Model is anxious on StripChat.

[xAstroBoy]

Hey yall, i found a model on stripchat that i really enjoy, but i don't think she really like me, i even asked her phone number and tipped her accordingly to her prices, and we started chatting, and then i woke up one day, and found out she banned me for "stalking" even tho all i did send her is a picture of the beach recently, and i said "i hope you had a good sunday" , she's a super anxious girl, she admitted on instagram and to telegram that she is super anxious and she's dealing with depression and anxiety, I wanted to help her as much i can, because i imagine how she feels when she's camming online, and i dealt with anxiety and depression before.
Now i feel bad that i made her feel stalked.
All i wanted is a true friendship, not a "user" friendship off that website.
I need advice how to gain her friendship, i really enjoy talking with her, she's an amazing person off-camera and she deserves the best of this world.

 

[xAstroBoy]

Hey yall, i found a model on stripchat that i really enjoy.

I even asked her phone number and tipped her accordingly of her prices, and we started chatting.

I sent her "Good Morning" everytime i came back home from university because of her timezone and mine is +7 hour compared to hers.

I Kept chatting with her about random stuff, then she openly admitted to have depression & anxiety and i felt bad when she openly admitted that she wasn't always comfortable with her job and camming.

I never asked her private information, i was always trying to chat and make her day brighter than letting her world fall apart like she admitted in her messages before, and when she told me she was crying all i could do is try to cheer her up and try to make her laugh , after all i care about my friends.

The last message i sent her was : " i hope you have a good sunday" and sent her a picture of the beach nearby me.

Then i woke up and i saw she blocked me and banned me for "stalking", I really feel bad for how i made her feel this way.

I thought i was a friend of hers, but all she sees about me is one of her users, once again, a blank friendship, i was aming for a true friendship.

I legit feel bad that i made her feel stalked, wish she told me instead , i would have stopped sending her "good morning" , and waited for her to chat with me.

I never felt this way for a camgirl, but she's different and she has almost the same age as me, just one year younger than me.

I really enjoy talking with her, she's an amazing person off-camera and she deserves the best of this world, i feel bad and i wish we had a proper friendship, i would love to ask this forum about how i could possibly gain her true friendship and not make her see me as one of her "users" of her job.

Edit : Fixed it , i couldn't correct the top post as my editing time has expired.

 

[EmmaFox]

Hey yall, i found a model on stripchat that i really enjoy.

I even asked her phone number and tipped her accordingly of her prices, and we started chatting.

I sent her "Good Morning" everytime i came back home from university because of her timezone and mine is +7 hour compared to hers.

I Kept chatting with her about random stuff, then she openly admitted to have depression & anxiety and i felt bad when she openly admitted that she wasn't always comfortable with her job and camming.

I never asked her private information, i was always trying to chat and make her day brighter than letting her world fall apart like she admitted in her messages before, and when she told me she was crying all i could do is try to cheer her up and try to make her laugh , after all i care about my friends.

The last message i sent her was : " i hope you have a good sunday" and sent her a picture of the beach nearby me.

Then i woke up and i saw she blocked me and banned me for "stalking", I really feel bad for how i made her feel this way.

I thought i was a friend of hers, but all she sees about me is one of her users, once again, a blank friendship, i was aming for a true friendship.

I legit feel bad that i made her feel stalked, wish she told me instead , i would have stopped sending her "good morning" , and waited for her to chat with me.

I never felt this way for a camgirl, but she's different and she has almost the same age as me, just one year younger than me.

I really enjoy talking with her, she's an amazing person off-camera and she deserves the best of this world, i feel bad and i wish we had a proper friendship, i would love to ask this forum about how i could possibly gain her true friendship and not make her see me as one of her "users" of her job.

Edit : Fixed it , i couldn't correct the top post as my editing time has expired.

Leave her alone the fact you keep mentioning you tried to be her real friend is a red flag. This is our job you should enjoy talking with us but getting to personal with cam girls is a no no, cam sites are not dating sites don't treat them as such.

 

[MarieElise]

She's not offering you friendship and clearly doesn't want it. What you want doesn't matter, if the feeling isn't reciprocated.

