F-in token beggars

[justjoinedtopost]

Let me say this...I am a firm believer that models deserve compensation for their performances. And on the token sites, when I see situations where compensation does not come, it grieves me.

I like to skype. With a model I have gotten to know well, this is often a sex show. But early on, I am more of a chatter. I want to know about them. Are they going to school? What are they studying? What are their plans? If they are comfortable talking about things like this, I love to listen. And I pay for the privilege.

Last night, I hid and ignored a model. She is incredibly beautiful, very intelligent, studying to be a doctor. Had a few brief chats with her, and she pretty much had me on the hook. But she is now iggied, and this is the third time I have hidden a model for this.

Here is what happened. I got a pm...

model: Hi!
model: I'm having a bad night on MFC
model: Can you come give me some tokens?
model: Pleeaasssee?

Disgusting.

If she had said "Hey bb, wanna come play?" could have been a completely different story

I have tipped her on 3 sites. Bought 2 skypes. Chatted with her a little in 3 different rooms. But now, she will not get another minute of my time, nor will she get so much as 1 more token from me.

This concludes my vent.

 

[barbeque]

I'm an average tipper (I think), and this also leaves a bad taste for me, but the few times I have gotten this, I have replied along the lines of "sure, i'll come over and tip if I see what I like...". And I'll behave/ tip no different from usual.

Notwithstanding, it definitely turns me off for the model.

 

[AmberCutie]

I'm an average tipper (I think), and this also leaves a bad taste for me, but the few times I have gotten this, I have replied along the lines of "sure, i'll come over and tip if I see what I like...". And I'll behave/ tip no different from usual.

Notwithstanding, it definitely turns me off for the model.

That's reinforcing their bad behavior, though.

Like JJTP said, there's a difference between:

"Hey bb, wanna come play?"

and

Can you come give me some tokens?
Pleeaasssee?

Both can be negative, but the first it at least playful and guised instead of outright asking for money. If outright asking keeps working to get people to even just come in her room, she'll continue that tactic. If you guys don't like it, don't reward it with a response.

 

[shylurkerdude]

During the week I had a really nice Skype with a model. An hour later she was back on MFC so I PMed her to thank her for the Skype.... her reply was "MB some tkns??" I just replied "OK bye" I don't see myself going back to her room, it was such a negative and spoiled the positive thoughts I had for her.

 

[Curvey_Sasha]

I won't even message a member unless we are close friends and usually only to chat. I would never want someone to join my room out of guilt. I'm probably paranoid about seeming pushy but they know where to find me.

 

[justjoinedtopost]

I won't even message a member unless we are close friends and usually only to chat. I would never want someone to join my room out of guilt. I'm probably paranoid about seeming pushy but they know where to find me.

I appreciated this. Even though the "wanna come play" I mentioned wouldn't have been a deal breaker, it still would have felt like pressure.

 

[sexyvanessa4u]

Ugh, I hate it when camgirls do that-gives all of us a bad name and doesn't help with the guys who call us money hungry and token whores. Even if I'm having a horrible earnings day, I won't do that. I wait for members to initiate messaging me-sometimes I feel like even a "Hi" can be interpreted as "Come to my room and tip me," even though I genuinely just want to say hi.

 

[xDollPartsx]

