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50 shades of lol
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These are so over the top ridiculous I cant stop laughing.
This is the one it gave me . . . .
"When he removed his spam javelin from my chocolate starfish, he was pleasantly surprised to see a corn-eyed butt snake staring back as him. He knew I couldn't wait to gobble the hardened fudge nugget off his greasy slimelight. The thrusting makes me spout my clunge gunge all over his muffbuster. I awoke the next morning with my gaping slime hole still leaching. I thought it was over but his slut slayer had other ideas. Leaving my panties sunny side up on the floor was the least of my worries as his blood-engorged mayonnaise cannon shoved deeper into my rusty bullet hole. The unrelenting orgasms from his thrill drill slamming my crusty fuck trench made me come so hard, I began sweating like a pregnant nun."
This is the one it gave me . . . .
"When he removed his spam javelin from my chocolate starfish, he was pleasantly surprised to see a corn-eyed butt snake staring back as him. He knew I couldn't wait to gobble the hardened fudge nugget off his greasy slimelight. The thrusting makes me spout my clunge gunge all over his muffbuster. I awoke the next morning with my gaping slime hole still leaching. I thought it was over but his slut slayer had other ideas. Leaving my panties sunny side up on the floor was the least of my worries as his blood-engorged mayonnaise cannon shoved deeper into my rusty bullet hole. The unrelenting orgasms from his thrill drill slamming my crusty fuck trench made me come so hard, I began sweating like a pregnant nun."
AliciaLeigh
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Oh my goodness...
“There was baby gravy leaching from his trouser bowser and I was wetter than a well diggers arse. We were ready for more. I awoke the next morning with my furry cup still oozing. I thought it was over but his chorizo howitzer had other ideas. The feeling of his love mayonnaise flowing down my throat got my clunge gunge flowing quicker than greased shit off a shiny shovel. With my flappy meal now much like a werewolf with it's throat cut, he thought it was time to start shoving my old dirt road. Is now the time to tell him I really need to roll a footlong fudge bullet, I wondered? After having my stench trench hammered, he then proceeded to fuck my cocoa channel."
“There was baby gravy leaching from his trouser bowser and I was wetter than a well diggers arse. We were ready for more. I awoke the next morning with my furry cup still oozing. I thought it was over but his chorizo howitzer had other ideas. The feeling of his love mayonnaise flowing down my throat got my clunge gunge flowing quicker than greased shit off a shiny shovel. With my flappy meal now much like a werewolf with it's throat cut, he thought it was time to start shoving my old dirt road. Is now the time to tell him I really need to roll a footlong fudge bullet, I wondered? After having my stench trench hammered, he then proceeded to fuck my cocoa channel."
Nordling
V.I.P. AmberLander
"Hours of plowing like this would leave any girl's lunchmeat looking like Brian May's plughole, and I was no different! It was bliss having his battering ram probed inside me again; stuffing my smush mitten with a number of chillies just didn't get my chamber of squelch flooding like it used to. I can't wait to gobble the man fat from his vein cane. By now, my smush mitten was dribbling like a rabid dog. The mixture of stink pickle and cock snot in my turd-herder created the delicious sphincter sauce that he was so fond of."
Lintilla
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If it's really this bad... I'm going to have to give in and read this thing. Just like I read Twilight before it. It's already on my phone's reader, just haven't been able to bring myself to do it yet. But erotica borne of Twilight fan-fiction HAS to be so bad it's good, right?
The unrelenting orgasms from his pink tractor beam slamming my gaping slime hole made me come so hard, I began sweating like a blind lesbian in a fish shop. It was bliss having his wensleydale wand probed inside me again; stuffing my smush mitten with a number of chillies just didn't get my chlamydia canal flowing like it used to. My cake hole was so full of tenderloin truncheon and cock custard, the love piss was sliming down my chin and onto my fiery biscuits. By now, my gaping clam cavern was seeping like a slug in a salt mine. Inserting a gerbil into my hairy spunk dungeon got me gushing clunge gunge faster than snot off a whip.
' began sweating like a blind lesbian in a fish shop.' :laughing-rolling:
' began sweating like a blind lesbian in a fish shop.' :laughing-rolling:
“Within no time, I could feel the shitty Da Vinci load frothing from my other vagina and all over my vertical smile. The slamming of my vintage golf bag was so vigorous, he soon found his sperm factories joining his cheese-crusted cock deep in my ring piece. He munched on my panty hamster, even though I'd been up on bricks for the best part of a week. There was baby gravy leaching from his timed slimer and I was wetter than a spastic's chin. We were ready for more. I awoke the next morning with my penis pothole still seeping. I thought it was over but his balony pony had other ideas.
”
Haha. Thanks for the laugh!
”
Haha. Thanks for the laugh!
