Brand spankin new with a lot of questions

[printedpixie]

Okay, this may be a little lengthy. I have been through a solid 15 pages on this forum and would just love some advice.
These are my concerns/worries:
here goes.. okay so i am suuuperr new to camming (and i guess a lot of things sexually speaking). I made an account on streamates but I haven't even done the free chat because I was just trying to read up on everything first and also just anxious. I guess I'm just getting a little doubtful on if I should even pursue this. I am financially hurting and I thought doing this could help, as well as maybe give me some confidence. I mean I know I'm kinda cute (or at least some people's cup of tea i.e tattoos, petite, submissive.. i.e kinda basic i guess) lol but my self esteem is rather low. I feel like people will just see right through me.
I'll lay it out, I am pretty shy until I get to know people, I'm not completely silent or anything and I do my best to keep conversations but I'm very far from a social butterfly and I suppose I feel a little awkward at times when it's hard to make conversation. And It's not that I don't like sex or masturbating or anything, I just feel like I have a lower libido than other women my age and that may be a problem.
Which leads me to what the f*** do I even do? Do I talk, just type? I see a lot of girls just sitting in front of their computer (I'm assuming for the free chat). And that leads me to just some other questions about paid chats.. is it just one person in there with you, multiple people? How much or little do you show/do in free chat, paid chat and gold? What to do if conversation doesn't flow? How much to charge for any of the tiers (paid, exclusive or gold?) Also, I'm not very good at being your typical sexy.. I don't know how to talk dirty, tease or even be flirty!
I think it's the specifics that I'm getting hung up on.

TLDR: I know I'm overthinking a lot. But i honestly don't know if I'm cut out for this. It's completely okay if i'm not, I've kind of accepted it. I guess I would just rather voice my worries and see what other people think before I go head first into something I'm not prepared for or cut out to do.

Sorry if this is not in the right forum and for being lengthy and sad. I appreciate any feedback and admire the hell out of y'all

 

[MarieElise]

Okay, this may be a little lengthy. I have been through a solid 15 pages on this forum and would just love some advice.
These are my concerns/worries:
here goes.. okay so i am suuuperr new to camming (and i guess a lot of things sexually speaking). I made an account on streamates but I haven't even done the free chat because I was just trying to read up on everything first and also just anxious. I guess I'm just getting a little doubtful on if I should even pursue this. I am financially hurting and I thought doing this could help, as well as maybe give me some confidence. I mean I know I'm kinda cute (or at least some people's cup of tea i.e tattoos, petite, submissive.. i.e kinda basic i guess) lol but my self esteem is rather low. I feel like people will just see right through me.
I'll lay it out, I am pretty shy until I get to know people, I'm not completely silent or anything and I do my best to keep conversations but I'm very far from a social butterfly and I suppose I feel a little awkward at times when it's hard to make conversation. And It's not that I don't like sex or masturbating or anything, I just feel like I have a lower libido than other women my age and that may be a problem.
Which leads me to what the f*** do I even do? Do I talk, just type? I see a lot of girls just sitting in front of their computer (I'm assuming for the free chat). And that leads me to just some other questions about paid chats.. is it just one person in there with you, multiple people? How much or little do you show/do in free chat, paid chat and gold? What to do if conversation doesn't flow? How much to charge for any of the tiers (paid, exclusive or gold?) Also, I'm not very good at being your typical sexy.. I don't know how to talk dirty, tease or even be flirty!
I think it's the specifics that I'm getting hung up on.

TLDR: I know I'm overthinking a lot. But i honestly don't know if I'm cut out for this. It's completely okay if i'm not, I've kind of accepted it. I guess I would just rather voice my worries and see what other people think before I go head first into something I'm not prepared for or cut out to do.

Sorry if this is not in the right forum and for being lengthy and sad. I appreciate any feedback and admire the hell out of y'all

I would not do this if I did not have a high sex drive and enjoy being sexual, admired, flirty, and outgoing with men. It is a tough business, which requires thick skin.

If you think you could potentially enjoy being sexual and teasing, and find a more outgoing side of yourself, then I would say try it.

If you are purely just needing money, I would say don't. In that case, it would be more likely you would end up traumatized, bitter, and completely freaked out. Plus you could end up being one of those models who come here repeatedly complaining that they make no money, no matter what they do, and they don't know why.

However, like I said if you feel like this could build your esteem, and help you to get in touch with your sexuality, and that sounds fun to you, then that would be different. If that sounds repulsive to you, then; no - it's not a good idea. Remember illegal tapings happen and freak people out for years afterward, about them being on tube sites. So unless this is something they really want to do, I would not recommend it. However, you could also do a complete turnaround too, and love it.

If you try to base your esteem and confidence on how much you make or how busy you are, then you are heading for depression. Because we go through quiet phases, especially in the first year or 2, and you cannot let them make you feel bad about yourself. However, a lot of models do. So I think it's really good you are being so thoughtful and open to discussing it first, without jumping right in.

On SM you don't have to be as entertaining or as social as on token sites, but men will want to see you be sexual with toys, or at least with dirty talk. Hope that helps. I don't think penetration is required, but I think you would want to be able to emit and communicate a certain level of sexuality, enjoyment and sensuality.

ETA; Overall after years of being on cam model forums, and reading a lot about other new models' experiences, I would say that the models who come to this business out of desperation don't seem to fare as well (in general). Whereas the models who plan for months, have other part time jobs, and can afford the basic equipment, seem to do a little better. It requires a lot of patience to start out with. It's not as easy money as some of the other sex work jobs out there (which I have actually tried myself in the past, so I do know a little about them from real world experience). Stripping is really tough too, but some of the other SW not so much ime. What I am trying to say is that camming can be a really tough field, and unless you get super lucky right off the bat, huge amounts of money don't start flowing in.

 

[InannahQoH]

FYI im not a model.
I'm a viewer/user, who will stream Anime later, and am helping a model start streaming atm.


I think if you do a show, your video's and photos will be everywhere on the net forever.
So i dont think there is any "I'll do a show and see how things go".

So i think its more, a decision, is this what you want to do long term, in which case the more video's and photos around the net, the better, as its all advertising for you.
Or not, in which case don't bother starting.

And then, I personally wouldn't want to start streaming without a lovense lush 3 for ~$120
Gives you and viewers something to do at all times. And is a good income source.

Perhaps EPLAY would be a better site for you?
It has less rules, and less models on it, with it being new.
For example, you could just load a computer game and play it..
Then take tips for topless, ETC So you have something to do while waiting for tips, etc.

I think theres two reasons users tip models with a Lush, to tease them, and to annoy them.
I mean..
If the phone rings, and the models on an important call,
Thats when the tips for the Lush3 fire up a lot, to annoy her with making her squirm, while shes trying to have a phone call. ETC ETC

It can be similar with Gaming as well, Viewers wanting to tip your Lush, to make you squirm, while you are trying to play.
While the viewers try to get you killed in game by making you squirm.,


Lots of girls make something work, and each with their own style and different way.
I think you need to work out which style and how you want to tackle this, commit to it, then get on with it.
Or .. not.

Good luck, Hugs.

 

[Violet Dawn]

I'm probably going to be a little brutally honest but, when I first started webcamming I was a lot like you.

Financially desperate, not necessarily insecure overall, but but definitely not booming with confidence. Shit social skills. Not comfortable with my sexuality. I thought that webcamming might make me more outgoing and self confident and that I'd make money doing it.

Well, it didn't. It actually exaggerated my insecurities, and it showed me all sorts of negative sides of me I didn't know I had. They were not good ones. It created a whole set of insecurities I didn't know I had. I was super cute and had a wonderful personality which brought so many people in, but my mentally drove me into the mud, quick. I just have to say, if you are not 100% comfortable with yourself and your sexuality, I don't think it's the path for you. Because this job can fuck you up, if you don't have the right mindset.

 

[gotenks93]

This might be different for me cause I’m a guy, but I kind of felt the same when I started out. I did it for money and to boost my confidence. It has made me much more confident in my appearance as people just like to watch me and say nice things. Yes there are weirdos who make demands and say creepy things but I find it easy to ignore.

It’s entirely down to the type of person you are, how you handle criticism and the pressure of having a lot of eyes on you. I just enjoy the attention and meeting new people so if you think that sounds good you should go for it

 

[Trixxi_Love]

I think theres two reasons users tip models with a Lush, to tease them, and to annoy them.

My mind is blown. I never would have thought “annoy them” but you make a good case.

 

[InannahQoH]

My mind is blown. I never would have thought “annoy them” but you make a good case.

Yeah sorry, Mensa IQ, but failed English with 27%. "Annoy" isn't really the right word.
Cause it doesn't really "Annoy" her when you make her excited and are paying her..

