Need opinions on interaction

[MarieElise]

Dude, I'm a viewer also. I can see how someone can be drawn in, but all I've spent was on tips and privates. Asking me for money is a deal breaker.
And 36 isn't "old. "

Here you go guys, here's a model right here that doesn't want any money. All of you all complaining about spending money on pay to play sites, and not getting a real long term monogamous relationship out of it; go hang out with this guy.
He'll keep you busy while the rest of us interact w the normal people, that visit masturbation sites to God forbid; pay, masturbate, then leave.
Win, win.
All cam world problems solved
No more need for any more whining, yay! Moving on.

 

[KingMarti]

Here you go guys, here's a model right here that doesn't want any money. All of you all complaining about spending money on pay to play sites, and not getting a long term relationship out of it; go hang out with this guy.
He'll keep you busy while the rest of us interact w the normal people, that visit masturbation sites to God forbid; pay, masturbate, then leave.
Win, win.
All cam world problems solved
No more need for whining, yay! Moving on.

I was going to reply and fix the order of events but you already edited it.

And OP, you say you went expecting anything but the rest of that original post sounds like you thought you bought a wife.

 

[MarieElise]

I was going to reply and fix the order of events but you already edited it.

 

[yummybrownfox]

Hey, i don't mind paying, I get it ,it's how she/yall earn bread. Yall say it's a transaction, but bro, she'll call me up and yell me what a pos her baby daddy is, personal stuff about her parents, is that the usual hussle or na?

No, I think it's a safe bet to say that most cam models are not calling up members on the phone. And sharing personal things with them about family members in those conversations.

If we're on a call with one of you guys, it's usually because you're paying us for that call on SextPanther, Phrendly, Skype, etc. And during it we're careful about not blurting out personal things such as names, specific details of our whereabouts or specific locations of places we frequent, etc., because there's absolutely no reason to be telling cam site members that kind of personal info.

 

[CastizoMerican]

Here you go guys, here's a model right here that doesn't want any money. All of you all complaining about spending money on pay to play sites, and not getting a real long term monogamous relationship out of it; go hang out with this guy.
He'll keep you busy while the rest of us interact w the normal people, that visit masturbation sites to God forbid; pay, masturbate, then leave.
Win, win.
All cam world problems solved
No more need for any more whining, yay! Moving on.

Alrite Damm. Tell me how you really feel about me

 

[RainForest]

@CastizoMerican find someone local. You obviously must be a hot commodity.

 

[CastizoMerican]

I was going to reply and fix the order of events but you already edited it.

And OP, you say you went expecting anything but the rest of that original post sounds like you thought you bought a wife.

Upon further review, yes, I am capable of self reflection after calming down and criticaly thinking, no, i do not want a wife, look, im we are both human, I didn't want to treat her like a piece of steak, maybe be a little more genteel, gentle about it. And so am I, I'm a person, I would like to think even if I pay for it,they like the conversation a little

 

[CastizoMerican]

@CastizoMerican find someone local. You obviously must be a hot commodity.

Cmon I'm not so terrible, I have some redeeming qualities, should I tip you for this post because being humiliated must be what I like, im getting alot of that here

 

[CastizoMerican]

No, I think it's a safe bet to say that most cam models are not calling up members on the phone. And sharing personal things with them about family members in those conversations.

If we're on a call with one of you guys, it's usually because you're paying us for that call on SextPanther, Phrendly, Skype, etc. And during it we're careful about not blurting out personal things such as names, specific details of our whereabouts or specific locations of places we frequent, etc., because there's absolutely no reason to be telling cam site members that kind of personal info.

We live worlds apart, so,no,I'm not going to colombia to see if i can look for this gal, I ask people I talk to about what they like to do, in general, please believe,even though I'm on a Webcam gal forum , I swear I have no stalking charges on my rap sheet,

Yo real spit, ok, this chic is just someone to talk to once in awhile, I know im getting spit roasted but dam, can a man wonder a few things about someone without being told to get a back tattoo,

 

[CastizoMerican]

I'm Bill, 42, F, NYC. This is not a mid-90s AOL chatroom (Age/sex/location? Lol) or Tinder. And your dick size and description of your physical appearance isn't really necessary in the introduction either. Lol.

