How does everyone(models/members) feel about PM's?

[Kunra9]

I've seen some members who put a great deal of value on being able to PM a model. Willing to spend hundreds of tokens on a friend add so they CAN pm the model.

Personally I rarely use PM. Usually it's only for a real quick heads up about something. Like hey I saw a video of you on XX website. Hey this person in your room is trying to get me to buy a video of you. Or just to ask a very specific/quick question. I can't recall ever carrying on an actual conversation in PM.

However, I am generally an attention whore and love to spout my stupid nonsense in the public chat area.

Models seem to be split on the subject. Best I can tell the models that have large numbers in their chat room generally don't use PM much, except to maybe arrange details of a private show. While sometimes when I enter an room with 2 people in it, I instantly have a PM from that model (lol)

So what's everybody's opinion on the subject?

 

[16_bit]

I'd never pay to be on a model's friend list. If i'm there often enough, talking enough or another reason to be added to her friends, it's likely i won't have a need to PM the model.

I generally try not to use PM. I don't want to distract the model and have her time and focus on a PM when i could have mfc mailed them or said it public chat. If it something personal, either to me or to the model, then of course i'll use the PM but i don't expect an immediate response and understand that they're busy.
I also use PM's to chat with other members. It stops the model having to read lines of text that aren't for her, and we can plot tricks and tips he he.

I have my PM's open to anyone. Never really had much trouble with other models PMing me or members luckily. I think PM's are very useful but are too often misused. The amount of times you hear models say that people PM just to ask how they are or to say hi is crazy.

 

[Evvie]

Here are my thoughts on it:

On MFC, a model can expect to have dozens or even hundreds of members in her room. While the majority of models read to and respond to public chat, some members feel like they need to be treated differently. This is not necessarily a bad thing, however, it does often seem to put the model at a conflict of interest.

When I was on MFC, the majority of my PMs were from members all trying to have individual conversations with me. For example, instead of saying, "hi, Evvie! How are you?" in public chat, the member would feel like that was a conversation that needed to be private. If I got three or four members in my room who could all PM me, I often found myself having to keep up with four or five separate conversations (all the PMs and the public chat).

However, I can tell you that on my premium account, when I had the ability to PM models, I suddenly felt that most of the things I wanted to say *should* be private. In a room where I am a stranger, I would feel perfectly comfortable saying, "hey, your sound is cutting out," but if I was able to PM the model, suddenly I felt like that should be private information. I also feel that in many ways, being able to PM a model and knowing she is personally focusing on you is extremely gratifying and makes MFC feel much more personal and intimate. However, if you need to have a very serious talk with a model, I do not think that doing that during live camtime is a good idea regardless of the circumstances. Sometimes I think it is a good idea to consider how your conversation will affect her ability to stay upbeat and happy on cam.

Although I understand the great appeal of sending private messages during a live show, I also think members should understand that it is often appropriate to reimburse models for all the personal attention you take up during their show. In this aspect, I think PMing about a private show or custom content is appropriate, because that conversation is leading up to you paying the model. I also think that it is more appropriate to PM a model if you are tipping or contributing towards her goals in some way. However, I feel like this is probably not a popular opinion.

 

[LadyLuna]

I have a message that pops up whenever anyone pm's me. My regulars complain about it, because it interrupts the flow of pm's, but I've gotten a lot fewer people bitching me out about ignoring pm's when I have it there, and no one bothers me because they can't pm me. Those who really have something intersting to say usually are fine with waiting, so this has worked for me to get rid of the time wasters.

The message is usually something along the lines of "Public has priority over pm; I will get to this when I get to it. Check out my profile for previews and quicker answers, otherwise, thank you for your patience." However, for me, MFC doesn't let it go through if I just use the same one as last time, so I have to change it every time for the auto-insert to work.

 

[LilyMarie]

On slow days, I keep my PMs open for everyone. PMs like "how are you"/"you're so sexy" are ignored (they can ask/say that in public), and demands without tokens are ignored. Those people want special attention or they have me muted (so disrespectful!), that's why they're sending a PM.

I quietly add everyone to my PM list who has tipped 50 tokens or more so they can PM me if they're interested in a video or a private show, but I'm definitely considering quitting that. My friends list is way too full and it takes too long to find people in it.

I can't carry on a conversation in PM. I keep forgetting about the PM window and I'm only really able to reply when there's some silence in my public chat. So people who want to chat in PMs will often have to wait a while for me to reply, and I don't think that makes sense for anyone when they can get an immediate reply in public chat. Public chat is ALWAYS first priority. Unless I'm PMing someone who has just tipped 61743691467 tokens or something.

One big pet peeve is when people only say in PMs that they find me attractive/sexy. It bothers me to no end, I'm not sure why. If they HAVE to keep that a secret from the rest of the room (why? :?) they can at least put it in a tip note.

Personally I rarely use PM. Usually it's only for a real quick heads up about something. Like hey I saw a video of you on XX website. Hey this person in your room is trying to get me to buy a video of you. Or just to ask a very specific/quick question. I can't recall ever carrying on an actual conversation in PM.

I believe that that's what PMs should mainly be used for! Quick information exchange.
If someone in my room says 'I have something really important to ask / to tell you in PM', I'll believe that they saw content uploaded on a site, like you said, and then I'll add them to the list so they can PM me about it. If they turn out to be lying, they'll get deleted from the list before they can say 'bb this is important do u do boy girl facial potato balloon show for tokens'.

 

[LuckySmiles]

I've said to people before.. hey I don't wanna you PM myself because you you're probably busy watching someone else if you're not in my room or whatever and I feel dumb..and the cool one's are like oh stop you're hot it's great shuttup...so I'll send the random PM here and there.. I've also have had people who PM me ONLY where I say something like hey I feel weird about PMing someone who doesn't want to be in my room EVER... and they'll overreact like "oh heyy ok sorry I just like to talk to women instead of a room full of men" which I can actually kind of understand too... and then there's the people who ONLY speak to you in PM and especially when your room is dead and they're the only one tipping you... and the room is like wtf this is so boring.. because you're only paying attention to tipper PMer guy and it's like... I know... I'm sorry... but...but...
I know this solves nothing about PM's... but just my overview...thus far...mleghhh

 

[Shutterbuck]

I've never PM'd anyone. I don't know why. I s'pose I never needed to.

 

[RogueWarrior]

I have never, ever paid to be able to PM a model. For those models that have a pay-for-PM, I seem to end up having PM privileges eventually. Not that I am necessarily seeking that. It just kinda happens.

I don't personally have a lot of use for PM. When a model is constantly PMing members, it really takes away from the public chat. Some more so than others. When I wander into a room with a low count and the first thing I get is a PM from the model, I always answer in public chat. That's just my subtle way of saying it's ok to talk in public.

99% of what members want to say in PM can and should be said in public chat. And if something absolutely has to be said privately........tip notes, guys, tip notes.

Of course room count has a lot to do with it as well. In a busy room, I would never expect a model to spend much, if any, time at all with PMs.

:twocents-02cents:

 

[LaceyRoyce]

When I wander into a room with a low count and the first thing I get is a PM from the model, I always answer in public chat. That's just my subtle way of saying it's ok to talk in public.


:twocents-02cents:

Lol I do the same thing. I get a PM like 'hello gorgeous! How is your day so far?" i answer in public chat as a hint. If they don't take it, I ask them nicely .... or tell them that I will catch up on their pms at the end of the show when I can give it my full attention

 

[AprilCarroll]

I have no problem with PMs if the member has a reason to PM me, whether it's to ask if I'm up for a private, to tell me there's a troll spamming people in the room, or to schedule a skype show. I do not enjoy PMs that simply say, "Hi, how are you?" or "You're so hot." Those things can be said in public chat! Having 10 separate conversations via PM distracts me from my room, slowing the conversation and making countdowns and games less fun for everyone, including me.

Also, at the beginning of any show I announce that I will not respond to any PMs until the show is over. It's too distracting and, honestly, if you want personal attention while I'm masturbating, you should pay for a private/skype session. :thumbleft:

Many models set their PMs to "friends only," but I prefer to keep PMs open to all premiums simply so that new guys can ask questions about privates without feeling awkward in front of the whole room. (I completely understand someone feeling hesitant to say, "Would you finger your ass?" in public chat. ) Because of this, though, I get a TON of PMs from random people, so I typically don't respond to them them unless 1) the guy is a regular, 2) the guy is asking a specific question, or 3) my room is dead. I want guys coming into my room to realize that they'll get FAR more personal attention from me if they talk to me in public chat.

This being said, I really love talking to my regulars, and I'm more than happy to shoot the breeze via PM if I'm logged in and not broadcasting! :toothy8:

 

[LaceyRoyce]

I keep pms open, btw - and always have.

I get large amounts, and ignore most of them.. but sometimes there is the shy guy that doesnt want to come out in chat and speak to me about his fetish or whatever, and this is fine by me.
"Fist ass bb?" etc...

 

[Mirra]

I've never understood how much value some members put on their ability to PM a model. I typically only initiate them when I want to say something that would be more disruptive or inappropriate for public... which is pretty rare and I don't consider them a priority. I used to spend stupid amounts of time on IRC though so I am extremely comfortable with conversing in chat rooms once I get a feel for the atmosphere in each.

I personally turned my own PMs to friends only. Have an 'a' at the end of my name means a lot of people assume I'm a chick. PMing me is nothing special though so anyone wanting to should just let me know.

 

[Keithy]

As long as I can get in touch with whom I need to get in touch with, we're good. Most models I need to contact, I can get here if nothing else. Or for a nice happy note, I can send an offline tip with a message attached.

 

[HiGirlsRHot]

I pay for PM privileges quite often. PM privileges along with content seem like the best ways of tipping a model I like. I try to not abuse the privilege and certainly never had a model complain. Obviously some models are better than others about multitasking and dealing with PMs. The only time I think it is a problem is when a model is spending the majority of her timing responding to PMs rather than paying attention to the room. Even then it is is only a problem if some guy a drops a monster tip and the models take a long time to respond or even miss it completely.

I typically use them to respond to something the model tweeted about early.
Also if I am regular in room I also ask questions about new members in the room who are quite talkative and or demanding. Is this new guy a regular, a new guy, or a $20 premium? Depending on the answer I'll treat the guy differently.

I do the same thing, as Rogue Warrior does if come into a low count room and receive a PM from the model. I'll respond in public chat.

 

[HarmlessSquirrel]

I use PMs to models sparingly. I use them to other members a bit more but still not a ton. Generally, I'm not going to PM a model while she's busy unless I have something specific to say that's not really for public (one example is when I had a screen cap I wanted to submit, and I wanted her approval before I sent it in). I agree that it's not really a good idea to PM just for general chat while a model has a room to attend to. I might use it for that if she was online but not on cam, but that rarely happens for very long.

As others have said, I'm not interested in tipping to get on a friends list, although I've ended up on some just because I happened to tip enough for that anyway. A few times, a model has added me to her list without tips being a factor (as far as I know). That feels good -- it's more like being acknowledged as an actual friend to some degree. I still don't use PMs all that much in those cases, but it's pleasant to know I'm welcome to do so.

 

[southsamurai]

i dunno... being able to pm is great for when its needed, but i tend to avoid using it myself. unless the model pms me first i assume that usin the main chat room is going to be what she prefers for the vast majority of convos. the main exceptions to that is medical stuff.... i have the whole confidentiality thing ingrained in me so if the convo turns medical i prefer pms. also if theres a lot of information a pm will let me enter it in one go rather than having a character limit. being a typical know-it-all i tend to get long winded if im explaining something.

of course those situations assume that the model or member has asked me something in the first place, i try very hard not to give un asked for advice of any kind

 

[Shaun__]

I use PMs when the model or I feel the need to have a private conversation that is not suitable for public chat.

 

[CCRhyder]

I don't have members pay to PM me, because I simply hate passing on business. What some guys need to understand though is when I'm online I am at work. If you'd like to have small talk we can do that public. I leave Pm's open for show bookings, and video questions. That sort of thing, so normally when I'm swamped with 100 pm's at once, and people start getting upset that I'm not replying back a small tip usually gets my attention.

 

[Jessi]

I keep PMs very private.

1) Its extremely distracting and irritating to get a gazillion "hi how r u bb" and "mmm ye bb my cock so hard 4 u" messages
2) Even decent conversations can be distracting and could always be had in public chat where we include everyone. I can't hinder my countdown or ignore possible new people to have an indepth conversation with one individual.
3) I used to ask 200 tokens for a friendslist add. Back when I did this, Id have rude/annoying people flip out at me revoking their privileges. They thought since they "paid for it" they should be able to harangue me forever. If you abuse it, you lose it:naughty:

Now I keep my friendslist strictly for long time regulars, friends, etc and I'm much happier and more productive for it. Ive tried my best to have a straight forward profile and FAQ that I can refer people to, and I am happy to answer any questions in public chat. If for whatever reason someone is too embarrassed to ask me what format a video is in front of other members, they can send me an MFC mail and I'll look at it when I'm able to. But just to reiterate, I can't give away my instant, undivided attention at the expense of ignoring everyone else. Ive tried multitasking it, but I just can't balance enough to focus on both, and I shouldnt have to tear myself in two directions like that while trying to be sexy.

 

[IsabellaSnow]

When I had pm's open to anyone I used to get bombarded with pointless messages. Practically all of the people wouldn't tip. No one would talk in the public room.

It's amazing though, if I open my pm's, members who would have never have said anything to me in the public room, even members with tokens will message me, try talking to me/getting attention. They won't tip. They'll just leave.

This one guy I remember I opened my pm's to see what the weirdest messages I'd get would be. This one guy had 900 tokens, and just went on and on about how he loved me. I was like "riiight.... love me so much you're not tipping at all..." Anyway, the guy never tipped me anything.
I will get a LOT of messages asking about escorting, peeing/various fetishes that personally I find disgusting. People tend to be a lot more demanding in pm's.
It's so much easier just having people on friendslist who have already tipped/you enjoy talking to.
Problem with that is, for example when you get someone who doesn't tip much and sends you loads of irritating pm's, online and offline, and you then take them off your friendslist, chances are they will have a hissy fit and won't come back to your room.

 

[ComicOzzie]

I've never paid a token to be added to a model's friends' list. First of all, because that would mean I am not really her friend. Secondly, because it is very cool to have a model PM me after I have been in her room a few weeks to notify me that she has added me to her friends' list.

:dance:

 

[UncleThursday]

I am often in PM windows, mostly because I can't stand the constant 'show feet bb' or other such inane bullshit that happens in many model's rooms. If I come into a room, normally, it means I am looking for a private (since ironically the go private option in PM windows tells you you are unauthorized to view the stream... at least the last time I tried it, anyway), or I know her regulars are cool people to hang out with. I can tip through the PM window and join group if I wish.

However, I don't expect instant responses to any PMs I send, either. I kind of think of them like texting on a phone. Unless it is some sort of dire emergency (and, honestly, is there ever a real emergency between a member and model that needs immediate responses?), then we get back to each other when we can.

The only time I seem to get more attention through PMs than the room is if I'm the only one tipping at the time. Like a few months back for PlayboyMegan's Megathon; early in the morning for her, I was literally the only person tipping for like an hour and a half, but I wasn't in her room, just PM window. So she ended up writing more to me in PMs than normal. Our normal PM convos are funny little things and normally minutes go between replies to each other, which is perfectly fine.

Also, many of my favorites are on at similar times, so it is easier to have a few PM windows up over a few popup rooms (I never use the main window rooms). I'm a multiperver, what can I say?

Also, some models I know PM me first. Sometimes when I'm sleeping, mind you... :lol: Even models I never thought would do so. Like LovelyBri, before she apparently quit camming ( :crybaby: ). She'd be online, not yet in her room, and PM back and forth with me for a good 10-30 minutes before finally getting on cam-- and even though I secretly crushed on her for like a year, I had only started talking to her a few days beforehand. Aly_Darling did the same, before she also disappeared. Even high camscore models I know do this with me, sometimes. Loca_Loca_ has PMed me while in talking privates with members (or more often than not, PM me saying to wake up loser :lol: ), Deeeelicious will sometimes PM me when she first comes on, just to say hi and how are you. Etc. These models aren't hurting for my tips or attention, either. They make a good amount of tokens each day, so what little I can tip isn't why they do it.

Other models, with slower rooms, yeah, they may do it because I tip more often than other people in their rooms. But, it's not like I can tip them every time they are on, either. One even just gave me her Whatsapp info for us to be able to text back and forth, last night, after a fairly long and fun Skype time. But she even told me it's because she liked how I act towards her. Never begging, tipping when I can, sending jokes about how sexy her belly button is, or her knees, or her shoulders or other things I sometimes say just to be funny.

She's not the first model to give me her phone number, either. And I don't mean the 'x tokens for my number' things. These were given out because they liked me enough to do so. And even with the others who have given me their numbers, it's not like I text every day or anything. Maybe once a week or so, just having fun with each other, or when it's their birthday or something. Or if I catch them online (my work schedule conflicts with their cam schedule, normally) and they log off while I am AFK, I'll just send a quick bye text.

These are also the type of models who either turn my cam on when it is on, or ask me why my cam isn't on when we're online at the same time (or ask me when I will do a shower show for them... masochists, I swear). And I'm quite boring on cam, trust me. Oh, and fugly, can't forget that.

