I met someone awesome, and now I'm puzzled. Help me solve it?

[heybarkeep]

Get drunk and tell how you really feel, if it doesn't go well apologize the next day and carry on as you were

Probably not the most sound of advice but worse options surely exist. He should go out and have a few drinks and meet new people. Odds are he will forget all about any internet drama he has going on.

 

[curacing]

It was said a bit tongue in cheek.
If you guys are such good mates on her cam and chat for hours on social media why has this never come up in conversation? I feel there is something we are not getting in this potential relationship

 

[JoleneBrody]

I’m confused.
You chat lots when she’s off cam.
You don’t want to meet in person.

What exactly are you wanting then? It sounds like you already have on online friendship, if you want it to stay online only what do you even want to change?

 

[Tartan]

I met someone awesome once and then I realised I was looking in the mirror

 

[Carmita Bonita]

I always feel like these threads can be quickly solved 99% of the time by just asking the model what you want to know.

We don't have the answers to this and can't 'solve' these things because we're not her. Cam models will let you know if we think of you as more than an online friend and if they want to pursue a 'true' friendship as you put it. If she hasn't mentioned anything like that yet then you already know the answer...

Enjoy what she DOES offer you and be grateful for that.

 

[AmberCutie]

I always feel like these threads can be quickly solved 99% of the time by just asking the model what you want to know.

I dunno about this case though. It sounds like his question would be "can we be Internet friends off-site and know each others real lives and info?"

Which would likely make her uncomfortable and he risks losing the cam site friendship he already has.

 

[Carmita Bonita]

I dunno about this case though. It sounds like his question would be "can we be Internet friends off-site and know each others real lives and info?"

Which would likely make her uncomfortable and he risks losing the cam site friendship he already has.

Good point. That's always sooo awkward to deal with and I never know what to say myself when that happens but I always watch my interactions with the person after that so they don't 'get the wrong idea' so to speak.

 

[Tristyn]

Enjoy your relationship with her as a cam girl or leave her alone. Seriously, 99.9% of cam girls aren't looking for more than that.

 

[Goblin]

Do you guys think people who post threads like this are more or less likely to become real friends with the model?

I always think less, because if you're emotional/socially intelligent you wouldn't need to ask here

If you were a relaxed personality you wouldn't stress about it

And both of the above make it more likely someone would be want to be friends with you, when that wasn't their initial intention

 

[CoffeeKnight]

Do you guys think people who post threads like this are more or less likely to become real friends with the model?

I always think less, because if you're emotional/socially intelligent you wouldn't need to ask here

If you were a relaxed personality you wouldn't stress about it

And both of the above make it more likely someone would be want to be friends with you, when that wasn't their initial intention

This. I could be wrong but I read the OP as basically saying he couldn't get past the idea of having a friend he met on a cam site because of the stigma he feels at having been a client and/or the idea of having met someone on an adult site in general. He was astonished (astonished!) that he might have something in common with a model outside of the usual member/model transaction. It is almost like she is a real person with interests beyond taking her clothes off or something. Like I said, I could be off but that was the tone I picked up from his post and it kind of rubbed me the wrong way.

And outside of that, I have found that if the chemistry is there friendships and relationships tend to just happen without the need for hand wringing. Not to say I've never done hand wringing or felt like a bad friend at times, but rarely if ever was it needed or helped the situation.

 

[Tma4002]

Every time I see one of these threads I just can’t understand why people don’t manage expectations. I do believe you can make friends with models but always remember that cam land is fantasy. I have 2 models I consider friends.

The first is a cam veteran. She amazing and a really good friend to me. I never bring up meeting or anything of the sort, although she did once when she got drunk lol. Analyze the situation and be honest with yourself. I’m not really sure I would want to meet her.

The second only did a handful of shows and quit. We have been talking for maybe half a year now since she stopped cramming and she never asks for anything from me. I consider this a little more pure friendship because let’s be honest it is. I still will never ask to meet her or be anything more than friends.

You have to keep in mind like the models have said here....no matter what this is still a job. If you have a friendship support your friend. I believe 100% in letting things be organic and grow how they will. If she is interested in more you wouldn’t have to ask the question because she would let you know.