I'm getting roasted left and right, can yall have a little patience, believe it or not, I was trying to make myself look good, obviously didn't work

 

[CastizoMerican]

I also get compared to Scotty Scheffler, I'll take that as a compliment, David Arquette, and sometimes Andy garcia, im not quite zoolander but I do my thing. Except on here, i just get roasted here it's great

 

[Wuggie]

How many of you guys announce your age and location right away when interacting with a model?

Age, I do not care.. location, they can know Europe if it was a genuine question ;P

 

[Vixxen81]

Age, I do not care.. location, they can know Europe if it was a genuine question ;P

Guys who enter a model's room and immediately announce in a tip note where they live, how old they are and what their status is are immediately flagged as trying to use a cam site as a dating site.

It happened just last night with a guy in my room. "Hey do you like older guys?" He was met with "what difference does it make? I'm not dating you."

 

[KingMarti]

Upon further review, yes, I am capable of self reflection after calming down and criticaly thinking, no, i do not want a wife, look, im we are both human, I didn't want to treat her like a piece of steak, maybe be a little more genteel, gentle about it. And so am I, I'm a person, I would like to think even if I pay for it,they like the conversation a little

The tone of the original post is very much "I spent all this money and I got nothing to show for it" maybe that wasnt how it was intended but at least to me that is very much how it read, it would also explain a lot of the responses you have gotten. Think of it this way, you might have a friendly chat with a customer service rep, they may enjoy the conversation, but at the end of the day they are doing a job. The amount of expectation (not aimed at you specifically just something I have noticed from posts here, comments by members in cam sites and other places) and assumptions have gone up significantly recently. Again not aimed specifically at you, just one of the possible reasons why your post may have rubbed people the wrong way.

You say you dont know wheather to proceed or call it quits, whats the cause for the split decicion, this is one of those things that shows that your "gifts" were not in fact gifts but had expectations attached, otherwise there would be no confilct, it would either be "everything's cool" or "I'm done". The very fact that you are indcisive about it means that you are expecting something that you are not getting and your question is "if I keep going will I get what I want?"

 

[Wuggie]

Guys who enter a model's room and immediately announce in a tip note where they live, how old they are and what their status is are immediately flagged as trying to use a cam site as a dating site.

It happened just last night with a guy in my room. "Hey do you like older guys?" He was met with "what difference does it make? I'm not dating you."

Ooooh like that!! i misunderstood again xD nah I tell them my age if they ask me at some point, and I will always say Europe if asked where I live.. SOME know the country and city, others know what part of Europe..

but yes I do see your point then xD

 

[MarieElise]

Ooooh like that!! i misunderstood again xD nah I tell them my age if they ask me at some point, and I will always say Europe if asked where I live.. SOME know the country and city, others know what part of Europe..

but yes I do see your point then xD

Some people really don't know how to act on cam sites, it's their first interaction w sex workers ever. But, yes, Vixen is right, it's a super bad first sign.
If they slowed down and thought about it, they wouldn't start out like that, because dare I say it; it's stupid af.

I don't think I have one single long term client, who entered my room that way.
It's a major red flag for being a huge pest, in the wrong place.

 

[Wuggie]

Some people really don't know how to act on cam sites, it's their first interaction w sex workers ever. But, yes, Vixen is right, it's a super bad first sign.
If they slowed down and thought about it, they wouldn't start out like that, because dare I say it; it's stupid af.

I don't think I have one single long term client, who entered my room that way.
It's a major red flag for being a huge pest, in the wrong place.

I personally have never had any other interactions w sex workers either.. I started on cam sites 16 years ago I believe, I did find a partner through them (rare I know) and it was never intended to be like that, it just happened, it's a rather long story and I don't really share much of it publicly..

but in my mind, and I know this is wild, I just treat the girls on the cam sites exactly like I would treat anyone I met outside of the cam sites to start with.. or at least, almost, share a little less, expect less, see if we have "good energy" and then can talk about privates etc.. but hey yea, people use the sites SO differently

 

[MarieElise]

I personally have never had any other interactions w sex workers either.. I started on cam sites 16 years ago I believe, I did find a partner through them (rare I know) and it was never intended to be like that, it just happened, it's a rather long story and I don't really share much of it publicly..

but in my mind, and I know this is wild, I just treat the girls on the cam sites exactly like I would treat anyone I met outside of the cam sites to start with.. or at least, almost, share a little less, expect less, see if we have "good energy" and then can talk about privates etc.. but hey yea, people use the sites SO differently

Yeah, honestly, my favorite clients are mostly guys who have had no experience w other sex workers outside camming, and enjoy the fantasy and cerebral part of camming only.
Ime they tend to be the most fun, and least entitled.