 

[misterical]

From experience and from numerous posts on here, it's not impossible for a model and a user to be friends but it's a minefield. You both have to want it (sounds like she doesn't), there will be difficulties and misunderstandings and you're going to have to contribute to her bottom line, friend or no friend. You'll also need to be very secure in yourself because it sounds like you are looking for a relationship, not a friendship. I'll give you a week before you go off like a rocket because she went private with another guy or ignored you so she could talk to another guy in free chat (because that's how she makes money). Just from reading your post I can pretty much guarantee that you will throw the toys out of the pram like a petulant child. Sounds like she made a good decision.

As for how to be a good friend to models - don't be a stalky fucker. And did you consider that maybe she's anxious because she has bills to pay? Throw some cash her way. Of course, then you become a "user" and if you are the insecure type then you'll always doubt the friendship from that point onwards. Trust me, if you go into this thinking you'll ever meet her and have a real relationship with her then you are setting yourself up for a world of heartache. It's possible to be friends, but if you fall in love then you are fucked. You can't win here.

You should go away and read the thread linked below because it shows you just how many varying views there are about whether models and members can truly be friends. All the views on this thread are valid and the balance of opinion in the thread leans heavily towards the viewpoint that it can't and shouldn't ever happen.

https://www.ambercutie.com/forums/threads/friendship-between-a-model-and-a-member.45018/

Of course, if you are really as stalky as you sound then you should probably just stop now.

 

[xAstroBoy]

Again, i didn't mean to sound stalky, all i know is all her public information that she shared with everyone in the chat, that's all.

 

[misterical]

Again, i didn't mean to sound stalky, all i know is all her public information that she shared with everyone in the chat, that's all.

Here's a tip. Just because a model shares all of her public information in the chat, you don't need to use it to bother her. I've met a few models who are way too keen to share that kind of stuff and I always find it deeply concerning. I think it's a two part offer - sharing a number is one thing but I would still wait for an invitation to chat on a platform like Whatsapp - an opening message from her to you would be the key indicator for me. i.e. If she messaged me first then I'd reply, but otherwise no.

 

[xAstroBoy]

Here's a tip. Just because a model shares all of her public information in the chat, you don't need to use it to bother her. I've met a few models who are way too keen to share that kind of stuff and I always find it deeply concerning. I think it's a two part offer - sharing a number is one thing but I would still wait for an invitation to chat on a platform like Whatsapp - an opening message from her to you would be the key indicator for me. i.e. If she messaged me first then I'd reply, but otherwise no.

I see one of my mistakes now, also is because i never spoke to a model in my life, and now i feel very bad for how i treated her.

 

[MarieElise]

Again, i didn't mean to sound stalky, all i know is all her public information that she shared with everyone in the chat, that's all.

Yep, but again, that doesn't mean you have the right to decide you guys need to be friends, just because she shared some info, that you happen to have in common w her. Do you understand the logic? Like I can't just decide that because Madonna is Italian American, and has told the world that, that she has to be my friend because I am too. That would be super weird if I did that, right? And if I started bothering her, and then justified it by stating; "but she told the world she's Italian American, and so am I", it would sound a bit ridiculous, right?!

I share little pieces of my life, that are safe to share, that's part of connecting. Doesn't mean I want to be bothered or want extra friends outside the site. Again, not the viewers place to decide what's appropriate and safe, nor who needs "friends". For real. Boundaries. Stay in your own lane.

 

[xAstroBoy]

Yep, but again, that doesn't mean you have the right to decide you guys need to be friends, just because she shared some info, that you happen to have in common w her. Do you understand the logic? Like I can't just decide that because Madonna is Italian American, and has told the world that, that she has to be my friend because I am too. That would be super weird if I did that, right? And if I started bothering her, and then justified it by stating; "but she told the world she's Italian American, and so am I", it would sound a bit ridiculous, right?!

I share little pieces of my life, that are safe to share, that's part of connecting. Doesn't mean I want to be bothered or want extra friends outside the site. Again, not the viewers place to decide what's appropriate and safe, nor who needs "friends". For real. Boundaries. Stay in your own lane.

yeah, im sorry about it, i never realized i broke her boundaries and i wish i could apologize to that girl.

