If One Of Your Regulars Stopped Coming To Your Room

[ILikeUonTop]

So, if one of your regular members slowly stopped coming around as often and eventually stopped coming to your room, would you want to know why they left? Even if that reason was "I found another model I prefer." Or something similar. I wouldn't expect anyone to bluntly say "I replaced you" or anything, but would you want to know or would you rather hear a white lie about why they left? Or would just knowing it was nothing you did be enough for you? Thoughts on losing a regular?

 

[Jessi]

My feelings would be hurt, but I don't think the member should say anything unless asked. And Id hope for an honest answer if I did, although I personally wouldn't ask and would try to forget about it.

No one wants to get an unprompted MFC mail; "Sorry I found someone I like better"

 

[Sevrin]

This type of question comes up now and then in different forms. This other thread was about members leaving the site altogether.

https://www.ambercutie.com/forums/viewt ... 28&t=14772

Anyway, don't burn any bridges you don't have to.

 

[ILikeUonTop]

Okay let me quickly clear this up. I'm not asking because of me. I was just wondering if someone actually left your room as a regular, would you want to know why even if the reason wasn't one you wanted to hear. I'm not trying to ditch anyone. :lol:

 

[Sevrin]

Okay let me quickly clear this up. I'm not asking because of me. I was just wondering if someone actually left your room as a regular, would you want to know why even if the reason wasn't one you wanted to hear. I'm not trying to ditch anyone. :lol:

That's a question that defies a general answer. The devil is in the details.

I've stopped visiting models I once visited regularly. In one case, it was because she said some things that made me think less of her as a person. Since it wasn't about something like racism, or anything similarly vicious, I decided that it wasn't my place to tell her what kind of person to be, so I just never went back. That's worked out well for everyone.

Besides, there's a remote possibility I could be wrong. :shhh:

 

[Shaun__]

One of the threads full of people mad at me is about this. I think the general consensus was to leave like a thief in the night.

 

[JickyJuly]

If they're getting married and want to leave mfc out of it, traveling the world, sick or have some interesting reason why I might not hear from them anymore, I'd like to hear about it (if we're pals enough for them to feel comfortable sharing that).

 

[NoelleBright]

If I still see a member signing into MFC and just not coming into my room, I can usually infer the reason as to why they stopped coming around and don't get too concerned about it. It does make me sad, but that's just the nature of things. If it's been a while since they have stopped by my room, I will eventually just remove them from my friends list so I don't have a constant reminder that they have moved on every time I'm on cam.

I did, over a year ago, have one of my very best regulars absolutely disappear on me. I sent him a package and just ceased to hear from him after that. He didn't sign in for months or respond to any of my other attempts at contact (we spoke a lot outside of MFC), he eventually did return but never responded (or even read) any of my MFC mails or PMs, and he also ignored any PMs he received from my other regulars (who he was also close with). It was bizarre. I would see his name appear on my friends list very infrequently (as compared to when he used to be on every night).
I do wish I had an explanation from him, but I also understand that he does not in any way owe me one. It's just curious when you're so close with someone and then they just completely remove themselves from you. I spent a good deal of time wondering if it was something I said or did, or if maybe he found someone in real life and decided to move on or what.

It's been a LONG time now and I still occasionally think about what could have gone wrong, if anything at all, and I hope that he left because he chose to focus his time/energy on happiness he found outside of his computer screen.

 

[ComicOzzie]

They're just not that into you anymore.

 

[Always_Tim]

They're just not that into you anymore.

Or the sometimes the exact opposite.

If a member gets too into a particular model then it can be a good idea to make a clean break from her or even from watching cams at all.

It might be nice if they'd say that's the reason, but that can be really hard. An MFC member who had become a pretty good friend of mine stopped logging into MFC, unfriended and blocked the model on Facebook, and emailed me instructing me to tell her that he couldn't continue. He never did supply me an explanation (as he'd promised to in his email) and eventually stopped talking to me and unfriended/blocked me on Facebook as well. Now admittedly I was going though my own stuff with the model that made me seriously consider a similar course of action, so maybe I'm reading too much of my own situation into his decision, but I'm fairly certain that his case was at least partially this scenario based on prior conversations.