Idk why so many struggle to treat us like humans, but my personal opinion is that it has most to do with probably sexism.

"i'M sO iN lOvE wItH hEr; I nEEd to StOp pAyiNg iMmEdIatEly!!"

Kind of off topic slightly, but I saw someone post on twitter recently; "Can we normalize paying her MORE, not less, because you developed feelings for her/ them."
And I just love that.
Guys be developing one sided feelings, then going tantrum age two on forums, and starting out all these "lets test her" plans. "I'm being scammed". It's fucking old, and brain dead.

 

[Wuggie]

Yeah, honestly, my favorite clients are mostly guys who have had no experience w other sex workers outside camming, and enjoy the fantasy and cerebral part of camming only.
Ime they tend to be the most fun, and least entitled.

Idk why so many struggle to treat us like humans, but my personal opinion is that it has most to do with probably sexism.

"i'M sO iN lOvE wItH hEr; I nEEd to StOp pAyiNg iMmEdIatEly!!"

Kind of off topic slightly, but I saw someone post on twitter recently; "Can we normalize paying her MORE not less because you developed feelings for her."
And I just love that.
Guys be developing one sided feelings, then going tantrum age two on forums, and starting out all these "lets test her" plans; I'm being scammed. It's fucking old, and brain dead.

well, it's a forum sometimes the topic develops into other things xD

I fully agree!! if it's someone I start liking more, I start spending more (when I have the money, right now as I lost all my jobs, I had to set my spending on the sites WAY down)
I don't think I can ever think of a time where I started spending LESS money, EXCEPT when me and my ex decided to meet up, and we agreed we would stop seeing others until we had seen if what we felt online was real.. at that point I started saving for the travels instead and we saw each other maybe 6 - 8 hours online anyways each day.. but I think it's completely different..

when I start feeling some kind of friendship with a model, it's rare but it happens, I will also always get her a bunch of birthday gifts etc, NO strings attached, and apparently THAT is also odd.. members buy gifts and then they have all these expectations "Oh I got you this, why won't you do X for me?" BRO it was a freaking gifts!! a gift should not have strings attached!!

and can feel this topic actually nags at me xD because I get angry even though I don't work with this anymore.. cheap people annoys me when it comes to this, if you can't pay stay off the sites, or at least stay quiet!!

 

[MarieElise]

and we saw each other maybe 6 - 8 hours online anyways each day.. but I think it's completely different..

Yes, that is completely different. In a new relationship the couple has to work collaboratively to develop and agree on the boundaries for that relationship. Then after responsible bargaining/ agreement has occurred (while neither party masturbating, and of clear mind), abide by it.

when I start feeling some kind of friendship with a model, it's rare but it happens, I will also always get her a bunch of birthday gifts etc, NO strings attached, and apparently THAT is also odd.. members buy gifts and then they have all these expectations "Oh I got you this, why won't you do X for me?" BRO it was a freaking gifts!! a gift should not have strings attached!!

That's how it has turned yes. But it never used to be that way at all. I've been doing this only 10 years, and I've seen some huge shifts in expectations the last few years. It almost reminded me of 2008 in some weird ways. Back then I lived in a small tourist town, and all of a sudden all the jobs dropped off. Bosses who once offered all these nice benefits, and treated you nice, were all of a sudden Motherfuckers. Expecting you to rent a camping spot up their ass 24/7.

cheap people annoys me when it comes to this,

Me too, but I also get angry at cheap people everywhere else too. With me it's not just confined to this sphere. Mainly because I've worked so many hospitality and tip fueled jobs.
I've been working, full-time and mostly more hours, for 28 years now, across a few different continents. I'm also an insanely generous tipper everywhere I go.