 

[misterical]

Again, i didn't mean to sound stalky, all i know is all her public information that she shared with everyone in the chat, that's all.

I think you need to be honest with us and yourself here. You don't want to be her friend, you want to be her boyfriend.

It's not impossible for a model and member to be friends but even that is prone to having many of the same issues that an offline relationship can have, with a much more difficult pathway to resolving them.

Trying to have a romantic relationship in the cam world? Don't even go there. As I've already mentioned, you'll destroy yourself emotionally. You'll become a seething, irrational, jealous mess who reads lines between the lines between the lines. There are plenty of examples of that on this forum. They all started out sounding like you. Don't destroy both your mental health and the model's. Seriously.

 

[MarieElise]

and i wish i could apologize to that girl.

That's just going to come off as even more stalkerish. Just leave her alone and move on.

 

[Deleted member 45270]

All i wanted is a true friendship, not a "user" friendship off that website.

I really enjoy talking with her, she's an amazing person off-camera and she deserves the best of this world, i feel bad and i wish we had a proper friendship, i would love to ask this forum about how i could possibly gain her true friendship and not make her see me as one of her "users" of her job.

You are on the wrong site. You should be looking at dating sites or meetup sites, and making friends/relationships elsewhere. Like every other streamer, she is there to work, and you're bothering her. You have to accept the situation for what it is, and move on.

 

[yummybrownfox]

Hey yall, i found a model on stripchat that i really enjoy, but i don't think she really like me, i even asked her phone number and tipped her accordingly to her prices, and we started chatting, and then i woke up one day, and found out she banned me for "stalking" even tho all i did send her is a picture of the beach recently, and i said "i hope you had a good sunday" , she's a super anxious girl, she admitted on instagram and to telegram that she is super anxious and she's dealing with depression and anxiety, I wanted to help her as much i can, because i imagine how she feels when she's camming online, and i dealt with anxiety and depression before.
Now i feel bad that i made her feel stalked.
All i wanted is a true friendship, not a "user" friendship off that website.
I need advice how to gain her friendship, i really enjoy talking with her, she's an amazing person off-camera and she deserves the best of this world.

Hi. Please don't go on a cam site and ask a model for her phone number. Even if you happen to see other members doing this, please just don't. Us models don't like it. We are working...trying to make money to pay our bills like everyone else. And on some sites models can get themselves BANNED for giving you their phone number anyway.

Stripchat has a texting feature called Plasma Messenger. If the model enables it, that is how you can pay to text with her even when she's not live on cam. That, as well as sites like SextPanther and Phrendly are for texting models. If your intention is to chat with women because you're hoping it will lead to meeting them in person (Cam sites are NOT the place for that), I suggest you try Tinder, Bumble, or Facebook Dating.

Bumble has three categories for making connections:

1) Date: Make moves to find that spark.
2) BFF: Make friends and find community.
3) Bizz: Move your career forward.

 

[misterical]

Hi. Please don't go on a cam site and ask a model for her phone number. Even if you happen to see other members doing this, please just don't. Us models don't like it. We are working...trying to make money to pay our bills like everyone else. And on some sites models can get themselves BANNED for giving you their phone number anyway.

I have precisely one model who communicates with me on Whatsapp and I'm aware of how privileged a situation I'm in there because she charges others a monthly fee for that. I view it as a mark of trust more than an invitation to freely spam her with my thoughts every day. I can see the potential problems with that level of access though. If a guy is insecure about his relationship with the model (or secretly in love with her) then those little grey and blue ticks are going to drive him crazier than a shithouse rat in no time.

 

[AudriTwo]

Hi. Please don't go on a cam site and ask a model for her phone number. Even if you happen to see other members doing this, please just don't. Us models don't like it. We are working...trying to make money to pay our bills like everyone else. And on some sites models can get themselves BANNED for giving you their phone number anyway.

It's also against tos on lots of sites for it's members not to gove out personal information or request it. I report every member who do on my site and im sure other models do it too. Members who do this obviously are risk getting their accounts banned.