Of course it's painful for the model to be rejected that way (in the case of my friends, it was pretty awful), but a clean break is probably much better for the member in certain circumstances, as has been discussed in some other threads here.

 

[MintyFlowers]

Just leave and don't make a big stink.

 

[Courtneypage]

So, if one of your regular members slowly stopped coming around as often and eventually stopped coming to your room, would you want to know why they left? Even if that reason was "I found another model I prefer." Or something similar. I wouldn't expect anyone to bluntly say "I replaced you" or anything, but would you want to know or would you rather hear a white lie about why they left? Or would just knowing it was nothing you did be enough for you? Thoughts on losing a regular?

Oh I am definitely seeing guys not come in my room when I log on. Bruises the ego a bit. But there really is nothing I can do about it. Dipping out though with no explanation is not the greatest feeling or approach in my opinion.
:naughty:

 

[RogueWarrior]

I know you weren't asking this to members, but I'm going to reply anyway.

Whenever I decide a model is not to my liking any longer, whatever the reason may be, I like to make a big production and announce to the model and her room how much of a fucking token whore bitch she is. Then I spread that view, no matter how false it may be, as far and wide as possible.

Seriously, though, I don't have a skin in this game. I make it a point not to be a regular in any room. I don't need that kind of pressure. This is supposed to be fun from a member's perspective (models perspective, different, and I won't even pretend to know).

There are rooms I visit semi-regularly. Rooms that models and members recognize me. But I'm not making a campsite.

In my own personal evolution of camsite viewing, That's where I've landed. Take that as you will.

 

[Courtneypage]

I know you weren't asking this to members, but I'm going to reply anyway.

Whenever I decide a model is not to my liking any longer, whatever the reason may be, I like to make a big production and announce to the model and her room how much of a fucking token whore bitch she is. Then I spread that view, no matter how false it may be, as far and wide as possible.

Seriously, though, I don't have a skin in this game. I make it a point not[/i] to be a regular in any room. I don't need that kind of pressure. This is supposed to be fun from a member's perspective (models perspective, different, and I won't even pretend to know).

There are rooms I visit semi-regularly. Rooms that models and members recognize me. But I'm not making a campsite.

In my own personal evolution of camsite viewing, That's where I've landed. Take that as you will.

Kinda a mindfuck reading that and seeing the cool Snoopy avi. Thru me!

 

[curvyredhead]

Over two years ago my old biggest tipper and former regular stopped comming to my room. I had just taken a break, and frankly I figured he did not realize I was back, or had found someone else he really enjoyed the company of.

I got a pm from him about 2 mins after he entered my room (this was months after I had returned and he had not come into my room knowing....might have watched from the lounge..who knows) He just wanted to let me know he still thought i was a "good person" and that he just did not think i was attractive anymore because I had just lost a bunch of weight. I knew it was total bullshit (since he was at the time also a regular in a ton rooms, bbw, chubby, toned, skinny, curvy...the whole nine yards. He was also a HUGE 10k+ tipper in a top 100 girl's room. He went on to bullshitting about how he only like full figured girls (keep in mind i was still well into the morbidly obese category even with the wight loss) and thought I had lost to much weight. It really just pissed me off, that he is went of his way..months later to let me know why.


Ever since then when I regular does stop attending my room, I think of this guy. So I quickly remove them from my mind, and remind myself that they have a decision who they would like to spend there time and money on. And, whatever those reasons are which are stopping them from seeing me...in the end does not matter...it only makes me appreciate those who DO continue to come to my room.

I would like to say I would never ask why, or pm them. But, there are 2 or 3 I think I would...but then again I can't see them doing that. But, ya never know.

 

[RogueWarrior]

I know you weren't asking this to members, but I'm going to reply anyway.

