Findom Advice

[IntravenousFlytrap]

Hello ladies, I've recently become VERY interested in trying out findom, and was wondering what is a good price to sell a Premium Snapchat for as a findom? I know they tend to charge much more than the regular model, so I'm just curious since I'm new to this.

By the way, any fellow findoms in this forum? Any advice you can give a newbie like myself? I'm naturally a very generous person, so this is totally foreign territory for me, but with all the success I've seen with it when it comes to other models playing the role I want to give it a shot.

How do you go about getting clients? Do you think starting through a phone service would be the best way to seek out the whales? I read a findom's blog that suggested this, so I'm just curious as to what you all think.

How do you act when you're camming live? I'm usually a chill person in my rooms and use a regular old tip menu with some pretty vanilla stuff on it. Should I spice my tip menu up, make it much more expensive, or just not use it at all and be my sweet usual self and save my domme personality for the subs who come to ME through PMs or whatever? If that makes sense.

What kind of videos do you make? Do you simply talk down to your customers and demand pay, or do you do other fetish videos as well to attract subs? Do you bother with dressing extra sexy, or does it even matter? How about photos? Just regular sexy pics? I know that clips4sale requires quite a large amount of photos for you to be able to even open an image store on their website. I'm not into BDSM at all (aside from findom obviously), so would my vanilla nudes suffice?

Most importantly, with snapchat, what do you offer on there for your subs? Or do you not care and just post whatever you want whenever you feel like it even if you overprice your snapchat to get them to buy into it?

Also, how successful are findoms on sites like Streamate? Should I even bother with a findom persona on such a private-focused site, or do most guys not seem to be into that? Seems like a lot of guys on SM just want cumshows.

It seems to me that findoms are focused more around their OWN pleasure rather than fulfilling any specific fantasies their subs may have aside from draining their wallets for their dommes. I don't know how true that is, so please enlighten me. I personally plan to offer SOME generous incentive through phone calls, private shows, and things like that. I just plan to make them much more expensive than I normally would.

Sorry if I sound laughably naive about all of this. I've done SOME research on the subject, but not too much... I've changed my name from Keta Kat to Queen Keta Kat and have demanded those who play with me address me as their Queen, since it gives an air of dominance over them.

 

[a_haze420]

I would say 100% the best sites for findom are streamate and niteflirt!!

That's where I've found most of my findom clients. There are tons of findom/femdom girls here on the forum

I also have a lot of success with femdom findom clips on iwantclips and lesser so on clips4sale

There is a femdom chit chat thread in MO lounge chat I believe!

 

[Zana]

Here’s a good thread
https://www.ambercutie.com/forums/threads/the-femdom-chitchat-thread.28269/

 

[a_haze420]

Here’s a good thread
https://www.ambercutie.com/forums/threads/the-femdom-chitchat-thread.28269/

Thank you I didn't have time to get the link I was on my break at work haha

 

[mynameisbob84]

It seems to me that findoms are focused more around their OWN pleasure rather than fulfilling any specific fantasies their subs may have aside from draining their wallets for their dommes. I don't know how true that is, so please enlighten me. I personally plan to offer SOME generous incentive through phone calls, private shows, and things like that. I just plan to make them much more expensive than I normally would.

I fear there might be a bit more to it than that. The successful findoms that I've seen make it look effortless and like they have an army of men working around the clock just to send them money (and maybe some of them really do) but I'd have to imagine there's a lot of behind the scenes work going on, and you'll definitely be needing to fulfill a variety of fantasies that likely won't interest you sexually.

Some might be into foot worship or humiliation or homewrecking or want you to be a chastity keyholder or they might be into blackmail or public exposure or cuckolding or maybe they like the idea of being pimped out by you - and what might make one sub fork over the contents of their wallet might send another running into the arms of another domme. So you'd likely need to get to know each of them individually and get to know their kinks and keep them interested, all of which takes time and effort.

 

[THE MOLLIE MARIE]

Read this.

 

[Phoenix4987]

While yes it can be lucrative, but so can any hustle as long as its done well. Why not build a really strong foundation before trying to spread yourself thin with all of the different approaches? It wasn't too long ago you started camming and made a thread about how to just have conversations with your members. Not shooting you down, just saying there isn't any "get rich quick" scheme when it comes to camming, if that's what interested you in findom in the first place - little effort, big reward fallacy. Like guys will just willingly take over your bills cause you're a bitch to them. lol. There has to be a "you" aspect to it as well. What separates you from the other chicks who want lots of money for virtual interactions, yknow?