Maybe the viewers being mischievous is better wording it..

Like for example.
East European model working for a studio.
Her manager comes in to discuss (I cant understand the language so don't know.)
Soon as the manager walks in and asks the model a question, the tips spam...
And then for 30 minutes the models left squirming around not able to answer the manager properly.
So the manager just has to stand there for 30 minutes waiting for an answer.. And the tips to slow down.
Manager finally leaves then its back to quiet again.

Model drops something then needs to go pick it up...

Model leaves to goto the toilet, Always got to get some big vibes happening, before she gets the lush out.

Phone rings, and she takes a call.

ETC ETC that sort of stuff.

Oh and remember due to lag ETC, tips can come in ~5 seconds afterwards, they intended to press the tip button.

 

[Mila_]

Well, hmmm I loved reading your OP because it has spark. You know there’s a lot of aspiring models and cambabies coming into the forum and asking for advice and their messages are always similar: bland, vacant, boring. Your post was a bit sad, a bit dramatic, sure, but also: cute, confessional, out of the ordinary. I felt identified and moved when I read it, because it conveyed there was definitely a human being behind the keyboard typing. So we, as a community, felt engaged and wanting to give you an answer. This is the one skill you need to be a successful camgirl. Vaginas and Lushes? Those are fine. To be a really successful camgirl the one skill you need is to have the capacity to make the audience feel things and see you, the person, not the nipple or the clit or the moaning. For this reason if you approach camming how you have approached this thread you are very likely to succeed.

If you are comfortable and willing I would love to take a look at your birth chart and do a tarot reading for you. You can cast your chart on Astro.com > free horoscopes > natal chart and ascendant. Take a screenshot of the wheel if you want and I’ll read it for you. We will see if this could be a good fit for you.

 

[printedpixie]

I'm probably going to be a little brutally honest but, when I first started webcamming I was a lot like you.

Financially desperate, not necessarily insecure overall, but but definitely not booming with confidence. Shit social skills. Not comfortable with my sexuality. I thought that webcamming might make me more outgoing and self confident and that I'd make money doing it.

Well, it didn't. It actually exaggerated my insecurities, and it showed me all sorts of negative sides of me I didn't know I had. They were not good ones. It created a whole set of insecurities I didn't know I had. I was super cute and had a wonderful personality which brought so many people in, but my mentally drove me into the mud, quick. I just have to say, if you are not 100% comfortable with yourself and your sexuality, I don't think it's the path for you. Because this job can fuck you up, if you don't have the right mindset.

Did it ever work out for you? Or you just realized it wasn't a path meant for you?
I think I''m leaning more towards this side. Doesn't mean I failed, well because i didn't try lol but simply, i'm just not cut out for it and that's okay. Thank you so much for the honesty!

 

[printedpixie]

If you try to base your esteem and confidence on how much you make or how busy you are, then you are heading for depression.

I'll be honest, I already suffer with some depression and this probably wouldn't help. Not that i base my self worth or anything on things like that but when you're a little fragile emotionally then yeah doing this kind of work probably isn't the best idea.

I would say that the models who come to this business out of desperation don't seem to fare as well (in general).

Also, this! I think I probably was going to try to go about it in the wrong way.

Anyway I really appreciate your honesty! and I think you're absolutely right. But hey, maybe down the road, I'll see if i feel any different! Thank you

 

[printedpixie]

FYI im not a model.
I'm a viewer/user, who will stream Anime later, and am helping a model start streaming atm.


I think if you do a show, your video's and photos will be everywhere on the net forever.
So i dont think there is any "I'll do a show and see how things go".

So i think its more, a decision, is this what you want to do long term, in which case the more video's and photos around the net, the better, as its all advertising for you.
Or not, in which case don't bother starting.

And then, I personally wouldn't want to start streaming without a lovense lush 3 for ~$120
Gives you and viewers something to do at all times. And is a good income source.

Perhaps EPLAY would be a better site for you?
It has less rules, and less models on it, with it being new.
For example, you could just load a computer game and play it..
Then take tips for topless, ETC So you have something to do while waiting for tips, etc.

I think theres two reasons users tip models with a Lush, to tease them, and to annoy them.
I mean..
If the phone rings, and the models on an important call,
Thats when the tips for the Lush3 fire up a lot, to annoy her with making her squirm, while shes trying to have a phone call. ETC ETC

It can be similar with Gaming as well, Viewers wanting to tip your Lush, to make you squirm, while you are trying to play.
While the viewers try to get you killed in game by making you squirm.,


Lots of girls make something work, and each with their own style and different way.
I think you need to work out which style and how you want to tackle this, commit to it, then get on with it.
Or .. not.