Whenever I decide a model is not to my liking any longer, whatever the reason may be, I like to make a big production and announce to the model and her room how much of a fucking token whore bitch she is. Then I spread that view, no matter how false it may be, as far and wide as possible.

Seriously, though, I don't have a skin in this game. I make it a point not[/i] to be a regular in any room. I don't need that kind of pressure. This is supposed to be fun from a member's perspective (models perspective, different, and I won't even pretend to know).

There are rooms I visit semi-regularly. Rooms that models and members recognize me. But I'm not making a campsite.

In my own personal evolution of camsite viewing, That's where I've landed. Take that as you will.

Kinda a mindfuck reading that and seeing the cool Snoopy avi. Thru me!

Either you and I could hang out and be really cool or you would hate me.

 

[Courtneypage]

I know you weren't asking this to members, but I'm going to reply anyway.

Whenever I decide a model is not to my liking any longer, whatever the reason may be, I like to make a big production and announce to the model and her room how much of a fucking token whore bitch she is. Then I spread that view, no matter how false it may be, as far and wide as possible.

Seriously, though, I don't have a skin in this game. I make it a point not[/i] to be a regular in any room. I don't need that kind of pressure. This is supposed to be fun from a member's perspective (models perspective, different, and I won't even pretend to know).

There are rooms I visit semi-regularly. Rooms that models and members recognize me. But I'm not making a campsite.

In my own personal evolution of camsite viewing, That's where I've landed. Take that as you will.

Kinda a mindfuck reading that and seeing the cool Snoopy avi. Thru me!

Either you and I could hang out and be really cool or you would hate me.

Completely agree.

 

[HiGirlsRHot]

So, if one of your regular members slowly stopped coming around as often and eventually stopped coming to your room, would you want to know why they left? Even if that reason was "I found another model I prefer." Or something similar. I wouldn't expect anyone to bluntly say "I replaced you" or anything, but would you want to know or would you rather hear a white lie about why they left? Or would just knowing it was nothing you did be enough for you? Thoughts on losing a regular?

Oh I am definitely seeing guys not come in my room when I log on. Bruises the ego a bit. But there really is nothing I can do about it. Dipping out though with no explanation is not the greatest feeling or approach in my opinion.
:naughty:

While that is often true and there is nothing that you can do about the . "I found a shiny new camgirl, and I'm not that into you anymore" Often the reason I stop going into girls is for reasons which are fixable on their part. In rough order of occurrence.
1. You promised me something and never delivered and I am tired of bugging you about.
2. Your basic, non-tipping regulars are taking me for granted. Anything along the lines of "cool HiGirls is here he'll finish the countdown" which gets ignored by a model is pretty much zero tolerance on my part. I'm not blaming you for what a freeloader is saying just your lack of slapping them down.
3. You haven't changed your playlist in 6 months and I'm sick of hearing the same 12 songs and you also are repeating the same 4 shows.
4. You've flaked on me too often. Said you'd cam, didn't show up and didn't bother sending a tweet you were canceling. It isn't the canceling it is the lack of communications.

Since the strong consensus among ACF models is I don't want to hear, I don't say anything. However, I certainly would never be offended if model sent me a PM or email (better) and asked why did you leave. Business use "we are sorry we lost you , we want you back, please tell us why you left and what we can do to get you back, emails and survey's quite effectively.. Elon Musk, entrepreneur extraordinaire, and real life inspiration for Ironmen, is often asked for pointers on being a successful businessman. The one he says most often is solicit negative feedback from friends and customers. No reason this won't work for camgirls.