“It was bliss having his spam dagger shoved inside me again; stuffing my wizards sleeve with a number of chillies just didn't get my gaping clam cavern spouting like it used to. When he removed his washington monument from my fudge factory, he was pleasantly surprised to see a hardened fudge nugget staring back as him. He knew I couldn't wait to chow down on the hardened fudge nugget off his chubstep. With his tenderloin truncheon hammering deep into my vaginal bacon buffet, the sensation of his spam dagger smashing my cervix made me quiver like a rat on acid. With my clap flaps now much like John Wayne's saddlebags, he thought it was time to start plunging my turd cutter. Is now the time to tell him I really need to pitch a Mr. Hanky, I wondered? I can't wait to consume the creamy load from his bald avenger."
Anyone gonna own up to having "clap flaps now much like John Wayne's saddlebags"? :lol:
Anyone gonna own up to having "clap flaps now much like John Wayne's saddlebags"? :lol:
"My shame portal was trembling like Micheal J. Fox licking a car battery."
hahahaha, even i wouldn't say that
hahahaha, even i wouldn't say that
A
Anonymous
Guest
Red7227 said:"My shame portal was trembling like Micheal J. Fox licking a car battery."
hahahaha, even i wouldn't say that
:lol:
That's funny and messed up at the same time.
Michael's adorable.
"Ripped out fireplace" is now my favourite euphemism for pussaiiiii. I also adore the phrase "sweating like a pregnant nun".
“The mixture of colon cobra and love mayonnaise in my turd cutter created the delicious sphincter sauce that he was so fond of. Within no time, I could feel the shitty steamin' semen oozing from my turd-herder and all over my piss flaps. He curled a giant colon cobra on my love bubbles just so he could suck it up like a hungry hungry hippo. I awoke the next morning with my carp cavity still dripping. I thought it was over but his clunger had other ideas. My mouth was so full of brie baton and creamy load, the creamy load was haemorrhaging down my chin and onto my boobage."
Sweet Christmas!
Sweet Christmas!
“Within no time, I could feel the shitty baby gravy weeping from my rusty sherif's badge and all over my lunchmeat. I can't wait to gobble the steamin' semen from his skin flute. Now, I've seen more helmets than Hitler, but the sight of his cumtree made my pussy batter froth like a slavering dog. He munched on my flappy meal, even though I'd been surfing the crimson tide for the best part of a week."
:lol: flappy meal! sick, but funny.
:lol: flappy meal! sick, but funny.
I have been searching for some appropriate erotic literature to read to my room and this is the stuff of wet dreams! Def using this tonight! Thanks Jup!
:?
:?
TheFluffsta said:
I thought of you and your erotic story time (Jackoffanory?) when I saw this but forgot to link it to you.
I for one, look forward to hearing you talking about your "ripped out fireplace" :-D
I read one of them this afternoon! Absolutely hilarious and everyone loved it! Everyone that is except this disgruntled viewer...mynameisbob84 said:
:lol: :lol: :lol:
TheFluffsta said:
Some people will never know the delights of lubing their oozing spam javelin with greased weasel shit and overloading a wet birth cannon with frothing torrents of chunky cock snot... these people are prudes :?
Also, I inadvertently started a Fluffy FanClub called the Greased Weasel Shits. If anyone is interested teep 1000 and get your name on my profile and hate mail straight to your email address when I can be arsed.mynameisbob84 said:
The one was entirely win
“My soft-shelled tuna taco was trembling like jelly. The seemingly never-ending streams of magician's wax emanating from his jebend soon had me coated like a plasterer's radio. It was bliss having his wensleydale wand shoved inside me again; stuffing my wizards sleeve with a barbie doll just didn't get my south mouth spattering like it used to. The feeling of his love mayonnaise salivating down my throat got my tuna tunnel tears flowing quicker than greased shit off a shiny shovel. Hours of pounding like this would leave any girl's clap flaps looking like a ripped out fireplace, and I was no different! "
“My soft-shelled tuna taco was trembling like jelly. The seemingly never-ending streams of magician's wax emanating from his jebend soon had me coated like a plasterer's radio. It was bliss having his wensleydale wand shoved inside me again; stuffing my wizards sleeve with a barbie doll just didn't get my south mouth spattering like it used to. The feeling of his love mayonnaise salivating down my throat got my tuna tunnel tears flowing quicker than greased shit off a shiny shovel. Hours of pounding like this would leave any girl's clap flaps looking like a ripped out fireplace, and I was no different! "
I read the books, don't judge me--I'm already ashamed of myself.
These could all have been in the books and I wouldn't have even batted an eyelash because the whole thing is just so ridiculously over-the-top.
:lol:
These could all have been in the books and I wouldn't have even batted an eyelash because the whole thing is just so ridiculously over-the-top.
:lol:
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