 

[heybarkeep]

It was said a bit tongue in cheek.
If you guys are such good mates on her cam and chat for hours on social media why has this never come up in conversation? I feel there is something we are not getting in this potential relationship

Ah, got it. Wasn't really sure and figured best to be safe when the person seems rather susceptible. Not to save him the hilariously emo embarrassment so much as to keep her from being subjected to such a display of anti bro behavior.

 

[CharlieCharma]

I have a few snapchat subscribers I consider friends. They send me pictures of their pets, send support when I'm feeling sad(2 sent me Dominos gift cards when my dog died and I didn't want to leave my bed), and share recipes with me. They have paid their way into being taken seriously. I'm not friends with all my subscribers, so it's not just a "throw money at me" thing. It's a show me that you respect me enough to pay me and bring happiness to my life.

So. tip her and add genuine kindness.

 

[briandf255]

He was astonished (astonished!) that he might have something in common with a model outside of the usual member/model transaction. It is almost like she is a real person with interests beyond taking her clothes off or something. Like I said, I could be off but that was the tone I picked up from his post and it kind of rubbed me the wrong way.

I didn't read it like that at all... It seemed to me that the OP is relatively new and he didn't expect them to click the way they did, but when you then assume that it was because the he was astonished that the cam girl turned out to be a real human being with a personality and likes and dislikes and that's what surprised him then I think you're bringing your own bias into it.

To be honest, I think the people who think that cam girls are brainless sex machines are the least likely to hit it off with a cam girl and become friends, because they probably don't ever have the types of personal conversations that could lead to a friendship. People who think like that can't empathize with women at all.

Edit: When I started doing this, I expected it to be all business, too. I didn't realize that I would become friends with several cam girls.

 

[CoffeeKnight]

I didn't read it like that at all... It seemed to me that the OP is relatively new and he didn't expect them to click the way they did, but when you then assume that it was because the he was astonished that the cam girl turned out to be a real human being with a personality and likes and dislikes and that's what surprised him then I think you're bringing your own bias into it.

To be honest, I think the people who think that cam girls are brainless sex machines are the least likely to hit it off with a cam girl and become friends, because they probably don't ever have the types of personal conversations that could lead to a friendship. People who think like that can't empathize with women at all.

Edit: When I started doing this, I expected it to be all business, too. I didn't realize that I would become friends with several cam girls.

Like I said, it was just how I read the post and I could be wrong. I've side eyed this post for a little while now not really wanting to get involved and rereading it some of the language seems off to me. Maybe it is just poor word choice or maybe English isn't his first language but something I can't quite put my finger on rubbed me the wrong way.

Any bias I brought to the post is probably because of the dozens of similar posts I've seen from people that are either new to visiting cam models or lack the maturity to understand cam sites aren't dating sites (or friend making sites). Rarely do those threads go in the direction the OPs want.

 

[Tma4002]

I have a few snapchat subscribers I consider friends. They send me pictures of their pets, send support when I'm feeling sad(2 sent me Dominos gift cards when my dog died and I didn't want to leave my bed), and share recipes with me. They have paid their way into being taken seriously. I'm not friends with all my subscribers, so it's not just a "throw money at me" thing. It's a show me that you respect me enough to pay me and bring happiness to my life.

So. tip her and add genuine kindness.

Yes exactly this. I have sent several gifts based off of conversations knowing it was something she would enjoy. Show her you listen and care and let nature take its course. If it never becomes anything more than it is I’ve never heard of a person suffering from having someone that was only a friend.

 

[briandf255]

Like I said, it was just how I read the post and I could be wrong. I've side eyed this post for a little while now not really wanting to get involved and rereading it some of the language seems off to me. Maybe it is just poor word choice or maybe English isn't his first language but something I can't quite put my finger on rubbed me the wrong way.

Maybe it was the vagueness of his post. A lot of people are trying to figure out what exactly he thinks is the issue with his current situation with that cam girl.

 

[heybarkeep]

I dunno about this case though. It sounds like his question would be "can we be Internet friends off-site and know each others real lives and info?"

Which would likely make her uncomfortable and he risks losing the cam site friendship he already has.

Might sound a tad random here but dudes seem to be looking for normal friendships at camsites and that isn't what camgirls are there to offer. Can still find enjoyment and be respectful at camsites while being fully aware of the huge differences involved in a camsite friendship.