 

[genttristan]

I'm in no way a model but I wanted to throw my two cents in I just recently as in last month had to delete my account due to the fact that a few models were getting clingy and I lost the fun of there rooms one when I first came on 3 years ago was great but then let the life change her now she has a rack the size of Texas and I just don't find it appealing so I left and she doesn't PM me often the one that really got in thralled began to wine for tips and she asked me and I have her the straight answer and she told me it was bs it wasn't so here I am

 

[JerryBoBerry]

I'm in no way a model but I wanted to throw my two cents in I just recently as in last month had to delete my account due to the fact that a few models were getting clingy and I lost the fun of there rooms one when I first came on 3 years ago was great but then let the life change her now she has a rack the size of Texas and I just don't find it appealing so I left and she doesn't PM me often the one that really got in thralled began to wine for tips and she asked me and I have her the straight answer and she told me it was bs it wasn't so here I am

 

[MrRodry]

:lol:

There was no need for you to delete your account genttristan. If that was an MFC Premium account, you had the option to put those models on your ignore list.

 

[Shaun__]

:lol:

There was no need for you to delete your account genttristan. If that was an MFC Premium account, you had the option to put those models on your ignore list.

I had to do that to a model that kept PMing me asking if I could beat her highest tip, or why I tipped another model more than her. She was famous for that kind of behavior I learned later.

 

[lurkylurk]

1. You promised me something and never delivered and I am tired of bugging you about.

This is happening to me right now, after 4 years as a regular. Not sure how I am going to handle it even after reading both threads on the subject.

 

[SaffronBurke]

On MFC, the only regulars that I've managed to get are clingy, whiny, and don't tip. So I would be overjoyed if they stopped showing up.

On Chaturbate, I don't really have regulars. It's kinda random there. Someone I've never talked to before will suddenly clear my countdown or buy vids and make my night. I may never see them again, but my next shift will have a big tipper or a bunch of small tippers, so I'm not too sad.

 

[HiGirlsRHot]

1. You promised me something and never delivered and I am tired of bugging you about.

This is happening to me right now, after 4 years as a regular. Not sure how I am going to handle it even after reading both threads on the subject.

I wish I had good advice for you, but I don't. If you don't bug them, generally it gets forgotten, and you are left feeling rip off. Especially if you stop going to their room.
If you do bug them,then models feel resentful and stressed which isn't good. I have figured out a tactful way of saying, I am not tipping until you do this..

Good luck.

 

[IsabellaSnow]

It happens all the time. I think it'd be weird if someone you talk to every day just suddenly upped and left and stopped speaking to you/coming to your room, but usually it phases out. And to be honest no I don't particularly want to know about this new model. In most of these cases it's not that they like the new model better, it's simply that variety can be good fun and watching the same model over and over again can be repetitive for some. Many members like the chase in a way, the illusion that there could be more. With a model you already know pretty well you've got as far in the relationship as you ever will. Usually they end up moving on from that other model that they liked so much at the start for the exact same reasons.

I think just edge away, don't do anything suddenly and try not to talk about other models. I hate it when members talk about "oh who will I choose? You and such and such are on" It kind of feels like a backhanded complement. I'd rather not know. Camming is very personal, so telling a model that you'd rather hang out with another girl or don't know how to decide is basically saying someone else is better looking/has a better personality than you, or even saying you're around the same level, which though may not be insulting, it's not nice being compared, just like it's not nice to be one of the last people picked in gym.

My view is just phase her out. Stop visiting quite as much, don't be quite as responsive, usually this comes with tipping less so at the end of the day the model understands. We know we're not your girlfriends. We don't want to have rights over your life. We understand how camming works. This isn;t new information. This has happened to most models dozens of times, members may become close to the model, but they're still replaceable, and if the member is looking towards other models then they're probably not so close anyway. The member is allowed to leave, it's just about being sensitive about it.

 

[Picnic]

At the very least, I would want to know that they were still alive! One of my regulars has disappeared and doesn't even check his MFC mail anymore. He was an older gentlemen, so I can't help but worry something may have happened to him

I understand that there are always other models, life responsibilities, and other reasons regulars might not come back to my room, and that's fine. If someone plans on leaving the site all together, or just taking a break from MFC, I definitely want a heads up, just so that I don't worry about them.

