Member tells me he could find me

[Carmen_Monroe]

Hi !

I‘m on Stripchat for a few weeks and already have a few Knights. One of them ,writes me yesterday following PM‘s:

„I have my options to find you ^^“

„but you don't need to panic now^^“

Honestly, he‘s a nice guy and he‘s helping me a lot. But i don’t know how i should feel about this messages.

 

[Marceline]

Someone who says something like that is not a nice or good person.

IMO, that message is either one of two things.

1. An awkward, terribly unfunny joke. Because seriously, who jokes about potentially stalking or doxxing a cam model? If this was just a joke, this dude is totally oblivious, and probably not someone you want hanging around.

2. A veiled threat and a way to manipulate you. He thinks you’ll have it in the back of your head that he can find you and that you will tiptoe around him or let him get away with shitty behavior since you’ll be afraid of what he could potentially do. Hence the “you don’t need to panic now” part. If this is the case, you need to block him immediately. Considering you said he has been helping a lot, I’m actually sort of leaning towards this, because the overly helpful type of member usually tends to be doing it for self gain. To garner extra favor with the model and/or to manipulate her into running her room how he wants it to be. Not saying all helpful members out there are like this, but I’ve come across a lot who are. And if he is already attempting to manipulate you in one way, it’s not that much of a stretch to think that message is just another manipulation technique.

And actually, here’s a third option. It wasn’t a joke or necessarily a threat. He said it to be like “Hey, I could do this incredibly shitty thing, but I won’t because I’m such a nice guy”. To make himself.... look better? However, anyone who thinks about doing shitty stuff like this, usually is a shitty person. It’s peak “r/niceguys”, and these people usually do end up doing the shitty things when they feel slighted in any way.

Idk, I’d personally ban this dude yesterday.

 

[AudriTwo]

wtf, thats creepy as hell. him even mentioning he can do that is totally boundary-crossing. he knows this because he told you not to panic. i'd ban him.

he could have already found your dox. which means he has been snooping. i'd lock down all your social media accounts or delete them entirely if you aren't out about your work.

 

[dark_mermaid]

Ban him. Are knights on stripchat what moderators are on chaturbate? Careful with these guys generally then.

 

[NotYou]

Ban him. Are knights on stripchat what moderators are on chaturbate? Careful with these guys generally then.

Yes. They actually seem a bit more entitled.
And to become a Knight you have to first buy the "unlimited membership2 which is the "VIP/premium" feature for £20 per month (lets you be invisible, PM models first, use emojis etc).
So these people are usually up themselves and think they are better than everyone else. Despite they may actually be a grey account, with the VIP, never spent a token in their life.

 

[dark_mermaid]

Funny. Getting called a (white) knight is not so positive anywhere else. On stripchat they made a whole category for them.

This guy will produce a lot of head trouble. I'm sure of it.

 

[Deleted member 37064]

This is really shitty behaviour from a member or moderator and is completely unacceptable. As others have said, ban/block and lock down all of your social media.

One of the mistakes many people do is use their personal mobile devices for business social media accounts on Instagram, Twitter, etc. The problem is that these programs hit your contact list and they've now crossed boundaries. I'm not sure if there's a way to redact this, aside from looking into the app and turning off the option of not having access to your contact list. The downside is that it's already been done, and I don't think it clears it. It's best to use a separate device (old phone or tablet for example) for your work social media work. Or, if you don't have one might be best to use a browser in privacy mode for these activities.

Hopefully nothing come of this, and it's just him being super creepy. A member should never cross the line and actively search for a model's location. It's different if the model feels they can be trusted with said knowledge and offers it up, even then still being careful so as to protect identity and specific locations. But, again, the recipient should respect boundaries.

 

[AmberCutie]

Honestly, he‘s a nice guy

Someone who says something like that is not a nice or good person.

 

[Carmen_Monroe]

I have now removed him as a knight and blocked him. I am now totally afraid that he will start to talk badly about me or to report me in an unjustified manner

 

[Nigerian Prince]

I have now removed him as a knight and blocked him. I am now totally afraid that he will start to talk badly about me or to report me in an unjustified manner

You should report him to the site as well.

 

[Deleted member 37064]

I have now removed him as a knight and blocked him. I am now totally afraid that he will start to talk badly about me or to report me in an unjustified manner

If you can, document any and all things he said or done and the date/times it's happened. If you have text of it in your chat rooms, take screen shots of it and keep them in a safe place in case you need to provide proof of why you took such actions. Or, as mentioned by @Nigerian Prince report if you feel it's warranted.

 

[yummybrownfox]

Hi !

I‘m on Stripchat for a few weeks and already have a few Knights. One of them ,writes me yesterday following PM‘s:

„I have my options to find you ^^“

„but you don't need to panic now^^“

Honestly, he‘s a nice guy and he‘s helping me a lot. But i don’t know how i should feel about this messages.

