Just had a fight with a girl who stopped camming years ago. please give me support.

[Bacondude1234]

shes from russia. After communicating with her for years, after she quit her job camming, after i gave her THOUSANDS of dollars. like seriously over $50,000 at least. she tells me today she would not communicate with me if i did not sent her money. The whole time I KNEW this. just now thats its officially over i am very upset. I knew the whole time. It was never anything "romantic" between us. I just wanted to be her friend. I went into it full well knowing she just talked to me for the money, so please dont even bring it up. I know she was playing me the whole time. Just now everything finally exploded. on one hand i feel relieved that its all over. on the other, I know I will miss her greatly and I am upset. just someone tell me i will be ok.

 

[mira_leo]

move on.

 

[LaceyRoyce]

shes from russia. After communicating with her for years, after she quit her job camming, after i gave her THOUSANDS of dollars. like seriously over $50,000 at least. she tells me today she would not communicate with me if i did not sent her money. The whole time I KNEW this. just now thats its officially over i am very upset. I knew the whole time. It was never anything "romantic" between us. I just wanted to be her friend. I went into it full well knowing she just talked to me for the money, so please dont even bring it up. I know she was playing me the whole time. Just now everything finally exploded. on one hand i feel relieved that its all over. on the other, I know I will miss her greatly and I am upset. just someone tell me i will be ok.

You'll be ok but I do think now would be an excellent time to seek some mental health support. You knew this behavior was not real yet you willingly continued and deluded yourself... I think it would be helpful for you to look at why that is with a trained therapist. It will help you figure out how to avoid getting yourself into a situation like this again and hopefully seek out connections that better serve you.

 

[Life_Happens]

You just wanted to be her friend.
You have other friends IRL, I'm sure. Do they talk to you because you give them money? No!
I think you will get over this quickly because you will realize that she didn't want to be friends with YOU.
Take it as a lesson learned and apply it to future "relationships"
Now start using that money for some fun and recreation, dude. There is a life outside of hot women on a computer screen!

 

[THE MOLLIE MARIE]

I kind of appreciate this post, because you are honest in it. I hope that you can be honest like this with yourself in the moment, moving forward. Rather than looking back and seeing that you acted in denial of the truth you were aware of. You will be okay. Feel your feelings while you are processing this, just don't let them turn to anger toward yourself or others. Nothing can be undone, but you can be different now, and you'll be better prepared for what life brings in the future.

 

[ThePrincessLuxy]

It sounds like you got a really great deal for the time you got to spend with her. She doesn't owe you anything when the transaction ends. You'll be fine, break ups are always for the better.

 

[Deleted member 45270]

You'll be okay. You invested time and money into this relationship knowing that it likely was transactional. But the relief you feel is telling that this wasn't meant to have gone on any longer. Cutting even the most toxic person out is hard, but doable and worth it - you missing her is your brain wanting to go back to the highs. You can absolutely get those good highs from a healthy, loving relationship outside of adult entertainment sites.

+1 to seeking mental health help as well, not just for the sadness you feel currently but also to help understand what made you fall into this transactional relationship in the first place, to avoid falling into the same trap in the future. Best of luck to you.

 

[Bacondude1234]

You'll be ok but I do think now would be an excellent time to seek some mental health support. You knew this behavior was not real yet you willingly continued and deluded yourself... I think it would be helpful for you to look at why that is with a trained therapist. It will help you figure out how to avoid getting yourself into a situation like this again and hopefully seek out connections that better serve you.

Thank you for this. I will definitely be seeking out professional help.

I kind of appreciate this post, because you are honest in it. I hope that you can be honest like this with yourself in the moment, moving forward. Rather than looking back and seeing that you acted in denial of the truth you were aware of. You will be okay. Feel your feelings while you are processing this, just don't let them turn to anger toward yourself or others. Nothing can be undone, but you can be different now, and you'll be better prepared for what life brings in the future.

Very wise words, thank you. I needed to hear that.

You just wanted to be her friend.
You have other friends IRL, I'm sure. Do they talk to you because you give them money? No!
I think you will get over this quickly because you will realize that she didn't want to be friends with YOU.
Take it as a lesson learned and apply it to future "relationships"
Now start using that money for some fun and recreation, dude. There is a life outside of hot women on a computer screen!

So true. I have wasted so many times interacting with her through glass. This is not real human connection. I know we were never "friends". my own delusion made me think it could happen. At the end of our interaction, I told her I wanted to see her more. She did not like hearing this because she told me that unlike me, she does not expect anything from our "friendship" . That's when I called her out and told her that she "expects money". I then asked her if she would still communicate with me the same without it.... i already knew the answer... years ago.

Just really regret sending so much money.

You'll be okay. You invested time and money into this relationship knowing that it likely was transactional. But the relief you feel is telling that this wasn't meant to have gone on any longer. Cutting even the most toxic person out is hard, but doable and worth it - you missing her is your brain wanting to go back to the highs. You can absolutely get those good highs from a healthy, loving relationship outside of adult entertainment sites.