If they have just stopped coming in my room all together because of another model, my feelings might be kind of hurt, but I suppose I wouldn't care too much one way or another if they let me know. I imagine the conversation would be really awkward, but I guess it wouldn't leave me wondering what happened to them. There are so many amazing girls on MFC, I wouldn't expect anyone to be 100% loyal to me and only me.

 

[IsabellaSnow]

At the very least, I would want to know that they were still alive! One of my regulars has disappeared and doesn't even check his MFC mail anymore. He was an older gentlemen, so I can't help but worry something may have happened to him

Pretty much this. I get really worried when someone drops off the face of the earth, but that's different to a member just stopping coming to my room. If I can see they're online and alive then I'm ok, I understand. So long as they're not all best matey one second and the cold shoulder the next it's ok.

I guess it's about being consistent and breaking things in. If you want to visit different models then just start doing it but maybe don't totally break the contact.

I mean really it depends, some members think I give a crap about them. I really don't. If it's a regular who's always in my room tipping and I chat to a lot one on one then I'll notice. With most members to be perfectly honest I probably won't. If it's one of those members who always hangs around and never tips but thinks they're a super close friend then honestly I'd probably feel more happy than sad/worried and wouldn't care that they'd gone.

 

[Misono]

I left a higher rated UK model's room (Not Isabella's, although barely seen you since October!) a few months ago. Their attitude had gradually got a bit worse, and was noticeable to me. I'd also won one of their raffles, and had asked about times to sort out what I'd won, which was a skype show + other bits. They kept missing the time, and it felt rude to keep pestering. Rather than kick up a huge fuss, I just quietly left.

I ignored PM's for a bit, before I finally opted to take the being honest stance. Via PM, I, politely as possible, stated why I'd stopped coming by, at which point I got messages from another regular. Turned out she had been slagging me off in her room because she felt I accused her of badmouthing her and making up that she didn't deliver things.

I walked away from it, but it made me think that if, in future, I opted to leave from a regular, I'd just have to blank them completely. Having that reaction to being honest with someone who you have no emotional attachment to just isn't what I log in for.

 

[Reitas]

Seriously, though, I don't have a skin in this game. I make it a point not to be a regular in any room. I don't need that kind of pressure. This is supposed to be fun from a member's perspective (models perspective, different, and I won't even pretend to know).

There are rooms I visit semi-regularly. Rooms that models and members recognize me. But I'm not making a campsite.

In my own personal evolution of camsite viewing, That's where I've landed. Take that as you will.

Yes all of this, i used to be regular in a couple of models room. Partly the pressure of knowing that a model expects me to come to her room gets me.
(Warning This might get TMI for many) But i also suffer from a form of ''rapid-cycling bipolar disorder''(i.e i change from my normal fun loving self into an apathetic depressed being every couple of weeks) and when i am in my low points i kind of lose controll over myself and do things just out of habit/familiarity like: like watching movies without really following it, reading books without understanding the text, logging into social networks/chats without anyform of interaction(basicly just staring at the screen for about an hour) and that includes MFC too.

When i am in those ''apathetic auto-pilot'' states i don't care about other people(even IRL). And so later when i return to my ''normal'' self and get PMs like ''i missed you'' ''worried about you'', while it does warm my heart it also filled me with guilt. So i came to the same conclusion as RogueWarrior, its better for me if i dont become a regular in any room. I still tip and join a few models rooms and become a recognized face but not a full time regular. (That is also the reason i stopped being parts of guilds in MMOs)

Some might argue that MFC isnt a good place for a person with this kind of disorder. With my disorder it is nigh impossible to keep a steady relationship and i realised about a year ago that i didn't really want a relationship. It was just something that i felt was expected of me in a ''normal'' society. So MFC has become a great supplement to my online social life, i can come online, watch and hang out with hot chicks without any strings attached.

Sorry for going way off topic. And yes, i do see a therapist, i do take medicin like a good boy. Please don't turn this into a mental disorder discussion, i just wanted to give my input. :twocents-02cents: