Gifts and Whatsapp with these studios

[Purpledragon2]

Hello, I just want to give a cam model a gift. Good or bad idea?

SCENARIO:
I am basically new on CB (one month) and find most of what happens very positive. It's helped me a lot with being comfortable on cam through C2C and my twitter, PHub, and news habits have dropped off a cliff. I still can't ween myself off Twitch.

I am now spending a LOT of time with one model who I started following immediately. I actually signed up for CB after the second time I saw her and when she had a cold all day; she is a foreign (non-US) studio model. I gave her a large tip right after her day was over. That gift never came up in our PMs. I now generally tip 5-50 tokens a day with her. I've had two several hour PVTs with her mostly just C2C, dance party, chat and giving her time away from the crowd.

I aways join when things are slow. Often she is either bored or visibly not happy; she's expressed and it's obvious how stressful some of her PVTs can be. Even though we sell each other the fantasy; she did let her guard down once and said there is unequivocally no fantasy at her work - that was a real gut punch to hear. I think she's been with this studio for <6mo but I don't no how long she's been camming; she's out of her 20's.

THE GIFT:
I wanted to give her a gift and didn't know how to approach it and I am limited to WhatsApp to contact her for now. As I see it, this is independent of any streaming service provided by CB or any other streaming service - we pay CB not the model. Regardless of any studio contract, I don't see them as deserving a penny of a gift - I doubt they would actually pay taxes on it anyway - and don't see it as a legitimate good-faith contractual arrangement with the model (their representative) and the customer. Legally it's even problematic from the US to pay directly for sexual services and not have this truly be treated as a gift.

THE PROBLEM: WhatsApp - red flags
By all appearances she has a lot of autonomy in her studio room and handles all the communications through multiple streaming services. She does all the typing herself with her replies; I've also noticed she types in English by pecking and two hands with her native language. At the end of her last couple of streams she said we could continue chatting on Whatsapp. We come back later and start chatting. It feels impersonal on her end. Whatsapp chats during streams felt natural. She has not explicitly asked for money, yet. I once asked if she needed anything from me and she replied "like what," I deflected. The next day after a couple of exchanges she text "I want to buy something" I deflected again. I also deleted the one photo of me from the conversation - she didn't call me on that - I do regret doing it.

Her hinting at wanting something could be innocent play and after how personal we've gotten I really don't mind - If it is coming from her alone. She doesn't have a ton of followers and given where she's from and COVID, I'm sure she has very real needs that aren't met.

Are there shady studios who push their models to ask for gifts, money?

WHAT NOW:
Run for the hills. Yeah, that's not me - I'm a sucker who believes in using my stimulus check for international economic stimulus.
I've considered getting her my email to bypass Whatsapp. I'm just assuming the studio owns her phone (like many corporations) and her Whatsapp. Although, First thing I asked if Whatsapp was her personal and she was a little defensive. I have my limits set on gifting. She has absolutely zero obligation. The amounts aren't any different than what I've given to twitter users or random people on FB. I personally like to give to individuals and not orgs.

THE QUESTION:
Should I offer her an email address and let her decide if she wants to work around the studio? Or just accept that the studio will steal a portion of a financial gift?

 

[thinkinboutit]

Are there shady studios who push their models to ask for gifts, money?

Yes, very common.

She might just want to keep in touch with a good customer. But it also kind of sounds like the beginning stages of a scam story (there are hundreds on this forum).

 

[Purpledragon2]

I've definitely misinterpreted some conversations because of the language divide. There's a lot of trust building with PMs and PVT. I'm inclined to be cautious and am not that concerned about scamming, if it happens it happens. It would have to be extreme for me to consider anything a 'scam'. It's also not healthy for me to think of it that way. Should I give a gift of any kind, it's best to drop my concerns for now at let any gift be appreciated for what it would be.

 

[cbhours]

Not really giving us much to go on what country we talking here? You never found out the gift she wanted? Sending money internationally is such a freaking hassle to some countries. A gift that isnt easily resold would probably go to the model......well at least has a much higher chance than cash.

It sounds like you are concerned you arent speaking to the model outside of her broadcast. start up that conversation about that gift in a time way outside of her typical broadcast then ask for a 10 second video call to prove you are really speaking to the model.

The studio can easily create multiple emails for that purpose, asking for an email to bypass whatsapp would probably do nothing.

 

[Billyboy]

You have to assume that the studio sees everything. I was chatting to a model friend on Whatsapp over months and then got a random message from an unknown number. Turns out it was the same model on her personal phone. She had copied my number from the other phone. She proved it by short video call way outside her normal broadcast time. With another model, she said she had up to 4 different monitors who would be in her room, but also could log in an see her PMs.

 

[Purpledragon2]

I appreciate all the comments. I'm more comfortable with our Whatsapp exchanges today. I'll definitely try the video chat when its time. I woke up this morning wishing I hadn't posted here; god, never write anything after midnight. If someone benefits from the everyone's advice here then I guess that's good. It'd be nice to come back to the post in a few weeks, months, year and have a charming or funny story; I know there are a lot of kind souls in the webcam community, I choose to believe I've crossed paths with one of them.

 

[Billyboy]

Good luck with everything. I hope it works out. Just make sure you pull the plug before the back tattoo.

 

[Trixxi_Love]

Just FYI I recently found out that we can make a Lovense wish list on the Lovense website and if you know the persons name for the wishlist or they give you the link you can then purchase items safely. The website sends items directly to the model without providing the sender their shipping address information. Sounds like a win win for both people.

 

[Derek_Zoolander]

I get the appeal of buying something not on the menu. I have done it many times with many cam models. OP, I am not convinced you know what you are getting yourself into. You seem to want to figure out where the fantasy ends and where reality begins. Clever models will keep you spending just for that endeavor.

 

[Purpledragon2]

Of course I don’t know what I’ve gotten myself into. And She’s very capable keeping me spending On CB. I’m not buying anything not on the menu; I wouldn’t take anyone up on freebies outside of CB. It was just a gift. Her studio is new and she hasn’t been there long. Why she talked openly with someone at the end of an open show recently is beyond me; i don’t think they were from the studio (someone knocked at the door, spoke and then the guy asked if they were gone) and they were talking business mostly. i could only pickup some of the language, but she did speak of the gift as a present.

I’m a bit surprised how long this has gone on; I could do this indefinitely(a very weak superpower). I watched her contemplate not replying to me at the end of a show a few days ago. She waited until the last second And hit send. I have little doubt had she not replied that it would have been the end of our messages And an emotionally made gut decision. But it goes on, whether because she likes me or for the “endeavor“.

Fantasy and reality are partners in a dance; indistinguishable, yet one is a ghost, the other the wind.

 

[CornerStone_]

Of course I don’t know what I’ve gotten myself into. And She’s very capable keeping me spending On CB. I’m not buying anything not on the menu; I wouldn’t take anyone up on freebies outside of CB. It was just a gift. Her studio is new and she hasn’t been there long. Why she talked openly with someone at the end of an open show recently is beyond me; i don’t think they were from the studio (someone knocked at the door, spoke and then the guy asked if they were gone) and they were talking business mostly. i could only pickup some of the language, but she did speak of the gift as a present.

I’m a bit surprised how long this has gone on; I could do this indefinitely(a very weak superpower). I watched her contemplate not replying to me at the end of a show a few days ago. She waited until the last second And hit send. I have little doubt had she not replied that it would have been the end of our messages And an emotionally made gut decision. But it goes on, whether because she likes me or for the “endeavor“.

Fantasy and reality are partners in a dance; indistinguishable, yet one is a ghost, the other the wind.

What happens with gifts varies from studios to studios, from girls to girls. It's the same with their social medias and their webcam account. Some have control over them, some don't. Also, depending on the gift, the country, and where it comes from, their might be customs and taxes to be pay upon reception of said gift. Just something to bear in mind.
There is no way to know unless you (or someone you know) have some personal experience with that given studio.
In any case if she gives you an address to send it to, 99.9% it will be the studio's address, unless she is out to her own entourage and don't mind explaining where it came from.
The likely things to happen with a gift depending, on what it is: they will resell it and split the value with the girl (more likely for high value stuff), she will use it on stream (lingerie or sex stuff), it will become a studio accessory (like say if it's a nice hair iron) or she will keep it. In all cases she should get something out of it, although it might be 30% of it's cash value or just a new prop to help her do her shows.

My advise to you would be to not try to guess too much what's going on in her mind, or giving meaning to things that you have no way of knowing if that is true.
The way she talked could just be normal conversation. Like when any one of my real life friend is saying "oh i want to buy that xyz thing".
Or when you say she was contemplating not replying to you, or was she thinking about something else that had zero to do with you and it only looked like that on cam? If you always project your feeling or your fears onto her actions, you will drive yourself crazy. You have to be able to distance yourself from making these jump, otherwise, wether she is sincere, scaming you, just playing, or whatever, it will stress you out to no end. Just take this as a fun online fling and no more, because 99.9% that is what it is.

 

[Purpledragon2]

The way she talked could just be normal conversation. Like when any one of my real life friend is saying "oh i want to buy that xyz thing".

This was the exact situation and was confirmed as a sincere thing she wanted with regards to something i saw when the cam stayed on after she was offline (that was unexpected and I did let her know - she responded both a little embarrased and affectionately). Sorry to be so vague on details.