"I can stalk you, bb. But there's no need to worry! Just sayin...I CAN stalk you." Smh. That's pretty much what this scumbag is saying. He's not a nice guy.

Members who say things like this...or do that "Let's try to figure out what her REAL name is" bullshit in public chat...or say things in public chat ("Rebecca? Is that you?") to try to get you to slip up and accidentally blurt out your real name are SCUM. I don't care if he's your #1 tipper. This is not okay, and it's not good to keep members like this around. So it's good that you blocked him.

Keep reporting and blocking him if he continues to find you on other sites too. Some of these idiots don't even bother changing their screen name (or trying to hide their identity) when they hop from site to site trying to find you, so it's just makes it easier for you to figure out it's the same guy.

 

[NewYorker]

I'm one of those real helpful guys. It turned out it evolved into a job with a studio being a monitor and I also act like a moderator so models don't necessarily have to pick one they don't really know. I'm a Knight in Stripchat (there's no "white" in front of that) and I moderate/monitor (protect & train) upwards of 30 models in CB, Bonga, Camsoda, MFC and Cam4, so I know what I'm talking about when I say this particular user, apparently nice or not, is trouble. I would contact stripchat and request they block his IP and why. They are very responsive to this type of thing. Also, nothing will prevent this guy from opening multiple accounts to appear to be someone different. I always tell models never to divulge anything personal and always block the Country or State where they live. All it takes is 1 really smart, really crazy user with a little money to cause a world of trouble.

 

[Carmen_Monroe]

Before i blocked him , he wanted to tell me that it was all just a joke and that he never meant it seriously. I just told him that it wasn't funny and that it just crossed borders. He just said

“I'm sorry that was so bad for you, but it wasn't really meant that way. I always try to be fun. I never threatened you in my life, why should I? it doesn't do me any good. ”

So obviously he didn't understand how creepy and scary that was. I mean what sane person jokes about stalking someone? If he really would understand my point he would have said something like „Yeah your’e right, that was really an asshole-move from me, i’m sorry. I understand that it was scary for you“

But he said: „I‘m SorRy thAt iT wAs sO baD for yoUu“. Gaslighting at it’s finest.

So yeah i‘m totally glad that i blocked him. Before that creepy stuff happend ,he even sent me his cell phone number and offered me that I could always talk to him if I wanted to. When I did not respond to this, he pointed out his number several times until I clearly told him that I would not give out my private data.

 

[PrettyInPink1]

So obviously he didn't understand how creepy and scary that was. I mean what sane person jokes about stalking someone?

Answer: no sane person jokes about stalking anyone anywhere. That's how people can get arrested in real life.

 

[silentm0de]

What did you actually give him? What does he know about you? From an IT perspective, I can just say that he needs to be one hell of a hacker to actually find you. He could hack into a relevant database your camsite uses to store your data. And by hacking I do not necessearily mean the approach presented in TV shows or movies. If there is a possibility to do that at all, it would be via social hacking - he might work there himself, or maybe compromised a person who has access to your data. Social hacking is the most effective way to compromise any network - I am managing an 800 user network and that's what I fear most.
Another way is to compromise your PC or the device you're streaming from. If you had a technician repair it or something, or if anyone you don't know had access to your device - format your HDD/SSD, better use data shredder software and start from scratch. Even better, get a new SSD and destroy the old one.

Actually, this my most important advice: As you could also have been infected with some kind of rootkit, keylogger or backdoor/trojan software, I would NOT stream from this device again. If you have to turn it on, do so while offline! No ethernet cables, no Wifi! Get a new SSD/HDD, reinstall Windows or whatever OS you use. Do it yourself if possible. Have a person you TRUST configure a firewall (best if that's an extra device, like a hardware firewall. Your home router should be able to do that, if it's worth a penny) so it only allows packets/traffic relevant for streaming. Don't run unneccesary software while you stream. At the very least, monitor your network traffic to find out if there are things going on that you can't pinpoint to your streaming software.

Also, I hope you never gave him your phone number, you would be actually traceable. It is not easy for normal people, but you never know who you're dealing with. He might even work for some state organization having access to communication data.
Actually, I think this is just a blunder. All the things he could do to actually find you are highly illegal and require exquisite IT, programming and networking knowledge. I think he's just an asshole trying to scare you. Still, listen to me and get your streaming device in order. At the very least, REINSTALL from scratch. And use a fresh USB Drive to do it!!

Heed my advice and talk to someone who has experience with IT security!

 

[NotYou]

Before i blocked him , he wanted to tell me that it was all just a joke and that he never meant it seriously. I just told him that it wasn't funny and that it just crossed borders. He just said

“I'm sorry that was so bad for you, but it wasn't really meant that way. I always try to be fun. I never threatened you in my life, why should I? it doesn't do me any good. ”

So obviously he didn't understand how creepy and scary that was. I mean what sane person jokes about stalking someone? If he really would understand my point he would have said something like „Yeah your’e right, that was really an asshole-move from me, i’m sorry. I understand that it was scary for you“

But he said: „I‘m SorRy thAt iT wAs sO baD for yoUu“. Gaslighting at it’s finest.

