Do you thnk it would be wrong for a guy to date his sister's ex-girlfriend?

[Guy]

This is a question that popped into my mind a few minutes ago when I was reading about dating.
Would a guy doing that be wrong In your opinion?

 

[MDouble00]

For clarification purposes. Do you mean a guy starts dating his sister's ex BFF/ or some other level of close friendship. Or do you mean that a guy starts dating his sister's actual former significant other? Both concepts come with issues but of different degrees.

 

[CurvyJ]

Yes.

 

[LaceyRoyce]

Guy !! This was such a well phrased thread. Thank you for explaining where the question came from and the context.

I don't think its wrong unless there was some huge issue (abuse or something) tiday put the "ex" ..the. some families are closer than others.... I haven't even met half of my siblings spouses!

 

[Guy]

For clarification purposes. Do you mean a guy starts dating his sister's ex BFF/ or some other level of close friendship. Or do you mean that a guy starts dating his sister's actual former significant other? Both concepts come with issues but of different degrees.

Former partner.

 

[SMuser69]

Former partner.

So the ex is bisexual and not lesbian in this scenario? Or is this person turning a queer person straight?

 

[Guy]

So the ex is bisexual and not lesbian in this scenario? Or is this person turning a queer person straight?

Ex is bisexual. I know that people cant change their sexual orientation.

 

[Ann_Sulu]

Not wrong but I but they would probably get a lot of awkward and likely many frustrating conversations.

I've known siblings who've dated a former partner of the other. I remember them getting teased for it and asked very uncomfortable personal questions.

"Were you thinking about her/him while dating the other?"

"Can you feel comfortable knowing they kissed or maybe even had sex?"

Those were hetero relationships. Though people are more open-minded with LGBTQ, I know from stupid personal questions I get asked about my own orientation that people will eventually very likely ask a question like:

"So is she straight, gay or confused?"

Speaking as a woman who's dated men and women, and had an ex boyfriend who felt weird around my female friends after I said I was into both...I can imagine it would be a rough time if he gets questions on if she's into the other sibling more.

I mean I know straight situations like that where a person was asked which sibling they found more attractive. I'm sure it would be more frustrating to have someone not merely compare appearances/personalities but sexual orientation to boot.

 

[ElaySmith]

I think it depends on the situation. If they were a couple for a few months and just decided that the relationship ran it course and split on good terms then maybe it would be okay depending on the relationship between the siblings. If it was a long term relationship I think it may be best to find anybody else.

 

[SatanJonez]

I feel like in the long run, it would be asking for more drama and trouble than it's probably worth if the person plans to turn it into a long-term thing. However, if the sister is cool with it then I guess I can't really say there's a problem, it's just not something I would personally do.

 

[Nikola Tesla]

I dated a woman who ended up marrying her sister's ex-husband.

Do you think that is wrong @Guy ?

 

[Useful-Title]

In my family, this would be a no-no. Unless they are cool with it. But I come from a close knit family.

So there is my 2 cents.

 

[Deleted member 37064]

Good on ya to describe more on the question, Guy.

but, ya really come up with some funky scenarios. I'm almost afraid to ask how/why this particular one came up...

 

[Bocefish]

If the sister has any sort of issue with it then it's a no-go imo. If it's ok with her, then full steam ahead.

 

[Guy]

Yes.

Why?

 

[yummybrownfox]

I know that I wouldn’t feel right dating a guy that my lil’ sis had previously dated. I would feel like I’m betraying her...plus that’d be awkward for me and her. One of her exes had the audacity to message me on FB, saying “When I was with your sister, I couldn’t keep my eyes off you.” Wtf.

Besides, I thought it was like some unwritten rule that you don’t get with the same man/woman that your friend (or family member) had been with.

 

[SaffronBurke]

In my family, yes, but mostly because my sisters and I are all adults, and our brother is in middle school. My youngest sister is 14 years older than him.

 

[THE MOLLIE MARIE]

With all the billions of people on this planet, why would you choose that one?

 

[ThyHeadLackethShoe]

I wouldn't consider it morally wrong but it does seem a bit too Jerry Springer. Make a small switch and add a pregnancy and you'd have vintage Springer.

 

[Guy]

I wouldn't consider it morally wrong but it does seem a bit too Jerry Springer. Make a small switch and add a pregnancy and you'd have vintage Springer.

That show was voted the worst TV show.

 

[THE MOLLIE MARIE]

That show was voted the worst TV show.

Which is exactly why this scenario seems so, uh, out there. Full of likely unnecessary drama, lots of "wtf why would you do that?"

 

[Deleted member 37064]

Which is exactly why this scenario seems so, uh, out there. Full of likely unnecessary drama, lots of "wtf why would you do that?"

Yet, people put themselves into those kinds of situations all the time.

 

[Lelo1]

I use to know some siblings & their friends who did pass around Xs. There were very much open and honest about it. It was really up to the person who dated the X first to offer their X.

Do you think it would be wrong for a guy to date his sister's ex-girlfriend?