I'm sure other people think of PMs as 'give me more personal attention' things. I just use them to let them know I'm watching, say some funny things, send tips, etc... without having to deal with $20 basics or premiums who feel because they've spent a few bucks, ever, that they can dictate how the room should be.

 

[Ann_Sulu]

I admit I probably would generate more business by opening pm to everyone, however I'm also easily distracted. Once I see someone as reaching 100 tokens in tips towards me they are able to pm. Sometimes I like pm, sometimes not. I warn guys I'll ignore their PMs if they keep chatting there only. If it's important...about a private, or something they don't want to say in chat it's fine. I tend to pm when I'm off cam though, and most of my guys know this. So, it's really irritating when one guy doesn't understand how difficult it is to follow his "So how are you bb?" conversation in pm, since it would be more "personal" once I'm off cam.

 

[JickyJuly]

I only add people to my list if I enjoy them enough not to mind pming with them. That way, if I know that my mood doesn't mesh with all of the goobers, I can turn the messaging to friends only.

 

[Jessi]

I would also add, that if a guy is tipping consistently I would pay more attention to his PMs- but that definitely has a limit.
When attention to one member is inhibiting attention to the chat room, you need to ask yourself if its worth it.

 

[Keithy]

I keep PMs very private.

1) Its extremely distracting and irritating to get a gazillion "hi how r u bb" and "mmm ye bb my cock so hard 4 u" messages
2) Even decent conversations can be distracting and could always be had in public chat where we include everyone. I can't hinder my countdown or ignore possible new people to have an indepth conversation with one individual.
3) I used to ask 200 tokens for a friendslist add. Back when I did this, Id have rude/annoying people flip out at me revoking their privileges. They thought since they "paid for it" they should be able to harangue me forever. If you abuse it, you lose it:naughty:

Now I keep my friendslist strictly for long time regulars, friends, etc and I'm much happier and more productive for it. Ive tried my best to have a straight forward profile and FAQ that I can refer people to, and I am happy to answer any questions in public chat. If for whatever reason someone is too embarrassed to ask me what format a video is in front of other members, they can send me an MFC mail and I'll look at it when I'm able to. But just to reiterate, I can't give away my instant, undivided attention at the expense of ignoring everyone else. Ive tried multitasking it, but I just can't balance enough to focus on both, and I shouldnt have to tear myself in two directions like that while trying to be sexy.

Speaking of which:
hi how r u bb? mmmm ye bb my cock so hard 4 u

 

[TacoBelle]

I rarely add anyone to my friend's list, nor do I sell PM privileges. I personally think that you should have to work for the right to my undivided attention (while on cam) by either being a long-time regular or funny as hell. And often, the few people that are on my list will send messages like "OMG... when you almost fell out of your chair, I literally LOL'd!!!" I always just respond in chat because that's where that type of message belongs.

Essentially, this is a BUSINESS. A model's attention needs to go to the public/regulars/customers (whatever she calls them), because that's where she's got the most potential for keeping her business running. If you go into a store or restaurant and the workers spend the whole time on the phone giving you the "wait a moment" finger, you would begin to get impatient and annoyed. The longer this continued without being served, you would eventually become so aggravated that you would find somewhere else to do business. It's just common courtesy. If you have been given PM rights from a model, USE COMMON SENSE, YO.

 

[MissKiaDoll]

While I want to say I don't mind them, of my two shows one was very busy and I was pretty overwhelmed with PMs and ended up just focusing on a few and public chat, and the other was slow so I got a couple good convos in pm going and ignored a bunch of random stupid ones. While I can't seem myself turning off PMs, I will probably get much more selective in who I respond to, because I definitely don't want to take attention away from the room.

 

[Ann_Sulu]

While I want to say I don't mind them, of my two shows one was very busy and I was pretty overwhelmed with PMs and ended up just focusing on a few and public chat, and the other was slow so I got a couple good convos in pm going and ignored a bunch of random stupid ones. While I can't seem myself turning off PMs, I will probably get much more selective in who I respond to, because I definitely don't want to take attention away from the room.

I tell everyone that I ignore pm and chat during shows. I tell them if they want to tell me something they can tell it in a tip note.

 

[DudeExtreme]

When I first became active on MFC, I used to PM a lot because I was shy, but liked to talk--a borderline introvert/extravert. After being on MFC awhile, I think I've found a balance between the two. Most of my conversations can be said in public chat, while private information still needs to be private. If its real important, like planning a surprise for a member or reminding her of something privately, I may say, "Look in your PM" in public chat to give her a heads up.