 

[CastizoMerican]

Not to change subject, but I'll tip her, her kids bday I sent 4 hunnit, and just said I hope it's a good moment for the family, I sent her 6 for her bday to take a trip, and I didn't say you gotta do this for me before I send you spit. I enjoyed,hopefully, making her happy. I'm not too cheap, and I don't bother too much, please have some mercy on this dumb man, you know we are not the smarter sex. I'm questioning why I came here, look, its the first time I've done something like this and I wondered if it was a typical interaction or na

 

[CastizoMerican]

The tone of the original post is very much "I spent all this money and I got nothing to show for it" maybe that wasnt how it was intended but at least to me that is very much how it read, it would also explain a lot of the responses you have gotten. Think of it this way, you might have a friendly chat with a customer service rep, they may enjoy the conversation, but at the end of the day they are doing a job. The amount of expectation (not aimed at you specifically just something I have noticed from posts here, comments by members in cam sites and other places) and assumptions have gone up significantly recently. Again not aimed specifically at you, just one of the possible reasons why your post may have rubbed people the wrong way.

You say you dont know wheather to proceed or call it quits, whats the cause for the split decicion, this is one of those things that shows that your "gifts" were not in fact gifts but had expectations attached, otherwise there would be no confilct, it would either be "everything's cool" or "I'm done". The very fact that you are indcisive about it means that you are expecting something that you are not getting and your question is "if I keep going will I get what I want?"

Hey look, I was just wondering because this gal would tell me personal details wvour her life and troubles she was going thru,if that was genuine or typical hussle. It seems like alot of the gals here just want the straight up "show bobs bby" i was tryinnnnnn to be little easier going, I should talk with this gal about what's cool with her,

 

[Wuggie]

Not to change subject, but I'll tip her, her kids bday I sent 4 hunnit, and just said I hope it's a good moment for the family, I sent her 6 for her bday to take a trip, and I didn't say you gotta do this for me before I send you spit. I enjoyed,hopefully, making her happy. I'm not too cheap, and I don't bother too much, please have some mercy on this dumb man, you know we are not the smarter sex. I'm questioning why I came here, look, its the first time I've done something like this and I wondered if it was a typical interaction or na

Sending her gifts and so on is fine, but you should do it because you WANT to do it, not because you expect a return in it, this can either be in feelings or sexually and such (that is my opinion)
I never said you were cheap, you spend what you can on these kind of things, but what is most important is that it brings you enjoyment, not distress.. and at the same time it should not bring someone else distress..

if you feel used, it's not the right thing for you to continue to do.. it's as simple as that from my point of view!

from all of the thread it sounds to me like you need post-nut clarity sometimes maybe ;P it helps to have friends with benefits (at least it does for me) it can really make it more enjoyable to also visit these sites.. I acutally do not visit them in 2 places of life, if I do not have a friend with benefits, or if I'm in a relationship.. exactly because then it can start feeling like real feelings and if I'm in a relationship, I think it's WAY too personal to wank off to these sites.. it might be useful for others to use it like this, it might not..

 

[yummybrownfox]

well, it's a forum sometimes the topic develops into other things xD

I fully agree!! if it's someone I start liking more, I start spending more (when I have the money, right now as I lost all my jobs, I had to set my spending on the sites WAY down)
I don't think I can ever think of a time where I started spending LESS money, EXCEPT when me and my ex decided to meet up, and we agreed we would stop seeing others until we had seen if what we felt online was real.. at that point I started saving for the travels instead and we saw each other maybe 6 - 8 hours online anyways each day.. but I think it's completely different..

when I start feeling some kind of friendship with a model, it's rare but it happens, I will also always get her a bunch of birthday gifts etc, NO strings attached, and apparently THAT is also odd.. members buy gifts and then they have all these expectations "Oh I got you this, why won't you do X for me?" BRO it was a freaking gifts!! a gift should not have strings attached!!

and can feel this topic actually nags at me xD because I get angry even though I don't work with this anymore.. cheap people annoys me when it comes to this, if you can't pay stay off the sites, or at least stay quiet!!

Lol. Take deep breaths and count to ten, Wuggie.