I totally see where you guys are coming from, I tend to be the type who still has a hard time even asking for things that should be customary (like if someone asks for a flash or whatever without tipping) for fear of coming off this way to them. Don't get me wrong, I don't do things for free but I rarely come flat out and ask for tokens. Usually I make hints along the lines of..."that can be arranged..." Or "I'm all for it, just waiting on your signal and we can definitely do that". Haha which as obvious as I feel it is even my usual tipping people don't get it at times and when it finally hits them they will be like " DUH, my bad I forgot to tip!" And then end up doing so. But I also am the type to PM my friends or even send a quick hello hope you're well or how was your week/day to newer friends list adds that I haven't talked to in a while(if they are someone I had a convo with previously that is). My regs know I really am just saying hi and am curious how they are and know that should they be busy or enjoying another room at the moment they can just say they are busy or we will catch up another time and I'm all fine and good with that. Some people however, I believe, take it as me expecting them to come running to my room just cause I'm on and either ignore me entirely(which makes me feel like crap in a couple different ways) or reply with a "I'll be right there!" Instead of answering my how was your day... Which is nice but makes me feel guilty as if they feel pressured to hang...I usually make it a point to say that they can take their time and do their thing I just wanted to say hey. Some get it right away if they have spoken to me before a couple times that I'm not just saying that and I do mean it, some it takes me saying it flat out a few different times before it sinks in that I really am just saying hi or wishing them well because that's how I am.
Although I will say, and I'm still struggling with this but working on it, the ones who ignore me multiple times do eventually get sent a (polite, mind you) PM that says something along the lines of "I hope you're well and I wanted to thank you for everything you've done, you're always welcome if you decide to pop in and I'll gladly add you back upon seeing you in my chat but to avoid bugging you I'm going to remove you from my list for now, thanks again!"
Some people get mad and think it's a tactic, but in reality I'm trying to preserve my own hurt feelings in doing that because it makes my heart all sad when I see someone online I've enjoyed the company of and thought had some sort of rapport with and they ignore my just trying to be a friend and say hello. And I am not full of it on the adding back either, I have a weird photographic memory so I do know when they pop back in my room that they were on my list previously and I add them back. Oh wow long winded ramble that probably meandered a bit too much.

 

[BobbyB]

I like to be left alone if I am not in a model room.....
If I want to contact a girl I will do so and because I am fully aware that models want to make money I see even an innocent " How are you today ?" as an attempt to increase revenue....

 

[shylurkerdude]

Wow this is a tough one for me, I actually don't mind if the girl says hello in PM. I take it as friendly and reply as such. I have very few models on my friends list so the chances are I was going to her room anyway. If it is a newish model to me I take it as a sign that she enjoy my company and would like me in her room.
On the flip side there is a girl who I was visiting for a few weeks and tipping a little. She was always friendly to me and answered my PM etc but she never PMed me in the room to ask me a question or find out about me. She also never said hello to me in PM when she or I logged on the MFC. I have stopped going to her room because I feel there is no connection between us.

 

[ANA_K]

Wow this is a tough one for me, I actually don't mind if the girl says hello in PM. I take it as friendly and reply as such. I have very few models on my friends list so the chances are I was going to her room anyway. If it is a newish model to me I take it as a sign that she enjoy my company and would like me in her room.
On the flip side there is a girl who I was visiting for a few weeks and tipping a little. She was always friendly to me and answered my PM etc but she never PMed me in the room to ask me a question or find out about me. She also never said hello to me in PM when she or I logged on the MFC. I have stopped going to her room because I feel there is no connection between us.

It isn't like that & here are the reasons:

1. It can be real busy & it's hard to be in PM and chat.
2. She could be busy in PM with other members.
3. Some of us just leave you guys alone. I wouldn't want models pm'ing me while I'm scanning the site.
4. Sometimes just a hello can give the impression that we want your tokens.
5. I use the desktop app and can't even see who's online when I'm in my chat without pulling up that box.
6. A lot of members room hop. I have a bunch who tip several models and they usually get around to me at some point. Goes back to #3.

 

[Lili_xo]

There are so many topics like this already that I wonder maybe members who do not want to receive pms from models simply chose option in dashboard to not receive pms from models.No I never pmd a member like this. Ever. But if i was a member and it bothered me -all these pms- is what i would do.

 

[shylurkerdude]

4. Sometimes just a hello can give the impression that we want your tokens.

I really have no problem with this. I consider it like a shopkeeper saying hello when you walk into his/her store, I don't feel it is putting pressure on me to buy but it is a little positive that might make me buy. It is basically good business no matter what your line of work. If I go into the same store all the time and usually buy something and the shopkeeper ignores me when I walk in that is a negative to me

 

[justjoinedtopost]

There are so many topics like this already that I wonder maybe members who do not want to receive pms from models simply chose option in dashboard to not receive pms from models.No I never pmd a member like this. Ever. But if i was a member and it bothered me -all these pms- is what i would do.