Different websites appeal to different audiences and sure, there's "whales" on each of them. And even their interests might change over time. There isn't anything saying you can't find "whales" who will spoil you on mfc just for being you...or...cam you I should say. You might turn them off suddenly if you start changing your hustle and they're left scratching their heads like.."Why did this chick just increase her snapchat from 300 to 5000 tokens?" "What's with the personality change?" Etc. Etc.

The money is out there, just build some really solid foundations while you learn different approaches. And just suddenly changing your tags to "findom" isn't going to just attract dudes with thousands of dollars ready to just give it to you.

Sorry if this came across rude, I'm just sayin'.

 

[Serenity_Tam]

Financial Domination is oversaturated with ladies right now tbh. It is harder to make money as a findom than with other femdom niches lately, just thinking of years past compared to now.


There also seem to be more dudes lately claiming to be finsubs trying and succeeding in taking advantage of gals like you who believe it's easy or quick money. You will fail if you don't understand the dominance and power exchange behind findom. Absolute promise. Just like anything you have to be true to yourself in many ways. CLients who are worth their salt can pick up fakery a mile away.


My helpful advice: nothing is overpriced. NOTHING. Sell your snapchat for $500? it is not overpriced, it's what it is worth. You're just a lady who knows her worth.

 

[Phoenix4987]

You will fail if you don't understand the dominance and power exchange behind findom.

For any sex worker relationship for that matter. $1000 is a decent chunk of change to anyone. If you can't be trusted to do your part for $1000, (or whatever price), why then would things change if somehow the ante is raised to $3000, $5000, and so on.

It takes effort, trust and communication for things to go down smooth at any price level. Once a dent comes up, it takes time to repair it too, on both sides of the coin.

 

[Ms_Gingersnatch]

I'm not into BDSM at all (aside from findom obviously)

This seems problematic. Findom is almost never pure findom. At its heart it's a type of BDSM and is very often co-morbid with other fetishes that you need to be able to accommodate.

Is your guy into findom because he likes the humiliating aspects of living on ramen while giving his money away like a fool? Does he like the humiliation and cuckoldry of knowing that he's financing lavish dates that you go on with other men? Does he like the fear and potential humiliation of being "blackmailed?" Is his fantasy that you arrange forced-bi prostitution scenarios so that he earns your money by sucking cock? Is he more of a slave looking for a firm but caring and sexy accountant Findomme to rule his finances so that he never has to think about it and only has to obey? Does he love to worship but hate his job, so this is his way of turning those dreaded 40 hours into submission (because now earning his paycheck is how he worships you)? Does his love of feet involve seeing his favorite pair in some of those expensive, red-soled shoes? Does he crave the adrenaline rush and feeling of non-consent when you take over his credit card or Amazon account and spend as you like (don't do that - it's not legal)? Is he just randomly overwhelmed by generosity when he hears a graphic depiction of how you will sit on his face and make him mine your dirty butthole with his tongue in search of some other man's cum?

If you are a Findomme but not a Femdomme, will you be able to identify your sub's co-morbid fetishes and be able to play with them?

It seems to me that findoms are focused more around their OWN pleasure rather than fulfilling any specific fantasies their subs may have aside from draining their wallets for their dommes.

From the outside, that's how it appears to be for all Dom(me)s. However, being a top is actually a whole lot of work, especially if someone is paying you to do it. Even people that top just for fun absolutely must remain cognizant of safety issues and consent issues at all times. If they are a good top, they are also thinking about the sub's pleasure quite a lot, because at the end of the day, if both parties aren't getting enjoyment out of it, the scene is kind of a failure. It's extremely rare that a Dom/me (pro or amateur) gets to just do whatever the fuck they want like a kid in a candy shop. For a professional cyber-Domme, you have to bear in mind that you're ultimately being paid to give the sub a satisfying experience.

 

[Rose]

Here are the rules for femdom/findom: there are NO rules. It is what you make it. Seriously. Charge whatever you want.

Just remember safe, sane, and consensual. Beyond that, get creative and do You. Everyone else has already given pretty spot on advice. Much like fetish work, femdom can go all over the place and has lots of room for creativity. Have fun with it. The more fun you're having and creating for your subs, the more money you'll make.

 

[ExcellaExe]

It seems to me that findoms are focused more around their OWN pleasure rather than fulfilling any specific fantasies their subs may have aside from draining their wallets for their dommes. I don't know how true that is, so please enlighten me. I personally plan to offer SOME generous incentive through phone calls, private shows, and things like that. I just plan to make them much more expensive than I normally would.