+1 to seeking mental health help as well, not just for the sadness you feel currently but also to help understand what made you fall into this transactional relationship in the first place, to avoid falling into the same trap in the future. Best of luck to you.

thank you so much. I really appreciate the support and words of wisdom.

 

[Finchomatic]

@Bacondude1234

Many of us including myself have been in you shoes.
Just don't try to find someone online again to fill the void that is currently created. You'll just go down the same path again and make the same mistakes. I know I did.
I'm glad you feel that it is finally over. Time will heal. I know it did for me after I finally opened my eyes about myself.
Stay strong. Stay positive.

 

[Omne35]

Sometimes losing a fantasy can hurt more than reality.
As long as you follow up with professional help you'll be fine.

 

[Horny_ali]

I think as others have said please do get some mental health help as you knew this was not real yet you carried on I am guessing in the hope you where wrong. Please try to get some support to deal with the reasons behind this and the emotions this will cause.
I also feel this girl was totally in the wrong as web cam models yes we entertain yes you can come and talk to us and spend time enjoying each other's company however their should always be boundaries I see myself as offering a service not taking advantage of people. And in my opinion she took advantage you say she had not been caming and still stayed in contact because you where giving her money that's crossing all sorts of lines to me.

 

[bud9752]

Thank you for this. I will definitely be seeking out professional help.



Very wise words, thank you. I needed to hear that.



So true. I have wasted so many times interacting with her through glass. This is not real human connection. I know we were never "friends". my own delusion made me think it could happen. At the end of our interaction, I told her I wanted to see her more. She did not like hearing this because she told me that unlike me, she does not expect anything from our "friendship" . That's when I called her out and told her that she "expects money". I then asked her if she would still communicate with me the same without it.... i already knew the answer... years ago.

Just really regret sending so much money.



thank you so much. I really appreciate the support and words of wisdom.

you need Bacon therapy , buy a couple pounds and treat yourself

 

[classy_medeeea]

you need Bacon therapy , buy a couple pounds and treat yourself

I laughed hard )))) Why don't we have the Haha button?? )

 

[fingerblast]

she would not communicate with me if i did not sent her money. The whole time I KNEW this.

I know I'm late on posting to this thread too, but I want to reply anyway because I'm Dr. Phil.

That's how an exchange normally works. You're paying for a service and she provided the service. The whole time in your message you're writing as if you were used. You weren't used or led on. You paid for an exchange and she delivered from the sounds of it.

She told you if you didn't keep paying she would no longer communicate. Hence, the exchange is finished. After all, she retired. No longer obligated.

I knew the whole time. It was never anything "romantic" between us. I just wanted to be her friend.

If you knew why be upset? Of course it wasn't romantic. Another reason you shouldn't be upset.

Reality: It doesn't matter what you want after she quits her cam career. Just because you spent over 50k on her total doesn't mean you're in her life forever.

You paid for faps, attention, a cam girl therapist, and the "girlfriend experience" like most other guys on cam sites do.

I went into it full well knowing she just talked to me for the money, so please dont even bring it up.

"Please don't bring it up" because you don't want your feelings hurt more? You have attachment issues and problems you need to fix in your life. The way you worded and explained your post screams it. Asking people not to bring it up is you being salty and emo.

You don't need someone to spare your feelings telling you, "It'll be okay" like you're expecting people to by posting this thread. You need somebody to tell you the truth. But people like you don't want to be told the truth because you'd rather live in your fantasy world forever. In the meantime you're letting the world and opportunity pass you by.

She moved onto another part of your life. People get left behind. Have you never left old friends behind to move onto the next part of your life? Or are all of your friends from 1st grade still around?

I know she was playing me the whole time. Just now everything finally exploded. on one hand i feel relieved that its all over. on the other,

You'd feel more relieved if you went and lived life. You're emo because you think a girl will solve your inner "problems". Other people can't make you feel less sad about friends or anything in your personal life, inner-self, whatever. That's something you have to do for yourself in your personal life first. Your happiness doesn't start and end on any one person except yourself. Youtube: "My happiness is paramount".

I know I will miss her greatly and I am upset. just someone tell me i will be ok.

You're missing a fantasy that you paid for.

"Just someone tell me I will be ok".
Again, you're wanting people to tell you what you want to hear because you're feeling pity for yourself. It's not that serious. The only person who's going to tell a self pitying person what they want to hear is a crappy friend.



I don't know why ACF attracts people who post 1-5 times to vent about a cam girl they thought was their girlfriend or feel a girl wrongfully scammed him or whatever else.

Every time it's *guy creates account so they can post a blog because I feel emo about their feelings. Hoping some one will take her place and feel better for 5 minutes until emo again tomorrow morning over the same thing.*

If you're that hurt she left and you knew she was only talking to you for the financial exchange then stop spending money on cam girls. Because the next girl you pay for that exchange will eventually retire too. You have emotional problems you need to address.