 

[Hiunds]

It's also against tos on lots of sites for it's members not to gove out personal information or request it. I report every member who do on my site and im sure other models do it too. Members who do this obviously are risk getting their accounts banned.

I always appreciate Audri's posts. They are either dropping really well-informed knowledge or hilarious. Both in the same post when we are lucky

 

[MarieElise]

I report every member who do on my site and im sure other models do it too.

I do too . Because as well as being against the rules it could be a potential safety issue. There are dangerous people and predators out there.

 

[misterical]

I do too . Because as well as being against the rules it could be a potential safety issue. There are dangerous people and predators out there.

There are models who offer Whatsapp/Text access as a paid service. Presumably it's an administrative nightmare having to block guys when they stop paying and also making sure that they get enough of the model's time to justify the fee. Best avoided I'd imagine.

 

[misterical]

I see one of my mistakes now, also is because i never spoke to a model in my life, and now i feel very bad for how i treated her.

They're not an entirely different species. They are just human beings. I think that's key to answering your original question. If a girl you'd met outside of a cam site told you she didn't want to see you again, you'd get the message straight away. I doubt you'd be on a forum asking for help. "Leave me alone" means exactly the same in the cam world as the non cam world.

 

[MarieElise]

There are models who offer Whatsapp/Text access as a paid service. Presumably it's an administrative nightmare having to block guys when they stop paying and also making sure that they get enough of the model's time to justify the fee. Best avoided I'd imagine.

On, the site I'm on it's completely against the rules. And this thread would be a great example of why.

 

[ArcticKitty]

I really don't want to be unkind, OP, but even if it was a shock when she blocked you, it almost certainly wasn't an abrupt random action. She was in all likelihood very uncomfortable, and you completely missed it.

You said that you wanted a true friendship and not just to be seen as another user but quite frankly, she's not on cam to look for friends, she's at work. It's as simple as that. Someone pressing for uninvited intimacy, even in the context of seeking friendship, raises red flags.

I really think it's best for your wellbeing to just move on, give the camsites a rest and focus on other things in life. Specifically social relationships.

 

[misterical]

I've just read the initial post again and now I can't stop imagining her text inbox with 50 unanswered "Good Morning" messages in a row

 

[xAstroBoy]

I've just read the initial post again and now I can't stop imagining her text inbox with 50 unanswered "Good Morning" messages in a row

yeah that's another thing i fucked up , but yeh, if she reads this post, im really sorry

 

[Ich Bin]

Hey yall, i found a model on stripchat that i really enjoy.

I even asked her phone number and tipped her accordingly of her prices, and we started chatting.

I sent her "Good Morning" everytime i came back home from university because of her timezone and mine is +7 hour compared to hers.

I Kept chatting with her about random stuff, then she openly admitted to have depression & anxiety and i felt bad when she openly admitted that she wasn't always comfortable with her job and camming.

I never asked her private information, i was always trying to chat and make her day brighter than letting her world fall apart like she admitted in her messages before, and when she told me she was crying all i could do is try to cheer her up and try to make her laugh , after all i care about my friends.

The last message i sent her was : " i hope you have a good sunday" and sent her a picture of the beach nearby me.

Then i woke up and i saw she blocked me and banned me for "stalking", I really feel bad for how i made her feel this way.

I thought i was a friend of hers, but all she sees about me is one of her users, once again, a blank friendship, i was aming for a true friendship.

I legit feel bad that i made her feel stalked, wish she told me instead , i would have stopped sending her "good morning" , and waited for her to chat with me.

I never felt this way for a camgirl, but she's different and she has almost the same age as me, just one year younger than me.

I really enjoy talking with her, she's an amazing person off-camera and she deserves the best of this world, i feel bad and i wish we had a proper friendship, i would love to ask this forum about how i could possibly gain her true friendship and not make her see me as one of her "users" of her job.

Edit : Fixed it , i couldn't correct the top post as my editing time has expired.

After reading the replies you received, you may realize this Banning experience may well be the best thing that could have happened.

Hey yall, i found a model on stripchat that i really enjoy.