Hi. Findom/Femdom here. This is a bit false. Most Findoms absolutely focus on our subs subsets of kinks. Being a Top is a lot more than what we want, it's about finding out what the sub likes, and for lack of a better word exploiting it. Findoms can make it look effortless because that's what we want the subs to see--that's what a lot of Domme's want subs to see, that we're just effortlessly keeping them underfoot. The truth is it takes a lot of effort to be a Top. I have subs that I'm in almost constant contact with. There are some where it took me a week to figure out exactly the best way to hit them where it hurts, and now they're my best customers.

Also, the subs find pleasure in their wallets being drained and often that's the only aspect of the kink they want. When done right, subs love the thought of being driven into debt, of being subverted, of basically being turned into a workhorse for a Findom.

Try it out. Findom, like all other aspects of Femdom, might surprise you. You might find out that you're more into being a Top than you realize.

 

[AudriTwo]

my rule of findom is i'll believe it when i see it. so many "finslaves" like to larp it.

 

[mynameisbob84]

my rule of findom is i'll believe it when i see it. so many "finslaves" like to larp it.

I have $12,600,792, 25 Schmeckles, 12 Galactic Credits, and 0.00000000000001 Bitcoin in my account, Mistress. Shall I send it all to you now? I'm definitely not a time-waster. Shall I send you a picture of the mattress I keep my money under?

 

[IntravenousFlytrap]

Hi. Findom/Femdom here. This is a bit false. Most Findoms absolutely focus on our subs subsets of kinks. Being a Top is a lot more than what we want, it's about finding out what the sub likes, and for lack of a better word exploiting it. Findoms can make it look effortless because that's what we want the subs to see--that's what a lot of Domme's want subs to see, that we're just effortlessly keeping them underfoot. The truth is it takes a lot of effort to be a Top. I have subs that I'm in almost constant contact with. There are some where it took me a week to figure out exactly the best way to hit them where it hurts, and now they're my best customers.

Also, the subs find pleasure in their wallets being drained and often that's the only aspect of the kink they want. When done right, subs love the thought of being driven into debt, of being subverted, of basically being turned into a workhorse for a Findom.

Try it out. Findom, like all other aspects of Femdom, might surprise you. You might find out that you're more into being a Top than you realize.

Thank you, thank you, thank youuuuuu for this response! Very helpful. And yes, I'm definitely going to give it a shot. I've always been very sweet and vanilla when it comes to sex, but this findom scene REALLY piqued my interest, and now I'm wondering if I may actually LIKE being dominant for once? I've always been more submissive in my sex life, but this kink appeals to me more than I initially thought it would. I'm excited to try it out and see if I can't maybe raise some of my self-confidence while I'm at it being a domme, since I've never been in a dominant role in my entire life in any aspect whatsoever.

Thanks again for the helpful response! Mind if I add you as a friend? I'm trying to make as many findom friends as I can as well, so I have more people to turn to when I have questions or just want to share experiences with.

 

[IntravenousFlytrap]

While yes it can be lucrative, but so can any hustle as long as its done well. Why not build a really strong foundation before trying to spread yourself thin with all of the different approaches? It wasn't too long ago you started camming and made a thread about how to just have conversations with your members. Not shooting you down, just saying there isn't any "get rich quick" scheme when it comes to camming, if that's what interested you in findom in the first place - little effort, big reward fallacy. Like guys will just willingly take over your bills cause you're a bitch to them. lol. There has to be a "you" aspect to it as well. What separates you from the other chicks who want lots of money for virtual interactions, yknow?

Different websites appeal to different audiences and sure, there's "whales" on each of them. And even their interests might change over time. There isn't anything saying you can't find "whales" who will spoil you on mfc just for being you...or...cam you I should say. You might turn them off suddenly if you start changing your hustle and they're left scratching their heads like.."Why did this chick just increase her snapchat from 300 to 5000 tokens?" "What's with the personality change?" Etc. Etc.

The money is out there, just build some really solid foundations while you learn different approaches. And just suddenly changing your tags to "findom" isn't going to just attract dudes with thousands of dollars ready to just give it to you.

Sorry if this came across rude, I'm just sayin'.

Not rude at all! I totally understand what you're saying, and agree 100%. I'll admit when I first heard of it I thought "wow this looks like the easiest thing in the world", but now I realize there's a lot more going on behind the scenes than I originally thought. What everyone has been saying makes a ton of sense. I need to get to know potential subs, learn their kinks and whatnot, and then exploit them as a domme (correct me if I misunderstand). At first, I thought I could just start being a bitch and hashtag #findom and get the paypigs running to me, like you said. lol I quickly learned with a little research it doesn't work that way though.