Relationships with siblings tend to be some of the strongest and longest lasting friendships you can have in a lifetime. They can be very unique and special. Family can support you in ways almost no one else will. And that's not easily replaced. Why risk loosing that friendship. Why risk having your family disown you.

Ex is bisexual. I know that people cant change their sexual orientation.

Some one can be gay, and still fuck some one of the opposite gender. Regardless of gender, gender identity, or sexual orientation, I would personally be questioning if it's a revenge fucking. When some one really wants to hurt some one, some times they decide fucking their X's best friend, family member, partner is the thing to do.

 

[Bocefish]

I wouldn't consider it morally wrong but it does seem a bit too Jerry Springer. Make a small switch and add a pregnancy and you'd have vintage Springer.

Isn't Maury the new "Who's yer Daddy" blood test/lie detector king of incestual cousins and mothers that sleep with their daughter's fiance'... go to guy?

Can't help but wonder what type of "dating" site the op was reading for this type of scenario to pop into his mind.

On a side note, this thread reminded me of a radio station that makes prank phone calls on the behalf of others that want to play practical jokes...

Anyway, this guy had the radio station call his fiance' while pretending to be the doctor's office... to inform her the blood tests they took revealed that they were not only related, but second cousins. The bride to be gave a long pause after hearing the news then was quite adamant the lab made a mistake.

Before it got too far, they revealed it was just a prank set up by the fiance'. She was a good sport and is probably plotting some sinister revenge prank, lol.

 

[Guy]

Isn't Maury the new "Who's yer Daddy" blood test/lie detector king of incestual cousins and mothers that sleep with their daughter's fiance'... go to guy?

Can't help but wonder what type of "dating" site the op was reading for this type of scenario to pop into his mind.

On a side note, this thread reminded me of a radio station that makes prank phone calls on the behalf of others that want to play practical jokes...

Anyway, this guy had the radio station call his fiance' while pretending to be the doctor's office... to inform her the blood tests they took revealed that they were not only related, but second cousins. The bride to be gave a long pause after hearing the news then was quite adamant the lab made a mistake.

Before it got too far, they revealed it was just a prank set up by the fiance'. She was a good sport and is probably plotting some sinister revenge prank, lol.

I thought The Steve Wilkos Show was the one with the lie detector tests.

 

[IsabellaSnow]

Wrong? Might be going a bit far assuming the break up was clean and your sibling has long since moved on....

Would you reasonably be able to expect your sibling would not be upset/mad or that it might ruin your relationship with them? Nope.

I think the only person you could ask in that situation would be the sibling. Something along the lines of "you're long since broken up with this person and I know it's weird but I really like them and feel it could go somewhere. Would it be a huge issue for you if I pursued this?". Then you'd wait patiently for their response and make your decision based on their answer. You might still go against their wishes, but at least they had a heads up and you know where you stand.
I'm a believer that past a certain degree it's hard to help who you fall in love with. Sometimes there is just a serious connection between people. That might also be due to the proximity you had with this person. It's not that surprising that siblings would be attracted to similar people though, or even that similar people would find you both attractive. Then again, you could also find these attractions are due to your relationship with your sibling rather than the other person. Maybe respect for their taste, envy, wanting to follow in their steps.

 

[Dan Epstein]

Okay, here comes a rotten tomato:
I dated my brother’s wife a few years before she became religious and they met. Was their wedding weird? Hell yes. Being me is a task in itself it appears. I wish I had Guy’s luxury to play imaginary scenarios in my head, but in my case, reality played weird games on me

 

[LilyPink]

I have a similar question! Is it wrong to fuck my best friends ex?

 

[SaffronBurke]

I have a similar question! Is it wrong to fuck my best friends ex?

Some people insist that you never sleep with/date a friend's ex, but that seems to be something you hear from straight dudes who feel weird about "my dick being where his dick has been", never mind that condoms exist and the vagina is self-cleaning.

Personally, I think it depends on the situation - if the breakup was amicable and they're on good terms, and it was a while ago, it's probably not going to be a big deal. If they're on bad terms, it might look like the ex is "getting revenge" with you, especially if it was recent. Even if it was amicable, if it was pretty recent, it can come across as if you were just waiting to snatch them up.

 

[SaffronBurke]

Isn't Maury the new "Who's yer Daddy" blood test/lie detector king of incestual cousins and mothers that sleep with their daughter's fiance'... go to guy?

I thought The Steve Wilkos Show was the one with the lie detector tests.

Jerry, Maury, and Steve all run three-ring white trash circuses. Jerry is a lot of shock-factor "my mom fucked my brother! My sister fucked my boyfriend! Zomg my "straight" partner is cheating on me with someone of their gender!" and a lot of nudity, plus people coming out as gay/trans because GASP SHOCK OH NO. Maury is "who the daddy?" with some lie detectors to find out if people cheated or not. I don't know much about Steve aside from that he started out as a bouncer on Jerry Springer, then got his own show because reasons?

I don't truly understand the appeal of watching all of this, being white trash myself, but it seems to be pretty popular entertainment amongst other members of the garbage heap, so who knows? I can literally watch fights like this in person by just going to the right part of town, maybe other people don't have that level of live entertainment?