I even asked her phone number and tipped her accordingly of her prices, and we started chatting.

I sent her "Good Morning" everytime i came back home from university because of her timezone and mine is +7 hour compared to hers.

I Kept chatting with her about random stuff, then she openly admitted to have depression & anxiety and i felt bad when she openly admitted that she wasn't always comfortable with her job and camming.

I never asked her private information, i was always trying to chat and make her day brighter than letting her world fall apart like she admitted in her messages before, and when she told me she was crying all i could do is try to cheer her up and try to make her laugh , after all i care about my friends.

The last message i sent her was : " i hope you have a good sunday" and sent her a picture of the beach nearby me.

Then i woke up and i saw she blocked me and banned me for "stalking", I really feel bad for how i made her feel this way.

I thought i was a friend of hers, but all she sees about me is one of her users, once again, a blank friendship, i was aming for a true friendship.

I legit feel bad that i made her feel stalked, wish she told me instead , i would have stopped sending her "good morning" , and waited for her to chat with me.

I never felt this way for a camgirl, but she's different and she has almost the same age as me, just one year younger than me.

I really enjoy talking with her, she's an amazing person off-camera and she deserves the best of this world, i feel bad and i wish we had a proper friendship, i would love to ask this forum about how i could possibly gain her true friendship and not make her see me as one of her "users" of her job.

Edit : Fixed it , i couldn't correct the top post as my editing time has expired.

Hey yall, i found a model on stripchat that i really enjoy.

I even asked her phone number and tipped her accordingly of her prices, and we started chatting.

I sent her "Good Morning" everytime i came back home from university because of her timezone and mine is +7 hour compared to hers.

I Kept chatting with her about random stuff, then she openly admitted to have depression & anxiety and i felt bad when she openly admitted that she wasn't always comfortable with her job and camming.

I never asked her private information, i was always trying to chat and make her day brighter than letting her world fall apart like she admitted in her messages before, and when she told me she was crying all i could do is try to cheer her up and try to make her laugh , after all i care about my friends.

The last message i sent her was : " i hope you have a good sunday" and sent her a picture of the beach nearby me.

Then i woke up and i saw she blocked me and banned me for "stalking", I really feel bad for how i made her feel this way.

I thought i was a friend of hers, but all she sees about me is one of her users, once again, a blank friendship, i was aming for a true friendship.

I legit feel bad that i made her feel stalked, wish she told me instead , i would have stopped sending her "good morning" , and waited for her to chat with me.

I never felt this way for a camgirl, but she's different and she has almost the same age as me, just one year younger than me.

I really enjoy talking with her, she's an amazing person off-camera and she deserves the best of this world, i feel bad and i wish we had a proper friendship, i would love to ask this forum about how i could possibly gain her true friendship and not make her see me as one of her "users" of her job.

Edit : Fixed it , i couldn't correct the top post as my editing time has expired.

By Banning you, she did you a big favor. That was kind of her. You mentioned you had never talked to a model before. You're fortunate you picked her. Someone else may have played you along and taken advantage of you in a very big and cruel way. The Forum has many sad stories. The camming world, like life, is a learning experience. The replies you received from your OP are well worth your consideration and can make visiting models enjoyable for them and You.

 

[misterical]

yeah that's another thing i fucked up , but yeh, if she reads this post, im really sorry

She's highly unlikely to read your post to be honest.

I think all of us as users have become close to models at one time or another. You'll also find models on here saying that they have indeed become close to customers as well. However, it sounded to me that you wanted something more. That doesn't make you a bad person. These are websites full of beautiful, charming women. It's easy to fall in love but it's also a big mistake. There's an entire megathread about it pinned at the top. Start reading a few of the stories and watch the guys descend into madness. As someone else has said, she was kind to you. You'll find many examples of guys being taken to the cleaners financially by unethical models who are running love scams in conjunction with their studios. Be glad that it wasn't that.

It's possible for models and users to be friends, but my view would be that it can never be more than that. Once it becomes more than that for one half of the friendship (and it's usually the guy who falls hard) then it's just a bad situation for everyone involved. Be happy you got out before you got in too deep.