Good luck, Hugs.

I was thinking about the lovense too, but honestly i don't have the money for that right now. but like i said in another reply.. maybe down the road when i'm in a different head space this could work out. It was just nice to hear other peoples thoughts, kinda confirming a decision I was already leaning towards. Thank you! Hugs to you too

 

[printedpixie]

Well, hmmm I loved reading your OP because it has spark. You know there’s a lot of aspiring models and cambabies coming into the forum and asking for advice and their messages are always similar: bland, vacant, boring. Your post was a bit sad, a bit dramatic, sure, but also: cute, confessional, out of the ordinary. I felt identified and moved when I read it, because it conveyed there was definitely a human being behind the keyboard typing. So we, as a community, felt engaged and wanting to give you an answer. This is the one skill you need to be a successful camgirl. Vaginas and Lushes? Those are fine. To be a really successful camgirl the one skill you need is to have the capacity to make the audience feel things and see you, the person, not the nipple or the clit or the moaning. For this reason if you approach camming how you have approached this thread you are very likely to succeed.

If you are comfortable and willing I would love to take a look at your birth chart and do a tarot reading for you. You can cast your chart on Astro.com > free horoscopes > natal chart and ascendant. Take a screenshot of the wheel if you want and I’ll read it for you. We will see if this could be a good fit for you.

Thank you for this I do think that is one thing I could bring to the table, which does give me some confidence. But I think I've kind of decided what I want to do. However, if you just feel like reading a birth chart haha then I would love to hear about it! I don't know much about all of that, but always interested

 

[Violet Dawn]

Well, hmmm I loved reading your OP because it has spark. You know there’s a lot of aspiring models and cambabies coming into the forum and asking for advice and their messages are always similar: bland, vacant, boring. Your post was a bit sad, a bit dramatic, sure, but also: cute, confessional, out of the ordinary. I felt identified and moved when I read it, because it conveyed there was definitely a human being behind the keyboard typing. So we, as a community, felt engaged and wanting to give you an answer. This is the one skill you need to be a successful camgirl. Vaginas and Lushes? Those are fine. To be a really successful camgirl the one skill you need is to have the capacity to make the audience feel things and see you, the person, not the nipple or the clit or the moaning. For this reason if you approach camming how you have approached this thread you are very likely to succeed.

If you are comfortable and willing I would love to take a look at your birth chart and do a tarot reading for you. You can cast your chart on Astro.com > free horoscopes > natal chart and ascendant. Take a screenshot of the wheel if you want and I’ll read it for you. We will see if this could be a good fit for you.

You can find your potential based on your natal chart?

 

[Mila_]

You can find your potential based on your natal chart?

Absolutely... you can learn which areas will be more challenging and which areas you are naturally gifted or lucky at. This doesn't mean if you find something is challenging that you wouldn't succeed at it, it just means you will learn lessons through the school of hard knocks doing it

 

[MarieElise]

@printedpixie getting a birth chart reading from Mila is a really good idea, and I think will give you the most valuable information on this. Because it really could go either way, as you can see from the responses.

 

[Violet Dawn]

Did it ever work out for you? Or you just realized it wasn't a path meant for you?
I think I''m leaning more towards this side. Doesn't mean I failed, well because i didn't try lol but simply, i'm just not cut out for it and that's okay. Thank you so much for the honesty!

It definitely has the older I got, because with age I gained a lot of self esteem and confidence.

I started when I was just about to turn 20. And I just simply wasn't mentally ready until now (I'm 26)

 

[Mila_]

It definitely has the older I got, because with age I gained a lot of self esteem and confidence.

I started when I was just about to turn 20. And I just simply wasn't mentally ready until now (I'm 26)

This is interesting.. I feel like camming def helped me gain a lot of confidence and taught me to set boundaries on and off cam which I struggled with. But I started camming in my late 20s, maybe there is a correlation

 

[Violet Dawn]

This is interesting.. I feel like camming def helped me gain a lot of confidence and taught me to set boundaries on and off cam which I struggled with. But I started camming in my late 20s, maybe there is a correlation

It has definitely helped build the confidence I already had when I started again being older. But when I was younger it kinda showed me a lot of traits I had I guess I wasn't ready to accept. :/