 

[MarieElise]

I acutally do not visit them in 2 places of life, if I do not have a friend with benefits, or if I'm in a relationship.. exactly because then it can start feeling like real feelings and if I'm in a relationship

Seems to work quite well for people in open marriages, where the sexual part is over, but they still love each other and are best friends for life, too.

Wait how did that just happen, it quoted Wuggie w Maxi's post

ETA; OMFG all these cats/ gatos are confusing the fuck out of me guys, sorry . That was Wuggie

 

[Wuggie]

Lol. Take deep breaths and count to ten, Wuggie.

hahah yuuup count to ten, drink some water, pet the kitten.. always helps

Seems to work quite well for people in open marriages, where the sexual part is over, but they still love each other and are best friends for life, too.

Wait how did that just happen, it quoted Wuggie w Maxi's post

ETA; OMFG all these cats/ gatos are confusing the fuck out of me guys, sorry . That was Wuggie

it is true! if it was an open marriage it would be different, I just never had one of those always been a one girl kind of guy when it comes to relationships.. I also always felt bad when guys would ask for shows just from me (we used a couples account), and they had their ring on and you could see they had kids from what were in their rooms.. I felt bad for them because if they swing that way they should be free to do so, and for their partner (I assumed it's a woman when they had kids, I know I shouldn't but I did) because they probably had no clue..

heheh it's okay it happens, it also confuse the hell out of me when some people change their pictures on here!! (my pictures is still an animated picture of my actual cat xD)

 

[MarieElise]

hahah yuuup count to ten, drink some water, pet the kitten.. always helps



it is true! if it was an open marriage it would be different, I just never had one of those always been a one girl kind of guy when it comes to relationships.. I also always felt bad when guys would ask for shows just from me (we used a couples account), and they had their ring on and you could see they had kids from what were in their rooms.. I felt bad for them because if they swing that way they should be free to do so, and for their partner (I assumed it's a woman when they had kids, I know I shouldn't but I did) because they probably had no clue..

So relevant!
My partner won't do shows if the guy is Bi, or if I once dated the guy in everyday life or was ever fwb. But he will, if the guy is straight, and doesn't know me outside cam sites.
It's super awkward and sensitive to negotiate responsibly. But really important to do so!

Everyone has their different boundaries and comfort levels. That is cool and should, for sure, be respected, and communicated.

 

[Wuggie]

So relevant!
My partner won't do shows if the guy is Bi, or if I once dated the guy in everyday life or was ever fwb. But he will, if the guy is straight, and doesn't know me outside cam sites.
It's super awkward and sensitive to negotiate responsibly. But really important to do so!

Everyone has their different boundaries and comfort levels. That is cool and should, for sure, be respected, and communicated.

Communication is key always yeap!! I was always fine with doing shows with people being Bi or even if they were gay, I'm okay with other guys finding me attractive, so not a problem!! I just really wish everyone could have their sexuality freely, but sometimes it's just not like that..

We never did shows for anyone that knew any of us outside of the sites.. we had maybe 2 or 3 people that found our account and we asked them kindly to visit other people, because it was just too odd for us.. like, do you really want to watch us get it on and then in 4 days we go out for drinks? naaah

 

[MarieElise]

Communication is key always yeap!! I was always fine with doing shows with people being Bi or even if they were gay, I'm okay with other guys finding me attractive, so not a problem!! I just really wish everyone could have their sexuality freely, but sometimes it's just not like that..

Yeah. I thought it was super cool that the client was upfront with me, about being Bi. As well as my partner being up front w me, about no longer wanting to do the show.
Kinda relevant, because that only just happened.
But yeah, people have all different kinds of agreements in place. Everywhere, really.

We never did shows for anyone that knew any of us outside of the sites.. we had maybe 2 or 3 people that found our account and we asked them kindly to visit other people, because it was just too odd for us.. like, do you really want to watch us get it on and then in 4 days we go out for drinks? naaah

Oh for real, that would be odd. I had a few ex peopleish menish friendishes who found me, from a town I no longer live or go very often. There will never be any going out for drinks w these friendishes (or their wives) lol.
That has been made very clear

 

[ElGato]

ETA; OMFG all these cats/ gatos are confusing the fuck out of me guys, sorry . That was Wuggie

Hey now! LOL