Thanks for the response. It was helpful, not rude at all.

 

[IntravenousFlytrap]

This seems problematic. Findom is almost never pure findom. At its heart it's a type of BDSM and is very often co-morbid with other fetishes that you need to be able to accommodate.

Is your guy into findom because he likes the humiliating aspects of living on ramen while giving his money away like a fool? Does he like the humiliation and cuckoldry of knowing that he's financing lavish dates that you go on with other men? Does he like the fear and potential humiliation of being "blackmailed?" Is his fantasy that you arrange forced-bi prostitution scenarios so that he earns your money by sucking cock? Is he more of a slave looking for a firm but caring and sexy accountant Findomme to rule his finances so that he never has to think about it and only has to obey? Does he love to worship but hate his job, so this is his way of turning those dreaded 40 hours into submission (because now earning his paycheck is how he worships you)? Does his love of feet involve seeing his favorite pair in some of those expensive, red-soled shoes? Does he crave the adrenaline rush and feeling of non-consent when you take over his credit card or Amazon account and spend as you like (don't do that - it's not legal)? Is he just randomly overwhelmed by generosity when he hears a graphic depiction of how you will sit on his face and make him mine your dirty butthole with his tongue in search of some other man's cum?

If you are a Findomme but not a Femdomme, will you be able to identify your sub's co-morbid fetishes and be able to play with them?

From the outside, that's how it appears to be for all Dom(me)s. However, being a top is actually a whole lot of work, especially if someone is paying you to do it. Even people that top just for fun absolutely must remain cognizant of safety issues and consent issues at all times. If they are a good top, they are also thinking about the sub's pleasure quite a lot, because at the end of the day, if both parties aren't getting enjoyment out of it, the scene is kind of a failure. It's extremely rare that a Dom/me (pro or amateur) gets to just do whatever the fuck they want like a kid in a candy shop. For a professional cyber-Domme, you have to bear in mind that you're ultimately being paid to give the sub a satisfying experience.

Thanks for this post. Opened my mind up a little bit about the BDSM portion of it. It also put a lot of possible scenarios in my head to really think about and chew on. I guess I shouldn't have said I'm not into BDSM then... I never used to be into BDSM, but I'm now taking an interest in it, which is surprising to me since I've always been very sweet and vanilla when it comes to sex and fantasies and all that. But this findom thing has me really excited, even after reading this thread. I'm definitely serious about trying it out even more so now that I've read this thread. I'm so glad I made it because it's been very helpful.

Thanks for your response!

 

[IntravenousFlytrap]

Okay, this thread is awesome. Thank you all for responding. Each post was extremely helpful.

I'm naturally a very sweet, giving person in the camming world, so this kind of makes me excited to get into findom even more. Can I pull off being demanding and self-entitled while still letting my natural giving side of my personality to shine? I'm sure there's SOME way to make it work. And how, while staying true to myself, will I accomplish fulfilling my subs' fantasies and exploiting them at the same time? Really interesting ideas sprouting about in my mind... we'll see where this takes me!

 

[countrygirl0909]

While yes it can be lucrative, but so can any hustle as long as its done well. Why not build a really strong foundation before trying to spread yourself thin with all of the different approaches? It wasn't too long ago you started camming and made a thread about how to just have conversations with your members. Not shooting you down, just saying there isn't any "get rich quick" scheme when it comes to camming, if that's what interested you in findom in the first place - little effort, big reward fallacy. Like guys will just willingly take over your bills cause you're a bitch to them. lol. There has to be a "you" aspect to it as well. What separates you from the other chicks who want lots of money for virtual interactions, yknow?

Different websites appeal to different audiences and sure, there's "whales" on each of them. And even their interests might change over time. There isn't anything saying you can't find "whales" who will spoil you on mfc just for being you...or...cam you I should say. You might turn them off suddenly if you start changing your hustle and they're left scratching their heads like.."Why did this chick just increase her snapchat from 300 to 5000 tokens?" "What's with the personality change?" Etc. Etc.

The money is out there, just build some really solid foundations while you learn different approaches. And just suddenly changing your tags to "findom" isn't going to just attract dudes with thousands of dollars ready to just give it to you.

Sorry if this came across rude, I'm just sayin'.

This post is spot on. You truly do need to create a solid foundation. I have been laying it for years and am only just now starting to branch out. I think clients do expect some consistency in prices and personality. I found this post very helpful.