By all accounts she has been consistent and entirely honest with me. I think we are both being respectful and caring, but also careful. I think I’m getting much better at “distancing [myself] from making these jumps“ now and hope to have put it behind me. She is an incredible person and I am fortunate to be in her good graces.

 

[PeterBland]

Well she has your phone number so if she wants to take things further and contact you from her personal phone, she'll do that, but try not to push her to do anything to risk her employment with the studio.

 

[Purpledragon2]

I think women at studios from poor countries or not can be susceptible to falling for customers. Even if they do, they will be conflicted because their livelihood is at risk. I will say the woman I’ve been communicating with has intentionally let me see some of her personal life and it made me realize just how fortunate I am.

I would also add that these studios push a hard sell, not much different than a car salesman. I really despise a hard sale. A car salesman brought my mother to tears - I was relatively polite and shut him down. same thing happened to my brother and I stood square in front of the guy and said “Don’t pull that bullshit with me“ etc. and he accused me of cussing him out and refused to sell the car to us (chaturbate equivalent of banning). The manager called to apologize and closed the deal the next morning.

To the point, studios will have the women tell you they will chat on whatsapp if you tell them you are leaving - it’s clear that the poor translation is scripted and repeated. She‘s also asked for help meating token requirements but completely ignores responses saying I would help and how much. You may also see messages that seems out of character or a messages she somehow read but has no recollection of. All of the interaction and responses on video whether in Whatsapp or CB appear genuine. However, there are small cracks in trust and it happens from both sides. Any user should be suspicious, but if you don’t want the conversations to end, be careful or do not call them on it. I would guess that ’many’ of the studios are unethical and their contracts are abhorrent and take advantage of vulnerable models. Many models may go along with the con, but I would guess there a quite a few uncomfortable with it or hate it. There’s just no way to completely trust messaging especially if you don’t speak the same language; the studio likely have social media logins and/or provided the phone. They hold a lot of sway over the models.

On a side note, I’ve considered having the studio cursed with some vudu / black magic should the time come (only if it wouldn’t harm the model).

 

[Purpledragon2]

I think women at studios from poor countries or not can be susceptible to falling for customers. Even if they do, they will be conflicted because their livelihood is at risk. I will say the woman I’ve been communicating with has intentionally let me see some of her personal life and it made me realize just how fortunate I am.

I would also add that these studios push a hard sell, not much different than a car salesman. I really despise a hard sale. A car salesman brought my mother to tears - I was relatively polite and shut him down. same thing happened to my brother and I stood square in front of the guy and said “Don’t pull that bullshit with me“ etc. and he accused me of cussing him out and refused to sell the car to us (chaturbate equivalent of banning). The manager called to apologize and closed the deal the next morning.

To the point, studios will have the women tell you they will chat on whatsapp if you tell them you are leaving - it’s clear that the poor translation is scripted and repeated. She‘s also asked for help meating token requirements but completely ignores responses saying I would help and how much. You may also see messages that seems out of character or a messages she somehow read but has no recollection of. All of the interaction and responses on video whether in Whatsapp or CB appear genuine. However, there are small cracks in trust and it happens from both sides. Any user should be suspicious, but if you don’t want the conversations to end, be careful or do not call them on it. I would guess that ’many’ of the studios are unethical and their contracts are abhorrent and take advantage of vulnerable models. Many models may go along with the con, but I would guess there a quite a few uncomfortable with it or hate it. There’s just no way to completely trust messaging especially if you don’t speak the same language; the studio likely have social media logins and/or provided the phone. They hold a lot of sway over the models.

On a side note, I’ve considered having the studio cursed with some vudu / black magic should the time come (only if it wouldn’t harm the model).

signing off. I’m falling for her; it’s too late for me. I’m going to let myself get hurt.

 

[Billyboy]

signing off. I’m in love. I’m going to let myself get hurt.

Good luck mate

 

[PeterBland]

I think women at studios from poor countries or not can be susceptible to falling for customers. Even if they do, they will be conflicted because their livelihood is at risk. I will say the woman I’ve been communicating with has intentionally let me see some of her personal life and it made me realize just how fortunate I am.

It's true. Some of these performers pay rent in cash on a week-to-week basis and are not able to build up savings. Falling in love or not is low down on their list of priorities when they / their family have always had to worry about meeting their basic needs (food, shelter).

 

[AudriTwo]

I think women at studios from poor countries or not can be susceptible to falling for customers. Even if they do, they will be conflicted because their livelihood is at risk. I will say the woman I’ve been communicating with has intentionally let me see some of her personal life and it made me realize just how fortunate I am.

Most EE an SA studios train their models to pretend they are falling for their customers to keep them hooked. They are trained to lead their customers on. It's why we have so many in love with a cammodel threads. It's mostly all dudes who got hustled into a love-con by a studio model.