So yeah i‘m totally glad that i blocked him. Before that creepy stuff happend ,he even sent me his cell phone number and offered me that I could always talk to him if I wanted to. When I did not respond to this, he pointed out his number several times until I clearly told him that I would not give out my private data.

"sorry that it's bad for you".
Doesn't make it sound to me like he is sorry for saying something so stupid and understanding why or how it's a bad thing to say. He didn't seem to acknowledge how bad or serious that kind of comment/thing is or can be.


@silentm0de in this day and age, all it takes is him to find a real social media, use any photos with buildings in it, then deduct further from there, or whatever. it's all so easy for creeps to do this kind of thing and you don't have to exactly be a whizz for it, even dumb guys can figure that shit out.

 

[CheeseMoon]

I think he's just an asshole trying to scare you.

What it reads like to me, so I'm thinking a full-on scorched earth with your online presence and your data should be a tiny bit farther down the list. Repeatedly trying to push your phone number on a model isn't exactly seasoned conman stuff, so he likely has neither the means nor the motivation to pull off rootkits, keyloggers and crap like that.

We all know guys like that; an insensitive dumb fucking asshole with poor judgement and even worse timing. Not a conman. Not a cat burglar. Not Matt Damon in Ocean's Eleven.

 

[Carmen_Monroe]

Thanks for your long answer! i always stream from my mac book pro and that has never been in other hands. I don’t have personal social media accounts. I didn't give him my cell phone number, all he knows is which country I'm from, otherwise of course I didn't tell him anything about myself. For camming, I have a second identity, so to speak, with a fake job, name and so on. Otherwise I secured my stripchat profile with two factor authentication and I only have lovense wishlist. He also said I should make myself an Amazon wishlist, of course I don't have it because I know how easily buyers can get addresses there.

 

[AmberCutie]

a full-on scorched earth with your online presence and your data should be a tiny bit farther down the list.

Yeah, @Lovegirl94, don't go drastic with what Silent said above. Just block him (sounds like you did) and don't click any links that any members send you, and remove any geotag info from any photos you share. You'll be fine, this dude just sounds like an asshole trying to scare you.

 

[AmberCutie]

Amazon wishlist, of course I don't have it because I know how easily buyers can get addresses there.

Also, I'm so glad you know this! So many newcomers are clueless to how invasive it can be to have one.

 

[NewYorker]

OK. I think you did the right thing. I highly doubt he infected your computer in some way because that would have to go through Stripchat's servers and they are protected from anything like that. There is no direct connection between you computer and his. But basically I always say when in doubt? Silence, Block, Ban. One less user or tipper is not worth your safety no matter what happens. I wish you the very best and remember, give no personal information including putting your location, town, Country on your profile.

 

[mike_aussie]

Block and ignore

 

[englishmuffins]

Stalking should never be joked about, in any industry, especially the adult industry.
Document, report, block, repeat (if necessary).

 

[mike_aussie]

Stalking should never be joked about, in any industry, especially the adult industry.
Document, report, block, repeat (if necessary).

Normally blocking is enough but yes, if you do feel fearful documenting creepy conversations and reporting the user to the site is the way to go just in case things do escalate.

 

[MarieElise]

Also depending on the site use the report feature. The main site I am on (streamate) takes those kinds of reports very seriously, and they also cooperate fully with law enforcement in the instance of crimes. It's really nice. We can't access their true names, address, IP address etc, but support staff most certainly can. There are also often logs of on-site communication, that can be shown to law enforcement if need be, and a situation escalates. Yet another reason why it makes sense and is more convenient to work on-site, and not go the greedy, sketchy route of stealing site traffic that others paid and worked the advertising for.

There are people out there who think that because we are sex workers they can do and say whatever they want, especially if they are paying. The simple fact is that they cannot. You cannot buy people. You can only buy a service, for a time-limited period. To models that is clear, to a certain portion of "members" it's not. We're not your doormat for all your life complaints, shite choices or bull shit, and we are also not your punching bag (metaphorically or literally) for all your life frustrations. What I have to say to Members like that, who get their boundaries "confused" is; handle it. These are Adult sites. For Adults.

And what I have to say to the majority, who have better sense than conduct themselves that way is; Thanks, you guys rule!

 

[Smores]

Hi !

I‘m on Stripchat for a few weeks and already have a few Knights. One of them ,writes me yesterday following PM‘s:

„I have my options to find you ^^“

„but you don't need to panic now^^“

Honestly, he‘s a nice guy and he‘s helping me a lot. But i don’t know how i should feel about this messages.

I hate the fact that he worded this as a kind of implied threat. I think he is not as nice as he is pretending to be. Contrast this to a person who tries to warn you that you have left some security hole open that others could exploit. That person would show you what the security hole is and help you to cover that immediately. The fact that this person tries to hold back that information from you as a kind of power over you is a very bad sign.