I do cut them off sometimes when I don't want to be bothered. The pm's that sometimes make me feel pressured or what not, I can deal with. But in the case of the token beggar, I was thoroughly enjoying the back-and-forths. Right up until she went and f*cked it all up for me.

 

[Bandog]

I totally see where you guys are coming from, I tend to be the type who still has a hard time even asking for things that should be customary (like if someone asks for a flash or whatever without tipping) for fear of coming off this way to them. Don't get me wrong, I don't do things for free but I rarely come flat out and ask for tokens. Usually I make hints along the lines of..."that can be arranged..." Or "I'm all for it, just waiting on your signal and we can definitely do that". Haha which as obvious as I feel it is even my usual tipping people don't get it at times and when it finally hits them they will be like " DUH, my bad I forgot to tip!" And then end up doing so. But I also am the type to PM my friends or even send a quick hello hope you're well or how was your week/day to newer friends list adds that I haven't talked to in a while(if they are someone I had a convo with previously that is). My regs know I really am just saying hi and am curious how they are and know that should they be busy or enjoying another room at the moment they can just say they are busy or we will catch up another time and I'm all fine and good with that. Some people however, I believe, take it as me expecting them to come running to my room just cause I'm on and either ignore me entirely(which makes me feel like crap in a couple different ways) or reply with a "I'll be right there!" Instead of answering my how was your day... Which is nice but makes me feel guilty as if they feel pressured to hang...I usually make it a point to say that they can take their time and do their thing I just wanted to say hey. Some get it right away if they have spoken to me before a couple times that I'm not just saying that and I do mean it, some it takes me saying it flat out a few different times before it sinks in that I really am just saying hi or wishing them well because that's how I am.
Although I will say, and I'm still struggling with this but working on it, the ones who ignore me multiple times do eventually get sent a (polite, mind you) PM that says something along the lines of "I hope you're well and I wanted to thank you for everything you've done, you're always welcome if you decide to pop in and I'll gladly add you back upon seeing you in my chat but to avoid bugging you I'm going to remove you from my list for now, thanks again!"
Some people get mad and think it's a tactic, but in reality I'm trying to preserve my own hurt feelings in doing that because it makes my heart all sad when I see someone online I've enjoyed the company of and thought had some sort of rapport with and they ignore my just trying to be a friend and say hello. And I am not full of it on the adding back either, I have a weird photographic memory so I do know when they pop back in my room that they were on my list previously and I add them back. Oh wow long winded ramble that probably meandered a bit too much.

I like a quick PM from a model, shows that I am more than a money tree. Plus, I usually have MFC open but I am not in any room as I tend to only have one or maybe two models I chat with/play with. So, a PM saying I'm here is fantastic or I may not know you are on and available.

 

[ComicOzzie]

Wow this is a tough one for me, I actually don't mind if the girl says hello in PM. I take it as friendly and reply as such. I have very few models on my friends list so the chances are I was going to her room anyway. If it is a newish model to me I take it as a sign that she enjoy my company and would like me in her room.
On the flip side there is a girl who I was visiting for a few weeks and tipping a little. She was always friendly to me and answered my PM etc but she never PMed me in the room to ask me a question or find out about me. She also never said hello to me in PM when she or I logged on the MFC. I have stopped going to her room because I feel there is no connection between us.

Please dont expect models to PM you, especially when you are already in their chatroom. That's what free chat is for.

 

[shylurkerdude]

Please dont expect models to PM you, especially when you are already in their chatroom. That's what free chat is for.

I often get PM's from models I'm friendly with while I'm in their room, they use it to discuss something that can't be said in free chat..... and in turn I try limit what I PM them about to stuff that can't be mentioned in main chat.

 

[BooyaaS]

If I'm online i'm usually just chilling in one of the popular rooms and doing stuff in other browser tabs so if a model who i'm friendly with comes online i won't even know unless they message me and if i do get get messaged then i tend to go to their room.

 

[yummybrownfox]

model: Hi!
model: I'm having a bad night on MFC
model: Can you come give me some tokens?
model: Pleeaasssee?

