is that a word?) so that is mostly where the problem lies for me.

I think with some of the more manipulative members, it’s not that they think you’re naive or dumb just because you’re sweet and kind. They just think your kindness can be exploited.

They think they can manipulate you easier because you’re too kind to stand up to them, or that you will obey them just to avoid conflict.

Its the same reason nice people are often taken advantage of by family and “friends.” Nice people will often endure something they don’t like rather than have a negative exchange with someone else by refusing a request or favor.

 

[Vixxen81]

I feel ya, Vixxen. I had to bite the bullet the other day, and get back to applying for jobs on Indeed. I'm pretty upset about it, but this is what it's come to. In 2023 I'm trying to get the fuck out of this neighborhood.
If you ever decide to become a verified model on here and join us in the Models Only section, that's also a great area of the forum to vent. I absolutely love your posts on here.

Thanks for the love! It really does suck. I think everyone is just hitting a brick wall right now and we'll be able to knock it down but with rising costs and the site payouts not reflecting that, it all seems pretty grim. I enjoy chatting on here. It's so nice to get unbiased support. My "vanilla" friends say things like, "well you have to treat it like a business and try something new or smile more," and it's the most infuriating thing. Kind of want to give them a "well you tried" pat on the back. LOL

 

[Vixxen81]

Thank you! I think kindness and sweetness are often misunderstood for weakness and naivety (is that a word?) so that is mostly where the problem lies for me.


I often have the feeling that once I made the decision to start this job, I'd never be able to get out. I don't really know how true that is. No job lasts forever though, right? I'll be rooting for you to find something that you love.

It's not impossible, but I know so many who have tried and just gone back to camming. The lifestyle itself is so addictive from the freedom stand point alone you convince yourself it's totally worth it even if you never get ahead.

 

[yummybrownfox]

My "vanilla" friends say things like, "well you have to treat it like a business and try something new or smile more," and it's the most infuriating thing.

Lol. Bless their clueless lil' hearts. You can interact and smile until your face hurts, and members will still be like "Nice smile bb" and "You are cool as fuck"...and not tip. Lol. Non-industry chicks need to stay in their lane, and stop trying to give unsolicited advice on things they know nothing about. That's like a 40-year old male virgin (who's never even used his tongue or fingers on a woman) trying to write a book on How To Make A Woman Squirt.

 

[Vixxen81]

Lol. Bless their clueless lil' hearts. You can interact and smile until your face hurts, and members will still be like "Nice smile bb" and "You are cool as fuck"...and not tip. Lol. Non-industry chicks need to stay in their lane, and stop trying to give unsolicited advice on things they know nothing about. That's like a 40-year old male virgin (who's never even used his tongue or fingers on a woman) trying to write a book on How To Make A Woman Squirt.

My favorite is when I complain about a guy asking for something they know I don't do and they're all like I would totally do that. Tell me that to my face when you actually do that and have a room full of guy talking about what they would prefer to order at McDonald's versus Burger King instead of tipping to keep the show going. Or a full blown political discussion breaks out while you're bent seven ways to Sunday "for their pleasure."

But, I guess the biggest difference between myself and my vanilla friends is I have been married since I was 18 and was never very promiscuous before. I've never dated in an age of unsolicited dick pics or awkward sexting sessions. Basically what I get paid to do is stuff they've been doing for free for a decade. In a way I think, at least one of my friends anyway, is extremely jealous but not confident enough to give it a shot of her own.

 

[Lilly_____]

Basically what I get paid to do is stuff they've been doing for free for a decade.

Yesss. Whenever I take a peek on Instagram and see girls who went to high school with me who'll post pics in bikinis to show how hot they are and think that makes them super cool I think...girl... Why are you doing this shit for free. (Ofc I know why and I know not everyone want to sell this but my mind just works like this )

It's also usually the girls who think they're too good for our job

 

[darcyduke]

Yesss. Whenever I take a peek on Instagram and see girls who went to high school with me who'll post pics in bikinis to show how hot they are and think that makes them super cool I think...girl... Why are you doing this shit for free. (Ofc I know why and I know not everyone want to sell this but my mind just works like this )

It's also usually the girls who think they're too good for our job

So true. I can hardly even talk dirty with men these days and not want to charge them for my time

I used to dumb myself down frequently on cam, but after 10 years in the industry, I just can't be bothered to pretend to be stupid (what does 'stupid' even mean anyway?) I quite enjoy the job, even if I am doing it as a side thing along with my doctorate, but I hate guys who think you're thick. If they are freebie hunters, they love to tell me to 'get a real job,' or imply that I'm too stupid to do anything else. I think we are constantly fighting against the stereotype that all models are stupid, which drives me mad.

 

[Vixxen81]

I found this today.

OnlyFans Chatter Position - writing / editing / translation - job...

Heyas! We are a small, tight-knit chat team looking for another member to add to our nutty little group. Could that be you? (I dunno, let's find out!) **Things You Might Want to Know** *We represent...

chicago.craigslist.org

If you want to get out but still be in, you can build someone else's career by pretending to be them on OF chat features.

If this isn't allowed here, delete it please. I found it rather amusing.

 

[Vixxen81]

So true. I can hardly even talk dirty with men these days and not want to charge them for my time

I used to dumb myself down frequently on cam, but after 10 years in the industry, I just can't be bothered to pretend to be stupid (what does 'stupid' even mean anyway?) I quite enjoy the job, even if I am doing it as a side thing along with my doctorate, but I hate guys who think you're thick. If they are freebie hunters, they love to tell me to 'get a real job,' or imply that I'm too stupid to do anything else. I think we are constantly fighting against the stereotype that all models are stupid, which drives me mad.

I think there is an underlying kink with the smart/dumb thing. Some guys really get off on thinking they got one over on the model and made them do something for cheap amounts/free.

 

[Sashacurves]

It's so interesting reading the opinions and experiences from everyone in this thread. I completely agree with what's been said about the playing dumb/not saying what you'd want to say as an intelligent person because it pays to placate. But to put maybe a bit of a more positive spin on things, this is actually part of the job I often find to be a fun challenge.

Without sounding like some kind of psychopath, you're essentially manipulating people (same as with any sales job I guess) and our intelligence goes a long way towards knowing how to manipulate in the right direction depending on the particular situation. I like choosing when it's best to play bimbo (like the nipples thing @Vixxen81) and when to be open about being highly educated. There are customers who go private just to have an intellectual discussion with me, and that's stimulating for me. And there are also customers who go private just to rant to me about how clever they are, complex their job is etc and I find that just as stimulating to sit and listen and ask questions like I'm dumb, because I know what I'm doing. It doesn't really bother me how I'm perceived.

Coincidentally with some of you guys talking about wanting to maybe quit soon and/or the struggles of getting back into vanilla work after being in this industry, I handed in my notice at my vanilla job yesterday and am finally taking the plunge to do this full time. Despite 2 degrees and one (cancelled) PhD I was barely earning over minimum wage and in this financial climate, the sensible thing was to follow the money, I'll deal with the consequences later.