 

[K_Luxxe]

I like all of the thoughtful replies in this post, but I can't help but feel like this is such a slippery slope man.
A. I think there is a huge difference between asking for tokens or begging for actual monetary gain.
B. I seriously feel like "Hi, hello, how are you, come play bb, or anything else should be completely acceptable. Here is why:

I mean, if any guy or girl says a model does this for free, you're full of shit. Seriously. If that is fact 1, then we could use that fact to deduce that technically, ANYTHING a model says could be a "ruse" to get money out of you.

Se where this gets slippery? I feel like any contact from a model has to be from category A or category B. You will NEVER know honestly whether something being said from category B is because someone geniunely likes you, or because you help keep their heat on in winter. I'm not saying all models are money hungry gold diggers, and I'm not saying that all models don't actually genuinely grow to care for their regular tippers or consider people in their chat rooms as friends... But if you get bothered by someone just messaging you to say hi...

Well.

I guess that's where in my opinion, I'd prefer you just stay out of my chat room then.

 

[JoleneBrody]

This thread really shows the DRASTIC difference in member opinions when it comes to PM's, and why models get paranoid. On one hand, lot's of members will think less of you immediately and maybe never visit again if you PM them when they are not in your room, while others like Shy lurker will chose to not visit a model again if she DOESN'T pm a hello just to him while she's live entertaining a room of people. (yes I added that little descriptive part at the end to emphasis the level of personal attention he is expecting is maybe a tad above average)

There are SO many things on MFC we can test and play with that will not result in more than maybe a handful of members telling you it didn't work out... PM'ing seems to be the do or don't and suffer drastically either way! So be patient and honest maybe? if a girl pm's often to say hello and you don't like it, maybe just tell her? Chances are she's just trying to be a good camgirl since so many people down right require all that extra attention.

Me, I don't even like PM'ing with people who are in my room so yeah. If I send even a brief pm it drastically affects my room but I'm a really bad multi tasker. I never say hello to a member unless they say hi to me first. when i break that rule, almost every time either the person leaves right away or it turns out they were away or having tech issues.

This is just a random post of lots of perspectives to keep in mind. As a secret tipping member, I REALLY don't like being bothered when I'm not in a models room. It feels disrespectful to the model I am watching. that's something I as a model have carried with me and now if a member isn't in my room, messaging him feels very much like I'm intruding on another models time.

 

[JerryBoBerry]

This thread really shows the DRASTIC difference in member opinions when it comes to PM's, and why models get paranoid. On one hand, lot's of members will think less of you immediately and maybe never visit again if you PM them when they are not in your room
<<snip snip>>
This is just a random post of lots of perspectives to keep in mind. As a secret tipping member, I REALLY don't like being bothered when I'm not in a models room. It feels disrespectful to the model I am watching. that's something I as a model have carried with me and now if a member isn't in my room, messaging him feels very much like I'm intruding on another models time.

For me PM's are fine, but there is a sliding scale where they become too much.

First, if a model (or member) wants to PM me to chat or ask a question, I'm fine with it. I have my PM's open to everybody and have never considered it to be a problem. I like chatting. All good.

Then once in a while I'll get the occasional PM asking me to check out her cam because she wanted to make sure it was working, not lagging, color setup was okay...things like that. I'm happy to do that, but it does put me a little on guard though. Once or twice and I'm left with the feeling she trusts me enough to help out with a minor problem. Repeated requests like that and I start to figure that's just her way of trying to get me into the room without downright asking for tips.

A little worse than that is the ones where I've been in their room just a very few times. I don't really know them that well, maybe just saw a show once or twice and happened to have tipped. Then I start getting PM's every freaking time she gets online, or is about to go group, letting me know she's there and to come visit. The odds are I would have stopped by again without that happening, but it pretty much kills the mood.

Then pretty much at the end of the scale I've had the random PM's from models I've never seen telling me to come to their room for good times, privates are open...basically trying to poach members from other rooms they are guesting in. Now I admit it has worked a couple times with me. But they were ones who sort of passed a test. When I get those random begging PM's I'll strike up a conversation in PM without going in their room. Ask them how it's going, what their day has been like. Things like that, just normal chit chat. If they actually chat back I'm more likely to go visit. I figure I'm on there to socialize, that's about the same result, just a different method of getting there. But if they don't reply or respond with anything other than more begging or those stupid 'kiss' emotes then it goes no further. In 5 years so far, two models got me to go to their room from a cold call PM.


This is my most hated emote on mfc. Use it the first time you ever PM me and odds are you get on my ignore list immediately. I've lost track of how many times I've been messaged with this by people about to ask for tokens.

 

[yummybrownfox]

It's the fact that the model had the audacity to initiate a PM conversation begging him for tokens. Yes, I consider it "begging" if it really went down as he described it. Justjoinedtopost may not have even planned on visiting that model's room. But she saw that he was online, and decided to send him a message pretty much guilt-tripping him into stopping by her room to tip.

If he had been the one to initiate a PM conversation and asked her "Hey, how's it going?," and she responded with "Not good. I'm having a bad night on MFC," that would've been fine because she'd just be answering his question truthfully.

I can think of other instances where it's perfectly fine to ask a specific member for tokens (like when a member already in the room is saying "Looks like I got here just in time! Yes, bb. Why don't you take it ALL off?"). In justjoinedtopost's situation, what the model did was in poor taste.

 

[justjoinedtopost]

It's the fact that the model had the audacity to initiate a PM conversation begging him for tokens. Yes, I consider it "begging" if it really went down as he described it. Justjoinedtopost may not have even planned on visiting that model's room. But she saw that he was online, and decided to send him a message pretty much guilt-tripping him into stopping by her room to tip.

Pretty much exactly how it went down.

Now sometimes an unsolicited "Hi!" makes me feel guilty, or pressured or whatever, but in this model's case, I felt slightly elated to find out she was on. Probly would have went to her busiest room and hung out for a bit, and if nothing was happening there, another skype. Now, if I run across a spare tin cup lying around the house, I might send her that, but that's about it.

As I said, she's very intelligent. Gorgeous. She sent me a video link showing her modelling in a fashion show, and she was the standout. It boggles my mind that she would stoop to begging.

 

[JoleneBrody]

Just in case anyone thought otherwise, my post was part of the continued conversation and in no way was commenting on the OP.

 

[justjoinedtopost]

Just in case anyone thought otherwise, my post was part of the continued conversation and in no way was commenting on the OP.

Well, I think the consensus is, that while the whole pm/do not pm is a grey area, the "Give me tokens pleasssseee" is about as classy as asking for a free flash.

 

[ANA_K]

I really have no problem with this. I consider it like a shopkeeper saying hello when you walk into his/her store, I don't feel it is putting pressure on me to buy but it is a little positive that might make me buy. It is basically good business no matter what your line of work. If I go into the same store all the time and usually buy something and the shopkeeper ignores me when I walk in that is a negative to me

Yeah, if you come into my chat, I will say hello but I'm not going to chase you down the street while you're "shopping" somewhere else.

 

[barbeque]

From the discussion it's pretty clear that there's an entire spectrum of possible responses, including a possible response by a member to really go in and throw tokens at the model. Although no one has admitted to it, I doubt the models would be doing it if it didn't work at least some of the time or once in a while.

Just a thought for justjoinedtopost, though. If every other interaction you have had with her is inconsistent with begging, you are then faced with 2 possibilities:
1. the interactions you have had with her up till now has been a façade, and this is the real her
2. there has been some misunderstanding and she was being ironic/ joking around

 

[justjoinedtopost]

From the discussion it's pretty clear that there's an entire spectrum of possible responses, including a possible response by a member to really go in and throw tokens at the model. Although no one has admitted to it, I doubt the models would be doing it if it didn't work at least some of the time or once in a while.

Just a thought for justjoinedtopost, though. If every other interaction you have had with her is inconsistent with begging, you are then faced with 2 possibilities:
1. the interactions you have had with her up till now has been a façade, and this is the real her
2. there has been some misunderstanding and she was being ironic/ joking around

Definitely number 1. Not really the joking around type.

 

[yummybrownfox]

there's an entire spectrum of possible responses, including a possible response by a member to really go in and throw tokens at the model.

Bad idea. Like Amber said earlier in the thread, this would be reinforcing the bad behavior. Don't do that.